3pointt14 presents: Overthinking Overthinking Overthinking

Overthinking, overthinking, overthinking.

You do that, don't you?

When I was a kid, I spent hours in bed—not sleeping—but having imaginary experiences and conversations. My 'What if' scenarios were nightmares disguised as daydreams because I was building expectations and setting myself up for disappointment, knowing those scenarios wouldn't actually happen.

Now that I'm much older, wiser, more articulate and experienced in life,

I still do the exact same fucking thing,

but on a micro level.

Exhibit A: I'm a Text Analyst; I overanalyze my texts like crazy. For example, I obsess whether or not using a period is important.

"Why did they use a period? Do they hate me? Did I say something wrong? Maybe I should call up my friend and spend an hour discuss all possible meanings of this single text for the next two hours.

...

Yes. That seems like a good use of my time."

There are countless times I overthink about something that isn't worth it and I'm sucked into this mind numbing trap made up of obsession and horrific stress.

As someone who regularly self-reflects, I tend to see my life in retrospect when I'm lying in bed or waiting at the bus stop. I think about what I did that day, who I interacted with and what I could've said or done to make that situation better or, usually, less embarrassing (I have nineteen years of proof that God has a sense of humour; my life). 

But there is a strong difference between insightful reflection and overthinking.

Self-reflection can turn from being productive into something harmful once you begin to think negatively, which can carry into self-loathing and as a result, drop you into a negative feedback loop.

Ruminating can be habitual, which rewires the brain and can perpetuate depression, sleeping problems, anxiety and self-harm. 

And as people who rethink situations because we want to better ourselves for the future, the last thing we need is to hurt ourselves in the process. The only expenses to self-growth should be growing pains like heartbreak or the exhausting climb up the mountain of insecurities we need to overcome in order to accept ourselves as who we are. We shouldn't have any more burdens—life is already busy enough.

My favourite Youtuber shared a quote that changed my outlook on overthinking, and I'm excited to share it with you: 

Your psychological response to an event is actually more important than what happened to you.

Read it again because the best things come in twos (like Cole and Dylan Sprouse).

Your psychological response to an event is actually more important than what happened to you.

In other words: How you respond to what happened, is more powerful and important, than what literally happened.

Exhibit B: When someone breaks up with you, what can do you the most harm?

The fact that the person left you,

Or, your thoughts on the fact that they left you.

You don't need to be the next Marvel hero to discover your own superpowers. Your mind is the most powerful force you can control.

How do you control your mind to stop overthinking? How do you control your thoughts? 

Young fools accept responsibility for their actions. Mature souls accept responsibility for their thoughts.

Control your mind by learning to accept responsibility for your thoughts, and naturally, you will accept responsibility for your own happiness too.

Your psychological response is something you can control as opposed to what the other person did to you. 

In any situation you're in, say aloud what factors you can control. It will change your perspective and help you focus your energy on the factors that are in your power (Go self-empowerment!).  

But habits can't just change overnight. What other things can you do to stop overthinking?

1.     Be Active & Get Busy

Take your dog for a walk or let your dog walk you. Get those gains at the gym to distress, or if endurance and strength isn't your forte, train your mind by meditating with the Headspace app. Practice mindfulness by joining a yoga class.

You're overthinking because you're literally giving yourself time to overthink. Take on a new hobby like, discover a new book, or hang out with a friend.

2.     Focus on what you can do better next time.

After a Weights Gone Wild episode at the gym and you reread your favourite book series for the second tie, and you still can't seem to shake off the thought, think about the event in a positive light.

Instead of constantly telling myself, "I suck. I did something wrong", I find the point where I went wrong and strategize a way where if the same event occurs again, I know what I can do differently to better the situation and prevent myself from being in the same position I'm in now. 

Practice the mantra, rephrase it if it helps you better:

Your psychological response is more important than the actual event that happened.

When I tell people about my solution to overthinking, I like to reword it in a way where I understand it best:

Your thoughts, can do more harm to yourself, than the person that actually hurt you.

Sometimes, I think about why I'm overthinking about an event.

When you understand why something really hurts, it stops hurting.

So I ask myself, why am I letting these thoughts hurt me? 

People always tell me it's because I care about a certain person or my relationship with them. If you ever feel you are overthinking because it stems from love and your compassion for someone, ask yourself what is more important: Your health; self-love or your love for someone else.

I'm pretty sure if its real love, that person wouldn't want you to put yourself through the dangers of dwelling at the expense of their actions.

The reason you think about it so much, the reason you care so much, even worry so much is because there still exists between you and life, a passionate love affair.

And because of this, everything is going to be just fine.

Cheers from your favourite type of pie,

Xoxo

3.14, Azia

P.S. Comment what you overthink about! Do you overthink?

I post Daily Empowering Messages to my readers and the feedback has been amazing:

"I look forward to them actually, they make me feel confident and brave enough to take on the day." - @Going Somewhere01

"I believe those empowering messages you post spread positivity. They have a way of putting a smile on your face." - Ni233

"This was the first thing that I saw when I logged onto Wattpad. It was very much needed. Thank you very much." - FeelingsAreChosen

It is my passion to share motivational and self-empowerment lessons to help you conquer your day!

So I recently launched my mind-positive project on my profile called: Emotions. LOL. Sincerely, Asia. where I take these daily empowering messages and turn them into a book about positive ways to deal with life.

We're a reading and writing community and it's about time we start to make it not only a realm to escape in, but one to help us make life less of a place to need escape from.

Join the positive movement on Wattpad by reading: Emotions. LOL. Sincerely, Asia. and know you're not alone.

Get ready to feel even more brave and confident than you've ever felt!

You deserve to live your life the best way you can.

Because you matter.

wattpad: 3pointt14

Ig: @azia_meri

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