" I'm sorry I know it's late but I was wondering if Joanna was still awake?" I ask Joanna's mother.

"Yeah, let me go check. Come in make yourself at home." She said I walk in standing at the bottom of the stairs. Seconds later she comes back down. " Yeah he's still awake, you can go up."

"Thank you, I shouldn't be long," I say.

" Don't worry, you're a good girl." She says I go up knocking on his door.

" May I come in?" I ask through his door knocking first.

"Yeah." He says I open the door leaving it half way open.

" Hey sorry, I just got a phone and you were the only person close by. I got it started but I don't know what to do. I know this is a stupid reason to be here." I say taking my phone from my pocket.

" No no it's fine, come here." He says as he puts down his phone and sits up. I hand him my phone, he pats his hand on his bed. " Sit, I'll explain the gadgets." I sit next to him, my own private thoughts made me blush, a Joanna looking my way made me blush. " Are you okay? You're a little pink..." He asks.

" Yeah, I'm fine. It's a little cold outside and it was warm in here. I'm bad with the quickly changing weather." I say the first thing that comes into my head. His eyes looked puffy like he's been crying, his eyes looked so sad. "A-Are you alright?"

"Yeah why do you ask?" He asks.

" Your eyes... their so sad..." I say, getting a bit close to him staring into his eyes. His eyes showed the kind of gentle concern my grandfather used to have. He laid his hand lightly on my shoulder, and instead of flinching like I usually did, it soothed me.

"I'm okay, I promise..." He says as he takes his hand off me and he grabs his phone. He looks back and forth between the two phones. " There, I have your number and you have yours."

"Oh, thank you. Thanks for everything. I should go, it's getting late you need your sleep and I have to get home before my mom brings another man home." I say getting up.

" Another man?" he asks.

"Someone from the bar. It's fine, I'm perfectly safe." I say trying to reassure him.

" I think it would be better if you stayed here." He says grabbing my hand, his hand was so soft like my hand was held by a soft heating blanket.

" No I really should get going." Trying to loosen his grip, so soft but so controlling. He looks at me with sad eyes again. "Joanna..." He slowly and pulled me closer to him wrapping his arms around me. His embrace was warm, and his big, strong arms seemed very protective when wrapped around my frail body. His silence was somehow comforting and spoke for itself, it was peaceful in a way where you could feel at home and know that no matter what was happening.

"Jakie... It's over... I never knew it would hurt this much..." He says, all I could do was listen. " I was happy, but I guess she wasn't happy with me... What did I do wrong...?"

" Don't blame yourself... There is nothing else you can do.... I will be here for you... I'm sorry that's all I can do." I can say a few words, I run my hand down his arm, I couldn't bare the sight of hid face right now. I felt a hot breath on my neck, then the tender brush of lips. Burning as they make contact with my neck. A hand runs through my hair, as the kisses become harder and more urgent. His kisses are now on my shoulders and in my hair. "Nah~ s-s-stop..." I say in a tender voice. I manage to break free from his grip, I stand up looking at him. My uneven breaths, my emotions all scrambled up.

" I'm sorry..." Joanna says looking up at me, his eyes widen stunned by his actions.

" It's okay. I have gained feelings for you but I'm sorry I can't express them now. But, I am here for you..." I kiss his forehead and leave. What was I thinking? I plop on my bed feeling where his kisses were, remembering his warmth. How he held me, how he held my hand. I could feel the heat growing in my cheeks, my heart begins thumping violently. I hear a sudden ringing, it surprises me, I read the text.

' I'm really sorry.'

' It's okay, don't worry. Get some sleep. See you Monday.' I answer.

'See you Monday.' he replies. I lay there, snuggled up in my sheets waiting for myself to slowly fall asleep.

The bunsen burner was a burnished silver and far larger than any I'd ever seen before, the flame a brilliant blue and strong. I reached over to turn the base, to feed it with oxygen. At once the fire became golden and took the shape of a flower head. I watched the many petals became more distinct, folding outward, radiating light and warmth. It was quite the most beautiful flower I'd ever seen, more transitory than any other, yet eternal in my mind.

Slowly and reluctantly, I uncover my face. I blink, close my eyes, and blink again. Streaks of sunlight penetrate the window and blind me. I sit up, drag my feet off the bed, and rub my knuckles onto my eyes. I stretch my arms above my head and yawn. The knock came from my door then there was silence. I look towards the door wondering who it was.

" Who is it?" I say listening to who it was.

" Mom..." I open the door. She was an alcoholic. Years of alcohol abuse had left his cheeks rosy and her mind dull-witted. She knew drying out would be a painful process and she had no intention of ever going through it. She was determined to stay drunk until she died. " I'm going to a rehab clinic." I'm surprised by her words; shill sleepy I give a strange look.