Thank you, Soraliou, for the prompt!

"Eating soup is the worst," Yuuma said.

The complaint came out of nowhere. If Arslo knew how many left field throws Yuuma would continue to make, he would've kept his comments to himself. However, like most people of the planet earth, the gods had neglected to bless him with magic foresight.

"You don't like soup?" Arslo asked.

Yuuma mimed holding a bowl with both hands. "You have to be so freaking careful when eating it or it spills all over. It's such a bother."

"What, do you just slurp it out of the bowl?" Arslo scoffed. "That's what spoons are for, idiot."

Yuuma rubbed his neck and shook his head. "C'mon bro, I've never used a spoon in my life."

It wasn't everyday that Arslo was struck speechless. He was so surprised, in fact, he took a moment to savor it before he realized that Yuuma was the last person on earth Arslo would ever expect to make him feel like this and the words from Yuuma's mouth were even more shocking then that.

"You've never used a spoon," Arslo repeated. He was sure he had heard it wrong.

Yuuma nodded, and the next thing out of his mouth sent Arslo reeling a second time.

"Spoons are for girls."

Arslo stared at him with disgusted incredulity. "Dude. Get out of here."

"What?" said Yuuma, the poster boy of oblivious. "Spoons are for girls, and forks are for guys."

"And what, knives are for dogs?"

"Dogs don't use knives."

"That's not the point," Arslo stressed. He knew not all the lights were on in Yuuma's head but had no idea the power shortage went this far. "Are you telling me you've never used a spoon because you think they're for girls?"

"Well yeah," Yuuma said. "They're like umbrellas. They're for girls."

"Hold up!" Arslo threw out his hand. "Dude, hold up. What else do you think guys can't use?"

"Is this a trick question?"

For the first time in the exchange, Yuuma looked a little hesitant, like he was being offered a candy that may or may not have been licked by the giver. On the flip side, the expression on his friend's face could only be described as the look of a man betrayed in his final moments by the general who had led him into battle.

"Oh my God," Arslo said in disbelief. "Have you always been a moron?"