Eli

For days, weeks even, I hadn't been in a party mood.

My brain felt like a mush of emotions and thoughts that I can't seem to sort through, which has pushed me to lock myself away in the comfort of my bedroom. Either that or I would obsessively hover around the Baxter house in hopes of seeing her.

It needs to stop. I can't help but wonder what Noah would do if he could take a peek in my head and see the thoughts I have about his little sister. Would he kill me? Disown me as his best friend? Or maybe support my feelings for her?

Don't be ridiculous. Of course he wouldn't be the ultimate plot twist and encourage the idea of Sage and I together, even though I wish that was the case. But, first I'd have to overcome being a coward by just observing her from a distance like a fucking weirdo and pursue something real.

Noah has been more than suspicious -- concerned -- my subconscious corrects, about my behavior lately. He took the opportunity of his parents being out of town for their wedding anniversary to throw a party, and forced me to attend.

I would have been over his house anyway, but the thought of a party didn't appeal to me like it used to. Especially since I knew Sage wouldn't show her face at something like this. But her brother is relentless, even more so since he's noticed my usual uplifting personality is down in the dumps.

Normally I'd be all about going to every single party that was thrown, it didn't matter. As long as I could get wasted and hook up with any girl who was willing, it was a good time. It was a way for me to push that cute blonde haired girl to the back of my mind, so I could forget about how badly I wanted it to be her by my side, hand clutched in mine so I could show her off to the world.

"Do you want another beer, baby?" The nasally voice of a brunette perched on Noah's lap floated around and I had to keep myself from rolling my eyes.

He's lying not only to himself but everyone who cares about him. If he thinks he's fooling me, then he's dead wrong. I can see the way it sickens him to wrap his arms around her lithe waist, and the wince he tries to disguise when she plants her lips on his.

It's nothing serious, just another hook up, but I've noticed over the years how I'm not the only one using girls to hide my true wants. And I want nothing more than for him to feel comfortable enough to share his true sexuality with me, even though he continues to hide it.

The way he looks at his sisters best friend, Jordan, could make anyone melt on the spot, and I have to admit; it's utterly adorable. Noah is like my brother, and just want him happy...

Maybe one day.

I'm not going to push him, I'll give him the time to sort it out. But to aid the awkwardness I crack a joke, "If you're offering, I'll take one too." I playfully wink at the girl, the lot of us erupting in laughter as she scowls in embarrassment.

Noah offers me a thankful smile and my lip twitches, sending him a nod. I'll always have your back bud, doesn't matter who you love.

Out of the corner of my eye I notice Owen hastily rise from his seat, heading towards the kitchen.

Wondering where the hell he's going I try to follow his movements but I'm interrupted due to a slight slap on my arm by the girl on my lap. Her brown eyes narrow in on my face, overly glossed lips twisted down in a frown.

"Don't be rude, Eli." Sabrina scolds, shaking her head before taking a swig of her drink.

I sigh, wanting nothing more than for her to not be in my line of vision. I don't want her here, on my lap, or anywhere near me, I just want Sage. But I couldn't have Noah prying anymore than he already has, and this seemed to be the best decoy.

With a shrug, my expression void of any emotion, "I was just kidding. She needs to get a sense of humor."

"She was just trying to be nice." She counters, and I want to say, 'I know' but I don't bother, in fact I don't reply at all.

Sabrina is a nice girl, I suppose. She has many who look up to her, or want to be her, but she lacks in the personality department, and we have absolutely nothing in common. Our conversations don't go very far. She's attractive, but she's nothing in comparison to Sage who could make me fall to my knees with just a glance.

Feeling my curiosity get the better of me, I once again peer around Noah to see where Owen ran off to and as soon as my eyes land on them I feel an unhealthy amount of rage course through me.

He's showing off his pearly white teeth, smiling teasingly at her while snapping his fingers as if to remember something, Sage giving him all her attention. That should be me. Hell, I had no idea she was even home, let alone downstairs.

I know that look he's giving her. Hell would freeze over before I let him take advantage of her; it's just a game for him, and I can't let Sage be apart of that. She'll only get her heart broken.

"I'll be right back." I grumble, abruptly lifting Sabrina -- our first psychical contact of the night -- to sit her back down on the sofa. She questions where I'm going but my tunnel vision is only focused on one thing.

I dodge in and out of the throngs of people to cross the threshold of the kitchen, neither of them even noticing I'm there until I speak up.

"What's going on over here?" My voice nearly comes out as a snarl, tossing my arm around Sage's shoulder to pull her questionably closer to me.

I hold back a relieved puff of air when I feel her body flush against mine, instantly relaxing at my touch. Her dough eyes peer up, and I can practically feel the admiration in them which warms my heart.

"'Nothing much, I was just talking to Noah's little sister." Owen replies, instantly causing my anger to return with a vengeance. "And telling her how pretty she is."

Stay calm, you don't want to scare Sage. I repeat to myself over and over in my head, wanting to punch his front teeth in so he knows to never come near her again. Not while I'm still alive and breathing at least.

I grit my teeth, fingers curling around her shoulder to assure myself that she's here, in my arms. "Oh yeah? And what do you think Noah would do if he found out you're flirting with his little sister?"

"Take a chill pill, man." Owen frowns, slapping his hand down on my back in a friendly pat, but it only makes my blood boil more. "It was all innocent fun."

My entire body is shaking with enmity, "Sage isn't fun." I growl, not caring if I'm threatening someone I consider a friend. "And you should fuck off before I let her brother know."

I almost think I see amusement swirl around in Owens eyes as he throws his hands up in mock surrender, moving backwards. "Fine, jesus." He says under his breath, mumbling one last thing before removing himself from my sight all together. "Fucking lovesick, dick."

He's right. Am I that obvious?

Instantly that comforting warmth that she brings me dissipates into thin air. Sage forcefully pulls herself out of my iron grasp, whipping around to face me with a frown and a fierce fire in her irises.

"What the hell is wrong with you — Eli!"

Her small shriek brings an unstoppable smile to my face when I lift her off the ground to throw her curvy body over my shoulder. I couldn't stand here another second and listen to her yell at me for being overprotective and possessive, we need to be alone.

Her cute little fists pound at my back, ordering, "Put me down his instant!" But I merely chuckle under my breath, feeling a burst of butterflies flutter around in my stomach. This is the closest we've been to each other.

As I walk to her room I couldn't care less about the attention we're attracting, and I certainly don't mind if they know that its Sage I'm dragging up the stairs.

Slamming her door behind us I gracefully place her back on her feet, smiling slyly when she shuts her eyes while swaying lightly from side to side in attempts to get her bearings straight.

I wish it could stay like this, just the comfortable silence while I admire her like the lovesick puppy I am. But, all good things must come to an end I suppose, because when she looks at me again I immediately drop the amused simper.

"What the fuck?" She exclaims, throwing her arms up in the air for dramatic effect.

It doesn't matter how undeniably adorable she is, the utter rage soaring through me isn't going anywhere. I huff, "Owen is a dick, a total player. I was just saving you the heartbreak."

"I never asked you to do that!"

In that moment I don't think either of us had realized how close we are, her pink pouty lips looking more inviting as the seconds tick by. It's becoming more difficult to hold myself back as I subconsciously lean further in with each passing moment, feeling my pride inflate when she doesn't object.

It hits me like a freight train that I'm all her's, and I realize that when her lips fit around mine, sending a sparkling shock through my body that is hands down the best feeling I've ever experienced.

Inhaling deeply I wish I would have done this months, years, ago. It was always a want stirring in the deep pits of my stomach, but I always convinced myself that she is too good for me. I don't deserve such an amazing person.

I've waited too long for this.

Worry creeps in when Sage doesn't move a muscle, utterly frozen to her spot in what I can only hope is shock and not disgust.

When my callused finger tips find the soft skin of her jaw, drawing random shapes she finally responds. Her lips move softly against my own, hands clutching the bottom of my teeshirt as I feverishly take it to the next level, using all my self-control to not throw her on that bed and never stop kissing her.

The moment our tongues tangle together I nearly lose it, my lips quirking up slightly as I try to memorize what she tastes like, afraid we may never have a moment like this ever again.

My body is still buzzing, traveling all the way through my veins almost like firecrackers, gently letting my hands roam her body so I can remember every single inch. Finally able to release the instinct I've been fighting for years to just grab her and never let go.

Our embrace will end, and I'm not sure what will happen after but all I want to focus on is this; her.

Chaos from the party is muffled all the way up here, and it's almost like I can forget the world when such a beautiful girl is in my arms, but the thoughts start to slowly make their way in, no matter how hard I try to keep them away.

I can't do this to her — she is too good for me.

I feel dizzy, like I'm going through withdrawals when I pull away, wanting to curl her back up in my arms and shield her away from the world to feel like I'm complete again. A small huff comes from Sage, her body drifting closer to mine as I watch her with sad eyes for only a second.

I know, baby, I feel the same.

Then I'm gone, convincing myself that it can never happen again, no matter how much I want it to. And I make the biggest mistake of my life that night, regretting that I ever left her standing in the middle of her room, alone.

I should have stayed with her. 

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