Predestined

A short story by Lumeare

Napangiti ako nang makita kung gaano ka aliwalas ang kalangitan. Ang buwan ay may kalahating pakurbang hugis habang may isang bituin sa itaas nito. The other stars were twinkling far apart from each other. I couldn't say that the lone star near the moon is the perfect pair for the latter. In fact, it wasn't even a star. It's the planet Venus, the planet closest to the Earth and is preferred to
as the morning star.

Funny isn't it? That a planet can become a star in someone's perspective. Katulad din iyon ng pagtingin ng mga tao sa atin. If they don't see your image clearly, they'd assume you were someone else or that you'd have a bad or good impression to them.

"Juni, what are you waiting for Mags-start na ang party ni Kuya!" Syden, my best friend, called from behind. Lumingon ako at nakita siyang malawak na nakangiti sa akin. Her flowy dress
seemed to fit her perfectly.

"Hindi naman ako importante para maging present sa pagkanta ng Happy birthday," untag ko ngunit naglalakad na patungo sa kaniya. My friend chuckled cutely.

"Kahit na. Bisita ka kaya dapat kantahan mo rin si Kuya."

Napailing na lamang ako. Syden held my hand and pulled me inside the house. Madalas akong maimbitahan ng mga Costello sa kanilang mansyon. Ever since they adopted Syden when we were kids, my friend never failed to remember me. Sa kada okasyon na importante sa kaniya ay iniimbitahan ako. Although sometimes I don't attend, especially if it isn't about Syden. Don't get me wrong but I'm really grateful for the Costellos for taking care of my friend. Hindi biro ang magpalaki ng anak, lalo na at hindi mo pa kadugo. But as years go by, I saw how my friend grew up beautifully and happy with the life her parents had given her. Masayang-masaya ako kasi kahit malalaki na kami, hindi pa rin nila pinabayaan ang kaibigan ko.

They were already singing a Happy Birthday song for Boaz, Syden's older brother. He was cheekily smiling on the surprise. Si Tita Agatha ay may hawak na cake tapos may isang candle doon na parang fireworks kung sumindi. There were small candles around the cake, I bet there's thirty of them.

Thirty years, huh. How does it feel when you're that old? Malapit na siyang lumagpas sa numero ng kalendaryo pero ni minsan, iniisip ko kung gaano ba kahirap abutin ang expectations ng lahat sa iyo. Boaz Costello is a successful man, an heir to their company. Ever since we were young, he has it all—the brains, the beauty and maybe...my attention.

Ayaw kong sabihin kay Syden na noon pa lang, gusto ko na si Boaz. Sino ba naman ang hindi?
He's got humor, he's an overprotective and loving brother, he's handsome, and smart. At kung may
pipiliin man akong lalaki, gusto ko ay siya na. But of course, that would be the biggest
impossibility in my life. Ang layo-layo ko kay Boaz. Any girls could have him but me. I doubt
he's even attracted to me.

Hindi naman ako sobrang maganda. Thanks to my parents' genes, I managed to have an aquiline nose and almond-shaped eyes. Itim na itim ang mahaba at straight kong buhok. Matangkad naman ako. I was thin but not too thin. This kind of image however, doesn't attract Boaz's attention. Hindi ko naman gusto na magustuhan niya ako dahil lang sa mukha ko o anyo. I want him to see me as me—not just his sister's best friend but a woman, too. Pero paano naman mangyayari iyon kung hindi ko naman siya madalas makita at minsan, hindi naman kami nagkaroon ng maayos na usapan.

"Happy birthday, Kuya!" Syden greeted her brother. Sa tabi niya ay ang asawang si Rhett. Nakasunod lamang ako sa dalawa dahil wala naman akong masyadong kakilala sa pamilya nila.

"Thank you, Syd. Kanina pa ba kayo? You did not tell me there will be a surprise. Ang akala ko ay simpleng dinner lang," he said but I caught him glancing at me. Ngumiti ako sa kaniya.

"Si Mommy naman kasi ang nag-plano, Kuya. You're thirty and it's special!"

Boaz rolled his eyes. "Should you be telling me that?"

I smiled a bit. Nakakahiya ba na malaman ng lahat na thirty ka na? It's normal to grow old.

Nagtagal ang usapan nila at hindi pa ako nakakabati. I don't think it matters if I'd greet him or not. Baka makalimutan niya lang din na bumati ako.

"How about you, Juni?" Boaz asked me. Tumaas ang dalawang kilay ko dahil hindi naabutan ang una niyang sinabi.

"Uhm, ha?" I uttered, dumbfounded.

Boaz chuckled softly. "We're planning to eat outside. The long table in the dining is not enough for everyone."

Ah, akala ko kung ano na.

"Sasama siya sa atin of course, Kuya. Hindi ko naman papabayaan si Juniper," Syden interjected. Ngumiti ako at sumang-ayon.

When we went inside the dining area, it was indeed fully packed with some members of their family. Namataan ko si Kuya Jax na kaibigan din ni Boaz.

Sometimes, I couldn't bring myself to call him Kuya Boaz. Parang minsan, nagdadalawang-isip ako.

I followed them closely as we went near the pool area. May pinahanda na si Syden na table para sa amin at pinadagdagan pa ang upuan dahil naroon si Kuya Jax at ang girlfriend niya. The table was then filled with chatters, with Kuya Jax asking Syden about her review for the PLE.

"I don't know if I'm ready but it is what it is, right?" Syden answered.

"You'll do good in the exam, flower," I heard Rhett whispered to her.

Wala sa sariling napangiti ako. Dati-rati, ang tingin ni Syden kay Rhett ay kaaway. Growing up, she hated how he could despise her. They were on a silent war for years that sometimes, I don't
understand where the hate was coming from. But then I saw something between the two of them, a spark that none of the two even noticed in their every encounter.

I can't help but think if Boaz felt the same way? Nararamdaman niya kaya iyong iilang pagsulyap ko sa kaniya noon? Does he even hear my little cheers for him whenever he is on the game or that when he is acing a competition? Sigurado namang hindi, pero hindi ko naman nakakaligtaang mag-congrats sa kaniya sa tuwing nakakarinig ng magandang balita.

"How about you, Juni? How's working at the firm?" To my surprised, Boaz asked me the question. Parang nalipat sa akin ang atensyon ng lahat. I felt conscious that I needed to filter my words well.

"Oh, lumipat ka pala ng company, 'di ba?" It was Kuya Jax who added.

Tumango ako. I felt something at the side of my lips, like a sauce maybe, but I did not bother wiping it. Akmang magsasalita na ako nang abutan ako ni Boaz ng panyo. My lips parted when
my eyes darted down on a thin white cloth neatly folded into a square.

"T-thanks," I stuttered. Agad kong kinuha iyon at pinunasan ang aking labi. I did not return it immediately. Nakakahiya na ibabalik ko na madumi na. Wala namang tissue sa table namin at baka maya-maya pa idadagdag.

"Okay naman 'yong firm. I'm still adjusting but everything's fine. My team's welcoming naman."

"It would be too hard for you if they aren't. Naku, sasayangin nila ang isang magaling na engineer na katulad mo," Syden said.

I chuckled. "Hindi naman ako magaling, Syd. I'm just doing what's exactly needed to do."

I didn't want the attention. Ayaw ko naman kasing masabihang magaling at baka ang taas ng expectation sa akin. I am just doing my job well. I want to Sister Martha to be proud of me. In fact, nang dahil sa pamilya ko sa orphanage, nagsumikap akong mag-aral. I competed with some of the brainy kids in our school, been into different competitions, and even had to face off Syden at one
of those events.

"Water?" Lumundag ang puso ko nang biglang magtanong si Boaz sa tabi ko. Kanina pa ako hindi mapakali kasi nga magkatabi kami at akala ko ay bibigyan niya pa ng isang upuan ang pagitan
namin.

I guess for him it was not a big deal to be beside me. Pero sa akin, oo. He was rather attentive. Kanina ang panyo, ngayon naman ay tubig.

I had this love-hate relationship whenever I see Boaz. Minsan nakakainis na hindi niya ako
mapansinpansin and when he does, all my heart could do is to somersault in joy. And sometimes,
what I feel for him is seasonal—na kapag palagi ko siyang nakikita, gustong-gusto ko siya at kung
hindi naman, madalas nakakalimutan ko rin na nagkakagusto ako.

My feelings for Boaz return like Autumn, that I'd fall every single time. Every drop of his attention
feels like a fleeting thump in my chest.

"Thank you," sabi ko sa kaniya. Sinalinan niya ng tubig ang aking baso. He filled my glass with a
three-fourth amount of water. Sandaling napangiti ako sa maingat niyang pagbuhos ng tubig na
para bang ayaw niyang masayang ang bawat patak.

I watched him closely. He just casually placed the pitcher on the table and answered Kuya Jax questions. I'm glad that he was smiling despite looking a bit restless and rugged. Ang ilalim kasi
ng mata niya ay may namumuo ng linya at kaunting nangingitim. His hair was a bit longer than the last time I saw him.

The night lasted with me casting a few glances at Boaz while he was talking. Napuno ng tawanan ang aming table na hindi ko na namalayan ang paglalim ng gabi. Syden was already asleep on her
husband's arms. Ang girlfriend naman ni Kuya Jax ay nag-aaya ng umuwi.

"Sasabay ka ba sa amin ni Syd, Juni?" tanong sa akin ni Rhett.

I glanced at my sleeping best friend. Mukhang pagod at baka hindi na nga magising. Mas mabuting makauwi sila agad kaysa naman ihatid pa nila ako sa tinutuluyan ko.

"Hindi na, Rhett. Magta-taxi na lang ako pauwi."

"Are you sure?" Rhett eyed me worriedly. "Ihahatid na lang kita. Syden will scold me for not dropping you off at your apartment."

"Naku!" I chuckled. "You should mind her for now kasi mukhang sasakit na ang likod niya kapag nakatulog sa sasakyan. At saka, out of the way ang apartment ko Rhett. Ayaw kong makaabala."

Rhett just nodded but he seemed unsure. Binuhat niya na lang si Syden and I watched him carefully walk with my friend in his arms.

"Can I offer you a ride home?" tanong sa akin ni Boaz habang tinatanaw ko ang pag-alis ng mag-asawa.

Nagulat pa ako sa biglaan niyang pagsulpot. Ang alam ko kasi ay hinatid niya sa labas ng bahay sina Kuya Jax at girlfriend nito.

Tumingin ako kay Boaz. "Baka may gagawin ka pa."

"Nah. The visitors were already gone. Wala na akong gagawin pa. So, can I?"

"Sigurado ka ba?" Napakurap ako.

"Yeah. Pipilitin ako nina Mommy na ipagdrive kita kapag nakita ka nilang naghihintay riyan sa labas. Besides, it's my party, 'sort of'. You're my responsibility, Juni."

"Malaki na ako."

Tumaas ang kaniyang kilay. "And your point is?"

I bit my lower lip and casted another look at him. Naghihintay siya ng sagot ko pero wala naman akong masabi. In the end, I just agreed. Pinagpaalam niya ako sa parents nila at nagpasalamat pa sa akin si Tita Agatha dahil sa pagdalo.

I found myself sitting on the passenger's seat of Boaz's black BMW. Ang aking maliit na bag na dala ay namamahinga sa aking kandungan. When Boaz entered, his woodsy scent invaded the car. I just silently watched him as he revived the engine and turned the steering wheel.

"Babalik ka pa ba sa bahay ninyo pagkatapos mo akong ihatid? O may dadaanan ka pa? Another party perhaps?" tanong ko sa kaniya. Ayaw kong mapanis ang laway ko dahil nanahimik lang ako. I want to at least talk to him.

"I'll prolly stay in my condo. Sinabi ko naman kina Mommy na hindi ako matutulog sa bahay."

Tumango ako. Sabagay, he's all grown up now. Kahit si Syden ay hindi na rin nga roon lumalagi. It's sometimes sad that when we grow up, we tend to drift apart from the people we used to be
with. Ako kay Syden noong mga bata pa kami, Syden with her new family, ako kay Sister Martha...we grow up and we've found another home. Pero kahit kailan naman, hindi namin nakakaligtaang dalawa na lingunin ang aming pinanggalingan.

"Masyado ka bang busy sa kompanya?" tanong ko.

"Why would you ask that?" Boaz asked back with a bit of amusement in his tone.

"'Yong eyebags mo...pansin ko kasi."

Dumb, Juni. Sa lahat ng pwedeng sabihin ay iyon pa. Syempre, aware na siya na may gan'on sa mukha niya!

Boaz chuckled softly. "Been into a lot of reading contracts lately. May iilan din akong binabasang protocol regarding the title transfer. Dad has been preparing me for it. Do I look ugly with my eyebags?"

Bahagya niya akong nilingon. Nagtama ang aming mga mata. I blinked for a bit and stared into his face. Wala naman akong masabing masama. In fact, he just looked normal but restless. May mga tao talagang hindi mukhang haggard kahit wala ng pahinga.

Umiling ako. "H-hindi naman."

Be still my heart. Pakiramdam ko ang saya-saya ng puso ko ngayon kasi magkasama kami sa iisang sasakyan. Never did I imagine that I would ride in his car, just the two of us. Nakasama ko naman siya sa iisang sasakyan noon at kaibahan lang ay kasama ko rin si Syden. Hati ang atensyon ko madalas pero deep inside, kinikilig naman kasi kasama si Boaz. Iyon lang naman kasi ang alam kong advantage ko sa ibang babaeng nagkakagusto sa kaniya.

Naging tahimik kami pagkaraan ng ilang minuto. Hindi ko na alam tuloy kung ano ang sasabihin. I didn't want to come out as nosy and loud. Kahit mukhang hindi naman nangangain si Boaz, nakakatakot minsan magsalita. Baka may masabi akong mali pagkatapos ay papalabasin ako sa kotse niya.

Napanguso ako nang makitang malapit na kami sa tapat ng apartment na aking tinutuluyan. It was only a studio type apartment at marami pa akong kapitbahay. Ngayon, na-realize ko na talagang magkaiba kami ni Boaz. Even though I landed on a job with a good paying salary, I couldn't afford a condo just like his. Sa kaniya, alam kong nasa high-end condominium siya nakatira. Mahihiya iyong size ng banyo ko sa size ng banyo niya.

Pinagbuksan ako ng pinto ni Boaz. Nang magkaharap na kami, ngumiti ako at nagpasalamat lang. I even prepared my keys to my apartment because I didn't want to waste my time. Gusto ko pang
makita siyang umalis.

"Juni," he lowly called my name. Akmang maglalakad na ako sa tapat ng aking apartment. Nilingon ko siya, nagtatanong ang mga mata.

"Bakit?"

Boaz stared at me. Nakatitig din ako pabalik sa kaniya. May parang nakadagan sa aking dibdib na sanhi para mahirapan akong huminga. I could feel my chest rising and my heart thumping wildly.

"Care to celebrate the rest of the evening with me? We can go for a ride or to some place you want to go," he shrugged his shoulders.

Tulala ako habang nakatingin lamang sa kaniya. I blinked when his words were registered to me. Tinuro ko pa ang aking sarili at mukhang tangang laglag pa ang panga.

"Ako?"

Nilingon ni Boaz ang paligid at ibinalik ang tingin sa akin. "You're the only person I am talking to right now. Of course, ikaw ang inaaya ko," he chuckled.

"What do you say?" he added, putting his hands inside his pockets. "It's Saturday tomorrow and I know it's a non-office day."

"Wait!" Sumenyas ako sa kaniya. Tinalikuran ko pa siya upang makausap ko ang sarili.

I mean! Si Boaz, inaaya ako! This thirty year old man just invited me to go on a ride with him! It's his birthday at bakit ako? Gusto niya ba ako?

Wait, should I really be thinking about that? Malay ko, baka bored lang siya at ako lang ang naisipan niyang isama.

I breathed hard and composed myself. Nilingon ko si Boaz at nginitian.

"Sorry, nagpigil ako ng bahing," I lied smoothly. "Pwede bang magpalit muna ako ng sapatos? Sumasakit ang mga paa ko sa heels na 'to."

I pointed at my feet. Bumaba ang tingin ni Boaz doon. Nakita ko siyang bahagyang napangiti na para bang may nakakatawa roon sa paa ko.

He then replied, "Sure. Take your time, Juni."

Agad akong pumasok sa aking apartment. Humabol pa ulit ako ng paglabas at inaya siyang pumasok sa loob. Wala naman akong dapat ikahiya kasi malinis naman ang apartment ko. Hindi ako umaalis hangga't hindi ko nalilinis. But Boaz declined and said he'll just wait outside.

Inisip ko kung magpapalit ba ako ng damit. I was wearing my work clothes. Formal blouse and a pair of cream trousers. Siguro ay kailangan kong magpalit kasi amoy pawis ako. Sinundo lang naman kasi ako nina Syden mula sa firm. I'll just run a super quick bath. Iyong tipong hindi maghihintay nang matagal si Boaz. Nakakahiya naman ano!

I literally dashed my way out of my apartment. I was clad in a striped jumpsuit and I covered it with a thick jacket. Para naman ang mapapansin lang ni Boaz ay 'yong pagpapalit ko ng pang-ilalim (pero jumpsuit naman talaga) at ang puti kong sapatos.

"You good?" Boaz asked when we both entered his car. I nodded, with a little bit of vigor. Hindi naman ako excited, ano? I'm too old for this kind of giddy feeling but it's Boaz! At wala si Syden kaya hindi niya ako matutukso tungkol sa kapatid.

And besides, there's nothing wrong with two grown-ups going on a late night ride together, right? We're just going to explore. It's not like something would change in a matter of hours after this.

Siguro kailangan niya lang ng kasama. I don't want to assume that Boaz likes to be with me because...why? Hindi naman kami close. Hindi kami palaging nag-uusap kaya wala akong mahanap na rason para magustuhan niya. He rarely sees me.

"Palagi ka bang nagd-drive around the Metro kapag gabi?" tanong ko sa kaniya. It looks like he knows what he's doing, taking turns here and there.

"Back in college. I seldom do this now as I have a heavier responsibility at the company. You? Have you been on a late night drive?" Sinulyapan niya ako.

"Hindi pa at saka wala naman akong kotse. Sayang din sa gas ang ganito," I replied with my utmost sensible answer.

"You're right. But you can afford a second-hand car, right? Maliit lang ang ibabayad."

"Baka malaki rin ang gastos. You'll never know the damage about second-hands. Mukha lang siyang maayos pero kapag ginamit na, may iilang aberya. I mean, what do I expect from a second-hand right? There has to be a problem kaya ibinebenta."

"Or you're just being practical. In fact, the cost of gas is a 'lil costly right now. Mas mabuti pang mag-commute na lang."

I shrugged. "Unlike you, you wouldn't have any problem with those. Para sa akin alam mo na, mabigat iyon sa bulsa."

I smiled a bit. It's been the longest conversation I had with him. Sensible naman pala. In fact, I didn't expect Boaz to be a little argumentative. Kasi kapag nag-uusap sila ni Syden, hindi naman
siya 'yong tipong nangangaral sa kapatid.

"Are you hungry? Do you want coffee?" He stopped for a bit when the traffic light went red. Nilingon ako ni Boaz.

"Coffee sounds great. Pero wala akong masyadong alam na cafe rito."

"We can grab coffee in Tagaytay, if that's what you like. It's up to you."

"Ikaw itong may birthday sa ating dalawa. Your choice. Sabit lang ako sa late night drive mo."

"I invited you so your opinion matters. Hindi lang naman ako ang titikim."

Ugh, Boaz. Bakit ba ganito siya? Bakit sobrang mahinahon niya habang hindi ako mapakali rito? I should stop acting like this because it's unladylike and ungrown-up like.

Pumayag ako sa gusto niya. He drove a little bit faster. Gusto ko nga sanang buksan ang bintana para maramdaman iyong hangin pero baka ayaw niya. Ang ganda pa naman ng view sa labas at
parang bituin ang mga ilaw.

After an hour or so, we arrived at Tagaytay. Boaz navigated his phone, looking for good cafes that were open 24/7. May iilan siyang nakita at nagbabasa rin siya ng mga reviews.

We stopped in front of Charito by Bag of Beans. They had a pretty nice view of the Taal Volcano and was a little bit peaceful compared to those cafes near the highway. May Starbucks nga kaming nadaanan pero ayaw ni Boaz. Siguro ay sawa na siya sa gan'on.

Back in high school, those types of brand would cost me too much. Hindi ko afford iyon gaya ng iilan kong kaklase. I would have to save money for it. Pero ngayong sumusweldo na ako, kaya ko ng bumili. It was worth the penny.

Charito had a classical ambiance, from it's white exterior to a clean modernized interior. The place was well-lit and every touch of its interior design screams modernity and elegance. Plus, the view of the Taal Lake was spectacular. Kahit madilim na, the small volcano was still visible. It was breathtaking.

We were told by the staff that it was a special week for them, kaya naman imbes na hanggang alas dies sila ng gabi ay bukas daw sila hanggang 12 AM.

Nagkatinginan kami ni Boaz. "Aren't we lucky?" he remarked sheepishly.

We chose to sit near the balcony, where the overlooking view of the Taal Volcano is located. Kahit
naka jacket ako, ramdam ko 'yong lamig na parang nanunuot sa aking balat. My face was a little
bit warm. Hinawakan ko ang aking pisngi habang nakatingin sa view ng Taal.

I wanted to take a picture pero baka kapag ini-post ko marami ang magtatanong kung bakit ako
nakaabot sa Tagaytay na gabing-gabi na. Alam ng mga kaibigan ko na hindi naman ako palalabas
tuwing gabi at wala rin naman akong sasakyan.

"Do you want to take a picture?" As if he read my mind, Boaz asked. Agad akong napatingin sa
kaniya.

"Hindi na. I mean, madilim naman kaya baka hindi kita."

"Then, how about the place? Ayaw mong kumuha ng litrato? I'm willing to take your picture Juni."

I didn't know why I agreed. Basta't nakita ko lang ang sarili ko na nakangiti na habang kinukuhanan niya ng litrato. It was shameless of me to even use his phone for the picture. He's got an iPhone and everyone knows it could capture the best ones. Wala akong tiwala sa cellphone ko at baka magloko pa kapag si Boaz ang gumamit.

We had some frappe and a blueberry cheesecake. Mukha kaming nagde-date na dalawa at nagpresenta pa nga ang isa sa mga staff na kuhanan kami ng picture. I wanted to laugh. Boaz looked like he was just done doing a magazine photoshoot. His button down shirt says it all. Hindi nakatulong na bukas ang naunang dalawang butones. His hair was a bit dishevelled. At ako, mukha
akong patatas dahil sa suot kong jacket.

"Palagi ka ba sa Tagaytay? What's your favorite place?" tanong ko sa kaniya.

"I'd say I don't have a favorite. As long as they have good coffee, I'm good."

"Anong paborito mong kape?" dagdag ko.

"Black coffee. No sugar. Makes life simpler."

There was a hot beverage on the menu. He could have ordered a brewed coffee but he chose to order frappe instead. Ayaw kong bigyan ng malisya at baka naman gusto niyang sumubok ng bago.

"You?" balik tanong niya sa akin. "Do you like sweets?"

"I do, pero hindi 'yong sobra. Ayaw kong magka-diabetes."

He chuckled in amusement. "I figured. You and Syd always have a sweet tooth."

Pinakatitigan ko siya. Who would have thought that I'd spend my free time with Boaz Costello? Not just a free time but it's his birthday. He wanted the few hours left to celebrate it with me. I was
nothing special. Hindi kami close. I was just his sister's best friend that's why I don't really see any reason as to why he would invite me at this time of the day.

I felt like I knew him more this time. I know he likes driving fast but would do a moderate speed when he's with someone. He likes his coffee black but would try another type instead. He asks sensible questions. He likes talking. His favorite band was Coldplay (he smiled for a bit when the song Yellow played on the background). And he mentioned that it was one of his favorites from the band. He likes editing pictures, something that I caught him doing while we were eating.

Hindi ko alam ang mga bagay na iyon simula nang magkakilala kami. I only know him as the smart and handsome overprotective brother of my best friend. An heir to their company, an
achiever...the favorite one I must say. Kaya ang mga tipikal na bagay na nabanggit ko ay wala man lang kalaban-laban sa mga nalaman ko ngayon.

And like the return of Autumn, I was slowly falling for the bare Boaz Costello. And it was merely not an infatuation. I am too old for that word.

"Juni," he called my name when he dropped me off in front of my apartment at 2 am. Unlike the chilling breeze of Tagaytay, Manila had a seeping warmth. Iyong tipong mamamawis agad ako dahil sa kapal ng jacket na aking suot.

It didn't help that Boaz was calling my name softly.

"Hmm?" I stared at his face.

Tapos na ang kaniyang birthday kaya matatapos na rin iyong mini celebration niya. He's officially a 30-year-old guy.

"You don't have a boyfriend, right?" aniya sa akin. Tila nasamid ako sa sariling laway nang sabihin niya iyon.

He went to me and even patted my back.

"Sorry. Shit, that was rude of me!" aniya na sising-sisi.

Hawak ko ang aking dibdib. "Ang sama mo naman! Porke't ba single ako, kailangan pang itanong?" I said, a little bit joking. Hindi ko inalintana na ang lapit namin sa isa't isa. I can smell
his woodsy scent.

"No!" He was laughing, too.

"And to answer your question, wala akong boyfriend. Since birth at baka may balak pang i-forever ni Lord."

"Care to tell my why you don't have one?" aniya at lumayo sa akin.

Humalukipkip ako at napanguso. Pwede ko bang sabihin na dahil sa kaniya kaya wala? In fact, I couldn't find a guy like Boaz. Siguro kung may nakita man ako, agad kong sasabihin na hindi naman Boaz ang pangalan kaya pass pa rin.

But...yeah. It was because of him. Boaz is like my ideal guy. And I wanted destiny to deal with my love life rather than me, making a move on my own. Alam ko naman kasing walang pag-asa kapag uunahan ko.

I wanted fate to tie the threads together—to pull us closer. Like a falling leaf in Autumn, I wanted to fall naturally. I wanted him to fall naturally as time flies. As soon as he noticed me.

I believe in the divine fate. That if God wants you to be with a right man, He'll find a way. Totoong nasa Diyos ang awa at nasa tao ang gawa...pero hindi ko magawang kumilos para pangunahan ang nararamdaman. Because what if I was wrong all along? That he wasn't the one for me and that Boaz will be the one to lead me to the right guy?

Pero siguro naman, tama na ito. Nasa tamang edad na ako para kumilos dahil kung wala akong gagawin, baka habang-buhay ko ring pagsisihan.

"Kasi alam kong may nakatadhanang tama para sa akin. Right now, I haven't seen the right one. It's not like I was looking," I rolled my eyes.

"Ikaw?" balik tanong ko. "Why did you invite me tonight? Wala ka bang girlfriend na sasama
sa'yo?"

"If I have, I wouldn't be here with you right now," he straightforwardly replied while staring into my eyes.

My lips parted as my breathing hitched. Pakiramdam ko ay nagbubuhol-buhol na ang aking mga ugat dahil sa bilis ng tibok ng puso. Mabilis na kumalat ang init sa aking pisngi nang ihiwalay ko
ang tingin sa kaniya.

"I'm thirty now, without a girlfriend. Everyone expects me to have one and just like you, I couldn't find the right one. I thought it would be easy since you know? Not my words but people said I have it all. I wouldn't have any problem with choosing a woman for me."

"Bakit? Ano bang hinahanap mo?"

"Someone independent. Someone practical, smart, knows her thoughts, her self, and her decisions. A lot could be beautiful and rich, but confidence and recognizing self-worth is rare. And s much as I want her to depend on me, I'd like to see an independent woman."

Napatitig ako sa kaniya. My heart thumped so hard when I caught him staring at me. Please lang, ayaw ko talagang mag-assume sa mga ganitong bagay. Alam kong sinasabi niya lang ang gusto niya. Gusto niya lang sagutin ang tanong ko.

"Juni, you don't have a boyfriend——

"Kailangang ulitin? Kailangang ipamukha?" I sarcastically cut him off.

Boaz chuckled softly. "What I meant was you don't have one and I don't have a girlfriend. Would it be possible that we date?"

"Bakit? Gusto mo ba ako?" matapang kong tanong.

"And if I admit that I like you, will you make me your boyfriend?"

"So gusto mo nga ako?" I grinned sheepishly. Ibinalik niya ang ngising iyon.

"I do. Very much. I just described you a little while ago."

Suminghap ako at sandaling natawa. "Sure ka ba?"

Boaz nodded with a smile. "99.9%"

Tumaas ang aking kilay. "Nasaan ang 0.1%?"

He looked away, slightly becoming bashful. "That...might mean a percentage that I might have fallen for you."

Nanginig ang labi ko sa tuwa. Agad kong kinagat iyon para hindi niya makita na kinilig ako sa kaniyang sinabi. Ang tanda mo na Juni! Lalagpas ka na sa kalendaryo sa susunod na tatlong taon!

"So?" He raised a brow. "Do I have a chance?"

Lumapit ako sa kaniya. He kept on staring at me. Nagkunwari akong chine-check ang kabuuan niya. I shamelessly eyed his face and his body. He looked confident with what he has and even made a model pose. Sandaling napatawa ako.

"Since kaka-birthday mo palang naman at wala akong regalo sa'yo, then maybe I could make myself as a gift for your thirtieth birthday. How does that sound?" ngumisi ako at tiningala siya.

Boaz smiled at me. "Perfect."