Two Years Ago...

After helping me into his house earlier today, Noah had sat me down on the sofa to relax. The fear and confusion in his eyes were as clear as day. He didn't ask any questions until after he had gathered a few things for me: a large bowl, a blanket, and some medications. I refused the medication due to the fact that I have no idea what medicines are safe for me to take during my pregnancy.

Noah paces about his living room, his hands shuffling through his hair every few moments or so. I had stopped throwing up a little while ago and took a short nap. When I woke up, I had some explaining to do, and I know that.

"Will you sit down already? God, your pacing really isn't helping," I say, my voice croaking.

"What do you expect me to do?" He snaps. I draw back into the sofa and curl my legs up to my chest, my meek little self clearly illustrated. His face calms as he releases a quick yet deep sigh. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you like that."

I wrap my arms around my legs, tucking them in closet. "You don't have anything to be sorry for," I say as my eyes turn away. "But I'm sorry about your porch."

He lets out a light chuckle. "Don't worry about it. The porch is the least of my worries."

"Maybe for you. God, I feel so embarrassed." I let my head fall into my arms as my body shapes into a ball on the couch.

I soon feel a cold hand touch my arm, followed by a calming voice. "Trust me, Nyc. You have nothing to feel embarrassed about. Believe me, I've hurled in places much worse," he jokes.

I lift my head up to eye him. "I just puked all over my neighbor's porch. There might be a record in play here." Trying to smile, I shoot up and grab the bowl Noah had fetched for me. My eyes squeeze shut as I prepare for another round of bile. Noah holds back my hair as his other hand dances in circles on my back. Luckily, it's a false alarm, and I lean my body backwards and into the pillow on the couch.

Noah goes to sit at the other end of the couch, my bare toes touching his leg. "Do you want me to call your parents?"

I warily shake my head. "No. No, they can't know what's going on."

"Okay, what about your brothers?" He asks.

"No. No one can know."

His eyes turn stern and that comforting smile dissipates from his face as quickly as smoke. My hands go numb. "Rowen, what is going on?" He awaits me answer but I don't speak. "And don't you dare say nothing, because we both know that it's something."

I slowly sit up, my stomach groaning with exhaustion and hunger, and I look Noah in the eye. "What I'm about to tell you can never get out. No one else knows, and it needs to stay that way."

"Nyc, you can trust me. Whatever it is that you're hiding, it will never leave my mouth."

My breathing deepens and I turn my head away from him. When he hears this, I won't be able to look him in the eye. The shame is enough for me to bare, but not the disappointment that will light in his eyes. With a heavy heart, I breathe, "I'm pregnant."

Even though I can't see his face, I hear his breathing practically stop.

~~~~~

Monday arrives sooner than I want it too. When I woke up this morning, both of my brothers were furious. I've never been out so late before and I didn't return any of their texts so I couldn't really hold them accountable. I had to come up with some excuse as to why my car wasn't parked in the driveway and I told them that Sam had borrowed it for a night out. Both Caleb and Dylan interrogated me, but I'm pretty confident with my story. Obviously, I didn't tell them about the little adventure to the school last night. They'd take me to jail themselves.

The rest of the weekend though went by in a blur. I was practically under house arrest for a full two days so I barely came out of my room. On Sunday, I got a text from Noah asking to meet me but I completely ignored it and went about my day. After our conversation on Friday, I've had no desire to speak to him, or even text him.

In English class, my mind takes me away from the lesson plan and back to Friday night. Silas had told me that he was never out on a late night walk last Tuesday, meaning that the person I followed was someone else, and I'm mentally slapping myself for my stupidity. How could I follow some random guy to the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night? What even drove me to do that? All these questions perform circus acts inside my mind, and the guy that I presumably stalked is the ringmaster.

Today, Darian is in class, though to my own surprise, he doesn't speak to me once. I guess I can take that as a good thing, but it's strange that he doesn't say anything at all throughout the entire class period.

The bell soon rings, interrupting my contemplation. I gather my bag and all my materials and walk out into the cluster of students swarming the halls. I quickly insert myself in the crowd and head into the direction of my next class. As I'm struggling the get through the mass of teenagers, I catch a familiar glimpse of blond hair standing at a locker; Silas.

I murmur apologies to unknown people as I push my way past them and towards the rows of lockers. When I successfully make it out, I start to wonder why I seem so anxious to talk to him. I only first spoke to him last week and since then, I haven't been able to think about the guy without a disgusting taste flooding my mouth. Now, I feel a bit more comfortable.

I'm just about to approach him when a feminine figure stands in my path, blocking my sight of Silas. "Hey, Rowen," Olivia says with a stuck up sounding voice.

"Can I help you?"

"As a matter of fact, you can." She steps closer to me. "We need to have a little chat."

"God, Olivia, just leave me alone. I'm not in the mood." I try to push past her but she again stands in my way. "You know, I'm trying to get to class."

She grins, her red lips curling on her perfect skin. "Unless you want your new boyfriend knowing about your secret adventures in bed, I strongly suggest that you follow me."

I giggle once. "He's not boyfriend."

"Yeah I don't care," she spats back.

Looking over Olivia's shoulder, I notice Silas' eyes on mine. His grey irises gleam in the light of the hallway, clearly showing confusion. I look back to Olivia and think hard about my escape plan. It's too bad I don't have one. "Lead the way," I say.

Her bright red, coated lips curl into a grin as she leads the way down the hall. I follow her with resilience in my steps, just wanting to turn around and run. My nerves begin to go up in flames, waiting to burn down every cell in my body.

Olivia leads me into the girl's restroom. Before walking in with her, I look around to make sure that no one is watching us or getting a bit too curious. The last thing I need is more people finding out about my mistake. Silas may have shown me kindness when he had an advantage over me, but the same can't be said for her. After years of knowing her, she'll do whatever to get what she wants.

My heart again runs rapid as I open the bathroom door and walk in. Olivia stands in front of a mirror, looking at her reflection lovingly. "Okay, you got me alone. Now what do you want?" I ask, slowly walking toward her with my arms nervously crossed.

She whips around and faces me, a scowl drawn on her face. "That's a pretty pointless question, don't you think? Considering you already know the answer."

I shrug and raise my eyebrows. "Humor me."

"Fine, if that's how you wanna play this." She drops her purse onto the floor of the bathroom. "Let's cut to the chase, shall we? Your little bed buddy told me everything."

I knew this conversation was coming. I just didn't want it to come so soon. But just to test out my luck, I decide to lie and say, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Her devilish expression takes over as her laugh echoes from wall to wall. "Do you really take me for an idiot?" She asks. I'm tempted to say yes. "There's no one around, Rowen. You don't need to lie to me." It was worth the shot.

"Fine, you got me. You happy now?"

She shakes her. "No, not quite. You still have pounds of guts to spill. And a simple confession isn't gonna clean up that mess." Apart of me thinks that this isn't really Olivia speaking. There's always a light and dark side to everything, and her dark side is the portion that's currently in control. It seems it's always in control. "You know, I'm kinda getting a sense of déjà vu. I remember a conversation that began just like this one. Only this time, I'm not gonna be as nice."

My throat runs dry. "Yeah, I remember it too. It's kinda hard to forget."

"Then you remember what you did to me, and how gullible I was to forgive you." She already looks as if she's on the verge of tears, yet fighting vigorously to keep them back. Even so, she turns away with her hands placed firmly upon her hips. Then turning back around, she says, "After what happened between you and Darian, I was willing to give you another chance, and you threw it away like it meant nothing."

"Liv, you know I didn't want to hurt you, but I-"

"Oh don't give me that crap!" Olivia yells. "You were just waiting for the perfect change to strike. And like the snake you are, you sunk your teeth into my boyfriend the minute I turned my back." 

My breath becomes uneven as I try to speak. "I don't know what I can say that will make up for what I did... except that I'm sorry."

Olivia snickers. "Is that the guilt talking or the pity?" She questions me. "I don't care how sorry you are. But you can't keep up your little angel act forever. Sooner or later, I will spill your very dirty secret."

"So why did you want to talk to me then? To gloat?"

"Call it a friendly warning," Olivia replies. I already know where this conversation is heading. History will repeat itself and I'll be under the influence of another blackmail. And I can already see my future flashing in her eyes. "I'd watch my back if I were you. You don't want people finding out about your little... mistake." She eyes my stomach as she says this.

Refusing to give into her poisonous words, I whip my head up and say to her, "So that's your plan? You're gonna tell everyone my deepest, darkest secret? And what was the point of this conversation exactly, besides delivering empty threats?"

Olivia holds her words, her angered gaze screaming at mine as if it might erupt. I'm not afraid of her. She was always all talk and no action. Even to this day, she still doesn't scare me. Her empty words hold no stable grounds. That was always her problem.

After one more moment of uninterrupted silence, her cherry lips finally open. "Enjoy your little fling with loner boy while it lasts," she says. And with that, she brushes past me with sharp strides, exiting the bathroom in a matter of seconds. I hear her raise her voice at someone as she walks out, and I can only hope that it isn't him.

Please don't be him, please don't be him, I think to myself as I too leave the restroom. Unfortunately, my hopes are terminated.

Silas waits for me outside, but I don't stop in my tracks. "What happened in there?" He asks me as I walk by him.

"Nothing happened. It's fine."

"Didn't sound like fine to me," he says, catching up to me.

"So you're back to spying now? I thought we were passed this." I feel his arms rub up against mine as he walks next to me down the hall.

Silas bumps shoulders with another person rushing past him. He doesn't even bother apologizing. "Well whatever Liv said to you, your clearly upset about it."

I sigh loudly out of irritation and pick up my speed. "So what if I am? Why do you even care?" The school bell rings trough the hall and more people rush past us to get to their classes. As usual, I'm not in the mood for going to class, so I go to the one place where I can cook my heels: outside. And of course, Silas follows right behind.

Once he and I are out of the sights of those people, Silas replies, "I care because everything that comes out of her mouth is equivalent to tectonic plates shifting. It only causes chaos."

"This is my chaos to deal with, not yours," I say. The both of us find ourselves outside the building. The sky is darkened with grey clouds, the sun struggling to stay vibrant against the currents of winds.

My pace still quickens but Silas manages to place himself in front of me, putting me at a halt. "Rowen, stop for a minute."

"No, I'm not gonna stop. I'm gonna keep walking until my goddamn feet bleed," I spat, trying to make my way past him. But he will not let me take more than two steps at a time.

As I keep trying to shove past him, he puts his hands up to my shoulders and tries to hold me in place. "Rowen, she is going to get what she deserves. Give it a few more days, a week at the most, and Felix will find something that we can use against her," he tries to assure me.

But I can't let that happen. Olivia made her intentions very clear. She does intend on spilling my secret whether I play along or not, and no one will stand by me after that. Not Taylor, not Sam, not Silas - not even Noah. I can't lose anymore people that I care about. And Silas is one of them. If I don't push him away now, things will only grow more complicated, and I'll be left with nothing.

I look into his eyes, though tears begin to gloss over his image. "It doesn't matter what the hell he finds. None of it does."

His face tenses, a crease holding between his brows, and he takes his hands off my shoulders. "What do you mean? Of course it matters," he says.

"I'm talking about Friday night." He just looks at me as I begin to cave. "I don't know if that whole stunt was just some twisted, elaborate scheme to poke fun at my past, or a way for you to redeem yourself by helping me get past my own guilt, but for whatever reason, it didn't work. I'm still that depressed, quiet girl with a broken family and a sob story that no one wants to hear. You tried helping me, but you just made everything worse, Silas."

He looks at me with such disbelief. "First of all, I never did any of that to make fun of you. I told you what my intentions were." I feel a single tear prance down my cheek. A growl of thunder arose overhead, drowning my voice. Soon it will rain and the land will be soaked, including both Silas and I. He stands in front of me, his eyes demanding more answers. "Where is this coming from?" He asks.

I shake my head probably about a dozen times, struggling to keep my gaze off of Silas. I throw it in multiple directions. Silas won't want to look me in the eye after this. That much is clear. What isn't clear is much hurt I cause.

Other corner of my mind begs me not to hurt him. He's been through enough, just like I have. But if I don't, it'll only hurt him more in the future. If our relationship grew, he would only feel more betrayed in the long run because I didn't trust him with my darkest secret. This needs to happen. But out of nowhere, I cry, "Nevermind, forget it. I'm not having this conversation."

Turning back around, Silas grabs me by the arm. "No, you started this and now you're gonna finish it."

My body turns back around with a strong whip of my hair. "Fine. You want an explanation?" I ask. I take in a breath of the damp air. "Ever since I met you, literally everything in my life began falling apart. You just had to get involved in my life by taking advantage of one little mistake," I say, hating every word. Raindrops begin to collapse from the heavy clouds, small pellets of water grazing my skin as they flow down my face and exposed arms

"I wasn't trying to take advantage of you, Rowen!" He hollers.

"Well you certainly didn't help me, either."

My breathing quickens as my chest heaves up and down in quickened patterns, and I forget how to speak. He almost discovered the truth. He almost found out about my past, the past that I want buried beneath layers of stone and secrecy. I have to tell him off. There's no other choice.

"Rowen, I was trying to help you out of a hole that you couldn't get out of yourself. I thought you knew that," he says. I do know that. I know that more than anything. But I dug my own hole, and I didn't deserve help to climb back out of it.

I stare vulnerably at his figure. "Than you thought wrong."  The rain is now heavier and the sun is no longer visible. Shades of grey stain the past color of blue, that very hue now a collection of storm clouds. Silas' eyes shine with the light of the storm, the silver ever so vibrant. Though now, he appears to be broken. "I don't care that you tried to help me because you didn't. You didn't help me by making me break the law, you didn't help me my blackmailing me, and you aren't helping me now." 

Silas looks at me with mixed sadness and anger, the two sides rivaling on his face. I instantly regret my words and wish that I can take them back. In truth, he has helped me, and yet I threw my anger at him. "You really want to do this? Just... give up?"

"Our deal is done, Silas. I did what you wanted, and now it's over." I look away because I won't be able to face him after this. "There's no other reason why we should have to see one another any time soon."

I can only imagine how he's looking at me. With pain, disgust, anguish - the things a person would see if they were to look at an enemy. Maybe he sees nothing but a stranger, thinking he never knew me in the first place. He'd be right. He doesn't know me, he never did. I made sure of that, and I've never hated myself more.

"You know, I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, and for a few days now, I thought blackmailing you was the best one I ever made," he begins, and I know his next words will be the ones that break me. "Guess I was wrong." He then reaches into the pocket of his jeans and pulls out a set of keys - my car keys - and drops them to the ground. And he walks away.

Those words hold the weight of finality upon them, every letter clinging to me like a child to a mother's breast. "Silas," I dare breath, but there's no answer. Silas is gone, and I'm all alone. The only trace of him is the hardened memory I hold in my sight as I gaze at the spot where he once stood.

The rain now falls heavily, blending with my falling stream of tears. My hair becomes soaked, draping wetly over my shoulders and face. I narrow my head down and stare at the keys lying on the wet grass, raindrops polishing the clean metal.  Tasting the water from my lips, I slowly pick them up. That's the thing about the rain: no one can see my cry.

A/N :

Hurray! Another chapter! I don't know about anyone else, but I really love to hate Olivia.

Will Olivia expose Rowen's secret?
How will Noah react to Rowen's news of her pregnancy?
Will Silas and Rowen find a way to become friends?
Keep reading to find out!

Make sure to click on the pretty little star in the bottom corner if you enjoyed this chapter! And don't forget to leave feedback!

XOXO