I took a deep breath, feeling more rested than I had ever been. The covers were snuggled up to my chin, but something was missing. One eye opened, and I realized Joshua wasn't in bed next to me. I frowned but heard the shower running.

I glanced at the clock and nearly screamed. It was almost three in the afternoon! I never slept that long! I always got up at seven, eight at the latest. But never three in the afternoon.

The door from the bathroom opened, and Joshua stepped into the bedroom with just a towel around his waist. I closed my eyes and snuggled more into the blanket.

"Are you awake?" he asked softly.

"Yeah," I said from under the blanket.

He chuckled. "I'm going to go get dressed, okay?"

"When you're done, I'm gonna hop in the shower."

"Okay."

He grabbed some clothes and headed back into the bathroom, closing the door. I sighed in relief, hoping my heart would stop racing. Busying myself by searching for clothes, I didn't realize Joshua was right behind me until he touched my shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I asked, stepping away from his hands. I didn't know if I could face him after last night.

"Can we talk?"

Yes. "No. I want to shower, Joshua."

"Fine."

He let go of me and he gently pushed me into the bathroom. I shut the door behind me, pressing my back into it. The air in there was sticky because of how hot he had the shower. I was pretty sure my face was already red, so that did not help at all.

I sent a quick text to Finlay, hoping she would answer me. She never texted me that she made it to her grandmother's house, and I was worried. I also really needed to talk to her about Joshua.

All of my shower items were already in the tub, and I silently thanked him for doing that. I had already forgotten about them.

A knock on the door made me jump. I brushed my hair out of my eyes and said, "What?"

"I'll be in the family room if you need anything," he said, his voice muffled because of the door.

"Okay. Thanks."

He replied, but I couldn't really hear him. My stomach growled, drowning out all thoughts of him. I wished I had eaten something before I got in the shower, but I was not leaving this bathroom until I was clean.

---

I was buried under pillows. It was hot and suffocating under there. But I felt the need to please Joshua's cousins, so I didn't say no. And now I was stuck.

"What in the world is going on?"

Oh thank goodness! "Joshua!" I called out.

Light soon filtered in and a concerned looking Joshua pulled me out of the mountain of pillows. "What were you doing?"

I sighed, pushing my hair out of my face. "Shannon told me that they were making tunnels with pillows and blankets. She said that I had to stay there so it could work."

He laughed, shaking his head. "They left a long time ago!"

"What?"

"Yeah!" He patted my arm as he said, "Most everyone went shopping for food. We make the best Christmas dinner, and it's always a tradition for them to go shopping."

"So, they left me like that? And I didn't even know?"

"Yeah."

I sighed, shaking my head. "That sucks. It was really hot in there!"

"Well, I can imagine!" he said, smiling. "Come on, we have to go."

He grabbed my hand and started pulling me toward the door. "Where are we going?"

"Every year, on Christmas Eve, we go out carolling."

"I'm not doing this." I stopped in my tracks, pulling him to a stop as well. "I don't sing."

"You don't dance. You don't sing. What do you do?"

"Not this."

"Stay here for a second."

He took off running, leaving me in the mudroom. I held my breath as I heard the pitter-patter of dog feet. Charlie appeared around the corner, and he barked when he saw me. He nearly knocked me down as he jumped up, trying to lick my face. "Down boy," I muttered, pushing him on the side. "What's this?"

He got off of me so I reached out and took the piece of paper out from underneath his collar. I unfurled it and burst out laughing.

Go carolling with me. Or else I won't talk to you for the rest of Christmas break.

Love, Joshie

"You can't threaten me!" I shouted. He was silent as he came back. A pout was on his face as he stood next to me. His eyes were pleading with me, but I held strong. "Those eyes won't get me to go." He got down on his knees and grabbed my hands. I sighed. "Fine."

"Yay!" He jumped up, hugging me. I stumbled backward, trying to stay up from his strong grip. My legs hit the couch, and I went down with a scream.

"Joshua!"

He chuckled, his head right above mine. His body was heavy on mine, and I bet he could feel my heart race. Just as he started to get up, another scream pierced the air.

I shoved Joshua off me, and he landed on the ground with a thud. I shot up and saw Shannon standing in the doorway with a huge grin on her face. My face flushed as she looked between the two of us. "What were you two doing?"

"We fell," I said quickly.

"That did not look like you two fell," she said, a gleeful look in her eyes. "Jamie! Josh and Grace were -"

"Were just getting ready!" I yelled. "We'll be right out!"

Joshua handed me my jacket and whispered, "You don't have to join in on the singing if you don't want to."

"Thank you," I said, accepting his offer. "I don't want people to hear me screech."

"You sounded good in the car."

"You're just biased."

"Why would I be biased?"

"Because you find me perfect," I teased, slipping my jacket on.

He just smiled at me. We followed Shannon outside and she said, "There's no room for you two in Jamie's car so you're going to have to take your own."

"I figured," Joshua said, unlocking his car. I got in the passenger seat and was surprised when she got in the backseat.

"There isn't room for you in her car?"

"Unfortunately, no." But she looked happy to be with us.

Joshua sighed, starting the car. He turned the radio down slightly as she blabbered on about who was cute at school. I laughed softly, wishing I was outgoing like her.

"I think she likes you," he whispered. He slowed to a stop, and I was surprised we already made it to the town square. "We're here."

I glanced around to see the town square all lit up. Lights were hanging from the storefronts, shining green and red against the dark wood of the gazebo in the center. "Woah . . ."

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" But he wasn't looking at the town. He was looking at me.

"Let's go carolling!" Shannon shouted, breaking my gaze away from Joshua.

Shannon hopped out of the car and he said, "We'll join them for the first few minutes and we'll slip away, okay?"

"Sounds like a plan."

We both got out and stood at the back of the group as Jamie and a guy addressed us. "That's Patrick, Jamie's husband," Joshua whispered to me. "He just got here while you were trapped under the piles of pillows."

"Ah."

As Jamie explained things, Joshua took my hands and drew me away from the group. I sent a smile to Jamie when she caught my eye. No one else seemed to notice our departure, and I was glad.

"Do you like hot chocolate?"

"It's my favorite part of winter."

"You don't like winter?"

"I hate winter," I said as we entered a small building. "I hate being cold. I hate the snow."

"But it's so pretty!" he said, gesturing outside. The Christmas lights glinted off the snow, and I nodded. It was honestly breathtaking. Our little group outside was lit up by the colors as well, giving them a halo.

"I'm not disagreeing with you," I said, shrugging. "But, I hate being cold."

"There's more than just cold, Grace," he said, laughing. "Imagine a winter day where you're stuck inside. You are sitting by the fireplace, drinking hot chocolate and eating freshly baked cookies."

"Yes, I like that," I said, nodding. "But I don't like being cooped up inside. You shouldn't, either. I thought you loved running!"

"I still go running in the snow!" he said as we got in line.

"No way."

"Yeah. I gotta keep in shape."

"I would never do that," I told him. "I could never love anything enough to go running in the snow."

He chuckled, shrugging. "It makes my head clearer."

"My head is already clear," I informed him.

"Is it?"

"Maybe."

"What would you two like?" the waitress said to us, breaking us out of our conversation.

"Just two hot chocolates, please."

"Your name?"

"Gracie," Joshua said, smiling at me. It sounded weird coming out of his mouth, but it didn't sound bad.

The girl looked between the two of us and nodded. "It'll be ready in a few minutes."

Joshua paid her, and we sat down at a table. "Winter is my favorite time of year because I get to see all my family," he said, leaning back in his chair.

"Well, I don't." I shrugged. "So maybe that's why I don't like it. Or maybe it's because my father left us on Christmas Day."

He got silent, his eyes searching mine. I tried not to shrink under his gaze. It was intense, the look he was giving me. Almost like a look of pity, but something else was there.

"Here's your hot chocolate."

The lady set it down on the table but Joshua didn't touch his. Instead, he asked, "Really?"

"Yeah."

"Why? Why would he ever leave you?"

"Uh . . ." I trailed off, scrunching up my nose. "I -"

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," he said quickly. "I'm just flabbergasted is all."

"Thanks."

I couldn't meet his eyes so I took a drink of my hot chocolate. It burned but I kept drinking. Just as I set my cup down, he grabbed my hand in his and whispered, "I would never leave you."

I tried to smile but it didn't work out. "God hasn't left me either, so don't worry."

He squeezed my hand before his eyes lit up. "You just gave me an idea."

"And that is?" His smile lifted my spirits slightly, but I was still feeling down.

"Usually, after we carol, we go to the local church and watch them put on a play about the birth of Jesus," he explained. "But what if we put it on instead?"

"Like, you and me?"

"Yeah! We can be Mary and Joseph," he said, nodding.

"Us? But what about Jamie and Patrick?" I asked. "They're the ones who are actually married."

"Jamie can be Elizabeth, John the Baptist's mother!" he said, his eyes bright. "And Eddie and the other boys can be the Three Wise Men and shepherds!"

"Oh my goodness," I said, a giggle escaping me.

"What?"

"I had an idea for it," I said, nodding.

"What?"

"What if, when we are done portraying the birth of Jesus, we can have everyone say what it means to us?"

"That's a great idea!" he said, smiling.

"Thank you."

He stood up and grabbed his hot chocolate with his free hand. "Where are you going?" I asked.

"Can we walk around for a little bit?"

"I guess."

I grabbed my hot chocolate, and we stepped into the frigid outdoors. But his hand was warm, spreading throughout my body. Warmth seeped into my bones as we stayed a good distance behind his family. I smiled as he waved to children playing in the snow. I glanced up at the stars just in time to see one shoot by. I whispered a quick wish, but I think it was already answered.