Dark Link had sobered up a bit, but was plagued with a dull throbbing in his brain. The shade massaged that spot on his head and looked up, blowing away a strand of snowy hair from his face.

"Mmmk... Where am I...?"

Almost instinctively, his other hand snapped up and clamped over his head. His hat was still there - albeit slightly lopsided over his head. He recognised the texture rubbing against his fingers.

Weak light shone past him from a keyhole. Was he locked up inside some kind of cupboard? The last thing he remembered was trying to erase the image of Jeff's pale buttocks from his mind.

Dark Link curiously reached towards the keyhole and braced his hand against something he correctly assumed to be the closet's door. With a halfhearted push, it creaked open with little protest.

He swung his legs over the closet's edge and dropped down to the floor. It had been one of those overhead closets - therefore he had quite some distance to cover.

His landing was careful and controlled. His heels buckled, but he straightened himself up before he could fall backwards and crack his skull against the cupboard he'd just escaped from.

Thinking rationally, Dark Link randomly span on his heel and walked in the first direction he could think of. No matter which way he went, he was bound to end up in the kitchen sooner or later, right?

Right.

Five - or fifteen, depending on your source - minutes later, Dark Link found himself stumbling woozily into the kitchen. By then, all he wanted was an ice pack for his head and a slice of lemon to suck on.

The desire for a slice of lemon will not and never will be explained by the author, primarily because she doesn't even know what the hell her sleep-deprived mind is writing right now.

As we've established before, all Dark Link wanted was some things from the fridge. What he didn't want was to be thrown headfirst into a loud, heated argument. Which, of course, was exactly what happened.

Smirky and Kagekao were both standing up with their hands pressed firmly on the tabletop, hurling insults and comebacks at each other faster than a debate team on New Years.

"Absurd creature! You were such a failure - not even the vultures would want your soulless carcass!"

"Rainbow-eyed freak! Kekeke!" Kagekao said in a sing-song voice, then burst into a very rude song that the author won't even name due to the great threat to her precious rating.

Smirky looked taken aback, then snapped into reality when his face flushed with anger. He took a cold swipe at the giggly creepypasta, frustratedly snapping at him with his teeth.

Kagekao jumped up, straight out of his seat. The black and white creepypasta stood on his clawed hands, kicking up in the air.

He bent his legs downwards to deliver a strong kick straight to Smirky's head. The onlookers (Dark Link and Ticci Toby) thought that his flexibility was increepypasta, though they did note how his joints clicked.

Insanely, Smirky disappeared. One moment he was there, the next he was gone.

"An illusion? You insult my prowess....!"

With a snappy sort of clicky sound, Kagekao flipped head-over-heels and curled himself around the empty chair to steady himself on his way down.

"You come out and face me, won't you? We defend our honours, do we not? Kekeke~"

Dark Link hastily flattened himself against the wall. Toby gave a yelp of alarm and dived behind the toaster. Somehow. To he honest, he kinda cowered behind it and tried to disguise himself as a giant waffle.

Darkness glanced at Toby, the fridge, then Toby again. A lightbulb clicked over his head. He grabbed the ticci creepypasta and hastily stuffed him into the freezer, along with some waffles.

Then he crawled into the fridge and yanked the door shut, effectively using the refrigerator as a shield. Yes, the wine was still filtering through his system at the time.

Kagekao scuttled across the floor on all fours. His hands and feet both had the sharpest claws, that scratched on the smooth tiles continuously.

Smirky quietly stood on his tiptoes, hidden in the shadow of the refrigerator that Darkness and Toby were hiding it.

It was a very confusing matter. Were creepypastas just naturally attracted towards fridges? Such a prying question that had no answer and if you ask me, they should've made some kind of scientific study towards it to test the theory, preferably by utilzing BEN and a carrot stick.

Yes, Phantom did add that nonsensical text to bump up her word count by about fifty. She's making a habit of doing this. And yes, she's referring to herself in third person, which is kinda neat.

She's also going to swivel the spotlight towards Smirky and finally let everyone know what he was thinking during all this. Better grab your popcorn. It's interesting.

The illusionist creepypasta peeked around the fridge. He drew in shallow breaths, trying not to let it hitch in his throat while his lungs demanded more.

He could visualise some pages of Kagekao's file hovering in front of him, though it was restricted to the confines of his mind.

Inside the fridge, Toby started ticcing violently. For you see, in the compartment below, Dark Link had accidently elbowed the temperature gauge and set it somewhere in the minus range. Well, further into it.

The result of all this ticcing was the fridge starting to subtly shake. Let's all take a moment to visualize this moment and situation. Thoroughly. Got it? Good job.

Kagekao's highest skills are speed and agility. He holds a record for his flexibility and can outrun Phantom's dachshund. Smirky stepped back and straightened up against the fridge in a flash.

He doesn't kill fast - he likes letting prey know that they're being watched and he doesn't mind waiting.
Good. Then I can take my time.

He stepped forward and pretended to look naïvely around the kitchen again. He crafted feigned reactions to anything that seemed out of the ordinary, making it seem like he was bubbling with apprehension.

For good measure, he pressed a hand firmly against the fridge and braced himself against it. In reality, he was bracing himself to move at a moment's notice; for even the lightest whirl of wind on the nape of his neck.

The fridge gave off deep and heavy vibrations, rattling the icy blood that froze uncomfortably inside his wrist's veins. Figuratively speaking, of course.

Toby had opened an ice cream tub that he'd found stuffed behind an ancient packet of peas and started eating it with a waffle, since he didn't have a spoon.

He was causing the whole refrigerator to shake and vibrate so - because of how cold he was. But he couldn't feel that at all, so he had no idea and kept munching on happily and obliviously.

Dark Link thought that they were having some kind of earthquake, or maybe that the squabbling fight between those two creepypastas had suddenly taken a turn for the crazy.

Smirky wouldn't let his mind drift astray like his author's was currently doing with the whole Ticci Toby and shaky fridge affair.

He moved into plain sight again. The clingy shadows released him and melted away, falling subject to the kitchen lamp's soft light.

All of Kagekao's abilities rely on the aspect of surprise. Keeping track of his movements will help beat him. At this moment, he's still waiting for me to turn around.

The illusionist creepypasta moved stiffly, trying to imitate the gait of someone who was feeling incredibly uneasy.

He didn't make full movements - took his time with examining the kitchen's hiding places. No cupboard was left unopened.

He even poked his head inside the freezer for a brief moment. Of course, most of it was occupied by Toby, but Smirky ignored that fact.

As he ran his hand over one of the kitchen's slippery countertops, he couldn't help but marvel at how Kagekao was synchronising his own steps perfectly. It was a spectral performance.

He's planning to surprise me.
But what is there to do about it?

Dark Link scrambled to turn down the freezer's thermostat when he realised how high it was climbing. He bumped his forehead into a compartment's open button and was pelted by a waterfall of macaroni.

"Wh-When did BEN install a macaroni compartment?!"

"He- He s-saw a-a D-DIY t-t-tutorial a-about it o-on Youtube!" Came Toby's muffled, slightly chattery voice from above.

Moving back to the outer walls of the refrigerator, things were certainly moving faster indeed.

Smirky froze when he heard a telltale crack of clicky joints.

He had a faster start than Kagekao did, and was able to avoid a fatal blow to his back and-

Wham!

Twisted himself around and lashed out with a kick, catching him in the jaw.

The white side of Kagekao's mask twisted into a fierce scowl. "Ke... ke... ke... ke... Let's play!"

In that fleeing moment when Smirky was bringing his leg down after the kick, the black and white creepypasta made his move.

He pounced, throwing his whole weight forward to successfully knock him off his feet and to the floor. In a flash of movement, Kagekao rolled on top of him, the black side of his mask giving a happy smile.

"No escape for you!"

Kagekao was fully extending his claws. Smirky made a comment, something along the lines of:

"I've heard that the dog salon is having a special sale on nail trims. Maybe you should see if they can cut yours down to size - I'll even give you one of Smile Dog's redeemable coupons."

The aforementioned claws were now wrapping dangerously close to his neck, sailing straight through his flesh as if it was no big deal. "Words won't challenge me, dearest friend. You have no luck~"

"Don't I?"

Smirky yanked down hard on the stripy scarf that he'd been so slyly winding around his arm. Caught off guard, his opponent fell on his side, wheezing out a choked cough.

The illusionist creepypasta sprang back to his feet as soon as remotely possible, and scooted away to put some distance between them.

With his back to the counter, he massaged his throat. It had been squeezed like a sponge - he was lucky to have gotten off with no damage other than a mild discomfort.

"DiD yOu rEaLLy cOmE aLL tHe WaY hErE tO kiLL mE?"

Kagekao responded with a little sigh, rolling on his back and lying sprawled out on the floor. He simply looked too tired to bother moving. But he did tilt his head to meet Smirky's eyes.

"T'was all in fun... T'was all in fun."

"I HAte fun."

Dark Link pushed open the fridge door and clawed his way to freedom, tumbling out along with a pile of macaroni. "What happened? Earthquake?"

Then Toby came sliding out of the freezer. Literally. He'd been frozen solid, save for his eyes darting frantically left and right from behind his frosty goggles.

Smirky let his arms hang loosely at his sides. Walked past both of them and tactfully stepped around Kagekao. "It was just a squabble."

We were both ready for a full blown-fight...

The illusionist creepypasta glided up the staircase, raking a hand over his head to comb back any hair that looked out of place. "I'm going to sleep now."

"But it's only two in the morning! Nobody goes to sleep that early...."

Dark Link trailed off as Toby started giggling uncontrollably, pointing at the floor, which made him turn around and look too.

Kagekao was still lying there, but now he was treating one of his hands as a pillow, resting with it tucked under his head. His breathing was slow and steady. "Zzzzz..."

"... What in the name of Zalgo is going on around here?" Dark Link voiced aloud. Mentally, he sounded a lot more pleased. Since they're both sleeping, I can report this to Slenderman without hassle....

_________________________
A/N: Kagekao's is my favourite creepypasta story out of them all!
And amazingly, we've reached one hundred and fifty reads! Wow! Can we hit 170 next? I'm so happy!
I've written this chapter while sleep deprived, so you can blame anything strange or nonsensical on that.
Thank you for reading!

Toodle-doo!
Final Word Count: 2072.