Cliché #59: the author's note before the start of the book

"Don't plagiarize my story or I will hunt you down, cut off your dick/boob, force feed it to you, and then stick a grenade up your ass." What the fuck, calm down I get that you don't want people copying your story but that is graphic as fuck

"Ok so this story might sound cliché but I swear it's not! It's unique!" Mm okay sure

"Lol this story sucks I don't know why you all would want to read this shit" *low key wants you to read their book though* *book probably has 6 million views*