A/N Hello! It's been awhile! (Sorry!)
Incase you weren't aware - I was in Sydney to see my best friend :) While I was there we were lucky enough to see Green Day and All Time Low/Neck Deep/The Maine! (They were incredible!)
Also it was my birthday Saturday (27th) and I turned 20, which is terrifying tbh hahaha.

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PLEASE VOTE
*UNEDITED*

*****

i didn't leave because
i stopped loving you
i left because the longer
i stayed the less
i loved myself

- Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey

*****

Brinley felt sick.

Her day had started with the announcement that Pike had been elected Chancellor and while this revelation had angered Brinley, some small part of her had hoped that perhaps Pike would step up to the job in a way that would help rather than hinder.

Brinley should have known better than to be so optimistic.

She had felt her Father's eyes on her all morning, watching with a careful and calculating gaze as though waiting for her to fly off the handle about something. Brinley had tried her best to ignore it, but it proved to be difficult. It wasn't until some time later that she realised her Father hadn't told her the whole truth about what had happened in the holding cell that morning.

The gates opened and immediately all eyes were drawn to the area as the newly elected Chancellor appeared. Brinley felt immediate panic consume her as Bellamy came into view, his clothing stained with still wet blood, however the panic began to subside and give way to utter dread as she realised there wasn't something entirely right, that these people didn't look injured at all.

If anything, they looked accomplished.

Brinley watched Octavia run towards Bellamy, concern in her expression that almost immediately disappeared as Bellamy brushed her off coldly. Brinley quickly moved towards Lincoln and Octavia, a terrible thought forming in the back of her mind as Pike began speaking to the watching crowd.

'Everybody listen up!' Pike boomed. 'Twenty-four hours ago, you elected me your Chancellor, every action I've taken since, and every action I will take will be to achieve one sacred goal. The creation of a self sustaining, prosperous and safe Arkadia.'

There were yells of agreement.

'This morning, on a muddy field, our people paid tribute to those who have been taken from us by sending a message to the grounders! This land is ours now!'

'Oh my god.' Brinley got out shakily, seeing her horror reflected in Lincoln and Octavia's expressions. This was exactly what Brinley had been afraid of the moment Bellamy had suggested the idea of Pike as Chancellor.

War.

'Resist, and you will be met by force!' Pike continued. 'Fight, and you will be greeted by death! Today is a new beginning, mark it down, and remember it just like the grounders will remember it!'

Brinley felt eyes on her as Pike's speech came to an end, and swallowing harshly she looked up, meeting a familiar set of eyes that once held so much warmth, but now only held ice.

Brinley stared right back at Bellamy, feeling a vicious surge of satisfaction when he was the first to look away as he submissively followed after Pike's retreating figure.

*****

Brinley and Octavia had seen much violence and bloodshed in their short lives. From the moment they'd set foot on the ground their lives had become battle after battle, with new enemies and obstacles surfacing whenever they finally thought they'd won. Both girls had accepted this way of life, accepting that for the most part, the only option was to kill, or be killed. Because of this, gruesome and bloody battlefields no longer shocked the girls like they once did.

Brinley would never forget the ashen look on Octavia's face when she'd laid eyes on Atom's body, or the shakiness of her hands when her and Jasper had stumbled upon Wells' fingers, hacked off crudely with a makeshift knife, even the utter disgust when Brinley admitted she'd been the one to end Atom's life was fresh in her mind. There was something so beautiful and utterly human about the raw emotion that had once decorated Octavia's face at every moment. In those first few weeks on the ground, Octavia had been an open book.

Similarly, Octavia remembered Brinley's heartbreaking reaction when Wells had been killed, and the desperation and dread that had practically radiated out of her entire body when Murphy had been hung, and shortly after, banished. Brinley Kane had never been the most expressive person, and she'd seen and suffered much more than the average person did in their entire lifetime.

It was sad, really, how much both girls had changed, had hardened in order to adapt to the harsh reality that was life on the ground.

But even despite the horrors both girls had experienced, nothing could have prepared them for the sight they were about to stumble upon.

Bodies. Gnarled, twisted, broken bodies lay as far as the eye could see, each one seemingly suffering more damage than the next. Blood painted the grass in a picture of suffering, hordes of flies buzzing as they settled on the lifeless bodies of those who had been sent only to protect.

Brinley was momentarily unable to tear her eyes from one form, smaller than those around him, a bullet hole lodged neatly into his forehead.

The boy's eyes were still open, frozen in a look of terror as he seemingly realised what was coming a moment too late. For a second, Brinley wondered what the last thing he'd seen was, had it been Hannah? Pike? Bellamy?

The boy couldn't have been older than fourteen.

Brinley's stomach churned dangerously as she crouched down, the smell of decay and death hitting her nostrils as she reached a shaking hand out, sliding the boys eyes shut gently.

'Yu gonplei ste odon.' She whispered as Octavia called her name quietly, her face void of all colour.

Octavia's eyes glistened as she pushed back the material of the only tent in the vicinity, Brinley following quietly.

'Octavia? Brinley?' Clarke sounded surprised. 'Where's Kane?'

'He sent us.' Octavia explained, making her way to Indra, whose sweat covered skin was an indication that she'd been injured, badly. 'Indra, thank god.'

'How did this happen?' Lexa spoke harshly, and for once Brinley couldn't blame her.

'Kane lost the election to Pike.' Octavia admitted. 'Everything's... different.'

'Your people voted for this!' Lexa looked murderous.

'No. No I don't believe that-' Clarke tried.

'What would you know Clarke? You haven't been here.' Octavia shot back quickly.

'Not everyone voted for this.' Brinley cut in. 'Pike only won the election by a few votes. Not everyone supports him.'

'Listen to me, the grounder army is going to be here in less than a day.' Clarke explained. 'I need to see Bellamy.'

Octavia and Brinley exchanged a look; Brinley cleared her throat before she spoke to Clarke. 'Bellamy was a part of this. He's with Pike.'

'What makes you think he'll help us?' Octavia questioned.

'He saved Indra's life.' Clarke answered simply before she turned to Lexa. 'If what they're saying is true, then Pike trusts him. If I can get to him, then he can get to Pike.'

'You can't just walk through the gates Clarke! You've been living with their enemy. If it were me, I'd kill you on the spot.' Lexa reminded Clarke harshly.

Octavia hesitated before she spoke. 'We can get her in.'

Brinley looked to Clarke and then Lexa as she slowly nodded her head. 'We can do it.'

*****

It was quickly decided that Brinley would leave first.

The head start would give Brinley time to scope out the camp and warn Octavia if it wasn't safe for her to smuggle Clarke in. The trip to the slaughter field hadn't taken all that long on foot, but on horseback it was even quicker. Lexa had offered one of her horses, and Brinley had eventually agreed, needing all the extra time she could to find out where the guards were, and the quickest way to get Clarke inside safely.

Brinley left the horse hidden in the tree's surrounding the camp; Clarke would need her to get back to Lexa if things didn't go the way that they hoped.

And really, when did things ever go their way?

Brinley snuck back inside easily, a familiar voice drifting towards her almost immediately. Lincoln was angry, and Jackson was evidently trying to calm him down.

'What's going on?'

If Brinley's appearance had startled the two, they didn't let on.

'Pike's moving the grounders out of medical-' Jackson tried to explain but the distraction was all Lincoln needed to storm off angrily in the direction of the medical bay, leaving Jackson to hurry after him.

Brinley caught up to Lincoln quickly, silently cheering him on as he yelled at one of the guards to move out of his way.

Everyone turned towards them as they entered, Jackson looking apologetic and Lincoln looking murderous. Brinley kept her expression guarded, waiting to see how the confrontation would play out.

'Lincoln, you don't want to be here right now.' Bellamy had his arms crossed, once again wearing his guards uniform, standing with his arms crossed right beside Pike.

'We asked them to come here.' Lincoln's voice was barely controlled as he spoke.

'We can't spare the supplies.' Pike sounded uncaring.

One of the grounder women was struggling to sit up as a guard tried to force her to stand. 'Danae –' Lincoln reached for her.

'Lincoln, no-' Abby warned as guards immediately moved forwards, hands on their weapons. The girl – Danae – was unable to stand on her own, her breathing laboured with effort.

'She is too sick to move.' Lincoln growled out at the man in front of him.

'Looks like she's moving just fine to me.' The man smirked cockily.

'Gilmer, back off.' Bellamy intervened for the first time. 'Jackson, why did you bring him here?'

Danae's body gave out and Brinley knew what was coming. 'Lincoln don't-'

It was too late. Gilmer and Lincoln were fighting, Lincoln obviously winning. If there was one thing Brinley could take from the situation it was the without guns, most of Pike's people would be useless.

'Lincoln!' Bellamy tried to pull Lincoln off of Gilmer but Lincoln hit Bellamy to the ground. Brinley's gaze drifted to Pike and her eyes widened, Abby apparently the only other person seeing what she was.

'Lincoln, Lincoln-' Abby tried to get Lincoln's attention.

Lincoln was advancing on Bellamy and Brinley quickly manoeuvred herself so she was in between the two males. 'Lincoln, stop! Stop!'

Lincoln's gaze faltered. 'You're protecting him now?' Lincoln's eyes narrowed at her, disgust colouring his tone.

Brinley narrowed her own eyes at the accusation. 'No.' She denied. 'I'm protecting her.'

Lincoln followed Brinley's gaze, his eyes finally landing on Danae who had collapsed on the floor, Pike casually holding his gun to her head.

'He goes with them. Take him.'

Brinley stepped forward but Lincoln shook his head at her, an apologetic look on his face. Brinley smiled sadly, nodding her head once.

'Sorry we had to do this the hard way.' Pike apologised to Abby who had disgust and distrust all over her face. Abby stormed out of the room, unable to deal with Pike at that moment.

'Is that blood?'

Brinley, who had started to follow after Abby, stopped at Pike's question, noticing for the first time the crimson staining her hands from where she'd closed the eyes of a child caught up in a massacre.

Brinley shrugged lightly as she turned back around to face both Pike and Bellamy. 'Probably.'

'Where were you?' Pike's voice held no curiosity, only suspicion.

Brinley shrugged again. 'Went on a hike, stumbled across a field used for slaughter.' Her voice was hard, her eyes focused on Bellamy.

Unbeknownst to Brinley, her confession caused Bellamy's heart to sink, though on the outside, he appeared to be unaffected. Bellamy knew they'd gone too far, he'd told Pike as much and while he, for the most part, agreed with Pike's reasoning behind their actions, he hadn't realised how much he wanted to keep the gruesome truth about the massacre hidden until he saw the disappointment in Brinley's eyes.

Pike sighed, drawing the attention of both Bellamy and Brinley. 'We did what was necessary-'

'Necessary? Those people were there to help us!'

'I know you see it that way now Brinley, you're young and naïve-'

'Naïve?' Brinley scoffed. 'You don't know a damn thing about me!'

'I know you're intelligent' Pike countered. 'You're fearless, ruthless, confident. You have all the qualities of a soldier, Brinley. We can help each other.' Pike paused for a moment. 'You could join us.'

Brinley schooled her expression into an emotionless mask. 'No thanks.'

Pike sighed again. 'That's a shame, it really is. We could learn a lot from each other. I tell you what, if you ever change your mind, let me know.' Pike's tone ended the conversation as he glanced at Bellamy, nodding once.

Bellamy moved towards Brinley. 'You need to leave, go back to your quarters.' Bellamy's hand barely touched Brinley's shoulder before she jerked away from him.

'Do not touch me again.' Brinley ground out through her teeth, aware of Pike's eyes on them.

'Move, Kane-'

'So what, you're taking orders now? What happened to our oh- so - fearless leader huh?

Bellamy's eyes narrowed, and his voice was low when he spoke. 'You should have agreed to the Chancellor's offer. Things are different around here now. You can't just do whatever you want without consequences.'

'Oh I should agree, should I?' Brinley's voice lowered, unsure of the direction the conversation had taken.

'You should.' Bellamy agreed easily. 'Because no one else is going to be tolerant enough to accommodate such a selfish little girl.'

Brinley's blood boiled and her voice shook with rage. 'Fuck you Blake.'

Bellamy shrugged as he backed away, towards a curious looking Pike. 'You made the decision to run away from everything Brinley. I chose to stay – I'm choosing to survive.'

*****

Twenty minutes later, Brinley's hands were still shaking.

Clarke and Octavia should have been in the Ark by now, and for all Brinley knew – they already were. The small room with the hidden exit was left alone and none of the new guard patrols got too close. For once, something had gone their way.

'Hey.' Octavia suddenly appeared beside Brinley, looking relieved at having found her.

'Everything go okay?'

'Yeah. Bellamy's with Clarke now.'

'Good. Hopefully she can get through that thick skull of his.' Brinley's voice was full of bitterness and she knew it.

'What happened?' Octavia asked warily.

Brinley sighed, running a hand through her hair absentmindedly. 'I don't know if this is going to work, O. Bellamy believes he's doing the right thing in helping Pike. If this goes bad, we have to get Clarke out of here.'

'Don't talk like that. We have to atleast try.' Octavia sounded desperate. 'My brothers in there somewhere – I know he is.'

Brinley squeezed Octavia's arm gently. 'I hope you're right.'

*****

'Go easy on Octavia. I had to beg her to get me into camp.'

Bellamy stared impassively at Clarke, though he was surprised by her sudden reappearance. 'What are you doing here Clarke?'

'We need to talk-'

'Oh, you've decided that, the mighty Wanheda, who chose the grounders over her own people, who turned her back on us when we came to rescue you, now you want to talk?' Bellamy was still simmering with anger from his earlier conversation with Brinley, and Clarke's arrival wasn't helping.

Clarke walked determinedly towards Bellamy, head held high. 'I came here to tell you that the Ice Nation has paid a price. Justice has been served for the attack on Mount Weather. I came here to tell you, it's over.'

'There it is again.' Bellamy's arms were crossed. 'Why do you get to decide it's over?'

'We did our part.' Clarke answered simply, hoping it would be enough.

It wasn't. 'We?'

'Lexa and I.' Clarke explained. 'The Ice Queen is dead, the problem was solved and then you let Pike ruin everything!' Clarke was becoming increasingly exasperated at Bellamy's obvious attitude.

Bellamy walked towards Clarke this time, his expression closed off. 'Why are you here, Clarke?' He repeated slowly.

'Arkadia needs to make things right, or Lexa and the twelve clans will wipe us out.'

'Let her try.' Bellamy was uncaring.

Clarke began to panic, both Brinley and Octavia's warnings beginning to make sense. 'Please tell me that going to war is not what you want.'

Bellamy was silent for a moment. 'We've been at war since we landed, atleast Pike understands that.'

'Pike is the problem!' Clarke was angry now. 'This isn't who you are!'

'You're wrong.' Bellamy shook his head. 'This is who I've always been, and I let you and Octavia and Kane and Brinley convince me that we could trust these people, when they have shown over and over who they are, and I won't let anyone else die for that mistake!'

'Bellamy... I need you.' Clarke tried desperately. 'And we don't have much time.'

'You need me?' Bellamy asked emotionlessly.

'Yes, I do.' Clarke admitted. 'I need the guy who wouldn't let me pull that lever in Mount Weather by myself, the guy who came down here so his sister wouldn't be alone,' Clarke was pleading and she knew it. 'I need the guy who had a blood transfusion to save Brinley's life-'

'Enough Clarke.' Bellamy's tone indicated the Clarke had gone too far. 'You are not in charge here, and that's a good thing, because people die when you're in charge. You were willing to let a bomb drop on my sister, then you made a deal with Lexa who left us in Mount Weather to die, and forced us to kill everyone who helped us! People who trusted me!' Bellamy's voice was filled with emotion now and his eyes were shiny with unshed tears.

'I...' Clarke was choked up too.

Bellamy shook his head and turned around to face the door as Clarke slowly lowered herself onto a seat.

'I'm sorry.' Clarke's voice was more composed now, though still sad. 'I'm sorry for leaving, but I knew I could, because they had you.'

Bellamy made his way back towards Clarke, gripping her hands in his own as he crouched down in front of her.

Clarke smiled hopefully. 'I know we can fix this.'

'I'm sorry too.' Bellamy breathed as he handcuffed Clarke to the table before she even realised what was happening.

'Hey-' Clarke tugged at the handcuffs. 'No. Don't. No! Bellamy, don't! God...'

Bellamy didn't turn back as the door shut behind him.

*****

Octavia and Brinley couldn't do much but wait.

'Did you hear Jaha's back?' Octavia asked, breaking the silence that had settled.

'What?' Brinley gasped. The last time she'd seen Jaha, her best friend had been following him into the unknown, and no one had heard from them since.

'Apparently he found what he was looking for.' Octavia scoffed. 'Sounds like crazy talk to me.'

'Octavia, were there – were there others with him?'

Octavia looked confused at the question before realisation crossed her features. 'Oh, oh crap Brin, I completely forgot, I-'

'O.'

Octavia eventually shook her head. 'No one else from Arkadia was with him.'

Brinley's heart sank. 'John...'

'Brinley Kane.'

'Speak of the devil.' Octavia muttered as the two turned around, coming face to face with Thelonious Jaha.

'Jaha.' Brinley acknowledged, trying to ignore the pain in her chest and the lump in her throat.

'You look well.' Jaha smiled.

'Thanks?' Brinley wasn't sure how to respond to the odd behaviour of her former Chancellor.

'You were talking about John Murphy, correct?' Jaha's eyes seemed to drift off to somewhere behind Brinley for a moment before they refocused on her.

'Yes.' Brinley cleared her throat. 'What happened to him?'

'Oh, he was perfectly fine the last time I saw him.' Jaha admitted cheerfully. 'I wouldn't worry about him too much, he's a survivor, much like yourself.'

'He's – he's alive?'

'As far as I'm aware, yes.' Jaha confirmed. 'We found the City of Light Brinley, perhaps when you aren't busy, we can talk.' Jaha smiled pleasantly.

Something about the smile unsettled Brinley, though she wasn't sure why. 'Yeah, maybe.'

The smile stayed on Jaha's face as he disappeared back down another corridor. Octavia glanced at Brinley, who was unable to hide the relieved smile on her face.

'Murphy's alive, thank god.'

Octavia couldn't help the small smile that lit her own face. 'Atleast that's one win for today so far.'

Brinley nodded. 'That's one.'

A few halls away, Jaha walked steadily towards the outdoor area of the ark, hearing a comforting click-click-click in his head all the while.

The woman in red walked gracefully beside Jaha, though to anyone else it would have looked as though he were walking alone. Her painted red lips opened as a detached sounding voice began speaking. 'That girl, she's strong. We need her.'

'Brinley? I agree.' Jaha smiled easily. 'Soon she will join us in the City of Light, and then the others will follow.'

*****

'Pike should be in his quarters.'

'Bellamy, you don't have to do this-'

Octavia and Brinley exchanged a panicked glance as they heard Clarke and Bellamy's voices coming towards them. From those two sentences alone it was clear their plan hadn't worked – Bellamy was turning Clarke in.

'Yes, I do.'

'Just let me go!' Clarke pleaded.

'Believe it or not, I am doing this for your own good!'

Brinley looked at Octavia, the two nodding at each other as they made their moves.

'Believe it or not-' Octavia drew their attention long enough for Brinley to quickly and efficiently knock the second guard out. 'I'm doing this for yours.'

'You can't just hit a guard!' Bellamy yelled angrily.

'Just did,' Brinley shot back.

'Let her go.' Octavia added.

'I can't do that.' Bellamy denied as the sound of talking drifted towards them.

'They're coming.' Octavia breathed.

'You should go.' Bellamy urged Octavia who looked conflicted.

Brinley however didn't hesitate to steal the shock baton from the unconscious guards belt, hitting Bellamy in the side, sending him gasping to the floor.

Clarke was immediately fumbling with the handcuff keys.

'Clarke hurry up!' Octavia panicked.

'Let's go.'

'Follow me.' Octavia ran ahead of the other two girls, hoping they hadn't been seen.

Brinley's heart was pounding as Clarke and Abby reunited. She half listened to the conversation, her ears mostly on the sound of footsteps progressively getting louder.

'Security breach, lock down the exits.'

'You three need to go now!' Marcus ushered the three girls towards the secret exit. Octavia immediately worried about Lincoln, but Brinley was having an internal battle with herself.

'Brin – come on!' Octavia tried to hurry her.

Brinley shook her head. 'No, no I need to stay here.'

'What?' Octavia gasped. 'No, no way-'

'Brinley-' Marcus tried.

'I'm more use on the inside, and besides Pike's already watching me, if I disappear it's going to look bad for all of us. Now go, stay safe!'

There was no more time to complain as Abby and Marcus slid the panel shut.

'Did anyone see you with Clarke?' Marcus immediately questioned his daughter.

'I took down one guard, I hit him from behind so I don't think he saw me.'

'Good, that's good.' Marcus nodded in relief. 'Anyone else?'

Brinley hesitated slightly.

'Brinley?' Abby asked in concern.

'Bellamy.' Brinley admitted. 'I shock lashed him so Clarke could get away.'

'Do you think he'll turn you in to Pike?' Marcus worried.

Brinley pursed her lips, the thought having already crossed her mind. Would he turn her in? Would he turn Octavia in? 'I don't know.' She eventually answered, hating the worried looks on Abby and Marcus' faces.

Brinley was lying to them because truthfully, she did know. After seeing firsthand the carnage Bellamy had helped unleash on their allies, on their friends, Brinley was almost positive that Bellamy would turn her in as punishment for her shock lash attack, that he would turn her in to teach her a lesson about consequences or he'd turn her in simply because he could.

In a world full of so much uncertainty, there was atleast one thing that was clear –

- Bellamy Blake was capable of anything.