Her

"Inaantok ako." It was a common sentence people around me hear.

"Sige, umupo ka muna sa upuan at matulog." Lay sighed, I nodded and sat on the bench.

Today was supposed to be our girl date but I couldn't help the drowsiness. Lay understood my disability more than anyone. She was my childhood friend, therefore, she knew how excessive I sleep during the day. It was not something I wanted to, although I desire sleeping, there are times just like this where I wouldn't want a sleep attack to happen.

Kaagad akong humiga sa bench na nakita namin sa parke. Lay gave me the neck pillow she always carry around her. I smiled at her and yawned. I'll just take a quick nap and then I'll spend the rest of my day with her.

When I was a child and Pa noticed my excessive sleeping behavior, he immediately went to the doctor for consultation. That's when I was diagnosed with narcolepsy. I have an abnormal sleep cycle and my brain was unable to regulate sleep wake cycles. I used to like it when I was a kid because that means I'd be homeschooled and I'd stay on my bed whole day. Until I grew older and realized how much I was missing out while I was asleep.

My dream was vivid. I saw the pictures in clear display but when I woke up, I forgot what my dream was all about. I yawned and roamed my eyes around the park but Lay was not there. Mukhang mahaba ata ang oras na nakatulog ako. Unti-unti akong bumangon at isinuyod ang mata sa kabuuan ng parke. Casa Cantatio's park was unheard of. Wala masyadong taong namamasyal dito lalo na't may mas magandang tanawin pa ang maari nilang puntahan. The park was simple, wide green grass, benches, metal statues of different mythologies of this city and a kid's playground.

It was simple yet peaceful. Hindi matao kaya isa ito sa gusto kong puntahan. Kung tutuusin ay malaki ang Casa Cantatio dahil sa laki ng sakop nitong lupain. May kani-kaniyang lupa ang mga tao rito kaya may kani-kaniya silang tanawin.

"Lay?" Tawag ko sa kawalan pero hindi siya sumagot.

I sighed. May pagkakataon kasing nakakatulog ako ng ilang oras kaya siguro inakala ni Lay na matagal ako magigising. I slowly stood and approached where I saw people were crowding.

And then I saw people around a tall man. He was laughing with them and interacting. A lot of girls were swooning over him and he never hesitate to show them his smile. He was carrying a sack of rice on his shoulder. He just stood in between the crowd as if the weight of the rice didn't bother him much when in fact, it looked so heavy.

"Sige po, ha. Basta sabi niyo mag-oorder kayo ng bigas kaya bibisitahin ko talaga kayo!" Aniya sa isang babae. She must've offered him something

He was wearing a white muscle tee shirt that a lot of girls are drooling from the view of his tanned biceps. He's a tanned man with golden bronze skin, messy hair, brown eyes, and a charming smile. But something caught my attention, it was the attractive hole on the right side of his cheek as he talk and smile.

Nagtama ang mata namin sa gitna ng pakikipag-usap niya kaya unti-unting napawi ang ngiti sa labi niya. I sighed when his dimple disappeared.

"Miss Briana... anong ginagawa mo rito?" Taka niyang tanong kaya bumaling sa akin ang atensyon ng mga babaeng kumakausap sa kaniya.

Oh... he knew me. I remember seeing him for the first time when I was a child. Hindi ko lang maalala kung ano iyon pero kilala ko siya bilang anak ng mayordoma namin. He was living with his grandma sa isang bahay kubo malapit sa sakahan namin. Madalas ko rin siyang nakikitang nag-aani sa sakahan, I didn't think he would pay me any attention.

"Ah... pupunta ka ba sa mansyon?" Malapit lang naman kasi ang tinitirhan niya sa mansyon kaya kung uuwi siya, pwede naman akong makisabay.

"Ah... oo. Sasabay ka ba?"

Some girls looked at me as if I killed their joy. Others sighed in disappointed while some looked at me with malice and doubt.

"Oo, sana." Tango ko at binalingan ang mga nanonood sa akin. I gave them a polite and apologetic smile.

"Hindi ba't kasama mo iyong kaibigan mo?" Taka niyang tanong sabay sulyap sa likod ko.

"Tatawagan ko nalang..." Sabi ko at nag-iwas ng tingin.

Okay, I'm not gonna lie. I'm his... fan.

Bukod sa guwapo siya, masipag, at mabait, ang biloy sa pisngi niya talaga ang nagustuhan ko. Ever since I  started knowing what fan is from what Lay always told me, I started seeing him as one of my idol. She said that you're considered a fan if you admire a person from afar.

And I always do. Sometimes... I dream of him and his dimpled smile.

Kaya palagi akong dumadaan sa sakahan para masilayan siya at ang ngiti niya. I would always make sure to be discreet. Kaya hindi ko inaasahang kilala niya pala ako.

This is my chance to get to know him more. I'll just call Lay and tell her what I did.

Tumango ang lalake at binalingan ang mga nanonood. He gave them their charming and they all sighed in unison. I almost did, but I controlled it.

"Aalis na muna ako." Paalam niya sa kanila kaya bumuntong-hininga ang iba.

"Kj." I heard others murmuring.

Again, I gave them all an apologetic smile before following him. May dala siyang truck na sasakyan, nilapag niya sa likod ang sako ng bigas at sinarado ang trunk. He glanced my way but he didn't acknowledge me. Naglakad siya papasok sa sasakyan at pumasok sa driver's seat kaya naiwan ako sa labas, gulat at hindi nakagalaw.

I mean... shouldn't it be a common knowledge to open the door for me?

"Pasok." Aniya, wala naman kasing bintana ang truck niya kaya naririnig ko siya at malaya niyang nakikita ang ekspresyon ko. That means it has no aircon.

I was about to open the car door when a small hands appeared and open it in behalf of me. Bumaba ang mata ko sa bata na may lollipop sa labi, he was looking at me with a grim face. I smiled at him. How cute! Masungit nga lang ang mukha katulad ng lalakeng nasa driver's seat.

"Hi, baby boy!"

Hindi siya sumagot at naglakad na sa backseat. He opened the door and went in without a glance. Sumulyap ako kay Felix na nakakunot ang noo sa akin. I gulped and smiled at him but he avoided his eyes so I silently went inside his car and settled myself. I caught a glimpse of the cute boy and decided that he's less intimidating than the man.

"Hi! What's your name, little boy?"

"Jay... ten years old. Not his brother but his friend's little brother." He narrated as if he expected every question I will ask him kaya inunahan niya na ako, sabik na mapatahimik ako.

I pouted and was about to ask just anything, but then Felix started the engine without warning that I yelp in shock.

Ang bilis niyang magpatakbo!

He was gripping the steering wheel with both his hands, his veins were popping, his jaw was ticking. Why does he looked so mad?

The wind from the open window was harsh, although it was refreshing but the particles of dust are attacking my eyes. My hair was untamed and it kept on blocking my face that I had to scoop it with one hand. Tahimik lang siyang nagmamaneho. I figure out I should start a conversation with him.

"Uhm... kilala mo pala ako?" Tanong ko sa kalagitnaan para naman hindi masayang iyong pagsama ko sa kaniya rito.

Tanging tango ang sagot niya, hindi ako magawang balingan! Bakit parang ang sungit niya sa akin?

"Anong name mo?" Even though I know his name. Our mayordoma, his mother, told me his name was Felip. Simply because I was curious.

Mas lalong lumala ang paggalaw sa panga niya. I tilted my head and stared at his form. His dimple was hidden and I'm a bit disappointed by it. Kaya ako sumama para masilayan ang biloy niya! Tapos ipagkakait niya lang sa akin...

"Uhm... my name is Auro—"

"Alam ko, miss Briana." He politely cut me off.

Why does he like to emphasize my last name?

"You can call me—"

"Hindi pwede, miss Briana. Sakop niyo kami kaya dapat may respeto kami sa inyo."

I sighed. "I wouldn't mind if you call me—"

"Hindi na, miss Briana." He's stone cold! Ang sungit naman nito! Ano bang ginawa kong kasalanan?

"Sorry..." I bowed my head and sighed.

Nakita ko sa gilid ng mata ko ang pagkagulat niya. Binalingan niya ako na nalilito.

"Bakit?"

"Dinistorbo ko kayo ng mga kasama mo... 'di ba? Kaya ka galit?" I bit my lower lip and stared at my hands on my lap.

He sighed. "Ayos lang, miss Briana."

"Sorry..."

"Ayos lang."

"So—"

"Ayos nga lang."

Napatikhim ako. "So—"

"Miss Briana." Seryoso niyang tawag.

I sighed and shook my head. I should stop, I don't even know why I can't stop myself.

"I'm sorry." Napapikit ako nang mapagtanto ang pagkakamali. "Sorry..." Napailing ako sa sarili.

He sighed but he didn't talk. Tahimik siya habang nagmamaneho, nakatuon sa labas ang atensyon ko. I'm thinking of things that could start a conversation but since I was homeschooled... I don't really know how to socialize with other people except for Lay.

"Uhm... anong pangalan mo?"

His grip on the steering wheel tightened. Akala ko hindi niya na ako sasagutin pero biglang bumukas ang labi niya.

"Felix."

I paused. Felix? Why is he lying? His real name is Felip!

"Ahh... 'di ba anak ka ni Manang Cecilia?" I tried to confirm.

"Oo." Malamig niyang sabi.

May nagawa ba akong kasalanan?

"Uhm... may joke ako." I said to lighten up his mood. He could bless me with his dimple if ever he laugh at my joke, which I'm sure he will!

Kumunot ang noo niya pero nanatali ang atensyon sa daanan. I bit my lower lip, waiting for his approval.

In the end he sighed. "Ano?"

"Bubuyog ka ba?"

Hindi siya nagsalita kaya bumagsak ang balikat ko.

"Bakit?" Tanong niya matapos ng ilang minuto.

"Kasi... I want to bee with you!" Nakangiti kong sabi. Lay showed me that line from her phone and I collapsed on the floor from laughing when I read that. I'm sure he will laugh too!

But he didn't laugh. Nanatiling nakakunot ang noo niya, he glanced my way and pursed his lips. Jay from behind snort, my cheeks blush in embarrassment. Hindi sila natawa roon?

"Akala ko joke?" Aniya matapos ng ilang minutong katahimikan.

"Joke 'yon..." I gulped.

"Hindi 'yon joke, pick-up line 'yon."

"Ahh..." Nag-iwas ako ng tingin dahil sa kahihiyan. "Sorry."

Napailing siya pero hindi na nagsalita. Paano ko ba makikita iyong ngiti niya? Bakit kapag iba ang kausap niya parang ang dali niyang ngumiti?

Syempre... hindi pa kayo close, Rori!

A bulb popped over my head as an idea formed! That's right! Kakaibigananin ko siya nang sa gayon maging close na kami! Kapag nangyari 'yon, malaki ang tsansa na masilayan ko ang biloy niya!

Kaya hindi ko nalang pinansin ang pagsusungit niya sa akin nang makababa ako sa truck niya. I tried to smile and say thank you but he sped up his car until it vanished on the dirt road. I sighed and shrugged it off.

"What... ibig mong sabihin sinungitan ka ni Felip? Sigurado ka ba na siya iyong tinutukoy mo?" Hinampas ako ni Lay at tumawa na para bang nababaliw ako.

"Oo! Sinungitan niya ako!" I pouted. Gaya ng inaasahan ko, nadatnan ko si Lay sa kusina namin na kumakain. Nagulat siya nang makita ako at humingi ng tawad, aniya ginugutom daw kasi siya kaya pansamantala siyang bumalik. Wala naman iyon sa akin dahil may gusto akong ikwento sa kaniya tapos ganito lang ang reaksyon niya! Sige! Magagalit na talaga ako sa kaniya!

"Baka kakambal niya 'yon! Hindi masungit si Felip! Mabait iyon 'tsaka palangiti!" Patuloy niyang tawa.

There is an instance but I was sure he's the same man I've been idolizing— as Lay like to call it. Hindi ko nga lang alam kung bakit Felix ang ibinigay niyang pangalan sa akin at hindi ang totoo nitong pangalan.

"Hindi! Sinungitan niya talaga ako! 'Yung nakita niya 'ko nawala ngiti niya sa akin!" Giit ko.

"To see is to believe! Hindi ako naniniwala!" Halakhak niya kaya napabusangot ako.

Baka naman bad mood lang siya 'di ba? Malay mo bukas, hindi ka niya masusungitan, Rori!

I was wrong.

"Ah! Felix!" Tawag ko nang bigla niya akong lagpasan. Nakita niya ako pero inignora niya ako!

Tumigil siya sa paglalakad at nakakunot ang noo akong nilingon. Here we go again with that frown on his face! May ginawa ba akong mali?

"Hi..." I say with a smile.

Tanging tango ang sagot niya bago siya tumalikod ulit, buhat-buhat ang sako ng bigas. Mabilis ko siyang hinabol kahit na maputik ang daan. My white sandals are ruined by the mud and there's a big chance it might ruin my white sundress but I proceeded to chase after him, holding the hem of the dress up to my waist.

"Saan ka pupunta? Samahan na kita!" Nakangiti kong sabi habang hinahabol siya.

"Hindi na, miss Briana."

"Rori! You can call me Rori!" I said with a friendly smile despite struggling from walking in the muddy ground.

"Ayos lang, miss Briana"

"Stop with that formality!" I forced a laugh. "Just call me Rori!" I insisted.

Umiling siya pero hindi na nagsalita. Natigil lamang ako nang huminto kami sa harap ng truck niya. He opened the trunk and put the sack of rice inside it. Namamangha ko siyang pinagmasdan nang bigla niya akong harapin.

"Umalis ka na." Malamig niyang sabi.

"Pwedeng sumama?"

"Hindi." Walang pag-aalinlangan niyang sabi.

Napanguso ako. "Bakit?"

"Hindi pwede, miss Briana. Aalis na ako."

"Wala naman akong gagawin—"

Pumasok siya sa loob ng truck kaya dali-dali kong binuksan ang passenger's seat at pumasok. I assembled the seat belt and turned to him with a smile.

"Anong ginagawa mo?" He glared at me and gripped the steering wheel tighter.

"Why... why do you hate me?" I bit my lower lip. I won't let him go knowing I might have done something wrong! As much as possible, I want to fix it at instant!

"Hindi ako galit sa 'yo, miss Briana." Walang ekspresyon ang mukha niya pero randam ko ang diin ng bawat salitang binitiwan niya.

"Yes you do! Bakit ang sungit mo sa akin?"

Nag-iwas siya ng tingin. "Bawal na bang maging masungit?"

"I mean! Ang bait mo sa lahat and yet when it comes to me... you're that!" I point the frown on his face.

He scoffed and shook his head. "Kailangan mong tanggapin na hindi lahat ng tao ay gusto ka."