Carrington Hill

The happiness on Harry's face was everything I have wanted to see the second I came up with the plan. The comfort, the love, the excitement, the peacefulness... it was worth everything.

He spent hours on end just catching up with his youngest sister and it made my heart melt. He was so focused on her and everything she had to say that he never missed one word that left her mouth. He had a response to everything, even if it wasn't in the form of words, he laughed, he smiled or pouted. Whatever fitted the mood.

Lily had plans for the rest of the day and Anne was the one who had to drop her off. That left Harry and I alone in the house.

"You're amazing, you know that, right?" he grinned at me after he got right on top of me on the couch. I laid down comfortably as he kept himself up with his arms first then completely let go of his posture and sunk onto me. He hid his face in my neck and his soft lips kissed my skin a few times.

"I try my best," I giggled with my fingers in his hair and my right leg hooked over his. A quiet hum left my lips when Harry began to press kisses on my neck and carried onto my throat and chin. My arms crossed behind his neck as I felt the palm of his hands behind my back and I smiled when his nose nudged mine. His lips ghosted over mine but he never actually kissed me. I whimpered at the stroke of his lips against mine and he let out a breathy chuckle at my desperation. "Kiss me," I mumbled and pushed my lips closer to his – but he pulled back.

"I love you," he whispered and pressed his mouth to the corner of mine. A shaky breath left my lips as I enjoyed his gentle gestures but I wanted a kiss. I really did. My lips tingled a little at the contact it craved but was denied.

Harry dragged the tip of his nose along my cheek and chin then gave me more of his little kisses. He was being very affectionate and I couldn't find a reason as to why – not that he ever needed a reason to butter up to me. He had these sudden moments where he just felt like being cheesy and even though I found them cringey at the start, it kind of grew on me. It felt nice to be like that with him. Sometimes, I needed it.

"You are so special to me. I want to take you somewhere special for our honeymoon," he told me with a soft smile on his lips. I got lost in his eyes after a while of just looking at him. His lashes were so long and he had so many of them, his eyebrows were bushy but still looked neat. His skin was clear and it felt soft under the pad of my index finger as I delicately ran it down between his eyebrows and along the bridge of his nose. "I've been thinking about something..."

"Yeah?" I asked quietly. I slowly dragged my finger over his skin under his eye and on top of his cheek as I felt him look at me but I kept my gaze on the part of his face where my pointer was. "What about?"

"Just stuff..." he dragged it out and I smiled. It definitely had to be something he was nervous about, perhaps he felt a little scared I wouldn't like whatever homed in his thoughts.

"Interesting," I mumbled and I caught him smile at me shyly. I cupped his cheek and ran my hand along his face, the light stubble scratched my skin. "I've been thinking about something, too."

"Have you now?" he giggled. "Tell me more."

"You go first."

"Ladies first," he bickered.

"So, you go first," I grinned at him and he laughed. "Go on. I wanna know what's going on in your head."

"Just stuff..."

"Mate, you said that already."

"Quit friend zoning me," he pouted. "I'm your damn fiancé."

"But you are also my best mate," I said. He couldn't argue over that because he knew that was true. "Anyway. Tell me what you were going to."

"Well. I know that a lot of things have been happening. With you. And me. Separately. Work-wise. Also, we have this wedding, which I also thought about."

"Right..."

"Um, you know how you mentioned before that you'd be more than happy to stay engaged for longer?" I hummed in response. "I dwelled over that a little and I wouldn't mind that, either."

"You want to postpone the wedding?" I asked. Harry hesitantly nodded and waited for my reaction. "Yeah. There's nothing wrong with that. I'm fine with not getting married right away. I mean, we've only been engaged for a couple of months. There are couples who stay engaged for longer. Years, even."

"I don't want to wait years but I quite enjoy you being my fiancé, you know. Of course, I can't wait to call you my wife – not that I don't do that now – but I think people... they kind of rush into the wedding, you know," he explained. "We have the money and the time so I just feel like we don't have to get married right away. I think this whole topic stressed me out so much because I felt like I couldn't give it all the attention I wanted and it needed. It felt like a burden almost and then the thought of that made me feel guilty. So, all these negative emotions were eating away at me and I didn't like that."

"I'm sorry you felt that way," I responded genuinely as my fingers ran through his hair gently. "I'm more than happy to let go of it for a while. At least until we're both a bit less busy, have more time to actually sit together and think of what we really want. At times, it felt like our mums were putting their dream wedding together," I told him and he chuckled.

"Yeah, I suppose that is what's happening," he agreed. "Mum texted me the other day and told me how I shouldn't wear a custom-made suit, but something more... traditional. She really tried to lock me down to having a simple black blazer."

"See, I didn't even have any idea that you wanted to wear something other than black. I mean, it did cross my mind but I didn't know whether you actually would or not," I explained. "Now that I also think about it, all the dresses I tried on were thrown at me from different people with different taste – their taste. I think I was too stressed to even get a word in so I just swallowed whatever was given."

"We are easy to manipulate when we're stressed," he remarked. "But saying all of that – how we should wait and stuff until we're less busy – I kind of thought about how we should move. The penthouse is getting a little too crowded for us."

"I love the penthouse," I pouted. I really did love it. It felt like my home. When I thought of home, that place came to mind. I grew attached to it and I didn't want to leave it. But he was sort of right. It was a damn mess. We barely could manage.

"I know you do, baby," he said. "I do, too. But it's just not enough anymore. It's basically a one-bedroom apartment, considering that we just toss anything and everything in what was meant to be an office. Not to mention that we have more and more clothes and even though it's a walk-in wardrobe, it's stuffed. I'm pretty sure at some point, I began to wear your socks because they ended up in my drawers."

"Yeah, you're right," I agreed. "We are running out of space, that's for sure. I don't even know how you managed to get the building owner to give you another spot for my car. You already have four cars of your own and then one of mine. That's so many."

"Right. So, that was another thing. I'm probably gonna get more cars eventually. I assume you might want a new one. We just need the space, you know."

"I know."

"And like... kids. I know we won't have any anytime soon but I'm thinking of a house you know. Somewhere we can move into and if they happen to come then they'll have somewhere to come home to. And when family visits – if Lily wants to spend some time in London or Harrison. We'd need a couple of guest bedrooms, too," he went on about his ideas. The sound of them all made me excited and I wanted to get to house hunting right away.

"I really want to have babies with you," I told him quietly. His eyes widened and a massive grin spread across his lips. I chuckled as he leaned closer in and kissed me and then hid his face in the crook of my neck as he hugged me tightly. I didn't think that would make him so happy, especially because this wasn't the first time I told him I wanted to have kids with him.

"Can we?" he asked me with hopeful eyes and voice. He sat up a little, his hair messy. "Can we try for a baby? Please. I really want to have a little you or me or a mixture of us running around and imagine just living in our new home with a baby and I could give them all my time and oh my god. I could replan my ideas and make a baby line with Gucci and those could match my original ideas-, baby, please."

"Harry," I laughed as I sat up and placed my hands on his cheeks and stroked them with my thumbs. His eyes looked all over my face as I focused just on them, my left leg bent as my right one hung off the couch. "Baby, I would. I want that. All of that. Even the matching outfits. But we can't – not right now."

"Why?" he asked, his voice cracked. "We have the money. I love you. You love me. We could easily find a gorgeous home. We're about to get married."

"Harry..." I sighed as my hands dropped to my lap. I twisted the engagement ring around my finger until he stopped my movement and linked our fingers together. "I don't want a baby yet. I mean I do. But I can't have one yet, you know. I'm twenty-two, twenty-three soon... I have so much time. I-, I want to travel more. I want to work more – dance more. I couldn't do that with a baby growing in me, it would stop me from so much. I-, Harry," I called after him when he got up and walked out of the living room.

A loud sigh left my lips as I didn't even bother going after him. How did he not understand what I was on about? Why did he feel... threatened by what I said? I didn't state that I didn't want kids at all... I said I didn't want them now. My job was so different compared to his. He didn't do anything physical whereas my job only consisted of that. He also wasn't the one carrying the damn human.

I closed my eyes as I leaned back on the couch and wrapped my arms over my face. I knew I wasn't wrong. He reacted the wrong way. I thought he would have understood seeing as he was always the more mature one in our relationship, not just because he was older than me. But then when we had silly arguments like this, I've been proved otherwise.

Not even five minutes later, I heard the main door opening and chattering filled the house. It sounded like Anne and it seemed to be Lucas. I sat up just before they entered the living room and stood up to greet the oldest Styles sibling.

"I had no idea you were coming," he laughed after we hugged and I did the same. "Where's Harry?"

"Yeah, it was a surprise," I answered. "And I'm not sure. Might be looking for food or something."

"Wouldn't be surprised," he smiled. "You look great, by the way. Seems like London is treating you good, eh?"

"Thank you," I chuckled. "Guess it's the engagement glow," I shrugged. "How have you been, then? How's the girlfriend?"

"She's – we're good, yeah," he nodded as we sat down. Anne disappeared into the kitchen I assumed. "She's busy with work and stuff, I'm kind of just being lazy right now."

"Wish I could say the same," I huffed. I had so many classes scheduled after one another, I had no idea how I was going to make time for anything. "I love it though so I guess that makes up for it."

Lucas' attention moved to the door where Harry walked through. He walked closer to his brother who stood up and they shook hands then hugged.

"You okay?" Lucas asked Harry as he walked past me and pressed a kiss on the top of my head.

"Yeah. Need to call Caitlin though so I'll be upstairs," he told us and then left right away.

"Is he okay?" Lucas asked me after and I shrugged. "Did you two have a fight or something?"

"Misunderstanding," I mumbled. "It was a misunderstanding."

"Right," he nodded. "Go, talk to him about it. Unless, he really has a phone call to make."

"He is the one in the wrong – kind of. He needs to come to me."

"I see," he chuckled. "Well, in that case, let's go see what mum's doing. I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

And so, we ended up making food with Anne. We were the assistants and Anne was the chef. It was so much fun to spend some time with them because we had the chance to bond a little more. In general, I always felt left out so including myself in things was rather hard but I did try my best.

Just as we were done with the food, Anne had to leave to pick Lily up so that left Lucas and I to pack things away. Harry still didn't make an appearance and it had been hours since he went upstairs. It bothered me that he got so upset over our argument, which wasn't even a legit argument. He just got mad over something that he really shouldn't have.

"Hey," Lucas called and I hummed in response as I put away the things from the dishwasher. "Go and talk to him. Get him down to eat."

"Maybe I should," I replied even though I knew I shouldn't. I didn't do anything wrong.

It had taken me two tries to get Harry's bedroom right and when I did, I found him sound asleep on his stomach. He laid on the bed horizontally with his feet hanging off at the end. His shoes fell off but he still had the same clothes on.

Carefully, I laid down on the bed next to him and propped my elbow up so I could hold my head up with my hand. He scrunched his nose up and he let out a big sigh, the air out through his nose. Softly, I stroked his cheek but it was enough to make him flutter his eyes open.

"I-, I fell asleep," he mumbled in his husky and croaky voice and a smile tugged on my lips as I blinked and let my hand fall on the mattress. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," I whispered as I adored him. He was truly beautiful. No one like I have ever seen before. I had so much love for him, my heart sometimes felt like it could burst and it overwhelmed me greatly. "You know... before..."

Harry huffed as he turned on his back and sat up. He pushed his hand through his hair and then leaned back on them, his head leaned against his shoulder.

"I know you don't want a family. It's okay," he said emotionlessly. I laid on my back and crossed my ankles then crossed my fingers on my stomach. "I overreacted, I'm sorry."

"Stop saying that just because you think that's what I wanna hear," I mumbled. I wasn't trying to pick a fight, I just wanted to clear the air between us. "If you don't mean it, don't say it."

"Look, I get where you are coming from and I am sorry for being a dick before. I walked off because I would have said hurtful things. I know I would have."

"Did you... you know, really had to call Caitlin?"

"No," he chuckled. "I just needed to get out of there. Mum would have sensed my stand off-ish behaviour and I wasn't feeling up to explaining myself."

"Right," I replied which ended the conversation. He apologised and that was fine. Like I told Lucas, it was a misunderstanding and nothing more. "Well then," I sat up and put my left hand on Harry's thigh as I pushed myself up. "Let's go downstairs. Food's ready."

"Wait. Hold on," he sighed and reached forward until his fingers delicately wrapped around my wrist. He tugged on my arm and I tipped closer to him which made it easy for him to pull me down onto his lap. My eyebrows snapped together in slight confusion as he embraced me in a warm hug. "We're good, yeah?"

"That's a question I should be asking you," I chuckled whilst my left arm snuck around his neck and I intertwined my fingers as my hand hung down his shoulder. Harry bit down on his bottom lip and looked down, his long lashes on full show. A few seconds later, he leaned his head on my chest and pulled me closer to him as he always did. I came to learn the fact that whenever something went wrong, he became just a little bit more affectionate.

"We are good."

"Then we are good," I chuckled. Harry grinned and pressed his lips against mine in a chaste kiss.

•••

ehhh the end coulda been better but i thought this fight between them was really fucking silly anyway so i didn't wanna drag it out more lol

also i'd like to thank u all for being so patient with me and the shitty update schedule this book has cos i know just how annoying it is when a book i'm reading never gets updated :/

i promise there's a bit of a storm coming tho so hopefully the content will make up for me updating twice a month lmfao