It took a good six months of therapy before I noticed that you were gradually changing. I knew you had a long way to go and you would likely be in therapy for years. But you were starting to let go of pieces of your past, once and for all. I loved you so much already, but I loved seeing real parts of you coming to the surface now that they weren't oppressed by years of guilt and hatred. 

Like that fact that you loved to sing. I came home to our apartment one day and I heard you through the door. I didn't want to disturb you, but I wanted to hear what you were singing. I opened the door quietly and I crept in. You didn't even notice me because you were so lost in the music.

You were playing something on a small electric keyboard that I hadn't seen before. You were singing parts of a song that you kept repeating as if you were trying to get them just right. You stopped on occasion and jotted things down onto a sheet of paper.

You were writing a song?!

I watched for a long time, mesmerized that you possessed the skills to sing, play and write.

Finally, I made my presence known and you were quite startled at the sound of my voice.

"Hello, love. I didn't see you there," you said as your face turned crimson and you tried to put away the evidence of your song writing.

"What are you doing?" I asked. "Why are you trying to hide those from me?"

"Well, it's been a long time and I'm not very good, really," you said.

"Obviously, you didn't hear what I just heard. You're amazing, and your voice is phenomenal. How did I not know that you had such talent?"

You shrugged as if I was being overly gracious, but I insisted, "Zayn, you are really good! Where did you get the piano?"

"Second hand shop," you answered.

I sat down next to you and begged quietly. "Please play something for me."

"I'm really not that good," you countered.

"You are good, but I love you so it doesn't matter even if you're horrible. Play something," I demanded and I wrapped my arms around your waist.

You hesitantly began to play and I laughed as I recognized "Chopsticks."

"Zayn! Play something more sophisticated, would you?" I said, still giggling. "I know you can do better than that."

You started to play something that I didn't know, and then you sang so quietly along with the notes that I could hardly hear you.

"Louder," I encouraged you.

Your voice grew a little louder and I was mesmerized by the deep and rich quality of it. When you ended the song, I gave you a little squeeze and said, "How did you learn to sing like that? And play the piano? Why didn't you ever tell me that you played?"

"I guess I thought I would never play again. I used to be in the school choir, for quite a long time, actually. And I had piano lessons every week for at least six years. I stopped doing anything I loved after my parents died. I never thought I would enjoy doing anything again, you know. I just figured that the rest of my life would just be me, trying to escape the nightmares."

I caressed your cheek with my hand. You had a little stubble on your chin and I loved the way it grazed against my fingers.

"I never thought I could love you more than I already do, but I keep seeing new facets of you and I love every single one. Kind of like a tree that's been dormant for the winter; it looks like it's dead, but there is life inside. Now, with a little sunshine, some water and some pruning, you're coming back to life."

"Don't forget love," you said, turning your body on the chair so you were directly facing me. I swung my leg around to face you as well. "I wouldn't be here without your love. And I mean that. I mean, I might be here in Grand Forks, but I never would have gotten this far if you hadn't loved me and cared for me so well for the past several months. I would never have remembered the things I used to love about my life. They would still be buried under the ashes of my past."

You kissed me tenderly, passionately, but not lustfully. It was a sweet kiss, communicating the fullness of your love to me.

"I wouldn't be where I am today either, with you. I think we'll both grow and flourish in new ways because we found each other."

You slipped your arms around my waist and pulled me tightly against you, my head resting on your chest. It was enough just to hold each other, listening to each other's breaths, feeling each other's heartbeats.

When we went to bed that night and we'd already turned the lights out, your voice found me in the dark. "River?"

"Yeah?"

"How much longer do you think we should wait until we get married?"

The question gave me delightful butterflies in my stomach. I couldn't wait to marry you, but Dr. Conyers had strongly recommended that we wait until you were making some progress in therapy before we got married. And now you were.

"I will marry you tomorrow, if you'd like," I said with a little giggle in my voice. Then you rolled over suddenly and pulled me against you, rolling me on top of you.

"Is that so?" You asked. I could hear the smirk in your voice.

"Yes, but my family would disown me. We don't have to do anything big. I've never had a lot of friends, and neither one of us has much family...Oh, I'm sorry, that really sounded bad, didn't it?"

"It's all right," you said, kissing my forehead. "It's true. You're my family now."

"Maybe we could plan something small so it won't take long to make the arrangements. And I know exactly where I want to have our honeymoon." I paused, hoping you would take a guess.

Then both of us at once said, "The cabin!"

I stayed that way, lying on your chest for a while, and you let your fingers comb through my long hair. I drifted off feeling peaceful and happy.

The next morning was Saturday, a day we both loved because we usually didn't have to work and we could just cuddle in our pajamas on the couch while we drank coffee or tea and watched kids playing in the park across from our apartment. It was September, so it was still quite warm, but I knew that the temperate days were fleeting. Soon, we would be met by wind and falling leaves, and eventually, snow. I found myself greatly anticipating the snow, because it reminded me of our time at the cabin. We both wanted to go back, but with work and going through therapy, we just hadn't found the time yet.

I was bustling around in the kitchen, pouring my second cup of coffee when I heard your teasing voice. "Are you coming back, love? I'm getting cold."

I grinned at you; honestly, I loved that you were so playful and affectionate with me. I went and set my coffee down, but before I sat down, you quickly said, "Can you please go and get the paper?"

I frowned at you because I didn't want to go outside in my pajamas. I decided just to throw on my bathrobe, which was too warm for September, but at least it was modest enough for me to leave the apartment. I ran down the steps, quickly fetched the newspaper and brought it back inside, playfully tossing it at you.

"Now, come sit down and let's read it together," you suggested.

I looked at you in confusion. "I'd much rather read poetry together...."

"We can do that later," you promised. "But just come and sit by me, please."

Of course, I sat next to you because I loved being close to you.

You opened the paper and began reading headlines.

"Ah, interesting," you said. "Man Adopts Giant Burmese Python Found In Toilet. Hmm."

"Seriously?" I asked. "Grand Forks has nothing better to write about?"

"Grand Forks Man Says He Played Bridge with Big Foot and His Buddies."

"Shut up!" I laughed. "It doesn't really say that, does it?"

You ignored me and kept reading. "Man Trashes Psychic's Car After She Predicts that He Will Have Sex with 85-year-old Woman."

"Zayn!" I said, practically howling with laughter. "What are you reading?!"

You finally laughed a little bit with me and said, "It's a spoof newspaper. They do it as a fundraiser to help homeless children."

"Oh, right, I've read some of those before. I didn't know it was coming out today."

"But, wait," you said. "Here's something that I'm quite certain is true."

"Really?" I said sarcastically. "And what makes you say that?"

"Just listen," you commanded. "Zayn Malik Wants to Marry The Girl He Was Thought to Have Kidnapped. That's SO interesting."

You kept reading without waiting for the information to sink in.

"Wait, does it really say that?" I asked.

You showed me the paper and sure enough, there was the headline, proclaiming your love for me.

"How did you do that?" I started to question you, but you interrupted me, saying, "Here, hold this side."

You put the right edge of the paper in my hand. "And I'll hold this side over here so we can read together." You made quite a show out of grabbing your side of the newspaper and stretching it between us as if we were putting it on display. "Okay, now, would you like to do the honor of turning the page?"

I ceremoniously turned the page and then let my hand drop back to my side, but you grabbed it and squeezed it tight. The next full page was taken up by these ten words:

River Tatum

Will You Be My Wife?

Love,

Zayn Malik

As I was scanning over those words again and again, practically hyperventilating with excitement, I felt you slide something onto my finger. I looked down and found a silver infinity ring with a diamond in the middle, simple yet stunning.

I laughed and cried at the same time. I dropped the paper and brought my hand to my mouth, still shaking with emotion.

"Well, love, I need an answer or I'll have to have that ring back," you said, trying to hide your smile.

"Yes, I'll marry you! Yes, yes, yes! You've known the answer to that for a long time, and so have I!"

"How's that?" You asked. "You only met me last winter."

"I always knew I'd marry my perfect match. I just didn't find you until last year. Actually, you found me. Over and over again."

"So glad I did," you whispered, pulling me close to yourself and pressing your lips solidly against mine. Then I wrapped my arms around your neck for a long, long time and let you hold me.

We were interrupted by my phone ringing. I was met with my mother's excited voice. "River! Did you see today's paper?!" She was practically screaming, which prompted me to start laughing again.

"Yes, Mom, I did."

"Did you say yes?" She inquired seriously.

I started laughing even harder. "What do you think, Mom? Of course, I did!"

Then she screamed so loud that Zayn could hear her. "I can't wait to plan a wedding!" She shrieked.

"Okay, Mom, but it will be kind of small."

We talked for a few minutes more and then I told her I'd call her soon about wedding planning.

"So, we were just talking about this last night, and yet the proposal showed up in today's paper. How did that happen?" I asked you.

"Well, I planned ahead and just hoped you'd say yes."

"You knew I'd say yes!" I teased.

"Yes, I did."

We took just over two months to plan our simple wedding, but it still seemed interminably long. I would have been happy to go to the justice of the peace the day after you proposed, but my mom was thrilled to be able to go dress shopping with me, and pick out cakes and choose colors for my one  bridesmaid.

Over the ten months that we'd been together, we had discussed the possibility of returning to England to visit, so you could show me your home through your eyes. Or we toyed with the idea of living there so there would be a smaller chance of one of us accidentally telling the truth, as we had done a number of times and managed to cover it up. But we gradually learned to stick to the story, and we started to believe it ourselves, too. Living in England would mean living with ghosts, and you didn't need that. We both wanted to be close to our family because family was still important to us, despite our past disappointments.

I still hadn't gathered up the courage to tell you that I'd burned your journal. As far as you knew, it was still safe at the cabin. I knew you'd forgive me, but I was heartbroken that it was gone, and I'm sure you would be sad about it, too.

The day of our wedding arrived and it was a blur, to be honest. Kassie was my one and only bridesmaid and the maid of honor. Nolan stood at your side as the best man.

We got married in a tiny chapel, even though neither of us had been raised with much religion in our lives. We had talked about exploring some kind of faith as a married couple, so that we could raise our children with a moral compass. I was open to the idea, especially since we'd read the Song of Songs. Before that, I had no idea that such passion existed in the Bible. But if there was indeed a God who orchestrated our life and our meeting, and who also created the passion expressed within marriage, I wanted to thank Him personally!

The ceremony was quick and the reception was held in a private room at a local restaurant. You and I couldn't stop smiling the whole day. It was hard to tear my eyes away from you, so unbelievably handsome in your black suit.

The best surprise for our wedding day was when you sang a song that you had written for me. I knew I heard you putting little bits and pieces of it together. But it still completely swept me away when I heard you sing it just for me.

I got a heart and I got a soul
Believe me I will use them both
We made a start
Be it a false one, I know
Baby, I don't want to feel alone

So kiss me where I lay down,
my hands pressed to your cheeks
A long way from the playground

I have loved you since we were 18
Long before we both thought the same thing
To be loved, to be in love
All I can do is say that these arms were made for holding you

I smiled, remembering that I said that to you in the hospital after you put your hand through the window.

I wanna love like you made me feel
When we were 18

We took a chance
God knows we tried
Yet all along, I knew we'd be fine

So pour me a drink
Oh love, let's split the night wide open and we'll see everything
We can live in love in slow motion, motion, motion

So kiss me where I lay down, my hands press to your cheeks
A long way from the playground

I have loved you since we were 18
Long before we both thought the same thing
To be loved and to be in love
And all I can do is say that these arms are made for holding you, ooh
And I wanna love like you made me feel
When we were 18
When we were 18
Oh lord, when we were 18

Kiss me where I lay down, my hands press to your cheeks
A long way from the playground

I have loved you since we were 18
Long before we both thought the same thing
To be loved and to be in love
And all I can do is say that these arms were made for holding you
I want a love like you made me feel
When we were 18
I want a love like you made me feel
When we were 18
I want a love like you made me feel
When we were 18

When you finished, I was weeping in happiness. It was so beautiful, you were so beautiful.

There was a very small area cleared in the room for a dance floor. As we had our first dance together, I decided, for whatever reason, that this was the time to tell you about the journal.

"Zayn, I have to tell you something," I said quietly. "And I'm afraid that you'll be mad at me."

You looked at me like I was certifiably insane. "That's impossible."

"When you were arrested at the cabin, I took your journal with me so the police wouldn't find it when they searched the place. But when we got to Grand Forks, and I couldn't convince anyone to believe that you weren't a kidnapper, I knew I had to get rid of the journal before anyone found it and used it against you. So, I...." I swallowed hard. "I burned it."

Your eyes showed a hint of surprise, but nothing remotely like anger. Instead, you kissed my cheek and then whispered into my ear, "That's okay, love. From now on, we'll write our story together."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And that, my friends, is the end of "Watched."

There will also be an epilogue.

"18" is one of my favorite songs by One Direction. All credit for the song and music goes to One Direction, Ed Sheeran, and the rest of One Direction's team.