TW: I get cussy in this one.

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This year has been fucking hard.

Fuck.

I could probably express it in more eloquent terms but I wasn't ready for what 2020 would become, especially after the 2019 my family and I had. God gave me the strength to make it through, because I wouldn't have thought I had it in me.

Despite all the tragedies, fears and disappointments of 2020 that messed up my head real bad, I somehow managed to keep moving even when I thought I wasn't accomplishing "anything."

That was probably the biggest lesson I've had to learn this year. Patience: with myself, with processes, with other people. Things happen for a reason, especially the things we don't like. There's always something to learn from them. Defeats and disappointments are building blocks to climb higher. (And boy, at the rate I'm going I'll reach the stratosphere pretty dang soon).

A lot of good (even great), things happened this year too—and I'm conflicted about them. While I'm so happy and grateful about them, I also feel guilty. I'm sad that I can't be too happy about them. Like I shouldn't celebrate anything?

Because 2020 fucking sux, man. And I'm bracing for a 2021 just as hard or more, which is also hard AF to deal with.

So, let's officially get my grumpiest roundup underway. Here's what I accomplished in the year of our Lord 2020:

This month was super busy at work and with some unexpected travel I had to do, back when this was relatively not a big deal. Oh, those days.

My mom and sister came to visit me!!! We were so happy!!! So I dedicated all my time to them!!! I miss them!!!

HALL OF FAME's First Official Feature: Wattpad's Cozy Up & Connect featured HOF among its recommended books to read for the beginning of the lockdowns.

Finished Posting EDGE OF ROMANCE: This was bittersweet because bittersweet was this book. Addy and Miguel's happy ending came after so many losses and whew, wasn't that a mood.

Started Writing KISS AND TELL: Yeah, so I low-key had been planning this book since the start of the year and I was finally ready to start tackling it.

Opened an Instagram Account: The goal of this was to celebrate hitting 2k followers and also to pretend things were okay, weeeeee.

HOT LIKE ICE's First Official Feature: WattpadExplorer featured HLI on its Aries Season reading list! I had to do a bit of Googling to see the characteristics of an Aries and yeah, I could see Charlie all over it, LOL.

Finished Writing KISS AND TELL: It took me two months to write this book and during that time Cata and Gabe brought me much joy.

Started Posting ONCE A CHEATER: I wrote this one last year but it took me a minute to prepare all the graphics. I honestly can't remember when I did that? Must have been between January and February.

Got Interviewed by MaRS about Wattpad: This is a Canadian publication about technology and they wanted to find out the impact of the lockdowns on WP's user base. It was pretty interesting!

Wrote a Guest Post for the NaNoWriMo Blog: This also happened and it was super cool!

Applied to WriteMentor: My people, the Millennials, have a wise saying that goes: YOLO. So I went for it not expecting anything.

EDGE OF ROMANCE Ranked #1 in Romance: For three days EOR was at the top of this here orange app. How? Why? I will never know. What I can tell you is that it got like 50k reads in three days, which remains a record for any of my stories.

Finished Posting ONCE A CHEATER: I was overcome with joy when I finally shared the mango chapter. It's one of my top creative moments ever.

HALL OF FAME Selected For WriteMentor: YOLO didn't fail me!!! I was selected as a mentee for a prestigious, industry, mentorship program!!! AAAAAHHHH!!! And if that weren't all, my mentor was such a great guy and we became friends right away. And my fellow mentees were wonderful gems too? Ugh, be still my heart.

Started Posting KISS AND TELL: Somehow I started posting my sixth novel on here. It feels like it was yesterday when I started posting HOF??? How did this happen??

WriteMentor Work on HALL OF FAME: I went absolutely bonkers this month, working intensively on HOF as though there'd be no tomorrow.

HALL OF FAME Featured in Editor's Pick: And not just that, in the hero spot!! (For those unfamiliar with the term, it's the very first spot of the list). Mind boggling. Wonderful. Scary. My feels were in their feels because this was one of the three things I always wished to accomplish on Wattpad.

Started Writing KISS THE SKY: At the end of July I figured I didn't want to wait anymore to get this book started, and also because I needed a serious distraction from the doom and gloom in my head.

Hit 3k Followers: Yo, what??? Wasn't it like yesterday that I hit 2k?

This was honestly the month when my mental health started going south. I did my best to keep afloat, which meant bingeing on kdramas like nobody's business, planning future books and writing KISS THE SKY. All while having daily emotional crises :)

IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY!!! Alone!!! And sad!!! YEEEEEE—

Finished Writing KISS THE SKY: I did managed to finish a book, woot!

Finished WriteMentor Mentorship: And I also managed to finish massive edits on another book, woot woot!

Hit 4k Followers: Wait, WHAT?? WHAT?!

Celebrated Hispanic and Latinx Heritage Month at Wattpad: Got interviewed for a special feature of Hispanic and Latinx Stars by the WattpadStars team! This was the very first time this event was celebrated and I may or may not have had a hand in its inception (:

KISS AND TELL's First Official Feature: As part of the festivities, KAT was featured by the Community Curator Ariana_Godoy.

Applied for Wattys: Following in my YOLO lifestyle, I applied for the awards at the last minute (I'm talking with like, maybe a day to spare, LOL).

Got into BTS: Totally a writing accomplishment, right?

Finished Posting KISS AND TELL: As seen by my previous rant, I was pretty bad at keeping up with comments but I at least managed to not disappoint you all and did finish the story. Yay?

WOLFISHLY EVER AFTER's First Official Feature: I was pretty shocked that WEA was one of the featured stories for Werewolf Week!

Applied for Wattys Shorts: Probably riding the high of Werewolf Week, I decided to enter WEA and OAC on this contest too.

Side note: You must have gathered already that I'm someone who likes to shoot her shot.

ONCE A CHEATER a Wattys Shorts Finalist: Plot twist!!! For the first time in my orange life I get to put any sort of official sticker on the cover of one of my books as OAC makes it as a finalist of the Alternative Stories category. Whoa!

Edited the YA Fantasy for NaNoWriMo: The only bad thing out of the WriteMentor mentorship was that it threw off the timing for me to join the Camp NaNoWriMos and also the official NaNoWriMo. So, November was meant to be for productive rest rather than drafting, and instead I decided to use the energy of the month to put my newly acquired WM tools into editing my 2019 NaNoWriMo. That, and I also had a couple of friends waiting for the book since last year. Oops.

WE THE YOUNG Won a Watty: Yooooooooooooo—WHAAAAAATTTTT. I—I... Whoa. WHOA. I mean, we all know WTY is my most underrated novel. I never would've imagined that it'd win a Watty in the hotly contested Young Adult category!!! In the year of our Lord 2020!!! Or ever!!!

Side note: Remember when I mentioned three things I wanted to accomplish on WP? They were getting featured (see March 2020), becoming a Star (see Rant #26 December 2019), and winning a Watty. The Wattpad Trifecta has been unlocked. Let me go cry now.

Started Writing The Book That Comes After KISS THE SKY: Hehehehe I'm so excited about this book because it is Pure Undiluted 100% Certified Fluff. I promise you no one's life is in danger in this one. It's just a cute, lovely, cozy little book. And while you don't know the female main character, her love interest is known to you if you have read my books. I'll start dropping more heavy-handed hints in a few months.

HALL OF FAME and HOT LIKE ICE Hit 500k Reads Each: *insert white guy blinking gif*

Scored a Record of 31 Kdramas Watched: Also totally a writing accolade, huh?

I Made New Friends: A lot of Good Things did happen this year but it was surprisingly the Bad Things that brought me closer to people, and actually helped me make new friends? I guess we all just found each other because we needed someone to lean on to and share some of our burden. I'm so, so thankful for this.

Expectations: Bad things happen when I have expectations. And by bad, I mean I tend to be harsher to myself to achieve them and when I don't succeed. We don't want that energy in 2021, especially since I've been suffering from it in the last trimester of 2020. I have not been very kind to myself because even though all the good things I listed above happened, there have also been defeats behind the scenes that have been very hard for me to deal with.

Resolutions: So one of my resolutions is to do a good ol' Frozen here and Let It Go—as in, let those expectations go fuck themselves.

I also have planned out my slate of writing projects for the entire 2021, and I intend to foray back into YA Contemporary, also venture into new genres like a Vampire Romance, and undisclosed!others.

The goal is to keep myself Very Mucho Busy during 2021 to stave off the madness. Should be fun!

Thank you all for contributing to keep me motivated during this awful, horrible nightmare of a year! I hope you can join me in whatever journey 2021 brings for us.

I also hope you all have managed to stay safe and healthy along with your loved ones. I invite you to be kind to yourselves in 2021, and to practice as much patience as you can.