Perry

My trips to Intox are becoming more frequent.

I'm there almost every night now and dancing on every surface I can. The staff seems to roll with it. After a few hours of dancing and drinking, I am thoroughly lost in the sensations of the night. It's intoxicating to say the least. A few of my fellow dancers started getting grabby drinks ago. They quickly learned to look and not to touch.

I am dancing when a large, bald black man finds me on the dance floor and reveals himself to be a bouncer. The bouncer explains that the owner of the club is requesting to see me. I am immediately weary of this request as I've danced on every square inch of his night club but I oblige just on the basis of fear that he'd ban me from coming here again.

The bouncer leads me through the club and upstairs to the VIP room at the back of the club. Most of the VIP sections are open, though separated by a few dozen curtains. Most are for exhibitionists. This club has facets I've never even though to explore. I begin to wonder what kind of things hide in the dark here.

The bouncer leads me to a closed-off room with two equally large guards. One is a tattooed blonde that reminds me of someone I'd find in a biker bar. The other looks a might thinner with a bald head, not unlike the original bouncer. The guards use cards to open the door and gesture for me to go in.

As I enter hesitantly and I notice that the VIP room is filled with hot but rather unsavory men. They are all in different states of undress. Most are engaged in some kind of sexual activity. The room is unusually huge and extravagant. It's almost twice the size of my apartment. There is a huge, glass desk in the middle of the room with a grey luxury swivel chair behind it. The chair is facing away, hiding the owner's identity.

"You rang?" I ask as I glance around at the debauchery. It isn't my scene, though I'm not averse to seeing it. For every couple or throuple or more, at least one looks up and stares at me. Their eyes glow in the darkness of the room. I feel self-conscious with them and my attention turns to the chair as it turns and reveals the incubus I'd previously slept with. I chuckle as I cross my arms over my chest, "Well fuck me sideways."

"I did." He smirks, "Did you miss me?"

"You own Intox? That explains this." I gesture around. I stare at all of them before my gaze returns to him, "Let me guess, they're all-"

"Generous clientele."

"I have about three hours until sun-up, so exactly what is it that you want? I have a lot of drinking and dancing to do."

The Incubus stands and moves around to lean on the front of the desk. He's wearing a black vest with no shirt, showcasing his muscular physique, with a pair of very tight slacks. So tight, in fact, that I can see the outline of his manhood. It gives me pleasant flashbacks.

"You're immune to me." He says with a fascinated expression, "Rarely have I met someone who's immune to me and who is just as pretty as I am."

"I don't know if you're complimenting me or yourself."

"Can't it be both?" He asks, "I've been doing research on you. You fascinate me."

"Clearly. It's usually the general consensus."

His lip jumps, "You're immune to a lot of things, huh?" He asks.

I shrug, "Is there a point to this? What is it? Is the Incubus falling in love?" I ask.

Some of the other Incubuses laugh but he glares over at them and they go back to what they were doing.

"And since when are there so man gay Incubuses? Last I read, you guys were afraid that same sexing would be fatal."

"I'm not the only one who did homework." He smirks, "We've evolved. Turns out sexual energy is sexual energy. I always knew that."

"Did you update the journal for Incubus sex habits?"

He shrugs, "It's a new entry. Pretty proud of it."

"This is going to sound strange but what's your name?" I ask.

His smirk fades, "You're serious?" He asks.

"Look, I've slept with a vampire and a werewolf before you, so good sex isn't a huge thing for me to find." I say tauntingly, "Not that you weren't exceptionally good at what you do."

"I'm not surprised, by either. You're the Bastion. Supernatural creatures are attracted to you like moths to a flame." His eyes study me, "And the name is Damien."

"Fitting."

"How so?" He asks.

"Well, even though you're calm and kind of nice, I know Incubuses aren't the nicest creatures, especially if they aren't the center of attention. I also know that you're daemons with human-like appearance."

"Right and wrong. There's actually no proof that we're daemons while we have strong ties to the fae."

"As in fairies? There are fairies?" I'm genuinely shocked. I'm personally hoping for mermaids. I take a deep breath and ask, "Do I turn you on."

"Yes." He says instantly, "I can't get you off my mind."

"You sure it's not the Bastion thing or the fact that I'm not head-over-heels for you?"

"I like the way your body feels when we're together. The way it reacts when it feels my tongue or when I enter you."

"Can we keep the dirty talk to PG?" I look around, "I'm not as free-loving as the others."

"I'd love to see you again."

"See me? Whoa, I'm not looking for a boyfriend."

"I meant naked." He confesses.

"Oh, well, that's okay." I nod, "Only request I have is that we do it in private. I'm not much of an exhibitionist."

"Your place or mine?"

I find him charming but I'm not an idiot. Even if he's telling the truth, fae aren't entirely beings of light. They're mostly tricksters with a penchant for causing chaos. Letting a Incubus loose in my life would be disastrous. Even knowing, I find myself intrigued and his question is obvious.

I grin as I answer my place.

Perry

I awake the next morning to a knock on my door. I swear loudly. It is bright and early judging by how the light shines through the windows. I keep forgetting to get curtains. I'd hope since I'm so far up, no one would see my extracurricular activities.

I look over to see the naked Incubus laying ass up in my bed. I'm not much of an butt guy, but I have to admit that his butt is beautiful. Luckily for me, I'm a cover-hog.

I panic and quickly pull on a pair of shorts, heading over to the door. I slowly pull the door open just enough to see Charlotte impatiently waiting outside my door. I curse myself for getting a studio apartment instead of one with actual rooms. Not only is there a naked Incubus in my bed, his clothes are scattered all over the room, as are mine. As a matter of fact, the few wall hangings I have been knocked off the wall as well.

I don't remember being so rough.

Charlotte peeks at me, "Hey, let me in." She says pushing lightly on the door.

I hold it, "I'm kind of busy, Char. It's not a good time. I'm nearly naked." I say trying to steady the door.

"I saw all this in elementary school!" She says as she uses more force and pushes herself inside. I'm shocked by her strength and it only takes her a second of being inside to see that a naked man is in my bed, snoring.

She turns to me and I clear my throat, "It's not what you think. It-He-Dammit!"

"Is this the same guy? Well, at least it's the same unknown guy." Charlotte jabs, "What about Lucas...or, you know, David?"

"I thought you hated David."

"I did. I-I'm just wondering."

I shrug, "It seems like a bad idea. I realized that my death literally stopped nothing but changed everything. Everyone moved on, why shouldn't I?" I ask.

"So, that's what this is about? Perry, you just came back. You don't have to move on. You should be trying adjust." Charlotte watches me, "Where did you pick this guy up?"

"He owns Intox."

"Now you're screwing the owner? Seriously? You're there every night doing God-knows-what and now you're screwing the owner?" Charlotte frowns, "You can't keep doing this. I've said this before but Perry, I am seriously worried about you! I really think you should move with me and Eva. Maybe apply for next semester and work near us."

"What?" I ask.

"We were going to go SSU so we could stay here with you but your mother-"

"You talked to my Mother...about me?" I scowl at her, "Let's be very clear on this, Char. I didn't ask for your help. I don't need your help. As a matter of fact, I'd do pretty good without hearing your opinions on what I should or shouldn't do. In short, mind your own business."

Charlotte is obviously hurt, "I'm just trying to help." She says angrily.

"By picking apart my life? By judging me? Unless you died and came back only to have your father die in your place, I need you to back the fuck up!"

"Fine! You will not have to worry about my judgment anymore. Run your life into the ground, I don't care!" She says heading for the door.

"Finally, a little honesty."

She stops and turns to me, "What are you talking about?" She asks.

"Why are you so worried about my relationship with David? I felt whatever guilt you have. So, exactly why is my relationship with him your business?" I ask.

I can feel it again. She feels guilty but also, at the mention of David's name, her emotions change. They seem to soften. I stare at her, trying not to jump to conclusions.

"Look, you need to leave this alone." Charlotte argues.

I laugh, "So, all those times you told me that he's an asshole and I should dump him-"

"It wasn't like that! He was! After you died, he changed. We all did." Charlotte says softly, "You have to understand, we didn't know if we'd even be able to bring you back."

"You're such a great friend, Char. Tell me, is there a guy in Endor who hasn't magically fallen in your vagina? I mean, your excuse then was that your parents were splitting. You going to use me as an excuse for falling for my ex-boyfriend that you urged me not see?"

"Now who's judging?"

The door flings open behind her and I gesture to it, "Kindly get the fuck out of my house." I say angrily.

Charlotte gives me a scathing look before storming out of my apartment. The door slams behind her and I feel the air leave my body. It shouldn't affect me. I shouldn't care about what happened while I was dead. I picked Lucas, for all the good that did.

So, why do I feel so betrayed?

I turn to see Damien propped on the bed, staring at me. As I'm walking to the bed, he says, "Wow, that was intense."

"Shut up." I say as pounce on him.

I need him to take me away from this feeling. He's a welcome distraction to the cluster of bad decisions that my life has become. He's fun but that's it. I already know I can never love him. I can't even trust him. There's a difference between trusting him and screwing him.

I can only do one and I choose to screw him.

Perry

Later in the day, after I've gotten rid of my Incubus lover, I invite David to my apartment. He readily agrees and says he'll be over in a little.

I know that Charlotte feels guilty about whatever happened between them. I know that she feels something for him, but I need to know if it was reciprocated.

I ask him to come over but don't let on that I know about him and Charlotte. In all honesty, I'm tired of being misled and let down by people I fight and die for. Charlotte's betrayal is especially gruesome because of her insistence on me not dating him in the first place. She downed him every chance she got and it burns to think it was for any other reason than her looking out for me.

David's betrayal is par for the course. The more things change with him, the more they stay the same.

I clean the house up and fix myself up for his impending visit. I've begun to notice odd things about myself. I notice that I've began to gravitate to dark colors. A maroon v-neck and dark jeans. The dark colors never seemed to be an issue but now it's all I wear.

The doorbell rings and I gather what righteous indignation I can muster to combat whatever lie he tells. I open the door and butterflies circle my stomach. Fear sets in as I'm not sure if it's because I'm seeing him or if it's because I'm about to find out something I really would rather not.

I invite him in.

After offering him a drink, I return with two sodas. I hand him his soda and take a seat across the coffee table in a mall red chair that clashes with the yellow couch. I watch him as he drinks his soda. When he notices, he smiles over at me. I hear a beep come from his pocket. He takes his phone out and glances at it before stuffing it in his pocket.

"Who is that?" I ask.

The question unsettles him. He clears his throat, "It's not important. So, why did you want to talk to me?" He asks.

"I could beat around the bush. It's what I'd normally do. I'd let you tighten your own noose. I'm running short on time and patience this year, being newly revived and all." I frown, "Since I got back, people get telling me how great it is that I'm back and how they missed me. How-"

David sits the soda on the table, "I don't understand. What are we talking about?" He asks.

"I know about you and Charlotte." The color drains from his face. I can see the nervousness creep across his face. I physically see the change in him. I don't need to ask questions because everything I need to know is written on his face. I sit back in my chair and let out an angry chuckle, "You people are disturbed."

"You were-"

I slam my hand on the coffee table with enough force to make a small crack, "I know what I was! I know exactly what I was and I know how much I meant to all of you! Turns out very little. Dammit, since I've been back you've been trailing behind me like a lost puppy, pretending that you mourned me and you were some sort of saint, pining for me to come back."

"How do you think Charlotte and I got together? We mourned you for months."

"I wish my father would have never done what he did. I wish I was still gone. Maybe then people could finish mourning. That's how you described it, right? Mourning."

"That's the root of your problem. You're not dead! You're here, with us." David says angrily.

"I'm not with you. I am not with any of you." I say angrily. I stand and gestured to the door. The force is almost enough to pull the hinges off. I point to it, "Out!" I bark.

"Don't do this. I knew I screwed up, immediately after I-after we-" He stammers. I watch as he takes a deep breath, "I love you. I have for a while now. You knew before me how I felt about you. Remember that. It's why I can honestly say I mourned you. I continue to mourn you, Perry. This isn't you, no matter how many times you argue that it is. You're hurting and you're spiraling."

"I hate you." I say venomously, "I always thought that meeting Lucas and Finn was the start of whatever downward trajectory my life took, but it wasn't. It was the moment I caught your eye. The moment you found whatever you found in me. You need to get out of my house right now."

"Can we-"

"There is no we. I wish I'd never met you. It's the one thing I wish more than being dead." I say angrily. I gesture to the door again, "Leave before I throw you out."

David is hurt by my words. It's a precise and surgical cut to him. I wonder if I really have a right to be mad and then my own voice accosts me for being such an idiot. Of course I deserve to be angry. I deserve to be pissed.

I ignore the hurt look on his face. My blood is boiling again. I watch as he leaves the room. The door slams behind him so hard I feel as if I hear a crack in the wood. I'm shaking with anger.

"You're doing the right thing."

I look to my side and gasp when I see my father standing a few feet away. I stare at him as he moves forward, "Dad?" I ask.

"I told you I wouldn't leave you." He smiles, "I never liked him. He was never good enough."

"You're here?" I ask.

I stare at him. There is something insincere about him. All parts of my body tell me not to believe this. I know this is some kind of sick joke but at the moment, I need to believe he's here. I need to believe he's with me, so I do. I move to him and try to touch him but my hand goes through him.

"I am." He says warmly.

David and Charlotte

Charlotte walks into Byars to pick up an order for herself and Eva.

The waiter tells her that her food will be ready momentarily and she nods in agreement. She moves to search for a seat and finds David is sitting at the bar having a drink. He looks like someone ran over his dog. Her mind comes to the only logical conclusion for him to be drinking again.

Perry.

Charlotte moves over and sits on the stool beside him. He looks over briefly as he takes a sip of his whiskey. He casts a scornful look at her before looking straight ahead again. Charlotte is sure now that he's spoken with Perry. The look in his eyes tell the story.

"I texted you." Charlotte says softly.

David snorts, "I know."

"I tried to warn you-"

David slams the glass on the counter, "What we did was the worst mistake of my life. I can't believe I let it happen. I know you never wanted me with Perry. I figured as much. You sabotaged us." He says angrily, "Why?"

"I didn't tell him, I swear." Charlotte frowns, "He was mad at me and it just escalated. He got so mad and he read me."

"What did he read from you, Char?"

"How guilty I was. I how much I-He thinks I have feelings for you."

"Do you?" He asks.

Charlotte stares forward now, "I love him more than I care about you. Even if he's being a total asshole." She says gently.

"Well, I doubt either one of us has a chance of getting back in his good graces."

"I don't think there's a single person that's still in his good graces." Charlotte sighs, "I keep thinking his anger is going to go away, that his grief will kick in and he'll let some of it go. He just gets angrier."

"He wishes he were dead."

"What? Did he say that?" She asks. David nods. She frowns, "I don't think this is all just him coming back. I mean, I know that had to be excruciating, but this is something else."

"What? Like PTSD? Or Depression?" David asks, "I don't know. He talked about the light. I think he thinks it was heaven."

"Maybe it was." Charlotte says.

"Or maybe it was his safe place."

"Before he died, he was spiraling. I think this is bigger than his resurrection. I think it goes back further." Charlotte frowns, "What if this didn't start with him dying? What if that just pushed him over the edge?"

"Like, something mental? No! We'd have known." David says thinking to himself.

"Would we? Maybe we just wrote it off to all of the horrible shit happening to him and the rest of us." Charlotte shrugs, "Maybe Porter or Penny has insight."

"We need to talk to them, see if they remember anything."

"There's something else and I don't want you to overreact or take this to a dark place, especially if we're right." David eyes her and she continues, "He's been exhibiting strange behavior."

"No shit."

"No...he goes to a gay bar outside of Boston like every night. He gets totally wasted and he's been...To my knowledge, it's one person. He's been sleeping with a really strange guy. The guy give me the creeps."

David stares at her. His mind is racing. He knew that he'd been on his own a lot lately and even that he'd started going to some club. The news that Perry is drinking and sleeping with some guy begins to unnerve David.

"Say something."

"I know some of these symptoms. I'm calling a group meeting. Invite everyone." David says as he stands and throws money on the counter.

As he leaves, the waiter comes back with the girls' order. Charlotte can't decide if she just made things worse or better.

Penny's Home

David and Charlotte call everyone to Penny's home.

The group includes Penny, Porter, Kai, Eva, Parker, Jason and Finn. Finn was unable to deter his brother, Godric, from attending as well.

Charlotte takes the time to explain to the group her theory about Perry. Everyone listens carefully, not daring to interrupt her. When Charlotte finally stops with her theory, they all take it in. Penny and Porter stand behind the group and Charlotte notices they are whispering between each other. When the two realize that Charlotte, and now the rest of the group, is staring at them, they address everyone.

"There's something we need to tell all of you." Porter says looking around, "My family's history with magic has been a bit morally ambiguous. As you know, the magic in our family is strong and magic itself is neither light or dark, but it does corrupt."

"What are you saying? That magic corrupted Perry?" Jason asks.

"No," Penny replies, "I had a sister. Her name was Portia. She was corrupted by magic but she was highly susceptible."

"Why?" Parker asks.

Penny sighs, "I'm sorry. It's been a while since I talked about it. When I was a girl, my sister was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. It spiraled out of control and she fell into the dark side. She began practicing dark magic and as her illness progressed, she began to act out and lash out. There was no way of saving her. My Mother was devastated, as was I. Her condition led her to darkness and kept her there."

"So, you have a history of mental illness?" Eva asks sitting up, "And it never occurred to you that he might have it?"

"Yes and no. We ripped him out of the afterlife. There haven't been many who have been successfully resurrected, so no one knows what the repercussions were." Penny frowns at the thought, "After everything I've heard, I can't ignore it. I saw signs before he died but we were all going through so much, especially him, that I discounted my instincts. He's not okay."

"There's one problem," David interrupts, "He's not going to let any of us get close enough to reach him."

"There's just a few us he still trusts." Eva sighs, sinking her head into her hands, "So how do we reach him without him thinking we're blind-siding him?"

"We can't." Porter says sharply, "You know him. This will put him on the offensive. He's not going to want to hear this."

"He already knows that something is wrong." David argues, "He knows how far gone he is."

"But backed into a corner, he'll fight his way out." Porter shoots back, "A witches' emotions control their powers. He's out of control, so his powers are out of control. He's dangerous."

"So, we just let him drown?" Jason asks, "He's helped all of us, brought us all out of what we were going through. We have to try."

"And we will, but we need a plan." Porter says looking to Finn, "What about Lucas? He brought him back before."

"I don't think he's an option. He's dealing with his own stuff right now. Besides, they didn't really leave off on the best circumstances." Finn replies, "Porter, how about you?"

"I don't think I have any influence on him anymore."

"He needs to hear it from me." Penny says softly.

The whole room stares at her. The collective thought is one of disbelief. Penny, of all the people in the room, is the biggest trigger for Perry. The last time they were in a room together, it didn't go well. He's all but insisted that he doesn't want to be anywhere near her.

"He's my baby. I can't lose him again. We've all lost too much." Penny says moving towards the door. She grabs her coat and Porter grabs her wrist, "Port, sweetie, take care of your sister."

"That doesn't sound like a mother going to save her son. It sounds like someone marching to her death." Porter says with frustration, "You're afraid."

"I watched my sister turn on everyone who loved her. I watched her descend into madness and turn into someone I didn't recognize. You are right, Porter. He's dangerous but I cannot give up on him. I couldn't save her but I can save him."

Porter stares at her, "He's the maddest at you, Mom. He's not going to believe a word you say. Let me come with you. Let me help you with this." He says with worry.

"If I can't reach him, I need you to be ready to catch him when he falls." Penny says kissing him on the cheek. She gives a faint smile as she leaves the house.

Perry

"I died to bring you back. You died so I could live. Other people will never understand the sacrifices we have to make. They wouldn't do the same." My father says as he paces behind me. I sit on the couch, listening to him. He stops, "They will never truly appreciate the sacrifice. In the end, they'll turn away from. They'll walk away and leave you just as you are."

"And what am I?" I chance a question.

"Alone." He says simply, "Let's be honest, I can't stay here forever. Or you won't be able to see me forever. Sooner or later, it'll all fade away and you'll be alone again."

Since his first appearance, he's lingered. At first, I was afraid of what this meant. Seeing my dead Father again was a dream at first. The more I hear from him, the more I can't deny he's not my real father. I can't decide if he's something insidious or a memory. I've begun to think it's an illusion of my mind.

He's like the annoying cricket from Pinocchio with a sinister twist.

I'm relieved when I hear a knock on my door. Listening to faux Alan tell me how alone I am is starting to cause anxiety within me. I don't know who or what he is. I jump to my feet and jog to the door. My expectations are shattered when I see my mother's face. I attempt to slam the door but she uses her powers to barge in. She walks in the apartment, looking around. When she's seen enough, she turns to me.

"Nice apartment. Mind if I ask how you can afford it?"

I can immediately tell that she's not here to ask this question nor to make small talk. I begin to wonder why she's here and why she felt the need to barge into my apartment. Just seeing her rouses a reaction inside me.

"I guess it doesn't matter."

"A reason you're here? I'm really trying to find one." I say with no hesitation.

"Don't speak to your mother like that." Dad says as he moves around her, "She's beautiful, even now."

Penny notices that I'm not looking direct at her. She eyes me with suspicion, "Are you okay, Perry?" She asks.

"Again, I ask, why are you here?"

My Father laughs, "You were always a disobedient teenager. She was always more patient than me."

"Perry!" She says causing my attention to snap to her. She stares at me with fervent worry on her face, "You're in trouble."

"She's not wrong. Normal people don't see ghosts of their newly dead fathers."

"I'm not normal." I groan.

"No and that puts you at more risk." Mother continues, "There's something I have to tell you. It's about-"

"Speak really fast."

My Mother clears her throat, "Mental illness runs in our family. We've all been talking-"

"Stuff just keeps running in this family." Alan says.

"Who, specifically, is talking?" I ask, "Charlotte and Eva? No? Let me guess, David. I mean, I don't forgive him so I must be mentally ill."

"Before you died, you were falling into a depression. You were moody and irritable and unhappy with your life. It's why you didn't fight to be here. It's why you're so angry now."

"I'm angry because you're all insane! I'm angry because what's dead should stay dead! I'm angry because had I known who and what I was, I wouldn't have lost so many people."

My Mother looks at me sadly, "You don't know that! Perry, you're angry with me for something I can't change! I cannot and will not take the blame for what happened to your father. I won't stand here and listen to you berate me anymore. I came to help you. I didn't want to believe it, but I think you're sick." She says with more confidence than I've heard from her in a long time.

"I'm not sick!"

"Yes you are," Dad says as he appears at my side, "You know you are. You thought it was residual from the spell. You thought it was magic. But now you're not sure. Maybe you're just a screwed up little man."

"Shut up!" I yell.

"Perry, I didn't say anything. Are you alright?" Penny asks moving towards me.

I take a step back, "Both of you stay away from me! Get out!" I say angrily, causing the door to fly open.

"No. I let you go before but I can't watch you tear yourself apart. Perry, we need you."

"I've given everything I have to you people! I don't have anything left." I rage.

"What about Petyon?"

I stare at her, "She's not my problem"

"Your baby sister is not a problem!" Penny says angrily, "She, like you and Porter, are the very welcome product of your father and me."

"She's our second chance." Dad says with a smirk.

I raise my hand, causing Penny to float above the ground, choking. I can't control it anymore. I watch in horror as she gasps for air. I don't want to do this. It's the anger inside of me boiling to the surface. Faux Alan's words struck a nerve. It's what I've been thinking all along.

"Perry!" Porter's voice calls.

My hand drops and Penny along with it. Porter is at the doorway with Peyton in his arms. I glare at him as he moves towards me. I push my hand forward, trying to push them away from me but he keeps walking towards me. I try again and, again, it doesn't work.

I stare at my hand, wondering what's happening to my powers. Porter is standing in front of me with Peyton in his arms. I'm unsure of what to do and so my eyes catch Peyton's. It's the first time I've seen her and she's beautiful. I can only describe seeing her as a shock to my system. It sends a shockwave through my entire nervous system. It causes something I haven't had since I returned. I can see my father in her. I can see an aura around her, presumably left by my father. His parting gift to her.

"Look at yourself, little brother. Look at what you've turned into." Porter says, calling my attention back to him.

In a sudden burst, I feel a full range of emotions, ending in grief. The emotions hit so quickly and so hard that I feel physical pain. I look around, my eyes falling on my mother. I watch as my mother walks to us and as she touches me, light envelopes all of us. As the light dissipates, I realize it's night outside and we're in a cemetery now, more specifically at my father grave.

I back away from them, "What are we doing here? I don't-I don't want to be here!" I shout.

"You saved him, Perry. You gave him time to meet his daughter and to say his last goodbyes. That's more than anyone ever gets." Porter says softly.

"He died for you, because you sacrificed yourself for him. He loved you, just like you loved him. He was so proud of you, but you know that." Penny says, "That being said, it's okay for you to blame him, for you to be angry with him."

"Who are they to tell you something about me?" Dad appears beside them, "They're tricking you. Lulling you into a false sense of security."

"Perry..." Porter moves toward me again.

"Shut up!" I shout, lashing my powers out and destroying my father's gravestone. The sky darkens and lightning cracks across the sky. Lightning strikes a tree, splitting it in two. In a swift movement, I move to the newly dug grave and my legs give out, causing me sink to my knees, "Damn you! I don't deserve to be here and you knew that. You didn't care that if I came back, I'd need you! Or that they need you! What are we supposed to do without you?"

Penny moves over and kneels beside me, "It's okay, Perry."

"It's not! He didn't care what it would do to me, how I'd feel about being back when he isn't here! He never considered that he deserved to be here more than I did!" I say through tears, "I don't want to be here. It hurts. It hurts so much all the time."

Penny pulls me into her bosom, "I know, baby. I know."

Perry

I stand in my apartment, stuffing my clothes in a suitcase once again. I've grown accustomed to coming and going. After my meltdown, the final one, I decided that staying here is too much. My Mother and Brother agreed with me and Penny offered to send me to a sort of rehab in the English countryside. She told me she has a friend there that specializes in supernatural grief as well as mortal illness.

I resisted at first but the more I thought about it, the more it appealed to me. I can't face my friends right now. I can't undo the damage I caused in this condition. I need to be healed and I can only heal by being away from here.

As I finish packing, Porter comes into the room. I acknowledge him before continuing to pack my suitcase. He moves to the bed beside my suitcase and has a seat, staring up at me.

"They want to see you." Porter says quietly.

"No." I say quickly.

"They love you."

"Do they? I don't want to see any of them, especially like this." I say sadly.

Porter grabs my hand, "You're sick. You are letting us help you. We all understand." He says with a gentle smile.

"I'm not ready to even look at Charlotte or David and I can't face Eva. I've been so out of control. I pushed everyone away."

"You tried. If you didn't notice, you failed."

"Still. So, I still have this place for another year. Do you want it?" I ask.

Porter looks around, "The apartment? You sure?" He asks.

I smile and kiss his forehead, "You deserve it. Take care of it, Port." I say as I pick up my bag and head to the door.

"Hey, you'll be back in no time."

I stop and turn to him, "Sure." I nod.

I wave at him one final time before I leave the room. I stand in the middle of my apartment and look around one last time. It never seemed so small before. I'm afraid. I'm terrified. I pushed everyone away but I was never lonely. I can't help but feel lonely now. I'm sick, yes, but it can't have me.

So, I'm scared. I do the only thing I can do.

I just breathe.