A/N: This story will take place in a Modern AU. WARNING: This story is about depression, self harm and suicidal thoughts. If any of these topics make you feel uncomfortable or trigger you, please do not read this. Other than that, enjoy little wolves.

One.

That's all it takes is for one razor to change your life for the worse.

I looked down at my arms, decorated with fresh new ones on top of the old faded ones. I watched the blood trickled down and dripped into the once clear bath water that is now a crimson red, along with the small sharp object I held in my hand. Normally, I'd feel a burning sensation when the water touches the open wounds but now, all I feel is the tingly sensation it gives me. I sighed and leaned my head back against the wall trying to focus on the silence around me but all I could hear was the voices in my head congratulating me for listening to them once again. I felt the tears running down my cheeks and into the bloody water as I pulled my knees into my chest, wishing they'd just stop and go away, leaving me alone. All of a sudden, I hear a certain sound that came from my phone, signaling a text I received. I got up to get out of the tub before unclogging the drain and grabbing a towel to dry my body to see who disturbed me during one of my darkest moments.

Hey, Cat! Bow, Glimmer and I are going to grab a bite to eat and then go bowling. Come with us, it'll be a lot of fun! - Adora♡

Adora. My best friend since childhood. My best friend that I'm madly in love with. The blonde haired beauty that had the most gorgeous eyes that could make anyone's heart skip a beat. Everyone loves her and looks up to her. I mean, who wouldn't? She's smart, beautiful, kind, selfless and so much more. She is the perfect girl anybody could ask for. Her name LITERALLY means a gift and adored. Me? I'm just a depressed feline girl and we all know nobody falls for the sad girls, no matter how hard we try. My heart beats fast and my cheeks burn as I start typing a reply saying that I'll go but then the voices come back to haunt me.

'Why are you even thinking about going, Catra? You'll only be a drag to them and you know it.'

'Adora is only asking out of pity because she feels bad for you. She doesn't want you to really go.'

'Stay here with us, where you belong you sad excuse of a person.'

I bit my lip as I knew they were right. I'd only be a drag to everyone and will make everyone feel a certain type of way. My chest begins to feel heavy as I'm typing word for word, giving her some lame excuse saying I couldn't go.

Sorry Dore, I'm feeling a little bit nauseous today and I'm just gonna stay home. Maybe next time, okay? - Catra

I hit sent and put my phone down on the counter, sighing as I feel my heart aching as every minute passes. I looked up to see my reflection and I see my grayish-brown hair tied in a high ponytail to prevent it from getting wet, my ears flattened, my eyes red and face puffy from all the crying I've done along with my arms from my recent activity I almost do every chance I get and my tail that's swaying back and forth. Opening the bathroom door and grabbing my phone, I made my way to my bedroom and changed into some black tights, a gray tank top with a black hoodie over it and black converse. After I finished getting dressed, I went towards the front door to go out and get something to eat since I didn't feel like cooking but then I realized I didn't have the energy to go out either. So, I plopped down on my couch and stared at my ceiling, thinking about what I should get to eat.

'Screw it, I'll just order it online so they can deliver it to me. I really wanted to go for a walk too.. What a waste of a good, comfy outfit.'

'So what? You wanna go out and show your grotesque features you call a face to society? HA! You're better off hiding yourself from the world, you imbecile!'

*DING DONG*

My ears twitched as I heard the doorbell ring. Confused, I walked towards the door to see who was there through the peep hole and when I saw who it was, my heart immediately dropped and I felt like I couldn't breathe anymore.

Adora was at my front door. The love of my life was at the front of my door, just standing there waiting for me to open the door. I can't even pretend I'm not home cause of that text I sent her earlier. I clenched my fists, my claws digging into the palm of my hand that I know is gonna leave some scars as well. Wasn't she supposed to be with Arrow and Sparkles? Why isn't she with them?! Why is she here?!

"Catra! It's me, Adora! You told me you were feeling nauseous and I wanted to come by and check up on you! I brought you some medicine, your favorite candy and movies I thought we could watch together! Open up, It's cold out here!" I let out a breath as I unlocked the door and opened it for her. She greets me with a smile before pulling me into a tight hug and I enjoyed it, even if the cuts were stinging from the embrace she had me in, I didn't care. Her presence almost made me forget that I was a walking catastrophe or felt like I was a complete mess. Almost.

"What are you doing here, Adora? I thought that you were supposed to hang out with Arrow and Sparkles today?" She broke the hug, much to my dismay, and gave me a heartfelt smile. She was wearing a white kit beanie, a white knitted sweater, light blue jeans and white adidas. Her dark blonde hair, that normally tied into a high ponytail, was let down and I've never seen anything more beautiful in my life. I noticed that she had a bag full of stuff, indicating that she went to the store just to hang out with me.

"Well, I wanted to check up on you to see if you were okay. You've been pretty distant from everyone and haven't been hanging out with us like you used to. It kinda felt like you were avoiding us. We're all worried about you... I'm worried about you.." I blushed and was about to smile until the voices started speaking again.

'L I E S'

'She's lying to you. Nobody is worried. She's just saying that to you but she doesn't mean it'

'Who would care for someone like you? You're a waste of space, Catra. Nobody wants you in this world, not even your parents wanted you.'

'Please... Stop it... I'm begging you..' I start to plead with the voices, knowing if they continue, my urge to paint on my body with my sharp paint brush is becoming stronger and I don't want Adora to be here when I do it. In the end, the voices had won yet another battle and as much as I want Adora here by my side, I have to think of a way to get her to leave.

"Oh... Well... I'm sorry I worried you guys but I'm really okay. I'm just feeling a little under the weather. So, you have nothing to worry about. Just go back to everyone while I try and get better." I gave her a tooth grin smile to show her she had nothing to worry about, hoping that could get her to leave.

"That's okay. I told Bow and Glimmer I was gonna be taking care of you so they could head on without me. I'll take good care of you today." I bit my lip trying to think of another reason to get her to leave me alone.

"You know, I probably have a bug that might be contagious and you could probably get it too. I would hate for my best friend to get sick." 'That should get her to leave.'

"I have a pretty strong immune system, so I should be pretty good." 'God damnit, Adora! Stop being so damn stubborn and leave already!'

"Catra... Are you trying to get rid of me?" She had a pained expression on her face and I felt my heart ache and my stomach twist. I never wanted to see that look on her face, especially since I'm the one who caused it. I don't want her to leave.. I want her to stay while she holds me in her arms as she tells me everything will be okay and that she loves me.. but that's only a fantasy. This is reality and the reality is that she would never go for someone like me. With a shaky breath, I stared into her ocean eyes and told her,"Yeah. I just want to be left alone. If you could just leave, that'd be great."

I turned around to leave and go to my room to leave her but then I felt a hand grip my arm. I didn't realize I hissed in pain and retracted my arm away from Adora until I seen a look of shock on her face. My eyes widened at the realization that I had blown my cover.

'You idiot! Now she's bound to know what you've been doing behind closed doors!'

'Now she'll think of you as a freak! As soon as she sees those scars, she'll leave you and tell everyone how pathetic you are!'

'She'll never love you.'

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I didn't know she gently grabbed my arm and lifted my sleeve, revealing the truth I've tried to keep hidden for so long. A gasp is what broke me out of my thoughts and I looked up to see Adora staring at my left arm and I seen tears start to form in her eyes and I decided to look down, not wanting to see her cry, knowing it'd make me cry.

"Catra... what have you done... why'd you do this to yourself?!" I kept looking down at the ground, not because I wanted to hide the fact that there were tears already beginning to form in my heterochromia, but because Adora's voice had cracked and was shaking when she asked me the question I never wanted anyone asking me. I looked up into her light blue eyes filled with tears that were pouring out of her eyes, her lips trembling as she softly wept. Feeling my own tears fall, I gave her a broken smile and said,

"Simple; I'm a walking disaster.. a disaster that's trying to end it's disruption to society. A mess that needs to be thrown out."

The tears started to fall even more and I felt every emotion I kept bottled up, come out and started to speak what has been going on inside the dark place that's called my mind, "I hear these voices in my head that's telling me to cut or to just kill myself and I listen to them.. I feel so numb inside and I feel like I'm drowning in the ocean and sinking to the bottom of the surface while everyone is up at the surface breathing and living their life to the fullest.. I feel like I'm a bother to everyone I meet and they'd be better off if I was dead... I feel like I'd be better off dead.. I wouldn't drag everyone down, including you.. I always feel like I'm dragging you down.. Adora, YOU ARE GORGEOUS!! You can have anybody you want and they'd be lucky to have you cause you're such a catch. I'm just some damage goods that doesn't even deserve to be called your best friend. Trust me, if I wasn't around, you'd have a great li-"

"SHUT UP!!" I was shocked that she yelled at me and stopped talking. "YOU ARE NEVER A BOTHER TO ME!! YOU WILL NEVER BE A BOTHER TO ME!! MY LIFE ISN'T WORTH LIVING IF YOU'RE NOT BY MY SIDE, IDIOT...!! What good is living my life.. if my best friend isn't there to live it with me.. I care about you so much... I told you we were going to be together until we're old and have gray hair... you're stuck with me.. I love you to the moon and back.." Sobbing, She let go of my arm and grabbed my hand, leaning her forehead against mine.

"I love you too.. I'm sorry.." I closed my eyes enjoying this moment. Even if she didn't mean it the way I wanted her to, it still felt nice to hear it.

"I don't think you understand... I love you and I want you to be the person I want to by my side.. forever and always Catra.." All of a sudden, I felt her lips against mine and I kissed back. I started crying, tears of joy. My fantasy became reality and I cupped both her cheeks and tasted the salt of both our tears on our lips but I couldn't really care. The voices in my head suddenly stopped bashing me and let me have this moment and I'm grateful. We broke the kiss and hugged each other tight as if the other was going to disappear.

"How many scars do you have on your body..?" I buried my head into her shoulder, nervous about answering her question. I don't want her to think I'm a freak if I tell her but she's my best friend, now girlfriend, so I might as well be truthful.

I sighed, "Too many to count.. You might as well consider me a canvas at this point..."

She broke the hug but took my hand, leading me to the bathroom, "Well, let's patch you up and put some cocoa butter or Aloe Vera on those fresh ones so they don't hurt as much. Remember, we still have a full day of eating junk food and watching movie together and I'm gonna give my girlfriend the best day ever." Even when her eyes are red and her face is puffy, she still looks beautiful. I felt my face heat when she called me her girlfriend and smiled.

"Next time, you have thoughts like this or you're feeling sad, please tell me. I'll come whenever you need me because I love you with every fiber of my being." I felt her squeeze my hand lightly.

"I love you too, Adora. I love you as much as I love making messes." I kissed her cheek and I seen pink dusting her face making her pout which made me chuckle a bit.

One.

That's all it takes is for one person to change your life for the better.

The End

A/N: Hope you guys liked this story, it's been soo long since I've made a story but I've kinda been going through some rough shit in my life I never thought I would go through. I'm okay and I'm gonna finish the MARICHAT one shot book.

Later, my wolves. ~ Little Red ★