Jungkook's stomach shifted uneasily as he shuffled to the hotel lobby. As always, it was a busy day which fueled his anxiousness more. Big crowds of people had always made him feel unsettled, he had always felt calmer behind a desk and a computer screen. And right now, he felt like an animal outside of their natural habitat.

The IT room was his safe space where he felt like himself the most, where he felt the most useful. He wasn't strong, nor agile - at least he didn't think he was. He was what Namjoon called the security team's secret weapon, with his sharp wit and vast knowledge in the IT area, but Jungkook definitely didn't feel like someone special. He just felt like he was an ordinary computer guy who had the luck to find a job that made him feel worthy.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he let his eyes scan the lobby, searching for a certain someone. Regret tortured his mind. He wasn't supposed to snap at her like that back then. He had never raised his voice with her, never allowed himself to be rude. He valued her and cared deeply for her, even though he wasn't sure she reciprocated.

Jungkook cherished the stolen glances and secret rendez-vous they would have every single day, the way she'd lose herself in his embrace. She never spoke about her feelings but the way she'd go back to him time and time again ignited a spark of hopefulness in him. It went on for a year now. Perhaps she did feel the same, but there was something always standing between them and Jungkook knew perfectly well what it was. Or better yet, who that was.

Her idiot boyfriend.

He didn't deserve her. He couldn't give her what Jungkook could and judging by the words that had slipped her on a couple of occasions, he couldn't touch her like Jungkook did. He couldn't make love to her the same way.

An ounce of smugness crawled its way up to Jungkook's chest, but quickly evaporated. She would never leave the bastard and Jungkook never dared to ask that of her. He was afraid it would freak her out and she'd break the whole thing off. He would have to settle for the hushed conversations, the half-spoken words, the secrecy.

It was better than nothing.

Jungkook pushed his glasses up on his nose. He could feel his pulse pounding in his temples. An anxious sigh escaped him upon laying his eyes on her, sitting on one of the sofas in the lobby.

As he walked up to her, he took in her shiny blond curls, pulled back into a loose ponytail. Her emerald green eyes were pinned at the magazine in her lap as she skimmed through the pages mindlessly.

Timidly, Jungkook approached her until he was standing right in front of her.

"Hey, um," he let out awkwardly in a quiet, almost inaudible voice. "About earlier. I'm sorry for talking to you like that. I shouldn't have."

Meisa just knit her eyebrows together slightly, her fingers playing with the page.

"I got agitated, that's all. I couldn't believe my eyes how thick that smoke was. You saw it, right? I guess the tension got the better of me and I snapped." Jungkook's voice was wavering as his gaze dropped to his fidgeting fingers.

He glanced up again to see if his words had left any impact on Meisa. Still, she didn't look at him and instead seemed completely absorbed in the magazine, like he wasn't even there.

"Okay, you want the full truth?" Jungkook sat himself on the sofa next to her, his voice hushed as he shifted to face her profile. "I know we've talked about this, but to this day I still get a little bit frustrated when you say no one has to know about us. Like I'm some kind of a repulsive secret. Your dirty laundry. It just stings, you know?"

Cold sweat broke out on his forehead as he awaited Meisa's reply. However, she just sat there as if Jungkook were a radio and not an actual person to interact with.

"I know you've said a million times we can't be together. And I know the position you're in, with your family at all. I don't come from a wealthy family like yours. You said that we were too different, but I just can't stop... hoping." a quiet groan escaped Jungkook's lips as his lips buckled upwards. He quickly tried shaking the feeling off, his head snapping to the other side.

Meisa simply hummed, turning another page as she crossed her legs, swaying them slightly. Jungkook turned around to stare at her in disbelief. As hard-headed as she was, it wasn't like her to hold a grudge. She was never like that. Why wasn't she saying anything?

"Are you ignoring me now? Meisa, I apologized." he mumbled hesitantly. She had to at least appreciate that he had gone out to the lobby to talk to her. He rarely got out of there.

Still not looking at him, she bent forward to put the magazine back on the coffee table and grabbed her phone, unlocking it and starting to type something in it.

Jungkook stared at her, slack-jawed. "So I guess we're not talking in public then. Are you ashamed of me?" choking up a little bit, he spoke the words that had been weighing on him for a while now.

Meisa remained silent. His heart stuck in his throat, Jungkook stood up.

"Okay then. I get it, no need to say anything." he rasped, his arms dropping to his sides in defeat. He stood there for a couple more seconds, waiting for her to say something, just anything. When he realized she wouldn't, he spun around and started walking back to the video surveillance room with a heavy heart. Something ached deep inside his chest.

This was what he got from leaving the chair in front of his computer. He should have just stayed there. Forever.

Author's note:
Sorry if the story seems slow for now, guys. The characters are being currently introduced. I just don't want to rush things.Bear with me, action is about to start!