A/N: So because this chapter is taking me so long to write because its literally the longest chapter I've ever wrote (Its 11,920 words and counting) I've decided to give you guys a sneak peek to hopefully tide you over until I can finish it. I'm off sunday and monday for labor day so I'm hoping to get it about finished then if not those days, i'm off next weekend and I write bits and pieces every night after work so It should be done by then! This 4000 word sneak peek is only a FRACTION of the crazy stuff going on in this chapter. Enjoy! 

Blaire

Archie was packing up his notes and computer for the day when he turned and looked at me.
"Oh! Blaire. I don't think we had an appointment today, did we?" He asked. I shook my head.
"No. We didn't.. I just...I feel like I'm going crazy and I didn't know where else to go but if..you need me to leave so you can go home, I can." I said.
"No, no, have a seat. Talk to me." Archie smiled and put his bag down beside his desk and pulled his chair around to me and sat down. I sat down on the sofa in the room and chewed anxiously at my nails.
"What is going on?" Archie asked.
"I don't know how to say all of this without you sending me straight to the looney bin." I said.
"You don't have to worry about me sending you away Blaire. I've seen crazy and you are far from it. I know your anxiety can make you feel out of control but I promise you, you are not crazy." Archie said. "This is a safe place, you can talk to me about anything."
"I keep messing everything up. Will and Wendy are both mad at me and I deserve it I'm sure but it just really sucks when I need them the most, neither of them want to talk to me." I said.
"What makes you think you deserve their anger?" Archie asked.
"Its hard to explain." I sighed. I didn't feel comfortable telling Archie about the unknown number thats been making my life a living hell. I knew he would recommend me going to the police and there was just too much at stake if I took this to the police.
"Sometimes, our fears and our anxieties make us push the people we love away. We're afraid that our troubles are a burden on them. Sometimes it may feel easier to not have people around when you feel unstable, you feel your life is crashing down all around you and you don't want the people you care about getting caught in the middle." Archie explained.
"Exactly." I said.

"Those feelings can trigger what I like to refer to as a self destruction mode in your brain, You feel like you deserve to not have your friends and you start a chain of sabotaging the rest of the relationships with people around you until you are completely isolated." Archie said.
"I don't want to lose my friends though. I just don't know how to keep them all safe." I said feeling tears welling up in my eyes. "I keep fucking everything up. I'm so angry all the time, I almost hurt Emma at lunch today. I haven't been able to sleep well in three days. The most sleep I've gotten without interruption was in Algebra this morning and thats because the teacher just let me sleep. I keep seeing things and I can't tell if they're real or not." I said and raked my fingers through my hair.

Archie tried his best to hide the overwhelming concern on his face, probably to keep me from freaking out even more, but I could see it.
"And there it is." I said and stood up. "You do think I'm crazy!"
Archie stood up and put his hands out.
"Blaire, I do not think you are crazy. You know how I feel about that word. I'm only concerned." Archie said. "Are you having nightmares again? Lack of sleep can certainly cause hallucinations. We just need to get to the root of why you aren't sleeping."
"My life right now is a never ending nightmare." I said as I paced the floor.
"Lets talk about what you are seeing, when you say you are seeing things that you aren't sure are real." Archie said.
"I keep seeing this guy..with a mask on, its just a white mask with almost no features.Just two holes for the eyes. He dresses all in black and wears a hoodie with the hood pulled up over his head. I saw him this morning behind my truck but when I went to look for him, he wasn't there, and then I saw him again at school in the cafeteria after Wendy and I had an argument." I said.
"Have you seen him before?" Archie asked.
"Once and now I'm starting to wonder if that was real too. A while back I was home alone and it sounded like someone was trying to break in, and there was knocking on the kitchen window and when I looked, there he was, so I ran up stairs and grabbed the baseball bat we keep in the hallway, I heard someone come in the house, and up the stairs and when they got to the hallway, I swung the bat. I almost killed David. It was David." I said.

"It sounds to me like whatever is causing your lack of sleep and your anxiety is manifesting itself visually for you. It can be terrifying, and it can feel very real, but you have to know that its not." Archie said.
"How do I stop it then?" I asked and stopped pacing.
"Well, we can increase your medications a little, If you're having trouble falling asleep, I can add something to help but ultimately, we need to find out what is causing it. You've been through a lot this last year and I know that we've talked about you feeling guilty for your mothers murder, is there anything else you may feel at blame for?" Archie asked. "Guilt is one of big causes of sleep deprivation."
I tilted my head to the side and watched Archie carefully.
"Why did you ask that?" I asked.
"If I've offended you Blaire I'm truly sorry. That wasn't my intention."
I started pacing again.
"He's gotten to you too." I said. "I can't go anywhere without him always being one step ahead." I mumbled.
"Blaire..who are you talking about?" Archie asked.
"What did he tell you?" I asked.
"Blaire I don't know what you are talking about." Archie said.
"Bullshit!" I yelled.
"I really need you to settle down Blaire." Archie said calmly. "I don't know whats going on, but I do know you're confused, and you're probably scared."
"What did he tell you?" I asked and stepped forward with my fists balled at my sides. Archie stepped back looking rather alarmed.
"Who are you talking about Blaire? The man with the mask?" Archie asked as I continued stepping towards him.
"So you do know him." I said.
"I only know what you've told me." Archie said and put his hands out.
"I don't know how he knew, but he knew I would come here today...but he got here first." I scoffed. "I can't win. No matter what I do, this isn't going to end. So why even fucking bother?!" I shouted and kicked one of the chairs in the room.It hit the wall and turned on its side.

"Blaire!" Archie said raising his voice, startling me. He was always so soft spoken. I blinked at him, I looked down at my balled fists and then at the chair on its side. I looked back at Archie.
"I...I'm so sorry!" I exclaimed.
"Hey.. it's okay." Archie said.
"Its not! I almost hurt you!" I said and let out a sob and sat down on the sofa again and pulled my knees up to my chest trembling. Archie crouched down in front of me.
"But you didn't Blaire. I'm okay." He said softly.
"I don't even know what happened." I cried.
"Do you remember any of what you were saying just now?" Archie asked.
I shook my head.
"Thats what scares me the most." I sniffled. "It flips on and off like a switch and I feel so out of control. I don't want to hurt anyone. Maybe you should lock me away somewhere."
"Hey, that is not going to happen. We will work through this together. I don't see any need to have you hospitalized. But I want to start seeing you weekly, maybe twice a week. Okay?" He asked.
I nodded.
Archie smiled and stood up walking to his desk for his phone. "Did you drive here?" He asked.
"No, I got a ride..I left my truck at the school." I said.
"Would it be okay if I call your Uncle to come pick you up?" Archie asked.
I nodded again and turned my head to the side watching the rain outside.

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There was a silence between David and I as he was driving. The only sounds was the low rumble of thunder, the wind hitting the windshield, and the slight squeak from the windshield wipers.
"Have I done something to upset you?" He asked breaking the silence.
"What? No..not at all. Why?" I asked.
"Well, its just for a while things seemed to be running pretty smoothly between us. You talked to me about things that were bothering you and lately it feels like we've moved three steps backwards, you stopped talking and you seem angry all the time, like when you first came to town." David said.
"You didn't do anything." I said.
"While you were in the car waiting Archie told me a little about what happened." David admitted.
"So much for patient confidentiality." I sighed.
"He didn't go into details, just that he was very concerned. That was the deal, remember? He'd only involve me if he thought you or anyone else was at risk." David said. "He mentioned there was a moment where you didn't seem yourself, you were confused."
"I don't really remember much of it. I just need some sleep.." I said.
"He wrote a new prescription for that, we're going to go pick it up now. He also wants to increase the dosage on your other. I'm keeping you home from school tomorrow." David said.
"Okay." I said.

"Blaire I'm trying not to push too hard, but something or someone is bothering you and I just want you to talk to me. I'm not your father, I'm not going to be angry with you, Whatever is going on you can tell me and we will figure out how to make it better."
I wiped a tear away from my eyes before it fell.
"I..don't want to talk about it." I said. Talking to David about what happened back in Oregon to Dylan might have been a good way to get this unknown texter off my back considering David was the sheriff so technically I would be going to the police. But I just couldn't. I know he said he wouldn't have been angry with me, but once he found out that I pretty much killed someone? That would probably change that in a heartbeat. David was nice to me and I just didn't want to see the look of disappointment on his face once he found out what I had done.

"Its just been a really bad week, Will and I are fighting right now and We have this huge project for Mr. Jones' class due Friday and thats not going to get done. We haven't even started and to make everything ten times worse, today is my moms birthday." I sniffled. "And.. usually when Kass and I would fight, she was who I'd talk to."
"Blaire I'm sorry I totally forgot it was your mothers birthday." David said. "I don't know if there is anything I can do to make whats left of this day easier for you..but if there is anything.."
"I just need time, and space tonight Uncle Dave. I'm going to look through my moms stuff tonight and watch some of our favorite shows."
"Okay. If thats what you want, then thats what you will get." David said and pulled into the pharmacy parking lot.
"Do you want to come in?" he asked.
"No, I'll stay out here...can you bring me a root beer?" I asked.
"You got it." David smiled and got out of the car. "Be right back." He added and shut the door and walked into the Pharmacy.

I pulled out my phone and clicked on my text messages with Killian.

Me:
Sorry for the spaz attack today.. Today had bad written all over it from the start. I'm okay. KJ: No need to apologize. You can call if you want.Me: I'm at the pharmacy with my Uncle, I went coo coo for cocoa puffs on my poor shrink today.. New dosage on meds and a new one to help me sleep. KJ: Define coo coo for cocoa puffs love. I Hope the new meds help, I've been worried about you. Liam said you slept all through his class. I told him not to be insulted that Algebra is generally a boring subject. ;) Me: He does tend to drone on and on. And I'm fine. Lack of sleep has me a little messed up. KJ: Whats keeping you up? Me: Maybe its the thought of a certain history teacher that I'm absolutely crazy about? KJ: Well lucky him. Me: ;) KJ:
Be real with me now. What's on your mind?

I sighed heavily and bit my lip. I wanted to tell him everything, but after I told Will everything our friendship took a hit and I just didn't want to lose Killian too. I looked up from my phone to see David standing at the checkout counter. I shifted my gaze to the parking lot. I gasped and dropped my phone. Across the parking lot was the masked man I'd been seeing lately. I couldn't do this anymore. I got out of Davids truck and walked towards the man in the pouring rain. I stopped about mid way through the parking lot, my heart was thundering in my chest as I stood staring at the figure that had been tormenting me. The figure lifted his hand and waved at me tauntingly. I growled and took a step forward.

"Blaire! What are you doing out of the truck its pouring!" David said from behind me. I turned my head to look back at him, and then looked back to where the figure was standing. Was. He wasn't there anymore. I felt an overwhelming sense of defeat that was nearly paralyzing, or maybe it was the fact that I was so tired I just didn't want to move anymore so I stood there, in the rain because I didn't even know what else to do. "Blaire..honey what are you doing?" David asked as he stood next to me and took off his coat holding it above my head trying to shield me from the rain. "I don't know." I said honestly. "Lets get back in the truck, okay?" He asked calmly and then he draped his jacket over my shoulders and turned me towards the truck and lead me back to the truck. I looked over my shoulder and still the figure was gone. What if Archie was right? what if my guilt about what happened to Dylan was actually manifesting this nightmare I seemed to be living?

I got back into the truck, shivering. David got in, and started the truck and turned on the heat. "Lets get you home, and get you some rest." David said and handed me my phone that I had left on floor of the truck. I just nodded and looked at my phone as David pulled out of the pharmacy parking lot.

KJ: Blaire? Are you okay? Me: Yeah. Sorry I think the storm knocked out my service for a minute. Heading home now. David is keeping me home tomorrow. KJ: Okay love, you had me worried. That is probably for the best, you looked exhausted today. Go home and take care of yourself please? Me: I will. I promise.

"So why didn't you drive your truck after school?" David asked. "Oh, it wouldn't start and it was starting to rain so I couldn't really work on it." I lied. I was getting better at lying on the spot, and that probably wasn't a good thing. "Well, I'll go take a look at it tomorrow morning and see if I can figure it out." David said. "Sure." I nodded. I didn't even have the energy to try and argue it or to think of what I would say when he told me it started just fine tomorrow morning.

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When we got home, David handed me my new prescriptions. "He raised your dose of Zoloft, but wants to keep the Buspar the same, and the new one for sleep should be taken 30 minutes before you plan to go to bed. The pharmacist said it should make you pretty drowsy so make sure you are ready to get into bed when you are taking it." "Okay." I said. "Thanks." I added. I tucked the pharmacy bags under my chin and lifted the box of my moms things from the floor in the living room. "I'm going to look through some of this in my room." I said. "Okay." David said. "If you need us.." "I know where to find you." I nodded and turned around and walked up the stairs.

When I got in my room I set the box down on my bed and picked up the tv remote, and flipped through my streaming services and put on Ghost Hunters. Mom and I used to love binging this show and most of the time we could only do it on her birthday because that was one of the only days she usually always got off work. Bowie jumped up onto my bed and rubbed against my arms. "You wanna watch the ghost boys with me?" I smiled and scooped him up and kissed his nose. He'd gotten out of that stage where he liked to be held a lot, so he wiggled out of my arms and jumped down and started batting one of his toys around the room.

 I sighed and opened up the box of my moms things and looked inside. The first thing that was on top was a photo album my mom had kept with pictures of me as I grew. I smiled as I flipped through the pictures and came to a picture of her, my dad, and me around the age of 6. They both looked happy, and I did too, I couldn't remember what we were doing in the picture, it wasn't marked. I knew that it wasn't as simple as this picture made it look, and they weren't as happy as they looked, I was too young to really understand here but I wanted with everything I had to go back to this picture and stay forever. I missed my mom so much, much more than I ever thought I could, and as much as an asshole as he was, I kind of missed my Dad too.

I wiped tears from my eyes and put the photo album to the side and reached into the box and pulled out a plastic bag that was tied and a note attached to it. "I think you and your mom were almost the same size, so I thought you might want some of her tee shirts. <3 Kass" I tore into the bag and pulled out one of my moms band tee shirts and held it against my face. It still smelled like her. I decided to take a quick break from looking in the box and change out of my school clothes. I stood up, and peeled my school uniform off and threw it into the laundry hamper. I walked over to the dresser and opened it, digging through it until I found my favorite lounge pants with the MTV logo on them, and I pulled them on and grabbed a pair of comfortable fuzzy socks and slipped them on my feet and then dodged bowie as he tried to pounce on my feet all the way back to the bed. He loved attacking my feet when i had fuzzy socks on. I picked up my moms Metallica tee shirt and slid it on, My mom wasn't much bigger than I was, she was only a little taller than me so it fit pretty good. I threw my hair up in a bun, and sat back down on my bed tucking my feet under me, to keep them safe from Bowie. I picked up my phone from the nightstand and opened the camera and took a selfie and sent it to Kass.
Me: You have no idea, how much this means to me. Thank you. <3. Kass: You're welcome <3 How are you doing today? I've been meaning to call but school has been a bitch. Me: Its...been a rough day to be honest, but this makes it better. Kass: I'm so sorry. I wish I could be there for you today...Me: It's okay. So... I've been thinking of coming to visit, maybe during spring break. I..kind of want to see my Dad. Kass: You know I'm all for you visiting babe. But are you sure? Me: I don't know. I feel like I need to talk to him and the things I have to say are much better heard in person. Kass: Are you planning on coming out alone? Me: I doubt it. I don't think my Uncle would let me travel all that way by myself, especially if he knows I want to visit my Dad in prison while there. Kass: Well you could always bring Mr. Dreamboat with you. I wouldn't mind seeing him again ;) Me: Lmao He's mine. Find your own Teacher. Maybe Mr. Collins? The only reason we ever showed up for Algebra 1. :P Kass: He got married. Tragic right? Me: Absolutely devastating. Kass: Dad and I are about to go grab some take out. Talk to you later! Me: Talk to you later. Miss you bitch. Kass: Miss you too bitch.

I put my phone back on the nightstand and pulled the box of my moms things to me and looked inside again. There was a collection of a lot of the artwork I had made her from Kindergarten to a couple years ago. I was surprised by how much of it she actually kept. There was a small box of the Christmas ornaments I had made for her in Elementary school. Maybe I'd give them to David and Mary-Margaret. A lot of the ornaments on their tree last year were made by Emma. There was a knock on my bedroom door. "Come in." I said. The door opened and Emma walked in carrying two plates of food on one arm. "Shit let me help." I said and went to get up. "I got it. You aren't the only waitress in the family." Emma smirked and set a plate with a couple slices of pizza and a salad with ranch on it on my night stand. "Dad didn't think you'd want to be social, but I didn't want you to eat alone. I hope you don't mind Pizza considering you work in a pizza place, but the cravings are real tonight and I got to pick." Emma said.

"Pizza is fine." I said and picked up my laptop table beside my bed, and put it on the bed and put my plate on it. Emma sat in my computer chair. I went to pick up a slice of pizza, and paused and looked at Emma. "I'm really sorry for freaking out on you at lunch today." I said. "Its okay. I overheard Dad talking with Mom about an incident at Archies office...I didn't mean to snoop but it sounded like what happened on lunch..." Emma said. "Yeah...I kind of lost myself for a moment. It was much worse at Archie's office than at lunch." I sighed and took a bite out of my pizza.

"You know you can tell me whats up right? Something seems to be really bothering you." Emma said. "And.. I know you said something about having less secrets to be responsible for and.. I think I'm going to introduce my parents to Neal and tell them I'm pregnant soon." She added. "Em, I didn't mean what I said earlier...I just have a lot going on." I frowned. "Don't tell them just because of what I said." "It isn't because of what you said Blaire. I need to tell them eventually and if I don't do it soon, they're going to figure it out on their own and I'd rather tell them before that happens." Emma said. "My parents...are a lot more understanding than either of us give them credit for." "You're probably right." I said. "And better for them to find out through you than someone else." I said.

"What do you mean? I've only told You and Neal." Emma said. "Will knows...he promised he's not going to say anything and I trust him but the only reason he knows is..." I paused and hesitated I wasn't sure Emma knowing about the unknown texter would be a good thing. I didn't want him coming after her too. "Blaire?" Emma questioned and rolled the chair she was in over to my bed where I was sitting. I sighed heavily. She had to know that someone else knew, just like Killian would have to know soon that someone else more dangerous knew about our secret. "Will knows, because someone else knows and Will has seen the messages from that person." I said. "Well who knows??" Emma asked. "I honestly don't know Emma. This guy has been tormenting me since New Years with creepy fucking text messages and calls, he knows everything about me, he knows about you and Neal and he knows about Killian, and he says our whole family is full of secrets and he knows them all." I blurted out.