Back at the mansion, a state of emergency was taking flight. 

BEN had been only too happy to go running like a lunatic, mimicking a wailing siren with disturbing accuracy.

"-CODE RED! WE HAVE A CODE RED! CODDDDEEEE REEEEED!"

For you see, Zalgo wasn't the only one who was into espionage. In an ironic twist of fate, Slenderman had returned the favour by bugging his whole lair.

The faceless creepypasta had witnessed everything. Everything.

"CODE RED! THIS IS NOT A DRILL; COOODEEEE REEEEED! DANGER! DANGER! WE'RE ALL IN DANGER!"

Jeff – who'd been freed from the closet by Dark Link – opened his bedroom door by a crack to lob a knife at the little elf as he passed by, yelling some colourful words of his own.

"-GO. TO. SLEEP! IT'S FOUR IN THE MORNING, YOU YUM-YUM OBSESSED TWERKAHOLIC MIDGET!"

Dark Link was much more punctual about the situation, and shouldered his door open whilst both hands were preoccupied with drawing his sword from its sheath.

"Where's the enemy?"

"EVERYONE FOLLOW MEEEEEEEEEE!" BEN was having far too much fun with waking everyone up.

Jane came stalking from 'round a corner with a gruesome case of bed hair, and a knife.

"This'd better be important..." She grumbled.

It wasn't light outside yet – the skies were dark and cloudless. High wind rustled through the trees, silhouettes of leaves flashing past the windows.

BEN hopped the stairs two at a time, cupping his hands over his mouth for further effect, screaming his warnings over and over with the strength of a banshee.

Doors opened simultaneously.

Some creepypastas had their weapons at hand, some were still in pyjamas, others were back from a night of killing and cranky as hell.

Except Jeff. He was just grouchy over losing a kidney.

Like birds flocking to a feeder (which is a terrible metaphor - don't ever use it), everyone eventually wound up in the study, as per protocol.

Unfortunately, protocol mentioned nothing about how much space a dozen creepypastas could hog between themselves.

Toby and Masky were squashed together in a corner, E.J sat on top of the bookcase (next to Jeff), Dark Link and Sally were lucky enough to snag seats, etc.

Slenderman sat behind his desk as always, fingers laced together his tentacles doing some sort of hokey pokey dance.

One scene of interest was a squad of mini rubber duckies sitting on his aforementioned desk.

That's right.

Ducky's spawn lived on.

And just in case you were wondering, yes. They did all have names. Names named after the cast of Twilight. It appeared Smile Dog had taken a nibble of Victoria.

"You declared a state of emergency?" Dark Link pressed, leaning forward to meet face-to-faceless-face with Slendy.

"Yes, child. It seems Zalgo's been up to no good yet again."

Jeff interjected himself into the conversation. "-Bah! Did you really interrupt my beauty sleep for this? That's not an emergency; it's a daily occurrence!"

E.J was just staring intently at the crazy killer, or more specifically the place where his kidneys were.

The cannibal was also sniffing. Audibly. He was picking up on the scent of lunch's other half.

... Yummy.

Slenderman sighed and put on a voice of authority. This was his way of trying to sound patient.

"He's gone a little too far with this specific plan, so we need to take prompt action before-"

"-But it's not like we're being invaded; this could've waited until tomorrow!" Jeff continued with protest in his tone, unaware that E.J was starting to sniff him like a curious hound.

Jane helpfully shut him up with a discreetly thrown rubber ducky, which was dodged out of sheer luck and experience. Poor Jacob.

Slenderman's patience was wearing thin, so he squeezed one of the other rubber duckies to relieve some tension. Poor Sam.

"Smirky and Kagekao have both infiltrated our defences. They stole some very important things and returned to Zalgo's lair."

"Like what?" Masky challenged, finally untangling himself from the twitching ragdoll that was a sleep-deprived Toby.

"Important, extremely sensitive documents containing top secret information on all of us. And Doctor Smiley."

... A moment of silence. And then, "Oh? So they took Smiley's info too?"

"No. They took the documents, and Smiley."

There was an immediate uproar, especially from Jeff.

"What do you mean, AND SMILEY? WE DON'T HAVE ANY OTHER DOCTORS!"

"Yes, I know that chi-"

"-And he's the only one who knows the fridge lock's combination!" BEN added with a despaired wail.

A vinyl record screeched to a halt.

"Wait, what?!"

"He got sick and tired of going out to buy groceries so he put a 'pasta-proof lock on the refrigerator door!" BEN sobbed, throwing himself to the floor out of anguish.

Pregnant pause....

"WE'RE GOING TO STARVE!" Jeff screamed, fainting on the spot.

He toppled off the bookcase and faceplanted onto poor Dark Link (who couldn't get out of his way in time.)

On the bright side, the killer did unwittingly avoid getting his remaining kidney cut out by E.J, who'd taken out a scalpel and been prepared to harvest it in a delusory state of sleepy.

Slenderman did an internal faceless facepalm, then addressed the rest of them, trying to keep peace. "Calm down children, it's not the end of-"

"IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!" BEN wailed, clutching his chest and collapsing to the floor.

He started foaming at the mouth like a rabid squirrel.

"Riiight..." Jane hesitantly stepped over the self-asphyxiating midget. "So what should we do?"

Well, first they had to do something about BEN before he actually asphyxiated.

That's the story of how Dark Link ended up rocking BEN DROWNED to sleep, in his arms, like a little baby - reluctantly humming nursery rhymes about blood and death all the way.

Darkness looked miserable.

BEN slept happy.

Meanwhile, action was taking place. And no, not that kind of action. Get those thoughts out of yo head, pal!

Slenderman sent Smile Dog practically galloping out of the mansion with a messenger bag, tasking the demonic hound to 'spread the word' to their comrades.

Sonic.exe ran past, over the hills and out of sight. He'd been told to visit the nearest supermarket and bring back some sort of rations to settle ' idiotic' worries.

No one thought about specifically whom they were sending on this errand.

As a result their rescue efforts would actually have to speed up - lest they wanted to survive on nothing but frozen hotdogs for the next week or so.

Jeff was laid to rest on a rug.

Which soon got mysteriously rolled up and thrown out of a nearby window.

A poker-faced Jane swore that she'd seen it levitate or "some freaky voodoo s*** like that."

Slenderman didn't have time to concern himself with trivial matters like an occupant being tossed into their swimming pool.

Drowning was for ghosts of Cyens'.

If you know Cyen's original name, you'll get this joke.

Anydoodles, moving back to the plotline, defences were being amped up and everyone was now required to give a codeword at the entrance.

In addition to that, Dark Link was on guard duty outside.

Sitting nicely on a chair with crossed legs and a sword resting over his shoulder, he looked like a force that ought not be reckoned with.

The gate was guarded, the front door was secure, the mansion's spiky walls suddenly came in handy, and all residents were on full alert.

So surely the creepypastas could hold their own against any more kidnappings until Smile Dog and Sonic.exe arrived with reinforcements and rations respectfully, right?

Oh boy, they were wrong.

_____________________
A/N: This author's note is brought to you by the twerking awareness foundation. :3

Okay, I lied. It's not.

Question of le dachshund: If you were to get kidnapped by any creepypasta, who would kidnap you and why?

I'd probably get kidnapped by Smirky and interrogated about the whereabouts of Houdini. Heh, heh, heh... Just for the record, I know nothin'! Ya here me? Nothin'!

Anydoodles, how did this chapter go in your opinion? Is the plotline getting thicker? Are you interested, amused or asleep? You know how much I love feedback. > v <

Thank you all for the precious 2K views; I'm shocked we've made it this far! We're a couple of hundred away from 3K... WHOOP, WHOOP!

Let's spread the word with plenty of votes, comments and reading list adds! XD
*shamelessly crosses fingers*

Toodle-Doo!
Final Word Count: 1418.