I don't know how long I cried into Fili's arms. Three years, I've missed three years. Fili looked as if he'd been stabbed over and over again. My twins where three now, so that means I've missed three years with them. But the other two were doing okay with finding out that they haven't missed to much. But Landon was at the same state with me.

We've just missed three years of our kids life. My son was currently with Fili and I. Our daughter was with Dis at this time because she doesn't understand why daddy is holding and crying of another girl. I don't really blame her, because Fili told them I left but I wouldn't be back for a while. Plus I wouldn't just want my dad to say that mommy was gone and to see another girl with my father. But I haven't asked Fili has shown them a picture of me ever.

"I'll go and see how the others are holding up." Fili said breaking the silence. "Want to come with little man?" He asked Gili.

"Me good!" He replied.

Fili shrugged and kissed my forehead before leaving. I let out a big sigh and Gili turned around and looked at me confused. He got up from the floor and made his way over the the dresser. He pulled something out and walked over next to me. He tried to put a piece of paper by my face but since I was sitting on the bed it was a little hard for him. I laughed lightly and sat down on the ground. He smiled happily and put the paper next to my face.

Excitement came from him and he laughed lightly.

"MAMA?" He yelled "MAMA!!!"  He said again.

"Gili-" I started

"No, ew mama, ew her!" He turned the paper around and point to the Lady. I smiled big as I saw the picture of me. I guess Fili did tell them.

"Baby." I cupped his face. "I've missed you so much! I love you, I hope you know that."

I was taken off guard when he kissed my noise then hugged me. His body was so small but muscular, that surprised me. He was only a baby but he had muscles like Fili. 'Like father like son.' I thought to myself. When Gili let go, I kissed his cheek and he smiled big.

"I luv ew tew mama!" I smiled at him. I stood up and brushed my dress. I felt a small tug on my dress and I looked down to find Gili with his hands raised up high. "Up!" He pouted. I sighed and pulled him to my hip. I smiled big at him and he did the same, then rested his head on my shoulder.

After me walking around the room a little bit. Making my son fall asleep in my arms. He was snoring lightly as I walked out on the balcony, looking at the green land that rounded the mountain. It felt good to be here again but three years WOW!

I was out there for a little while. Until I felt another tug on my dress. I looked down to see a shy blondes haired girl looked up at me with watery eyes. Sadness come over me, I felt guilty in a way. I knelt down in front of her and tucked a pace of hair behind her ear.

"May, why are you crying?" I asked her.

"Daddy, ew gone." She cried.

"Yes I was gone but now I'm back. I'll never leave ever. I never ment to leave you or brother or......daddy. I promise I promise!" Now I was crying again. Her little hands found my cheeks and she kissed my noise.

"Mama...........daddy tewgefer?" She tilted her head.

I brought my right hand to her face and held it. She nozzed into my touch.

"Yes!" I answered weakly. I honesty didn't know, I mean I hope so. I was still wearing my ring but he hasn't said anything to me about us. Its been three years here not three days. But I couldn't tell my three year old daughter that I don't know if me and her father are together.

She giggled and I stood up. She laced her tiny hand around mine and giggled again but she pointed at her brother that was still asleep in my arms. I smiled and led her back over to the door.

"How about we find daddy?" I asked Lili nodded quickly making her hair bounce. I opened the door and she ran out and waited for me to shut the door. She grabbed my hand again, then started biting her sweater.

"Are you shy?" I asked quietly, she looked up at me and nodded again. "Well its okay mama was like that too but my mama helped me became social. I can help you to but I bet you really don't understand what I'm saying. But-" I smiled. "Mama will help you!" She smiled wide.

"Rwealy?" She asked and I nodded yes.

~~~~~~ Time Skip~~~~~~

I was getting mad by the second. Gili is getting heavier and heavier. Lili is becoming inpatient just like me. We still haven't found anyone, well not anyone I'm looking for. Many others looked surprised to see me and my kids.

Since I was getting really mad I just wanted out of Erebor. Then it hit me its summer, its warm, the river. I don't think they've been out of the mountain.

"Lili?" I looked at her.

"Mmm." She hummed.

"Outside. Yes or no?" Her face brighted up.

"YSSSS!!!" She squealed. I took her had and made my way to the stables, as we were walking there I thought about Randsome I haven't been with him in forever. I was getting excited to see my horse. When we got there I spotted him, and I basically ran over to him I started petting him and giving him kisses.

"Ready to go out again boy. Be gentle thses are my kids. You'll begin to get to know them." I pet him one last time. I gentle set Gili down on hay and picked up Lili placing her on him. I put her hands on his maine "Hold this tight!" She nodded. She squealed as Randsome laid down. I pick Gili back up in my arms and got on Randsome.

Lili-May held on tightly as Randsome got back up and started down the side of the mountian. Lili  enjoyed the ride that's when I asked her to come down she didn't.

"Lili-May you can ride later. Now down!" She huffed and slid off him. I let Randsome roam free, until I needed him. I slowly put Gili down and called Lili over. She giggled as I took off her dress and other clothes till she was naked. "Don't go to far." She nodded and went a little ways into the water. She splashed around while I woke Gili up.

He pushed me away and them Lili splashed water at him. He got up and held up his arms. I laughed and took off his clothes. When they were all off he didn't wait a second to run in after his sister. He started splashing her. 

After about twenty minutes they settled down and just sat in the water.

I sighed to myself. I was happy the only thing that would make it better was if Fili was here. I truly really did miss him. I really hope we're together I mean. I couldn't stand another episode like we had, I'm still hurt by that. But I mean he gave me his mothers ring and we talked about marriage plenty of times.

"Hey!" I heard a husky voice behind me. I turned around to see Fili leaning on a tree. "I was looking for you."

"Why didn't you come here first silly?" I asked patting the ground next to me. He sat down next to me but pulling me into his lap.

"I did....its been three years but I still know you....you come out here to think. To be alone or to be happy. I never understood it."

"And never will." I added, he laughed.

"Exactly... But really what are you thinking about?" His voice was weak.

"Us..." I whispered. "Are we together or-" I was interrupted by his lips crashing into mine. I smiled against the kiss. He pulled away and hugged me.

"Don't you ever say that again. I lost you once, twice actually if you count the three years. I want to get married." He whispered the last part.

"You what?" I asked.

He pulled me up and got down on one knee.

"Erudite, my best friend, my mother of my two beautiful children, my whole world...... Well I love ye, lass, that much is true; and never would I lie to you. I've been around the town, for sure and tippled off a time or two. I've stolen kisses now and then (though always fairly given, them) and fled the scene right after.But hear me, lass, and hear me true; though in the past I've had some brews with all those stolen kisses I've accrued- I'll give it all for you. I'll forswear drink forevermore and walk right by that old pub door. I'll never give those girls a look- and if I could, return the ones I took.I love you, more than words can say and so I won't, instead I'll ask and pray: Lass, won't you take this poor, repentant guy and be his blushing, gorgeous bride?"

I started to cry. "YES!" I shouted.

"Finally.....I took me forever to get that right!!!"

"You did have three years!" I laughed and so did he.

Fili got up and hugged me then started kissing me. We pulled apart with two little voices crying out. Fili pulled away from me and picked them out of the water.

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A/N

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