"Maybe you who condemn me are in greater fear than I who am condemned."― Giordano Bruno

•••

Bird sat on a couch in the study of Wayne Manor, mindlessly passing her engagement ring back and forth between her hands as she stared at the spot on the opposite couch where her birth mother had once sat.

It had been over a week since she'd met Lily and to her knowledge; the woman who claimed, with tears in her eyes, that all she wanted to do was get to know her daughter –hadn't reached out to her again.

Of course, there had been more than a few to her cellphone from numbers that she didn't recognize, but she'd not answered them thinking it was more than likely Barbara Kean calling her again; acting as if nothing was wrong between them.

She couldn't help but to think of the irony of it all.
As a child all she'd wanted was to meet her biological parents and learn about where she came from –then as an adult she met both of them and found herself wishing she'd never known the truth.

Once you know something, you can't go back –something she'd learned long ago and that still rang true.

"Starling." Bruce greeted as he entered the room and saw his older sister.

His cheeks were tinted red and his hair was messy along with noticeable sweat stains on the oversized gray sweatshirt she was wearing.

"Still training with Alfred?" She guessed as she stood up.

"Yes." He nodded, proudly adding, "I'm improving."

She offered up a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.

"I was starting to think you weren't coming by." He admitted. She'd ignored him the last several times he'd tried to call her.

"I've been dealing with a lot lately." She vaguely shrugged.

Bruce looked down to where she was still passing her ring between her hands. His eyebrows lowered, "Is everything okay?"

Quickly sliding the ring back onto her finger, she lied, "Yeah, things are great."

Before he had the chance to question her more about it or call out the lie he'd easily spotted, Bird changed the subject, "You said you needed to show me something... about dad."

A smug smile toyed at the corner of his lips when he reminded her, "You remember when I went to Wayne Enterprises and Lucius Fox told me how dad was a stoic, that he kept his best self hidden?"

"Yep." Bird remembered, "Then you started destroying this room looking for secrets."

"I found something." He beamed, as he picked a book up off the desk and it flipped it open to show the pages had been hollowed out to create a perfect hiding spot for a small remote.

Walking over to him, she pulled the black remote from its hiding spot and looked at her brother with an expectant expression, "What does it do?"

"Push the button."

Doing as she was told, Bird firmly pressed down on the square center button. Within seconds music started playing, she looked around the room and her face contorted as she realized, "This was the song he was always listening to when he was working-"

"When he was in here with the door locked." Bruce reminded her, as he turned and stared at the fireplace.

Following his line of sight, her own eyes widened as a loud rumbling sound echoed through the room just seconds before the entire fireplace started to slide back into the wall, revealing a stone archway off to the side.

"What the..." She muttered under her breath.

"Told you I found something." Bruce reminded her.

Laying the remote down on the desk, Bird crossed the room and looked through the archway to see an old set of stairs leading down into darkness.

"Where do these lead?" Bird questioned, "Some kind of cave under the house?"

Bruce nodded, "There's a room down there with a computer. Alfred found some weapons..." His voice trailed off when Bird started down the stairs without bothering to listen to his answer for her questions.

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, Bird stepped around a metal door that appeared to have been blown there by some kind of explosion.
Glancing over her shoulder to her younger brother, she asked, "What happened down here? It looks like a bomb went off."

Nodding to the now open doorway into the room, Bruce explained, "The room was sealed."

"So you and Alfred set a bomb off –under the house?"

"It was the only way in." He defended, "I couldn't figure out the code for the keypad."

Stepping over some rubble, Bruce went into the room and flipped the switch on the wall to turn on the few lamps there.

Walking in behind him, Bird's eyes scanned over everything that their father had kept hidden under the manor.

There were old metal and wood file cabinets, a bullet proof vest on a stand with two bullet slugs still lodged in it, there was some medical equipment –including a metal I.V stand and a few bags of clear fluids.

Bird walked over to a small refrigerator with a clear glass door when she spotted bags of what appeared to be blood on the shelves inside.
Opening the glass door, she pulled out a bag of the blood and read the label before guessing, "These are all dad's blood type?"

"Yes." Bruce nodded, his eyes falling to the discolored stains from blood on the cement floor towards the entrance to the room.

Returning the blood bag to its spot and shutting the door back, Bird looked to the large desk where a computer sat with different size monitors.

"What the hell was he doing down here?" Bird demanded to know.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out." Bruce explained. Nodding to where the modem of the computer had been badly broken he said, "This computer has to hold the answers."

"Probably so..." She breathed, "Too bad it looks like someone took a hammer to it."

"Alfred did."

"He what?" Bird nearly stuttered.

"He was trying to protect me." Bruce quietly explained, trying not to hold onto the anger he'd felt when it happened, "He said whatever is on the computer is probably what got our parents killed and he wasn't going to watch me suffer the same fate."

Bird's eyebrows arched at his words. Any other time she'd have probably agreed with what Alfred did to protect her brother –only at the moment she was still upset with their butler for keeping the secret about knowing who her mom was.

Anger seeped into her expression, "I'd probably have fired him."

"Yes, well, that's exactly what happened. Isn't it?" Alfred said, making his presence known to the siblings. Nodding to Bird, he greeted, "Nice of you to drop by, Lady Wayne."

"I was wrong for doing so." Bruce spoke up on his firing of Alfred, "We've moved past it."

"You fired Alfred?" Bird exclaimed, shooting her brother a look and pointing out, "You do realize with him out of the picture –you'd be in my charge, right?"

"I-" He started to say, but she didn't let him speak when she added, "Which can't happen. I cannot have a kid right now."

Immediately offended, Bruce argued, "I'm not a child."

"Yes you are." Bird loudly spoke over him.

"Either way!" Alfred yelled, getting their attention, "It's not happening any time soon; no need for you both to be fighting over it."

"Mr. Fox has been working on repairing the computer." Bruce finally pointed out after several moments of loaded silence passed.

"Can we trust him?" Bird asked.

"Yes." Bruce confidently answered.

"His intentions seem honest." Alfred agreed, looking between them he stated, "I was just about to whip up some lunch. Lady Wayne, will you be staying?"

"No." She quickly answered, before giving it some more thought and realizing she wasn't ready to go home yet. "I was going to go out for lunch." Directing her attention to her brother she asked, "Wanna come?"

"Really?" He asked, with a smile. Being invited to go anywhere with Bird was a rarity.

"Yes, really." She chuckled.

"I'll go and change." He announced, quickly heading for the door of the room to get out of the sweaty clothes he'd been training in.

"Lady Wayne-" Alfred started to say once they were alone, but Bird cut him off, "Has Bruce had anymore contact with Lily?"

"I know you're angry with me." He sighed.

"You didn't answer my question." Bird coldly said without even looking at him.

In the years since she'd moved out of Wayne Manor, he'd somehow forgotten what it was like to be on the receiving end of her bouts of anger.

He could still so clearly remember a time when she was just barely a teenager and he'd went into her room to tidy up since keeping things neat and clean always seemed to be one of the last things on her mind –he thought he'd been careful not to move many of her possessions around took care to only throw out trash and food she had lying around.

Needless to say, when she'd went back into her room and noticed the changes and missing items, she'd spent a week trying to convince her dad to fire him and went for nearly two months without speaking a single word to Alfred again.

"Yes." He finally answered, "He invited her over for dinner earlier this week."

Spinning in place, Bird crossed her arms over her chest and stared him down, "I specifically told you I didn't want Bruce to have contact with her."

"You did." Alfred simply agreed.

"Well?" Bird loudly said, tossing her arms out to either side, waiting for his explanation.

"Well, what?" He feigned innocence; knowing that she was expecting him to explain himself.

"I don't trust her!" Bird yelled at him.

"Master Bruce seems to feel differently on the matter."

"Alfred!" Bird rubbed her forehead, feeling exhausted from the encounter, "I told you not to let him-"

"Right, you did." He interrupted, "But I don't work for you, now do I?"

"Excuse me..." Bird tripped over her own tongue.

"Lady Wayne, you moved out of your family's home the very day you turned eighteen. When your parents died -their wishes were for me to be Master Bruce's guardian." Alfred reminded her.

"Then do your job!" Bird cried out, "Protect him, keep him safe and keep people that we don't know out of the damn house."

"Yell at me all you want." Alfred replied, straightening his posture and crossing his arms behind his back in his usual stance, "But the truth is you're angry with me because I didn't tell you about your mum, which I already explained my reasoning for. If you thought for a second, Lady Wayne, for even a single second that I was incapable of protecting your brother or doubted my intentions to do so –I imagine we'd be having it out in a court room instead of this bloody underground cave!"

Lowering his voice back down to an acceptable speaking volume he added, "So let's not turn this into something it's not, hmm?"

Without another word to him, Bird breezed out of the room and took the stairs nearly two at a time to get out of there.

"Ready?" She called out as she spotted her brother.

"Ready." He repeated back, turning to follow his sister when she walked past him. "Where are we eating?"

"I don't know. Bird shrugged, "What do you want?"

"Pizza." Bruce answered just as they reached the front door.

"Pizza it is." Bird couldn't help but laugh.
Nearly every time she'd taken him out to get something to eat, he always wanted pizza. It might have been one of the only things he had in common with other teenagers his age –they somehow never tired of it.

Bird pulled the driver's side door open to get into her car, but stopped when she saw Bruce starting to get into the backseat.

"What are you doing?" Her eyebrows raised.

When he gave her a confused expression, she asked, "Do I look like Alfred?"

"What?" Bruce questioned, "No..."

"Do I look a chauffeur then?"

"No..."

"Then get into the front seat, Bruce." She said, cocking her head to the side as she watched him.

His confused look faded and he let out a small laugh as he shut the back door to the car, finally understanding what she'd been getting at.

•••

"Alfred told me that you had dinner with Lily earlier this week." Bird struck up a conversation with her brother as they sat in the pizza parlor sharing an order of breadsticks while waiting on their pizza to finish baking.

"I'm not sure what exactly to call her." He admitted, swiping a breadstick through the cup of cheese sauce and then through the one with pizza sauce, "Should I call her my aunt? Aunt Lily?"

"Just because that's technically what she is –doesn't mean you have to call her that if you don't want to." Bird explained, following the same order with the dipping sauces for her breadstick that her brother had.

"That's pretty much what she told me." He explained, "That I could just call her Lily if I'm not comfortable with anything else."

Bird roughly bit the end off of the breadstick she'd swiped through the cheese and pizza sauces.
How dare this woman show up out of the blue and start trying to weasel her way into the family after all this time. Saying all the right things and apparently getting Bruce to start trusting her.

"She told me that you didn't show much interest in getting to know her." Bruce said, "She seemed upset."

"Oh, poor thing." Bird couldn't bite her tongue any longer, "Poor Lily, how awful it must be that the baby she abandoned over twenty years ago doesn't want anything to do with her."

Bruce stopped chewing the bite of food in his mouth at her words. The bitterness and anger in her tone reminded him of when she used to live at home.
After she'd moved out, he wasn't sure what had happened, but the times she'd came around she seemed much more at peace then when she'd been living there.

Having her birthmother come back into the picture was seeming to cause Bird to revert back into the teenager who'd been so filled with hate and resentment that she could suck the life out of the entire manor with a single breath.

"She seems genuine." Bruce commented after he swallowed down the bite of food.

"The timing doesn't seem strange to you?" She raised her brows, "The only people who knew her are gone, Bruce."

"I guess it is a little suspicious." He finally agreed, before asking, "You don't think you'll regret not getting to know her?"

"I don't want to talk about Lily anymore." Bird stubbornly said with a tight smile and Bruce noted was just barely in control of her emotions.

Their pizza had only just been delivered to their table when Bruce pulled a folded up piece of paper from his pocket and admitted, "I found something else in the room downstairs. It was propped up on the keyboard of the computer."

Bird's mind immediately went to the letter she'd received after her parents had been killed and she guessed, "From dad?"

Taking a drink from his glass, Bruce nodded as he stared down to his father's handwriting.

"What does it say?" She asked him with a bite of pizza in her mouth.

"A lot." He answered, "The code to that room was my name."

Bird couldn't help but laugh, "You bombed the door off of a room that your name was the security code too?"

"I thought I'd tried everything!" He defended with a little laugh of his own, "I tried all of our birthdays, and their anniversary. I even tried all of dad's favorite authors and..." He gave a shrug, "I just never thought it would be something so simple."

"May I see it?" Bird asked, holding her hand out.

With a nod, Bruce folded the note back up and placed it in her hand.

"Dear Bruce, these last weeks I begin to feel very mortal, which prompts this note to you. Perhaps I'm being paranoid. I hope so. In any case, if you're reading this, then I'm dead, and you figured out that the entry code is... BRUCE. I'm sorry I had to hide this part of my life from you, because this place only exists because of you and your sister. Becoming a father made me want to be a better man, and I started asking hard questions about the family business.
So here we are. As I write this, you're 12 and a fine, good-hearted boy. So I'm sure you'll be a fine, good-hearted man. But that's all I know. I don't know what happened to me or your mother, I don't know what path your sister has chosen, or how life has turned out for you. I don't even know how old you are. So I'll resist giving you much fatherly advice. Only this: You can't have both happiness and the truth. You have to choose. I beg of you, my son, please choose happiness. Unless... unless you feel a calling. A true calling."

"What do you think it means?" Bruce questioned, as he took a bite from his slice of pizza and watched as his older sister read over the letter his father had left him. He took a drink of his soda and waited for her to answer him.

Folding it up and sliding it back over to him, Bird admitted, "I'm not entirely sure... but judging from that secret room you uncovered and everything in it. I'm beginning to feel like I didn't know him at all."

Grabbing up one of the breadsticks from the basket on the table, Bird's voice lowered when she said, "But the part about having to choose either happiness or the truth. He's right about that, you know. Bruce, we don't have a clue what was really going on and what dad was dealing with. If you keep digging..."

Her voice trailed off and his eyebrows lowered, "Go on."

"You know the story of Pandora's Box, right?"

"I do." Bruce nodded.

Bird cocked her head to the side and let him piece together what she was insinuating on his own.

"You're probably right." He agreed, tucking the letter back into his pocket, "But isn't the truth more important than happiness?"

"I don't know." She shrugged, "I guess it depends on much of masochist one truly is."

His brows furrowed and Bird blew out a sigh, "Of course the truth is important. But once you know something –you can't ever un-know it. If it were my decision, I'd rather you be in the dark and happy instead of learning something that might forever change your world."

"But it isn't your decision." He pointed out, "It's mine."

Bird's vision focused on the large windows at the front of the pizzeria where she saw the same two men she'd noticed had been tailing her since this morning. They were trying to be inconspicuous, but being someone who was naturally paranoid and always keeping an eye on her surroundings, she'd easily picked up on being followed.

Reaching for her drink, she tried to internally calm herself down when her heart started to race. Who were they? Who sent them? Was Bruce in danger?

A tidal wave of a nothing less than a million thoughts and questions flooded her mind.

Ever since she'd been framed for murder, she was quicker to jump to assuming the worst when something felt off to her.

No one seemed concerned with her conspiracy theories. Days ago Harvey had even unplugged the television when he caught her watching a show on conspiracies and the Illuminati.

Since being released from Arkham, there were many nights that she'd lied awake in bed staring at the ceiling.
Kept awake by thoughts and fears that maybe she really was crazy. Maybe she'd been through so much that she'd truly suffered some kind of breakdown.

But this was real. These were the same two men she'd been keeping an eye on all day when they'd show up at the same places she was and she wasn't going to let her brother get hurt if someone was after her.

"Do you have your phone?" Bird asked, as she quickly stood up from the table.

"I left it at home." He admitted.

Her brown eyes locked with his as she lectured, "You should always keep your phone on you."

Before he could say anything, she pulled her own phone from her pocket and handed it to him, "Call Alfred." She instructed, "Tell him he needs to come and pick you up."

Also scrambling to his feet, he asked, "What? What's going on?"

"Nothing." She lied, "Just get a box to take the rest of this pizza home with you and call Alfred, wait for him to come get you."

"Starling!" He called after her as she headed for the door.

"Stay inside!" She ordered.

•••

Bruce stepped outside of the pizzeria, holding the carryout box in one hand and his sister's cellphone in the other.

His heart was beating rapidly inside his chest. Just minutes before, he'd seen Bird get in her car and drive off.

He'd gotten the to-go box like he'd been instructed, but he hadn't called Alfred yet and he also failed to remain inside like he'd been told.

Spotting the front end of Bird's car that was just barely visible from the alley she'd backed into; Bruce tucked the phone inside his pocket and quickly headed for the car.

Just as he rounded the corner of the building, he came to an abrupt stop and the leftover pizza fell from his hands onto the ground –where it landed in a puddle of old rainwater.

There was one man lying on the ground unconscious and he'd arrived just in time to see Bird knock another one out.

"What's..." Bruce stammered, "What's going on?"

"Damn it." She sighed under her breath, before turning to face him, "I told you to stay inside."

"I was worried!" He defended, his eyes falling back to the guys on the ground, "Who are they?"

"I don't know." Bird admitted, "They've been tailing me all day."

"There's rope in the trunk of my car." Bird said before he could ask any more questions, "Maybe a pair or two of handcuffs. Get them."

She tossed her keys to him, but he didn't even make a move to catch them as they landed near his shoes.

"Why do you have rope in your car?" Bruce asked with an ever growing shocked expression on his face.

"For when situations like this arise." She complained, "Hurry up!"

His fingers shook as he leaned down and picked up the keys. He nearly tripped over his own feet trying to run to the back of her car to get the restraints she'd asked for.

This wasn't happening; he thought to himself, this couldn't be happening. They were just supposed to be spending time together and having lunch.

Frantically he looked back over his shoulder to where his older sister was waiting on him, but he just couldn't get his fingers to steady enough to get the key into the slot for the trunk to open.

"We should call Detective Gordon." He yelled to her, "If they really were following-"

"We are not calling Jim." Bird shot the suggestion down, as she knelt down and started to move one of the men's bodies to a position to be easily tied up.

Closing his eyes, Bruce pulled in a deep breath and tried to calm his nerves.

As much as he never imagined the day playing out like this; he was also getting a glimpse of who his sister was –the parts she'd always took care to hide from him.

When he opened his eyes back up, he was finally able to unlock and open the trunk. There was only a slight struggle now as his fingers fumbled to open the black duffle bag he found. As he found a pair of handcuffs and started to pull the rope from the bag, he stopped when he saw a handgun.

"Bruce!" Bird yelled after him.

Seeing another pair of cuffs, he picked them up too and ran over to give her the contents she'd asked for.

Knowing with as fast as she'd been to shoot down the idea of calling Jim, Bruce tried a different approach, "We could call Alfred. He'd know what to do."

"I don't need Alfred." Bird couldn't help but roll her eyes as she spoke, "And I don't need Jim either. I know what I'm doing."

"But-" He started to argue in a fear raised voice.

"They were following me and I'm going to find out why." She hissed.

Swallowing hard he looked around before starting to nearly ramble on, "I read that torture is often ineffective for gathering reliable information..."

Shooting him look and questioned, "Did I say anything about torturing them?

"No, but why else would you want to tie them up and take them with you?" Bruce pointed out, as he reached down and felt his pocket for his sister's phone.

"Look, Bruce. Either you go back inside and call Alfred to come and get you or you help me get these guys into my car. Those are your two options, so pick one." Bird stated, "You should have just stayed inside like I told you to do."

•••

"Hmm..." Bird hummed as she drummed her fingers against the granite countertop and surveyed the knife block.

"A lot of people tend to think the bigger the knife –the scarier." She said out loud, as she started to grab the handle to the biggest knife.

"However..." She breathed, plucking up a smaller one, "I find a smaller blade is much more precise. You know, for more delicate tasks... like removing eyes."

Turning around to face the two men she had tied down to chairs in her kitchen, she smiled widely at their terrified faces. "Now..." She began, closing one of her eyes and acting like she was using the knife as a sight to decide which one to target, "Which one of you would be able to pull off the eyepatch better?"

The man on the left starting squirming frantically around in his seat and trying desperately to talk through the duct tape over his mouth.

"Shh!" Bird hissed at him, eyes narrowed. "My little brother is in the other room."

"Now if you want to talk –nice and civil, I'll take the tape off your mouth. But if you scream or do anything to alarm my brother..." With a creepy giggle she added, "Forget losing an eye; I'll cut your tongue out. Got it?"

He hastily nodded.

Walking over to him she ripped the tape off his mouth and asked, "What are you grumbling about?"

"You got it all wrong." He gasped for air, "We're not here to hurt you."

"Is that so?" She cocked her head to the side, "I guess I was crazy for thinking you'd been following me since this morning then?" Her jaw tensed with the question, "You saying I'm crazy?"

"No!" He stammered, "We have been following you, but not for the reasons you think. We're supposed to keep you safe."

"You're protecting me?" She asked with a disbelieving look on her face.

"Until you knocked us out, yes."

Bird looked over at the other guy who still had tape over his mouth and he nodded in agreement.

She started to ask who sent them, but she thought she heard a car door right outside.

Slapping the tape back over the guy's mouth, she'd just returned the knife to the block when Bruce walked into the kitchen with wide eyes.

"I told you not to come in here!" Bird complained, rubbing her forehead and saying, "And see, not a scratch on either of them. I told you I wasn't going to hurt anyone."

"I..." His voice trailed off.

Hearing the front door open, she asked, "You called someone?"

Without giving him time to answer, she quickly headed into the living room to see Harvey was there. Knowing it wasn't time for him to be off work yet; Bird looked at her brother, "Really? You called Harvey? Damn it, Bruce. I told you I had this under control and I wasn't going to hurt them."

Before Bruce could say anything, Harvey asked, "What the hell is going on? Hurt who?"

Realizing her slip up, Bird let out a laugh, "Nothing. Nevermind. You're home early."

"I was just swinging by to grab some files I left here." He stated, his brown eyes leaving her face and looking to Bruce as he asked, "What's going on?"

"Nothing." Bird lied, holding a hand up to signal for her brother to stay silent.

But Harvey caught Bruce repeatedly glancing towards the kitchen doorway and he started walking that way.

"Your files aren't in the kitchen." She called, chasing to catch up with him, but she wasn't able to get in front of him in time and he saw the two men tied down to their kitchen chairs.

"Oh my god..." Harvey breathed, not even remotely sure how to react to what was in front of him.

"This isn't what it looks like!" She quickly defended, pushing beside him through the doorway to get into the room.

"It looks like you're holding two men hostage in our kitchen, Starling." He stated.

"They were following me." Bird whisper yelled at him.

Not sure if she was telling the truth or was lost in some conspiracy theory fueled delusion, Harvey looked at Bruce and said, "Go back into the living room. It's okay."

"Go on." Bird nodded when her brother looked at her.

Once he was gone, Bird quickly started to explain that she'd seen the same guys following her all day and once she'd spotted them again while having lunch with her brother, she knew she had to do something about it.
But Harvey wasn't interested in her explanation.

Instead, he walked over to the phone on the wall and picked up the receiver.

"What are you doing?" She rushed to his side.

"If you think you're in danger or think someone is following you –you call the police, Starling." He pointed out in the tone of voice that made her feel like she couldn't do anything right.

"No!" She hissed, trying to grab the phone away from him. But being much taller than she was, he held the receiver up out of her reach.

"You bring in the authorities!" He whisper yelled at her, trying to not let Bruce hear their argument.

"Not me." She strained standing on her tip-toes to try and reach the phone, "Not after what I went through. I tried doing things the right way and the system failed me. I'm not going to call in the GCPD every single time I think something is wrong."

"You cannot do this!" He yelled in her face.

Taking a step back she shot him a look as she reached out and unplugged the cord running from the phone jack to the landline extension on the wall –rendering the receiver in his hand useless.

Angrily he slammed the phone down on the counter and opened his mouth, but before he could say anything she shushed him.

"I'm not doing anything that bad, okay?" She said, "Look, these guys are fine. We were just talking." With that she walked over to the guy she'd been communicating with and pulled the tape back off his mouth.

Looking to Harvey she said, "Go ahead, ask him. I just wanted information."

"Lady, you threatened to cut my eyes and tongue out." The man huffed.

"I wasn't really going to." Bird quickly added, "I don't do that stuff anymore."

Slowly walking towards them, Harvey held his arms out to the sides and asked, "Starling? Do you really not see how crazy this all is? At what point did taking people hostage ever cross your mind as being a logical route to take?"

"I'm not crazy." She was quick to defend.

"Yeah, you say that..." Harvey muttered, gesturing to the men tied down, "But this here –this is insane! Not to mention that you've got your brother in the other room-"

His voice trailed off and they exchanged looks when the doorbell chime sounded through the house.

"He must have called Alfred." Bird sighed.

Shaking his head back and forth, Harvey stormed out of the kitchen to see who was at the door.

"Who sent you to follow me?" Bird demanded to know as faced the men in the chairs.

"You just said you weren't actually going to hurt us." He said, seeming far more annoyed than scared now.

He was being paid a hefty sum for keeping an eye on her and keeping her safe, but he certainly wasn't being paid enough for all of this.

"Right." She nodded, "I'm reformed –mostly."
Leaning down she got in his face as she added, "I try not to get my hands dirty these days... but I have a friend who lives for it. You may have heard of him –Victor Zsasz."

She watched with a satisfied smirk as the man's eyes widened.

"Who sent-"

"Penguin!" The man yelled at her, blowing out a heavy sigh, "He hired us."

"Oswald?" Bird's eyebrows lowered, "Why?"

"I don't know, lady!" He huffed, "I guess he's worried about you. Something or someone must have him spooked, why else?"

"Now, you gonna cut us loose or wait until that boyfriend of yours calls the cops?"

Grabbing the biggest knife from the block on the counter she set the men loose.

"Where'd they go?"

Looking up she saw Harvey had returned to the kitchen, only he wasn't alone –Jim Gordon was with him.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, not even realizing she was pointing the knife she'd cut the men free with as she spoke.

"Bruce called me." He admitted, his eyes staying on the weapon just as he'd been trained to do.

Bird closed her eyes and blew out a sigh; her own brother had snitched on her.

"Bird." Jim said, "Put the knife down."

Opening her eyes back up, they darted between the expressions on both Jim and Harvey's faces. Neither of them looked too comfortable standing there and she glanced down at the knife in her hand and questioned, "Really? As if I'd hurt either one of you."

"Well, I didn't think you'd abduct and hold people hostage in our house either –but you got me on that one." Harvey exclaimed.

Angrily dropping the knife to the floor, she muttered under her breath that they were lucky she was a changed person.

"Bruce said that you thought you had people following you." Jim said, glancing back to the chairs, "Where were they? What happened?"

"I let them go, Jim." Bird pointed out the obvious, "Don't you think there'd be some kind of mess if I'd killed them?"

It wasn't until after she'd spoke that she saw Bruce was behind them with a rather startled expression.

"I didn't hurt them." She restated as she locked eyes with her brother, but he didn't hold the stare long before he looked away.

"Just get him out of here." She finally breathed in a defeated tone, unsure herself of how the day had went to hell so fast, as she looked at Jim.

Harvey spoke up, "No, I'll take him. I have to get out of here."
Looking between Bird and Jim he choked down his anger and put a hand on Bruce's shoulder to lead him out of the room, but not before he gave Jim a look to make it clear the he knew about the kiss.

Once they were gone, Bird silently started to push the chairs back up to the table and tried her best to avoid looking at Jim –maybe if she ignored him, he'd just go away.

"What the hell were you thinking?" He finally blurted out.

"Currently, I'm not too happy with my brother." Bird admitted, staring up at the ceiling, "I specifically told him not to call anyone."

"So this is his fault?" Jim pushed.

"I didn't say that." Bird argued, "But come on... you don't snitch on your enemies –let alone family."

"I guess he doesn't follow the criminal code of ethics as religiously as you do."

Turning around, she crossed her arms over her chest, "Don't you have a job or something to do?"

"I was at work. Until Bruce called me." Jim reminded her, his tone softening some, "You scared him today, you realize that?"

When she didn't answer him, he looked back to where the chairs had been sitting and then to Bird as it started to fully dawn on him just why Bruce had been so shaken up, "How did you get two men into your car?"

"Knocked them out and tied them up." She admitted with a shrug.

"And loaded the bodies... all by yourself?"

"Bruce followed me out there, I told him to stay in the pizza parlor and call Alfred to come and get him." Bird said.

"Are you really trying to justify having your brother help you with the stunt you pulled today?" He asked, feeling like he didn't even know the person staring back at him.

He was well aware of Bird's tendency to live outside of the law and take matters into her own hands, her morals were nothing short of questionable on a good day.
But the one thing he'd never expected her to do was drag Bruce into any illicit activities.

She was always at her most human when her brother was involved.

"Go ahead." She helplessly breathed, holding her arms out to the sides defenselessly, "Look at me like I'm crazy... just like everyone else already does."

"I don't think you're crazy." Jim said, stepping forward, "But something is going on that you're not telling me."

Shaking her head, she picked up the knife off the floor and walked over to toss it into the kitchen sink.

"Why won't you talk to me?" He asked, monitoring her closely as she glanced over her shoulder at him.

"There's nothing to tell." Bird dismissed.

"How long have we known each other?" Has asked, folding his arms over his chest and leaning against the counter, "A year? Year and a half?"

"Give or take." She agreed.

"Okay." Jim nodded, "Over that year and half, I'd like to think that I've gotten to know you pretty well-"

"Is there a point to this?" She spun around and looked over to where he was standing, "Or are you just falling in love with the sound of your own voice?"

Jim's eyes narrowed, "I know you, Bird. That's the point. That I know you –only today, this person-" He motioned to her, "I don't know her. The one who scared her brother bad enough that he called me because he didn't know what you were going to do next –I don't recognize that person."

Bird's gaze fell to the floor, not having a verbal argument to what he said. No snappy comeback or smartass remark.

Nothing.

She had nothing.

Not used to her going silent during conversations of this sort, Jim asked, "What?"

"I..." She breathed just loud enough for him to catch.

"You, what?" He pushed.

"I don't either, okay?" Her tone was empty, but didn't come close to touching the vacancy in her eyes when she finally looked up, "I don't recognize that person either."

It didn't seem like such an off the wall step to take in the heat of the moment.
She was being followed, she was well aware of that and at the time it seemed logical to tie up the men who were tailing her –bring them somewhere and get information out of them.

In her world, you didn't call the police when something spooked you.
No. You took care of the problem yourself or you found someone off the books to do it for you.

She was a criminal after all.

Or, at least she used to be. Maybe after months of living within the law and trying to be the person Harvey and her bother wanted and expected her to be should have been enough to change her mindset.

But it wasn't.

It wasn't enough –maybe it never really was.

Closing her eyes she thought back to what Bullock said the day Jerome had killed Essen at the station. The detective had gotten his badge back and returned to the GCPD even though he'd never been happier then when he'd retired from the force.

"We are who we are, right? No use fighting it."

There wasn't much that she and Bullock would agree on, but standing there feeling like her chest was close to concaving and in a state of total disbelief that she'd actually pulled her little brother into something like that... she realized without a doubt that he'd been right.

"Thanks." She tried to smile, "For coming when Bruce called you. I'm really glad he's got you to look out for him. You should probably go by Wayne Manor in the next couple of days just to check on him."

Without saying anything else, she tried to walk away and leave a highly confused and worried Jim Gordon alone in her kitchen; but he stepped in her way and stopped her.

"Bird?"

"You should go." She avoided his eyes as she tried to walk around him.

"Wait." He protested with furrowed brows. Reaching out he had to take hold of her arms to keep her from leaving.

Something was wrong.
The feeling was strong enough that he could feel it in his core, like getting a call in the middle of the night about a crime and showing up the scene without any details; that feeling of dread and anxiousness the entire drive there.

She didn't try to pull away, but she still wouldn't look at him.

"What aren't you telling me?" He asked with any trace of anger long since passed, "What's wrong?"

Bird didn't have the slightest idea where to begin.

Being locked in Arkham and spending countless hours alone with her thoughts had a done a number on her.
She'd never learned how to be her own best friend and when left alone, she couldn't get the noise and voices in her head to quiet.

Her engagement –her relationship was Harvey Dent was over, all that was left for one of them to finally say it out loud.

Her birthmother had showed up out of the blue in designer clothes with tears in her eyes and seeming genuine in her desire to know the woman that her abandoned baby had grown into –and Bird hated her for it.

Then, of course, there was still the fact that someone had framed her for a crime and she'd realized that she wasn't near as untouchable as she'd led herself to believe.
Nor was she near as important to anyone as the people closest to her had led her to rely on.

Her apartment was gone.

Her brother was so scared of her that day that he'd called Detective Gordon for help and their father had some secret cave underneath their family home where he'd been doing god only knows what, while they'd all thought he was in his office doing paperwork.

She was all too self-aware of her growing paranoia and increasing erratic thoughts.
She didn't sleep anymore; she couldn't.

She was suffocating in her own skin. Drowning in her own mind.

Everything.

Everything was wrong.
And so she said nothing –nothing at all.

"Hey..." He whispered; regardless of their being the only ones in the entire three story brownstone, "Whatever it is, you can tell me."

"Everything is fine, Jim." Her chin just barely quivered as she easily spilled the biggest lie on the face of the earth, "I'm fine."

"Yeah?" He questioned, trying to catch her line of sight, "Then why won't you look at me?"

It seemed to take an eternity before she finally moved her gaze up to meet his.

He swallowed hard, "You wanna try that again? Tell me everything is okay?"

"Why?" Bird questioned, "We both know I could look you straight in the eyes and lie right to your face. I've done it before."

Moving her arms, she knocked his hands away and called over her shoulder on her way to the stairs, "You can show yourself out."

•••

"Why are you sitting in the dark?" Harvey questioned as he walked into the kitchen and turned the lights on to find Bird sitting at the kitchen table.

When she didn't answer he shook the bag of food in his hand, "I picked up dinner on the way home." Pausing drop his keys on the closest counter he walked over to the table and sat the bag and drink carrier down with their sodas as he continued, "Spicy chicken sandwiches –the ones you love from that little dinner around the corner from the courthouse."

A smile just barely touched her lips, "I hold two men hostage in our kitchen and pick up some of my favorite food?"

Ignoring the comment, he pulled the cup with her orange soda from the carrier and sat it down in front of her before opening the bag to find their straws.

"Do you hate me?"

"What?" He asked, stopping the fishing expedition for straws he was sure he'd put in that bag.

"Do you hate me?" Bird repeated, "It's a simple question; yes or no?"

"No." He answered without hesitation, "God, no. Why would you ask me that?"

"Because it's important." She calmly answered, "After everything we've been through and as much as I've loved you...I really don't want us to hate each other. I don't want to be those people who can't even pass each other in the local supermarket without our stomachs turning in disgust."

"Starling, it's been a really long day." He said under his breath, as he turned and walked over to open the drawer where extra straws and plastic silverware from takeout always seemed to land.

"It really has been a long day." She laughed, wiping a tear from her cheek, "It's been the longest day and somehow it's not quite long enough."

Walking back over to the table, he sat down across from her and started to unwrap the straws.

"It seemed like it would just drag on forever when I was sitting her alone. I eventually stopped checking the time because the minutes felt more like hours –and then I heard your car pull in and the click from your key when you unlocked the door." Picking up the cup of orange soda he'd just put a straw in for her, she took a slow drink, "I heard your footsteps getting closer and it just felt like someone hit the fast-forward button and everything started moving too fast and I..."

Her voice trailed off and she sat her drink down when her hand started to shake so bad she was afraid she'd drop it.

"Starling..." He sighed, his eyes closing.

He knew exactly where the night –where this conversation was headed and even though he knew it would eventually come to this. He still didn't feel ready to face the inevitable.

"Do you still love me?" She questioned.

"Yes." He answered without a missing a beat, "I always will."

"Me, too." She admitted, choking on air as she tried to pull in a breath and it felt like her throat was swelling shut, "But it's not enough anymore, is it? Not like you promised it would be."

"I said that a long time ago." He defended in a whisper as he looked at her from across the table they'd picked out together, "For the record, I really meant it when I said it."

"I know." She nodded, her head cocked to the side as she asked, "You remember that night?"

"We were outside of the police station." He recalled, "It was freezing outside and raining so hard it was hard to even see."

"And you told me that we could make it through anything, Harvey." She looked up the chandelier of lights fixed within mason jars, a find at a local art show they'd attended months prior, "That it didn't matter how dark the night go, because the sun would always come up and chase the dark away."

"I know." He followed her sight up to the lighting they'd picked out together, "I remember all of it."

"I guess the sun just wasn't strong enough. We can't keep going on like this." Bird was the first to say what they both knew out loud. Clearing her throat she added, "I packed some of my things... enough to get by for now. I already loaded them in my car."

"No." He shook his head, "I'll go. You're the one who wanted this house."

"But that's all it is to me." She argued, "It's just a house... but it's your home. You made friends with the neighbors and you lived here for months alone, but I... I don't think I could, you know? Live here without you."

"I'll get a hotel room for now, until we figure out what to do with this place-" He started to offer.

"I want you keep it." She interrupted, "Selling it would be stupid. We probably wouldn't bank half of what we put in."

"I don't care about the money." Harvey pointed out.

"Neither do I." She cleared her throat again, "So just keep living here for now and we'll eventually figure out what to do."

"Where will you go?" He asked, "A hotel? Wayne Manor?"

"I haven't thought that far ahead." She openly admitted, "I'm just trying to get through this second and then the next and then hopefully the one after that."

On unsteady legs, she scooted her chair back and got to her feet.

Quickly standing along with her, Harvey admitted in a hoarse voice, "I don't want you to go."

"And I don't want to stay until we resent each other, Harvey." Bird replied, a tear teetering on her bottom lash line, "Come on. You're already getting up earlier for work and then staying later and later at the office –just so you won't have to be here with me. I go for walks in the middle of the night because I hate trying to sleep beside you in the same bed when we're worlds apart. How much longer can we go on like this until every single thing about us annoys the other? Until annoyance turns to hate?"

"I don't know what do here, Starling." He admitted, his usually proud shoulders slouched forward in utter defeat, "Am I supposed to fight for you to stay? Wait for you to walk out the door and then chase after you? Or just let you leave?"

She could see the tears in his eyes and the only answer she could give was a weak shrug as she fought to keep the salt water currently burning her own eyes from spilling down her cheeks.

She'd tried to tell him from the beginning that they were doomed.
Maybe it was just easier to chalk it up to something that wasn't ever meant to be.

The end was inevitable.

It seemed an easier pill to swallow if she didn't have to stomach blaming him or choose to let the heaviness rest on her own shoulders.

It wasn't meant to be. Their names were never written together in the stars. Fate just had other plans.

The list of excuses could go on and on forever, but the truth was that she'd went into the relationship keeping a mountain of secrets and he'd chosen to completely ignore her criminal side –even after the truth was out.

And while he'd completely refused to accept her dark side, she'd done the complete opposite and embraced his –in some ways she'd even cultivated it.
Choosing to stay even after he'd shown he had no control over his rage –the point where he couldn't keep his hands off of her.

She'd never loved anyone the way she'd loved him and the same was true for Harvey.

But that love was a rope that turned into a noose at both ends and was slowly strangling them both. A sick game of pressing each other's buttons and pulling the rope so tight the other couldn't breathe.

Their relationship had always been either near perfect or the worst thing for them.
They'd never had an in between; going from one extreme end of the spectrum to the other.

As Bird locked her eyes with his, it was easy to see they were both wondering the same thing.
What would be a greater disservice to the all but volatile relationship they'd grown together; let it quietly turn to dust or wait for the next battle to come along and send them both up in flames.

"Starling." Harvey somehow managed to choke out just as she'd reached the doorway.

"Yeah?" Bird questioned, looking over her shoulder at him.

"Don't let this destroy all the progress you've made." He pleaded, "I know you said that you were leaving your old life behind for a new one with me... but deep down, you have to know that you were doing it for yourself. At least in part. So, please, let this drive you right back into everything you rose above."

Looking away from him, she pulled in a deep breath in an attempt to steady herself. "You don't have to worry." She answered, "I'm a different person now."

•••