Runningwind: Hello, StarClan! We are here tonight on Things That Happened in Your Life. I am your host, Runningwind, and tonight, our contestant is the one and only Patchpelt!

A cat in the audience: That cat doesn't belong on a quiz show! He believes in ponies in the sky that smell like pepperoni!!!

Patchpelt: Are you insulting cheese ponies? Be careful, they may strike you down with lightning!

Bluestar: Weirdo!

Nightstar: I wouldn't be talking if I were you, Bluestar....

Bluestar: Shut up, frog-breath!

(Nightstar launches himself at Bluestar. Security has to drag Nightstar off of Bluestar)

Runningwind: Patchpelt, do you know what the prize is if you win?

Patchpelt: Umm....free cheese pies from Mousefur-cat's restaurant for life?

Runningwind: No. The prize is...

Audience: 500,000 mice!

Runningwind: Our first question is an example question. It's a yes or no question...so is your fur green?

Patchpelt: Umm, me-cat don't think so...so me-cat's answer is no!

Runningwind: Correct! Answer five more questions correctly and you win...

Audience: 500,000 mice!

Runningwind: Which cat came into ThunderClan as a kittypet?

Patchpelt: Fire-Fire-cat!!!

Runningwind: Um, who's Fire-Fire-cat?

Bluestar: That weirdo cat's name for Firestar.

Runningwind: Correct! Question three: What natural disaster caused Halftail's death?(A/N: This natural disaster also caused Patchpelt's death)

Patchpelt(shuddering): A fire.

Runningwind: Correct! Question four: Which cat was Crookedstar's mate?

Patchpelt: Willow...hey look, it's a zebra-horse!(runs off the stage into the crowd)

Runningwind: Okay then...I suppose that means Patchpelt won't win...

Audience: 500,000 mice!

Runningwind: Okay, then, until next time, may StarClan light your path and may the prey be plentiful!