Song: Butterflies - MAX & Ali Gatie

Rude

I lost count on how long Adela and I did horseback riding. Inilibot niya ako sa kung saan. Nang dahil doon, mas napansin ko ang naging pagbabago sa probinsya namin.

Mukhang madalas din na ginagawa ni Adela ito kaya sa tuwing may nadadaanan kaming mga tao, palagi siyang binabati ng mga ito.

The province became livelier, progressive even. People are happy with what they do. The neighborhood seems peaceful. A lot has changed.

Nakabalik na kami sa hacienda nang magpakitang gilas si Adela habang nakasakay pa rin sa kabayo niya. I know she wanted me to see whatever she learned but I couldn't help but worry because it's dangerous.

"Hey... Careful!" sabi ko sa kanya nang tumalon ang kabayo niya sa may sanga.

"Did you see that, Ate?" masaya siyang lumingon sa akin.

Tumango ako at tipid na ngumiti. She giggled and went to the stable before me. Hindi pa ako nakakababa ng kabayo ko nang matanaw ko si Catalina na kausap si Primo.

My forehead creased because my sister is on her bikinis while talking to him. Kahit na may pangtaklob naman na suot si Catalina, hindi pa rin ako kampante na walang iniisip na kakaiba 'yang lalaking 'yan.

I may have not seen it but he could be looking at her boobs as they talk. Nagkukunwaring abala sa trabaho pero sigurado akong nakailang sulyap na 'yan.

Kaya naman ay hindi na ako nakapaghintay at dali-dali akong bumaba ng kabayo ko. Mabilis akong naglakad patungo sa kanila.

"Catalina, what are you doing here?"

Kahit na si Catalina lang naman ang pakay ko, sabay silang napabaling sa akin. Napaayos pa ng tayo si Primo nang mapansin na ako iyong lumapit. Bahagya siyang yumuko.

"Ay! Good afternoon, Ma'am. Tapos na po kayo? Balik ko na po ang kabayo—"

"No need." I cut him off. "I already asked someone to do it."

Hindi niya inasahan ang pagputol ko sa sinabi niya. Napanguso siya at tumango. Hinarap kong muli ang kapatid at saka sinuyod ang suot niya.

Napahawak ako sa sentido. She could've changed first! Ano bang pinag-uusapan nila at mas inuna niya pa 'yon kaysa ang magpalit?

"What are you doing? Bakit hindi ka pa nagpapalit?"

"I just finished swimming. Why? Where have you been?" Humalukipkip siya at tinaasan niya ako ng kilay.

"I went horsing with Adela," I answered her question. "Can you change now?"

Napatingin tuloy siya sa suot niya. Based on her look, she doesn't look bothered by it. She chuckled and looked at me again.

"What's wrong?" she tilted her head.

I look at her unbelievably. I know she's such a carefree person but please...not to this extent. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Hinarap ko si Primo.

"Can you leave us for a minute?"

Umangat ang kilay niya, mukhang nagulat sa utos ko. "Sige po, Madam!"

Dali-dali niyang kinuha ang gamit niya para mabilis na makaalis sa harap namin. Pinanood ko lang siya habang ginagawa iyon.

Nang matapos, magalang siyang yumuko at nagpaalam. I saw Catalina waved at him from the corner of my eye.

"Uh...bye! Thanks!" pala-kaibigan niyang sinabi.

"Anytime, Madam."

Ngumiti ito sa kapatid ko at kumaway pabalik. Nagkatinginan kami. Kumunot ang noo ko at pairap na iniwas ang tingin sa kanya. Hinintay ko siyang makaalis bago ko hinarap si Catalina.

"What are you doing? You could've at least changed before talking to him!" suway ko.

"Well, my question can't wait any longer that's why I asked him right away. Habang nandiyan siya."

"Ano ba ang itatanong mo sa kanya?"

"About the plants he's taking care of. What is it to you anyway? Bawal din ba akong kumausap ng workers dito?"

"I didn't mean it that way, Cat. You were wearing a bikini while talking to him. You don't know how his mind works!"

"What? Do you think he's going to sexualize me in his sleep? No!" she laughed like she found my accusation funny. "He didn't even look at my chest while we were talking! He's good at making eye contact by the way. He seems nice."

Bumuka ang bibig ko at saka hinilot ang sentido. Kahit anong pagpapangaral sa kanya wala talagang epekto. I let out a deep sigh.

"Just..." I started. "Just be careful around boys, Cat."

She smirked. "Well, between us I know more about boys, Ate. So you don't need to worry."

Hindi na ako umimik at tiningnan lang siya. I know she can handle herself. Maybe it's the "ate" instinct that kicked in when I saw her talking to him. I don't know. I don't trust anyone around that man.

Or maybe... I'm judging him way too much. I just find him too persistent and talkative for a worker. I have never encountered such ever since that's why it's a surprise for me.

Umiling si Catalina sa akin bago ako nilagpasan at pumasok ng hacienda. Mamaya maya pa ay napabaling ang tingin ko kay Primo na may panibago namang trabaho na sinisimulan ngayon.

Nakita ko siyang sumulyap sa gawi ko ngunit nang makitang nakatingin ako ay agad siyang nag-iwas ng tingin at inabala nalang ang sarili sa ginagawa.

Pumasok na lang din ako sa loob ng hacienda. I need to clear my mind. It's ridiculous how this man can immediately get a reaction from me. Dulot siguro iyon ng una naming pagkikita.

I guess the first impression lasts huh?

I busied myself by reading and catching up with Jana, my only friend in college. She's currently on a vacation in Madrid. I'm glad she's enjoying it.

Nawala lang ang tingin ko sa telepono ko nang madinig ko ang katok mula sa labas ng pinto ko. Sumungaw roon si Manang. Ngumiti siya sa akin.

"Mag-dinner na, hija."

Tumango ako at bumangon agad mula sa kama. Binuka niya ang pinto nang mas malaki para sa akin.

"Favorite n'yo ang ulam ngayon!" excited niyang sinabi. I smiled.

Manang has been with us ever since we were little. Hindi pa nag-aasawa si Papa, siya na ang nag-aalaga rito. Maaasahan siya sa lahat ng bagay kaya siguro hindi na rin siya pinakawalan ni Papa. We grew close to her as we grow up, especially Catalina.

I am so used to her presence that's why I feel light-hearted around her. Unlike with that man...who's suddenly everywhere.

"Uh... Manang," I called her attention. Lumingon siya sa akin. "About Primo."

Umangat ang kilay niya, halatang 'di inasahan iyon.

"Anong meron, hija?" she snaked her arm around me, looking so intrigued with my question.

"Saan n'yo ho siya napulot?"

Sa halip na sagutin ang tanong ko ay natawa siya. Kumunot ang noo ko at nagugulohan siyang tiningnan.

"Napulot? Hindi siya napulot, hija. Nag-apply siya rito."

Applied? Kung ganoon, lahat ng trabaho in-apply-an niya? I saw him doing all the jobs I can name in our hacienda. Gaya ng sabi ni Manang kanina, all around siya.

"Naawa kasi ang Papa mo kaya kahit hindi naman kailangan ng trabahador, kinuha na niya."

Mas lalong kumunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niyang iyon. I suddenly got curious.

"Kung hindi mo alam, galing sa mayamang pamilya 'yang si Primo. Old money. Kaso bali-balita na kaya sila nagkanda utang ay dahil biglang na-bankrupt ang kompanya nila. Binenta lahat ng ari-arian para makabayad hanggang sa hindi kinaya ng ama kaya ayun...nag-suicide."

My mouth parted in surprise. I did not expect that. For someone who's always bright like him, I didn't know he was carrying this kind of problem.

"At ngayon, may sakit pa ang nanay niya kaya siya nagdodoble kayod para may pang-ospital at pambili ng gamot. Nag-iisang anak pa naman din. Nakakaawa ang bata."

I looked down at my feet. Now I suddenly feel bad for being a bit rude to him. He was probably just trying to please me because he doesn't want to lose his job. Kaya pala ganoon na lang siya kung humingi ng tawad sa akin.

I remember how scared he was when he accidentally put dirt on me. Now I understand why.

"Bakit, Theia? May ginawa ba sa 'yo?"

"Uh... nothing, Manang. I'm just curious."

Tumango siya. "Mabait 'yung batang 'yon, Theia, at napaka sipag! Ni minsan hindi ko narinig magreklamo kahit ang daming pinapagawa at may kailangan sa kanya. Kung hindi lang siguro nag-aaral pa, baka mag full-time 'yan dito pagkatapos ng bakasyon."

It's good to know that he's still studying though. At least he didn't put his dream on the line for the sake of his problems. It must be a challenge for him to make a living for himself and his mother.

This is why I never take what we have for granted. Everything I want, I work hard for it. I don't want my family's name or money to get me where I am. We are lucky and privileged enough to have more than what we need. Unlike people like Primo who have to work double time in order to continue to live.

Hindi nawala sa isip ko ang kuwento ni Manang hanggang sa pagtulog. After I washed up, I looked outside and saw him still working. Gabing-gabi na pero narito pa rin siya at nagtatrabaho.

No wonder why he's working hard like this. He need money for himself and his mother. I feel terrible for him. Masyado ba akong naging rude sa kanya?

Anyway, why am I even overthinking this? Mas kailangan kong isipin ang mga kailangan kong gawin habang nandito ako. I'm only have a month before I go back to Manila. I need to maximize my time here. That's where I need to put my focus on.

It's been a week since we came back. My days always been between productive and lazy. I spend most of my time in my room or in Papa's office. Every single day, I learn something new about our company.

I didn't realize how big and successful it was until I was being trained by Papa. Ngayon mas na-pressure akong ipagpatuloy ang magandang legacy ng kompanya. I can't afford it to crumble down when I take over. Mas kailangan ko pang galingan.

I plan on going to the farm again today to check. Ang sabi ni Papa, para mas maintindihan ko ang trabaho, kailangan kong ilagay ang sarili ko roon. That is why I wore a more appropriate outfit for the farm.

I check myself out in the mirror for the last time before I head out of my room. I wore a black racerback and an olive-green denim jumpsuit. I put my hair up in a high ponytail so it won't be a hindrance to whatever I'm about to do today.

I informed a worker that I'm going to the farm and asked them to get the golf car ready. I waited on the porch until the golf car arrived with Primo driving it. Nabigla ako na siya ang magmamaneho sa akin pero hindi ko na lang pinahalata.

"Good morning, Madam!" bati niya at pinunasan ang upuan sa likod niya. "Tara na po."

For a week, I didn't see him around. Or maybe because I wasn't focusing too much on him compared to my second day here. I was busy and I'm sure he is, too. Ngayon ko na lang ulit siya nakita at mukhang sa farm din siya pupunta.

Lumakad ako palapit at umupo sa likuran niya. Hindi ako umimik habang pasakay ako kahit na ramdam kong pinapanood niya ako. When I'm already seated comfortably, I motioned him to go in which he answered with a nod.

"Uh... kung okay lang po sa 'yo, ako raw po ang magturo sa inyo ng dapat na gawin. Utos lang po ni Kuya Rowell." Aniya matapos ang ilang sandali.

Hindi ko binaling ang tingin sa kanya dahil likod lang naman ng kanyang ulo ang makikita ko.

"I don't mind." Simple kong sagot.

Naramdaman ko siyang tumango. "Harvest season po ngayon kaya madami-dami pong maaani. Medyo magiging madumi lang po dahil umulan kagabi kaya maputik. Ah...eto po pala ang bota."

Kinuha niya ang botang tinutukoy niya at iniabot ito sa akin. I reached for it and placed it beside me.

"Thanks."

Inabala ko ang sarili sa pagsuot ng bota habang nagpapatuloy siya sa pagdaldal. Ganoon siguro talaga siya. Hindi nauubusan ang bibig ng kuwento.

"Tuwing harvest season po pala hinahayaan kami ni Don Victor na kumuha ng mga ani para pagsaluhan pagkatapos o 'di kaya iuwi po sa bahay. Galante ho masyado ang Papa n'yo kaya ho siguro sobrang successful din ng business n'yo."

Nang dahil sa sinabi niyang iyon ay biglang sumagi sa isip ko iyong naging kuwento ni Manang tungkol sa kanya. They also used to have a business before but it got bankrupt, the reason why he's living so differently now.

I also remember how I felt bad after I realize how rude I was to him. He was just being nice—probably to save himself and his job. But there I was...judging him too much.

"Kung gusto n'yo po sumali mamaya, okay lang po. Pero okay lang din po kung hindi. Ihatid na lang po kita agad."

And look at him inviting me to their little gathering after work. I'm not used to being around guys so him being so nice to me is making me feel a bit weird.

Guys in my college are either assholes or so full of themselves. That's why I'm being labeled as a man-hater because I never take any of their shits. Wala akong panahon para sa kanila.

That's also the reason why I can't blame myself for being rude to him. After that first encounter and him being so persistent and everywhere, I can't even blame myself. Minarka ko na sa isip ko na pare-parehas lang silang mga lalaki. But still...I felt bad after hearing a glimpse of his life story.

"Was I being too rude for you at some point?" I couldn't help but ask.

Halatang hindi niya inasahan ang tanong ko kaya bahagya siyang napalingon sa akin habang nagmamaneho. I waited for him to answer.

"Uhm...hindi naman po." He chuckled. "Inasahan ko na rin po kasi dahil hindi naging maganda ang unang pagkikita natin."

I nod my head. "You can stop saying 'po' though. Mukhang hindi naman nalalayo ang edad natin. It's weird hearing it from you."

"Okay po." I glared at the back of his head.

"Ay! Sorry! Okay...okay pala." Pagbawi niya sabay humalakhak. Napailing na lang ako.

I looked outside again. Mukha namang hindi uuluan ngayon. I don't want my first experience at the farm to be a disaster. I want to learn a lot of things today.

Bigla namang nawala ang tingin ko sa langit nang magsalita muli si Primo. Ibinaling ko ang atensyon sa kanya.

"At saka, iniisip ko nalang din na tipid ka magsalita. I don't find you rude, Madam."

I nod my head. That's good to know.

"But if ever I was, I'm sorry." Sabi ko. "Especially during the time when I saw you and Catalina talking. Just know that I'm really protective of my siblings. I hope you understand where I'm coming from."

Tumango siya, mukhang nakuha ang ibig kong sabihin.

"Okay lang naman akong masungitan basta ikaw, Madam." Pabiro niyang sinabi.

"What?"

"Wala! Joke lang po. I mean... joke lang! Baka sungitan mo na talaga ako kasi okay lang sa akin."

My forehead creased in confusion. Primo's so random and kind of ridiculous, too. I scoff. The side of my lips rose as I try to fight off the smile that was threatening to come out. I shake my head and just waited for us to arrive at the farm.