User: -blazingmist-

Name: Fallenface (I understand why you called her this, but for some reason, I feel that it wouldn't be easy for others to understand. When I think of Fallen-, I think of a horrible villain like Brokenstar)- 1 point

Gender: She-cat

Clan: RiverClan

Appearance: She is a dark, ginger tabby with white paws and a white chest. She has yellow eyes. She also has a horribly scarred face, and she is deaf in one ear and blind in one eye. (I feel as though you might have went a little overboard with making this cat scarred. Maybe leave it at her scarred face, rather than making her really bad off.)

Personality: She tries to be kind and happy, but a lot of cats treat her badly because of her appearance. She is bitter and easily angered, but if you are kind to her, she will be very likeable.

Family:

Mother: Maplelily- A long-furred, ginger and white she cat with blue eyes

Father: Cinderash- A light gray tabby tom with yellow eyes. (Although this name is interesting, it doesn't flow very smoothly. I would recommend something along the lines of Ashspots.)- 1 point

Brother: Pebblesplash- A gray tom with darker gray stripes and yellowish green eyes.

Mate/Kits/Crush: None (yet) (I find it interesting how you put 'yet'. If she is in the Place of No Stars, how could she still have kits? I kinda like the idea, though)

Backstory: Fallenface was originally named Emberpaw. She lived a very normal life until she was attacked by a badger. She was renamed Fallenface at her warrior ceremony due to this. Every cat was mistreated her, leading her to be mean and cruel. The only cat that was nice to her was her brother, Pebblesplash. Even her parents rejected her, and after Pebblesplash was murdered, she took revenge by killing her parents. She was always treated horribly, and she became cruel. When she died, she went to the Dark Forest. (I like this story, except I wish you would've explained how Pebblesplash was murdered and who murdered him. Did Fallenface know for sure that one of her parents killed him, or did she just up and decide that she would kill them in her anger?)- 1 point

Points taken: 3 points

Result: 97%

I'll be honest, I like your first story better, but I still feel that you had something going and that people would enjoy reading about your characters. I would like to know more about Pebblesplash, because he seems sweet. Overall, I think you've done a great job creating another warriors-themed story. Keep writing!