Belongs to: @Dawnstar16

Name: Dawnstar

Yay!!! My first leader!

Appearance: Dark brown mackerel tabby with amber eyes. She has a torn ear, a small scar across her muzzle, and a long scar from the front of her left shoulder to the back of her right shoulder. 

Pretty!

 Age: 76 moons (6 years) 

Good age!

 Gender: She-cat

Family: Mother- Honeydew: Light ginger she-cat with bright green eyes. 

 Father- Nightshade: Black tabby tom with dark blue eyes.

 Sister(s)- Snowstorm: White she-cat with light blue eyes.

 Brother(s)- None (I know these don't really fit with Dawnstar's desc. She has grandparents that were brown tabbies.)

That's cool! She takes after her grandparents!

 Rank: Leader

   Clan: FireClan 

 Personality: Dawnstar tends to be reserved and prefers to not talk about her feelings with others. She is naturally aggressive towards strangers and prefers to not trust many warriors. She is often depressed but is occasionally peaceful. Dawnstar is protective, compassionate, and brave but is also stubborn, aggressive, and reserved. 

Not typical leader personality, traits, but interesting. Why is she depressed?

 Backstory: Dawnstar is the leader of Fireclan. She is an extremely talented fighter and fairly good at hunting. In Fireclan, she had a very hard childhood. Her father, Nightshade, was badly injured while fighting off two badgers and her mother, Honeydew, was always worried about him or her sister, Snowstorm. She has never truly felt like she was loved by anyone except her sister as a kit and an apprentice. 

Aww...that's  So sad :'( why did she feel that way?

Because of her feelings, Dawnstar ran away and became a rogue as an apprentice. She later returned and proved to her clanmates that she could survive. She became a warrior and soon deputy after the current deputy died in an attack. In a tragic accident, the current leader lost her final life and Dawnstar took her place. Thornpetal, her best and most trusted friend, was made deputy.After becoming leader, she changed the rule that she-cat leaders couldn't have a mate or kits.

So now leaders are allowed to have a mate band kits?

She became Fiercefang's mate and had three kits, Ambermoon, Fallenpaw, and Mistyrain. During her 'reign', Dawnstar continuously questioned her worth as a clan cat. During this time, Dawnstar joined with Suntail, an evil Dark Forest warrior whose sole ambition was to turn the cats she hated against one another and eventually kill them. Thornpetal eventually turned her away from Suntail and helped destroy the lurking darkness. Unfortunately, not everything went according to plan in the showdown between Dawnstar and Suntail. Ambermoon, who was chosen to fight with Dawnstar, turned on her and attacked her.

Why did Ambermoon decide to turn on her mother?

In the fight, Dawnstar ended up falling off of a cliff and losing a life from internal injuries. Dawnstar awoke to find Thornpetal by her side. Dawnstar recovered quickly and fought with Suntail. When Dawnstar finally beat Suntail, she left her alone to die. Nightshade, Suntail's brother, killed her for the final time once Dawnstar departed. Dawnstar killed Ambermoon in self-defense and returned to her Clan. To this day, Dawnstar's actions still haunt her and she lives with regret.

(Oh my Starclan I wrote too much!)

Don't worry! Long backstories are good!

Mate: FiercefangKits: Ambermoon, Mistyrain, and Fallenpaw

Good news: 

It looks like you've spent a lot of time developing Dawnstar! She is very well developed!! 

Bad:

I would like to know a little bit more about her kithood. Why did she feel like nobody loved her except for her family? Was she bullied as a kit? How did she prove her loyalty and how she could survive to fireclan?  And during the fight with Suntail, why did Ambermoon turn on her mother? I little bit more detail on that too, please.

Overall:

9.5/10 

Dawnstar is a great character! Just a few areas that were slightly confusing, but otherwise great!!!!!