Chinese History time!!:

During the Western Zhou (or the spring and autumn and the warring states) the emperor of Zhou made a stupid move (exactly what I can't remember) and so China fell into war and chaos with everyone fighting for control over China. That time was when the great philosopher, Confucius lived as well.  

 Dear Journal, (Diary)

As I predicted, civil war broke out because our boss made a fool of himself. Now all those states are all fighting over control of me and Yao. But before that I should probably say how Yao and I broke out of that accursed prison. Well, his fever was getting worse and worse and I literally knew zero, I mean zero kung fu so I had to heal him. The only option I had was to let him drink some of my blood... Gross. Since a fever is the consequence of an imbalance in the two, he have to balance it out which would be hard because a fever means you have too much Yang and he is the carnation of Yang... So he'll need some of my help and the way to do it is to let him drink some of my blood. He's still in the washroom washing his mouth with soap right now... Anyways after that his fever actually died down but I was growing weaker because of blood loss... I know it's stupid that I didn't find a bandage before cutting my wrist (Why that place out of all places??!!-me) but hey, I was in a hurry! I fainted after seeing him wake up, the last thing I saw, or felt was his tears... Well, anyways miraculously he managed to get us out of there. Our boss told me that Yao was barely standing when he staggered out with me in his arms. Like I'll believe that old man! He just likes Yao better and wants to put me down for slowing Yao down in his escape. Everyone likes Yao better... Why wouldn't they? Yao is sweet, well mannered, strong and a great representative of the nation, while I am spiteful, bad mouthed and only good at what girls are good at. I'm sometimes really jealous of Yao. Shit, this is carved on bamboos... I can't erase that can I...Fuck my life. (Zao! Please keep swearing to a minimum! This is your diary!!-me) I'm going to throw this down the cliff tomorrow. This fucking diary that Nu Wa ma forced me to write, it's going down the cliff tomorrow I swear with my sexuality...