Not without you
The sun was up, spreading light all around. The curtains covering the windows of my room could not stop the rays to sneak in and light it up. I woke up as the rays striked into my eyes.
It was one of those December sunny mornings, spreading warmth in the ice-like weather. I opened my eyes only to find him sleeping like a toddler with his mouth half open. Seeing him sleep like that made my heart and lips, both smile. It was a sight that I had always wanted to start my day with. His arms were still holding me tight even in his deep sleep like always. I lifted my hands up and pressed his chin from below to close his half open mouth and admired the man I loved. Then I removed his hands from around me and got up to move out. I slipped half out of the bed when I a sudden pull of my hand put me back in his arms.
"Parth... Tum jaag rahe ho?" I asked admiring his beautiful face.
"Hmm.. But let's sleep again" he pressed me against his chest hugging me tight in his arms.
"Hato, chalo utho.." I said as managed to get my head out of his arms. "Uthooo" I said as I slipped out of the bed covering myself with the linen that had been removed off the bed last night.
"I want to sleep more.." He cribbed like a 3 year old who was being forced to go to school. He pulled the blanket over him and went back to sleep.
"Parth get up don't trouble me, subha ho gayi hai and mom dad, anyone can come to my room now..." I searched my cupboard for my clothes and saying that I went to take a bath.
"Parth utho na!" I came out of the bathroom after around fifteen minutes and he was still sleeping.
I walked up to him and bringing my wet hair down on one shoulder, I sprinkled the water in them over his face. They landed onto his face like rain drops of a light drizzle. A smile settled on his lips immidiately and he shut his eyes tight and then squinted to make his view clear.
"Uth jao" I said in a light and soft tone. He pulled me close and kissed on my cheek. "Uthoo!" I pushed him away standing straight again.
"Fine." He immediately got up and stomping his feet went into the bathroom.
I turned back and walked to the mirror. I saw the reflection in it. Someone was happier than before, someone actually glowed that day. The smile on my face lingered over it since the moment I woke up. There were butterflies in my stomach fluttering since forever! My smiled widened a bit more. I lifted my top a little and stood facing the mirror sideways. I put my hand over my belly trying to feel the bump which hadn't yet formed. I looked in the mirror, it was flat as it had been. I was busy admiring the soul hidden in my not-so-bumby flat belly when I felt his hand slide onto my waist. He placed his chin over my glenoid and moved his hands over my belly trying to do what I was doing. I looked to my right, into the mirror. It was a perfect picture of us, together, in love.
"Morning.." he whispered into my ears bringing his lips over them. I felt them touch my ears and I felt his breath over them causing my body to shiver. We had done all sort of things, been together for the last 6-7 months but one that did not change even now was this. He somehow always managed to intimidate me. His presence so close to me ran shivers down my body, my nerves and veins went numb everytime. He turned me around to face him and wrapped me in his arms. I looked up at his face, my hands resting lightly over his broad chest. He looked into my eyes and smiled his most beautiful warm smile. He brought his face closer to mine and just when our lips were about to meet..
"Niti?" I heard a knock on my door.
I looked at his flustered expression and giggled, "Pyaar ke dushman" he said with a cute irritated expression and set me free from his grip. I giggled at his irritated look and went to open the door.
I opened the door expecting it to be my sister but I was shocked to see my mother behind it.
"Maa?" I thought she wouldn't want to talk to me ever after last night but there she was standing in front of me.
"Where is Parth?" she asked straight.
"W...w..ww..why?" I stammered getting nervous. I didn't know what she would do now. Throw him out now that dad left for work? Or throw me out too?
"He wasn't in the guest room so.. where is he?" her tone was normal. No hatred, no anger, just a normal tone.
I looked at her face like an idiot. I had no clue what to say, what to do or how to react. I kept looking at her, my eyes blinking frequently while my brain rushed to think of some excuse. I looked a complete retard, zapped in front of her.
"He is inside right?" she knew. Dammit.
"Mumma please... don't send him away please.." I pleaded her as she made her way into my room.
"Niti.. Bahar jaa." she said as she stood facing Parth. "I want to talk to him" she gave her final word.
I looked at Parth and he looked back at me with the same confused and scared expression. My Mom was the only person he was scared of. Dad didn't bother him much but Mom.. scared the shit out of him.
"Maa.."
"Niti come let's go out.." I was interrupted by my sister who came in and pulled me out of the room. She shut the door behind her leaving my mother and Parth inside.
"Di mom... Parth.. Di.." I was freaking out. I was standing outside my room, dying out of tension every passing second.
"Chill, relax.. She's there to talk. Maaregi nahi usko tu tension mat le.." She said as she sat on the stairs stuffing sandwich into her mouth. I seated myself next to her and waited for the door to open.
----
"Phir tum chale jaana.." I heard the door open and I turned back instantly. My mother came out saying those words and I sprang up on my feet.
"Aaram se!" shouted my mother as I was about to tumble again. My sister held my arm and made me steady.
"Chale jaana? Kahaan? Mom? Kya..? Kaun jayega? Mom please don't send him away, I love him.. Please mumma don't please.." I kept on babbling stuff without even stopping for once. I didn't want him gone, I wanted him to stay with me. "..mumma he needs to stay with the baby too.. Haina? A baby needs its father too right? Please don't do this.." I stopped when I saw a smile taking over her stern expression and she just walked down.
"Radhika.. Get them down for breakfast." she said as she went into the kitchen.
"Haan mom!" replied my sister, then looking at me she said.. "Nahi ja raha koi kahin.. Stop freaking out" she laughed at my tensed expression. I had sweat drops over my forehead. What surprised me more was when I saw Parth joining her in for a good laugh. I was clueless. Dumb like a dodo.. I didn't know what was there to laugh at?
"Chalooo.." Parth pulled my hand and took me into the room.
"Kya hai ye sab? Why are you laughing haan?" I asked him getting frustrated being clueless now.
He took me by my arms and held me close to him. I protested because I was in no mood for romance! I needed to know what the hell was going on! "She said she wants to give me a chance, she said for you she would will accept me and that she wants to trust me once again." That was just enough to bring me tears. Tears rolled down my cheeks and a smile arose over my lips. I couldn't believe that my mother had actually done this for me. "Arre ismein bhi you have to shed mote mote tears?" he said smiling and wiping my tears off with his thumbs.
"Matlab...we.. can.. Matlab.. She.. Us... Parthh!" I hugged him tight as I couldn't express my happiness in words. I clung tight to his chest never wanting to leave him. He hugged me back. "And she said she wants to talk to my mother too and she wants us to get engaged at least if not married yet and then..."
"And then we'll go back to Mumbai and you'll go back to acting and we'll get our normal lives back! Just the two of us.." and then breaking the hug my hand went over to my belly, "..and our baby" I smiled with rolling tears.
"Sorry to disturb your moment guys but mom bula rahi hai agar khaana hai toh aa jao" my sister broke in our moment and giggled.
"Haan coming.." said Parth without breaking our eye contact.
"Nahi abhi chalo.." she pulled both our hands and dragged us out of the room.
This was the first time when I walked down the stairs with Parth, hand in hand, with no fear. He entangled our fingers together. Coming down the first thing I did was to run into kitchen. I saw my mother stirring the pan and I ran to hug her.
"Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank youuuu mummaa" I said hiding myself within her warm embrace. "Thank you mumma.." I said again now breaking the hug.
"I just did what I should have done earlier.. Kal raat your dad and I, we talked.. He made me realize what I had done to Radhika.." she said as her voice cracked up, ".. I cannot undo the damage that has been done already.." she wiped of a lone tear that rolled down her cheeks and smiled at me, "..but I can prevent one. I was a terrible mother to the both of you.. Tumhare upar I forced things and didn't care about what you thought.. And specially with Radhika.. I.. "
"Mommm pleaseeeeee!" she was interrupted by my sister, "Chodo na, all that. What's done is done, abhi jaldi khaana dedo bahar aapka bhookha damaad baitha hai.." she giggled.
"Haan mumma khaana nahi doge toh mujhe kha jayega!" We three bursted out laughing and giggling.
Everything was falling back in place. Everything seemed so perfect! Like a dream! I hoped and hoped for all of us to remain just like this..
----
It was late in the afternoon and no one was at home, it was only me and Parth. We were in my room trying to catch some sleep because the previous night had got us none. I snuggled in his arms and we both slept peacefully after a very long time. We woke up by the ringing of Parth's phone.. He stretched his arm to pick up the phone lying on the side table.
"Hello?" he said in a sleepy voice. A long silence followed after that. "No we can't, I mean I can't and she can't either. I'm sorry I am done with this and I don't want to start up anything again.. at least not in the near future" I had no idea what he was talking about and to whom, "I don't want to consider it, not now please.." he said again in a firm voice, "haan Thank You, Bye." After a long 10 minute conversation he cut the phone and put it back on the table and lay facing me once again.
"Kaun tha?" I asked him.
"Niti tumne apna number change kiya hai kya?"
"Haan didn't you figure that out?" I thought he would know, I had changed my number because I didn't want him to contact me after our breakup and plus I had been receiving a lot of unwanted phone calls.
"That is why I couldn't reach you.. I thought you blocked my number" he said looking at me.
"Haaan" I signed, "block bhi kar diya tha.. Lekin anyways who was it?"
"Production!" He said as he straightened himself on the bed, "they want us to come back.. I mean its been around two weeks and nothing over there is good."
"Haan Parth why did you leave the show?" I asked already knowing the answer. I was trying my best to hide my teeth who were wanting to be be visible wide and clear.
"Tum thi nahi.. Main kya karta waha? Plus I was angry and I didn't want your memories with me .. But madam.." he faced me, "you never wanted to leave my brain, Mumbai, Pune jahan bhi I went I couldn't get you out of my head.."
"Good, you shouldn't even.. Ever!" I said mocking at him.. "Lekin Parth you can go back to acting right? Its what you love the most.. Toh chale jao na.." I said.
"Tum chalogi?" he asked sitting up straight.
"Main kaise chal sakti hoon? If you have forgotten.. I'm pregnant Mister" I too sat up straight facing him.
"Haan but after that? Will you resume acting? Will you come with me to Mumbai?" he asked in a serious tone.
"Mumbai... I will come but Parth I don't I want to act now.. I mean.. I will soon have two babies to take care of, big responsibility you see." I laughed a light laugh as he got his hint but he didn't react. Okay. "I won't act again please.. I cannot take those rumors and those humiliations and if you don't know we have to answer a lot of people.. Hasn't Charlie contacted you?"
"A million missed calls. Ayaz, Uttu sabka.." He said sounding off.
"And why didn't you pick it up?" I asked.
"What will I say? She'll kill me through the phone, I literally spoiled her engagement. She will murder me. And Ayaz, vo toh mujhe taane de dekar maar dega.. About us.. But I will, now that I have you back and now that I am sorted... I will answer them all!" He sighed thinking of what all would he say to save his ass.
"About us?"
"You didn't let me tell anyone earlier, and he always suspected there was something going on.. He asked me quite a few times but maine kuch nahi bataya and hence the taane!" Well I hadn't thought about all of it, I didn't want to go back to that world. For Mumbai I agreed because of Parth but I didn't want to go back to that world where I had not even a single private moment.
"Parth tum jao, have you seen yourself act? You act so brilliant! Tumse pehle toh I fell in love with Manik, I will come with you to Mumbai but no more acting for me. Vaise bhi papa doesn't want me to act.." I said as my father's face flashed into my head.
"Okay then, I won't too. Vaise bhi I have my exams in three months and then I'll finally be an architect, I'll look for a job and then we'll get settled.. All sorted?" He didn't consider my compliment even once and just denied considering acting again.
"Parth what is this? Its about your career here don't talk rubbish.. I cannot na.. Pregnant hoon main and uske baad bhi Parth mujhe nahi karna na.. I mean we can't let the whole wide media world know about my pregnancy can we? Like seriously you don't know..." I tried talking sense into him but he interrupted me in between.
"Niti! No. Either I go back with you.. Or else I don't. Not without you. Period." he said strictly.
"Parth.. Lekin.."
"Let's go down, I'm hungry.." He said pulling me out of the bed ignoring my protests.
"Aaah Fine!" I knew there was no point debating, he would not listen to me" You will cook, I won't." I said taking my hand away and crossing them.
"Main? Mujhe nahi aata kuch banana.." He said with a cute pouty face.
"Let's teach you then!" I said taking him along outside the room behaving all expert - like.
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