Namjoon woke up but not to the usual sound of his friends all loudly yelling about nonsense like they always did. He was not shaken awake roughly by Jungkook's hand so that when he opened his eyes he saw the sight of him grinning down at him happily. No, this morning he found himself waking up rather peacefully instead. It was the softest sound of voices coming in from the building outside and the scent of something cooking that caused him to open his eyes. The first thing he saw through his squinted eyes was the bump of the leather armrest and so he lifted his sleep-heavy head.

Inside the building was rather empty right now. In fact only he, Seokjin and Jungkook were inside. That meant that Taehyung, Hoseok, Yoongi and Jimin were outside. He faintly recalled the sight of Yoongi climbing onto flatbed last night, one of the last memories he had before he had ended up falling asleep. Of course Yoongi had done that for Jimin had been asleep in there after they had watched all of the recordings: the camcorder recordings. From that point he had went inside the building to rest but Taehyung and Hoseok had also stayed on the backseat that they had dragged outside. That was where the others were, sleeping outside in the open air with the sun starting to rise on the horizon.

The camcorder memories.

Namjoon yawned and reached up to rub at his heavy eyelids, trying his hardest to get them to stay open. He didn't know what time it was but it only felt early. He wouldn't at all be surprised if the sky was still a very pale shade of blue that signaled the sun was still rising. After all the interior was only dimly lit enough to create strong shadows and a little illumination. Namjoon dropped his hands back to his lap and he studied the worn knees of his jeans for a moment as he collected his thoughts. It felt like there was something at the back of his mind that he just couldn't grab hold of, something that required snagging with a hook to be pulled to the front.

Ah, the camcorder! That was what he had been thinking of before his yawn had dislodged the thought. He had been thinking about how last night had been good, or at least mostly good. There had been a few bad things here and there, like the drunken yelling Taehyung recording and he supposed the one with Soonshim, but mostly the memories had been good. Had been refreshing. Namjoon would be lying if he said that he suddenly felt everything was fine again. It wasn't, wasn't even close, but it felt better and that was all that mattered. Yes, they still had many hurdles to get over and much dialogue to be had but at least some of the tension had faded from the air.

He had been amazed to find himself forgetting quite a lot of what he had seen last night. From the day at Han River and the "Yoongi Fish", to Hoseok's birthday bike. But mostly, Jungkook's graduation. How had he forgotten most of that? It had only been a few years ago, when he had been in his final year of high school set to graduate too, Hoseok lagging behind by a year for his misbehaviour. How had the sight of Jungkook in his middle school uniform escaped his mind already? That same sensation of feeling older than he was had returned once more. Well, he supposed that it was only natural that he had ended up replacing some of these memories with new ones after what had happened last year; the adventure.

But still, it didn't feel right. Namjoon felt that he should have retained those memories instead. He should have held onto things like Jungkook's graduation and learning to play poker for the first time, not racing to hospital in the very early morning hours to see if Jimin was still breathing or burying the dead body of a friend's father. He supposed that the bad memories always lingered no matter what else happened, pushing away the good in favour of the bad. Taehyung was a prime example of this. Namjoon let his breath out in a heavy sigh and then he lifted his gaze to look across the room.

Seokjin was currently awake across the room, squeezed onto the other single broken car seat beside Jungkook. The boy was still sleeping from what he could see, chest rising and falling softly under the blanket. Seokjin had one elbow cocked up so that he could rest his head in the palm of his hand, and his other hand was currently playing with Jungkook's hair. He didn't look that tired from what he could see, just seemed to be deep in his thoughts as he twirled a lock of dark hair around his forefinger tightly and then let go of it; leaving the black lock slightly kinked.

"Good morning," Namjoon said as he shifted to sit up properly. This allowed him to stretch his legs at least. Looking at Seokjin cramped on the seat made his muscles feel all tight and so he rolled his shoulders a few times. Stiff neck. Not a surprise considering the position he had fallen asleep in.

"Good morning to you too," Seokjin replied, eyes lifting to look up at him for a second or two before dropping again. From outside the building still came the sound of low voices and he was pretty certain that Yoongi was one of them. Were the rest of them awake? Had he slept longer than them for once? That was strange, he would be surprised to learn if that was the case.

"Last night was fun, huh?"

"Yes it was," Seokjin agreed with a soft nod. "It was needed, really needed. We shouldn't have left it that long. But there's no point worrying about that now. At least we tried it, that's what counts." Namjoon studied him for a moment and he wondered if he should ask him if he thought that it had done anything; if he thought that the memories had solved anything. Had they? Had last night done anything or had it just been a temporary distraction?

"Mmm, it was nice," Jungkook mumbled in a soft and sleepy voice. The boy was in fact awake and just lying there and letting their eldest friend play with his hair it would seem. It felt like a long time since Namjoon had seen the boy so willing to accept physical contact that he hadn't initiated. "We should do it again, there's a lot of recordings still left."

"Not just yet Kookie," Seokjin said with a smile. "Let's test the waters first."

"Like the...the beach?"

"No, I meant metaphorically," Jungkook made a noise at this, a soft little "oh" that made Seokjin's smile lift up higher at the corners. It seemed that the boy wasn't really awake after all, but rather still mostly asleep.

"Wanna go back to the beach," Jungkook mumbled as he shifted to roll onto his side, burrowing along the seat to get closer to their eldest friend. "That was a nice day." The boy's voice was muffled slightly for he had pressed his face against his chest. "And the national park too, they were good days."

"There have been plenty of good days Kookie," Namjoon said as he reached up to brush a hand through his own messy hair. "Just 'cos a bad thing happens doesn't mean that the entire day is ruined, right?"

"Bad things happen," Seokjin agreed. "It can't all be good, so we just need to handle the bad when it happens. It also can't all be bad."

"Feels like it can," Jungkook said, the sound of his jeans rustling on the leather seat like the whisper of grass in a breeze.

"So uh, what happens next exactly?" Namjoon asked as he stopped fixing his hair and looked between them both. Jungkook just lay where he was, unmoving and seemingly very comfortable. Seokjin shifted his gaze to look at him and he stayed quiet for a moment, deep in thought. He had asked a question that was both vague and also broad. There were so many possible answers to his question and it seemed that neither of them had answers to it. After a minute of silence Seokjin quietly said that he didn't know. His expression showed that he felt bad for admitting that he didn't know, just like always.

Namjoon dropped his hand to his lap and he fiddled with a stray thread on his jeans. The silence in the building almost demanded that it be broken somehow but he wasn't sure what to say. There was a clattering sound from outside and he glanced at the open doorway before deciding that he wanted to check what was going on. So he climbed off the car seat, wincing at his stiff legs, and walked across the room to lean against the frame.

He was greeted to the sight of Yoongi and Jimin seated in the grass with the hotplate out. It seemed that they were attempting to make something on the hotplate, attempting being the operative word. There were a few plastic bags placed on the ground and one was currently open because Jimin was picking at something inside with chopsticks.

"Minnie stop eating that," Yoongi replied, unlit cigarette stuck behind his ear. "There'll be none left." Jimin mumbled a rather unapologetic sorry with his mouth full of fried food. That was when Namjoon figured out that they had been to the market; the morning one. Why exactly he didn't know but it seemed that they had bought food and were in the midst of making breakfast despite the early hour.

"Is the water boiling?" Jimin asked, cheeking the mandu as he did. There was a dribble of sauce in the corner of his mouth and Yoongi reached over to rub to free with his thumb, slipping it inside his own mouth to lick it clean rather than wipe it on his jeans.

"No, taking fucking forever," Yoongi muttered as he stared at the pan. It was the same large one they had used last time they had made ramyun. "How does Jin cook shit on these things?"

"It's called patience and lots of skills," Namjoon retorted as he folded his arms over his chest. Yoongi looked up sharply at his voice and then smirked before dropping his attention back down to the pan. "It's just ramyun, why're you making it look so hard?"

"It is hard," Yoongi retorted as he hovered his hand over the pan. He seemed to be trying to test the heat with his palm. "And there's more than ramyun."

"Oh yeah? So what is there?"

"Real food," he explained as he picked up the packet and tore it open. He pulled the noodle cake free and snapped it in half before adding it to the pan. "Gonna take awhile but this morning we'll have real food for breakfast."

Namjoon went into the shower to kill some time, wanting to freshen up from last night. The heat of the water helped clear his mind but sadly it didn't allow any new ones to appear and fill the space in his thoughts. No, he just ended up leaving the shower feeling light and clean and by that point Yoongi had managed to cook the noodles through enough for them to have started to soften and swell. A quick glance inside the building showed that Seokjin and Jungkook were still awake but hadn't moved to leave. On the backseat Taehyung appeared to be waking up slowly, eyes opening every few seconds and then closing again, breath leaving his lips to ruffle Hoseok's hair.

"Minnie," Yoongi nagged again, not even looking at his lover but no doubt hearing the plastic bag rustling as he opened it again.

"Hey, this bite wasn't for me."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah it was for you," Jimin explained, holding the disposable chopsticks up with a chunk of mandu and fried onions slathered in sauce. Yoongi eyed it and then he opened his mouth so that he could feed him it. Jimin beamed at him and then he shifted to grab another chunk of mandu and offered it out to him. Namjoon sat down cross-legged on the floor and accepted the bite.

"Smooth Minnie, smooth," Yoongi said as he ripped open the stock packet and poured the powder into the pot. The scent of spiced stock made Namjoon's nose itch and it spread out in the water to turn the contents a deep orange.

"Why exactly are you two doing this?" Yoongi stopped stirring the contents and glanced up at him, eyebrows raising ever so softly. After a few seconds he added. "The breakfast, all of the cooking, going to the market. I was just curious, is all."

"...Just wanted to do something nice," Yoongi said in a quiet voice.

Namjoon watched him carry on stirring at the pan contents and he suddenly wondered if he had said something wrong. Had his question been too brusque? Was it not obvious why Yoongi had done this? It was his own way of apologising for what had happened that day, the argument and the fighting. His friend had made this breakfast as his own way of saying sorry even though he had said sorry countless times already. They would all get to sit around and enjoy this meal and just like the camcorder, it would make everything start to feel stable again.

Families that shared meals weren't broken families, they were whole and fine.

"Besides, if the rest of 'em don't wake up," Yoongi remarked as he shifted to sit upright, "they don't get any food."

From the inside of the building came the unmistakable sound of Jungkook's voice calling out that he was most certainly awake; that nothing could stop him from having food.

"Then get your ass over here kid!"

Within the next few minutes everyone was awake, including Hoseok though he looked like he would much rather be curled up asleep on the backseat instead. It took a tug on his wrist from Taehyung to get him to move down into the grass. Hoseok didn't even seem capable of keeping his eyes open and yet he just sat there, Taehyung's hand around his wrist to almost ensure that he stayed in place. Namjoon was aware of the fact that they had all been worrying about Taehyung after he had attacked Yoongi the other day but that they hadn't really thought about Hoseok at all. He had had his diary thrown about, his secrets spilled and rather carelessly handled. What was he feeling like right now? Judging from his face, not very good.

"Who's birthday is it again?" Seokjin asked as he reached up to fiddle with his hair. "I've gotten so old now I've forgotten..."

"Ha-ha," Yoongi faux-laughed. "Shut up and enjoy the food or I'll never do this again."

"Yoongi cooking..." Jungkook cocked his head as he eyed the bag. "Thought that you only went for instant stuff, or take away?" Yoongi retorted that living alone, and then with Jimin meant that he had had to learn to cook too. This made Jimin loudly argue that he could cook too, just that he burnt things sometimes. His lover then added that it was because he forgotten that he had started cooking in the first place.

"Oh yeah, well let's see if you can cook something other than ramyun, huh?" Jimin opened the plastic bags and pulled out several containers of food: the mandu that they had all taken little bites of, a large Styrofoam container of bibimbap and smaller plastic ones with kimchi and namul in. Then he was holding out a package, one that was made from brown paper smeared with grease spots.

Yoongi moved the pan of finished ramyun down onto the soil and then he was grabbing the suspicious-looking package to open it. The scent coming from it wafted over and that was when Namjoon figured out that it was.

Samgyeopsal slices wrapped up in thick slices of grease paper.

"We'll get food poisoning!" Seokjin declared as he figured out what Yoongi was doing. He was going to just simply slap the thin cuts of pork onto the hotplate without single care and grill it like that. It was enough to make Jungkook and Taehyung start laughing and Yoongi just opened the paper as if he hadn't heard him. "Are you seriously going to grill meat like that?"

"Hey, do you want samgyeopsal or not?"

Between mouthfuls of ramyun, kimchi, namul and what was left of the mandu Yoongi grilled the pork on the hotplate. When each slice was ready he leaned over and offered them from the ends of his chopsticks. Namjoon found that the food still tasted great even if the preparation had been rudimentary and possibly dangerous. It didn't stop him from enjoying the samgyeopsal and even Seokjin accepted some when their friend waved the meat in front of his face.

"We should've tried this earlier," Taehyung replied as he licked the remains of meat juice of his fingers. "We could've been eating like kings the whole time."

"This is your idea of eating like a king?" Jimin asked in amusement. Taehyung nodded vigorously over the sounds of the meat sizzling on the plate. "Bet Namjoon's got some deep shit to say about this."

"Me?" Namjoon lowered his bottle of water and eyed the pair of them for a moment before speaking. "It doesn't matter how bountiful a meal is-"

"Oh here we go," Yoongi muttered with a grin, turning the samgyeopsal over as he did.

"So long as a meal is shared with friends. That's true richness," Namjoon finished, seeing that his friends were trying to not laugh at his words. It had been quite some time since they had asked him to break out any philosophical musings and they had probably figured out exactly why after that reply. But after a few seconds Jungkook shifted and he him leaning over.

"That was nice, I liked that," Jungkook said and Namjoon felt the unmistakable sensation of his fingers touching his hair. The boy was patting him on the head like he was a puppy and everyone watched this in a mixture of amusement and confusion. His fingers tangled slightly in his damp hair.

"What?" Namjoon asked in as the boy stopped patting his head and sat back in the grass. "Is this a new reward system?"

"Hey don't pat him for talking shit," Taehyung argued, stirring at the ramyun as he did. "He'll never fucking stop."

"Yeah, pat me for being cute instead," Jimin declared, causing a slight ripple of laughter.

"I'll pat you if you entertain me," Jungkook explained, grabbing a chunk of mandu as he did. Taehyung asked what he meant by that, lifting an eyebrow in a suggestive wave as he did. "Not like that Tae."

Yoongi lifted the slice of pork off the plate and he turned to hold it out to Hoseok. Their friend had already had a slice earlier, they all had with the exception of Yoongi and yet he was offering him another. He had probably noticed that Hoseok had barely touched any of the food and this was his attempt at making him eat more, casually offering him the samgyeopsal as if it was nothing.

"Will flattery get me a pat?" Jimin asked as he sipped at the stock left in the bottom of his cup. Hoseok quietly accepted the meat off Yoongi and their friend paused to shovel a massive mouthful of noodles into his mouth before tossing the last slice of pork on the plate. When Jungkook nodded his lips lifted in a wide grin. "Ah, our Jungkookie has gotten so smart and handsome, I-" Jungkook interrupted him to add in the word "tall" and Jimin's smile faltered ever so slightly, "and tall too, I'm so proud of our Jungkookie."

"You sound like my mom," the boy said with a grin as he reached over and patted Jimin's head like promised. "But it's cute."

"Not as cute as Jungkookie~"

"God, Badass has now turned into Suckass," Taehyung remarked before laughing to himself. "Hey, have you ever actually su-"

"Tae, not at the dinner table," Seokjin spoke over him, seemingly forgetting that there was no table present at all. When they all started laughing he looked mildly surprised before he realised and then he was laughing too. "Well, not over the hotplate anyway."

"Not like I've ever had a dinner table," Taehyung said in an offhand fashion. His words sounded more brusque than he had clearly intended and Hoseok paused in the act of sipping from his own cup. Namjoon wasn't certain if anyone else noticed but he saw the way Hoseok's eyes slowly shifted over to look at his lover and then he lowered the cup again. Taehyung just carried on eating as if he hadn't said a single thing. As if he hadn't just said that he had never had a dinner table when he had been spending the entire year living with Hoseok and his parents.

Namjoon didn't know the ins and outs of their relationship exactly but he knew that Taehyung and adults didn't get along. Period. It wasn't a problem with certain adults, with clashing personalities or ideas. It was just adults. Taehyung seemed to find older women untrustworthy, always scared that they would run off on him like his mother had done multiple times through his childhood. To say that he was scared of older men wasn't exactly correct. Namjoon had felt conflicting reactions from him in regards to situations; from antagonistic to unsettled to borderline flirtatious. Sometimes he made it his mission to piss off older men, sometimes he looked like he wanted to be as far away from them as possible. All were results of his childhood of course. Which was why he likely didn't get along with his lover's parents but still...

Hoseok had looked like he had suffered yet another blow upon hearing his words.

"We've all had dinner tables open to you Tae," Namjoon said after a moment of thought. "All you had to do was knock and we'd have let you in." Taehyung made a noise at this but didn't speak, too busy fiddling with the ramyun to look at any of them.

"Hoseok?" Jungkook asked suddenly, voice soft. "How're you feeling today? Do you feel OK?"

"...Not really," Hoseok replied after a few seconds. "Sorry I just-" Seokjin told him that he didn't need to apologise for his feelings. "It's not OK right now."

Well, it wasn't like they had expected him to be okay but at least he had been honest with them. Hoseok wasn't lying about being fine, like he had for last year and most of the past two weeks. He wasn't pretending to be fine like Taehyung still was, with wide smiles and attempts at jokes to put them all at ease. No, he had told them that he was feeling bad and this was a good sign. It meant that he was willing to tell them, even if it was just a word or two.

Now if only Taehyung would open up and tell them things too. If only he would look them in the eyes and tell them that he needed help because he was starting to lose it again. Not because of alcohol, not because he was drunk and in denial of his own actions. Namjoon wanted Taehyung to be honest and tell them all that he needed help because he was losing his grip on both his sanity and reality. Their friend was living in a fractured world of dreams and ideals right now and he was refusing to accept what would come next for them all. If Taehyung didn't wake up soon then it was going to be even more painful for him to have to deal with.

"If you need to talk you know we'll listen," Hoseok asked him if he needed to talk about something, not exactly reflecting the topic away from himself but close to it. Jungkook seemed to think this over for a moment and his gaze shifted to look at Seokjin as he did. He nibbled on the end of his chopsticks before pulling them away from his mouth. "No, all I have to say is that I love you guys."

"Kookie's acting like a pussy again," Taehyung said with a smirk.

"Shit Tae it's not-" Jungkook stopped talking and he let out his breath in a heavy sigh. One look at his face showed that he was trying to not get annoyed, at the way he had set his jaw and looked off across the clearing rather than at his friend. "It's not being a pussy, OK? I love you guys. I said it 'cos I feel that we don't say that shit as much as we should."

"Kookie," Taehyung glanced up at him. "We already know all of that shit, you don't have to tell us."

"Well I want to tell you," Jungkook replied, lips pouted out sullenly. "If we all just said shit instead of ignoring it we wouldn't be in shit would we?"

"I didn't-"

"I love you guys too," Jimin interrupted, stopping this from going any further. "Even when you're all assholes."

"Amen," Yoongi agreed as he lifted the last slice of samgyeopsal and took a bite from it. "You're all fucking assholes but so am I."

"I haven't tasted real coffee in so long I might just get used to the instant kind," Seokjin remarked as he pressed the button on the machine. The water came out with a low hissing sound and he lifted the container up to stir at it with a wooden stick. It wouldn't remove the powdery clumps completely, it never did. "It feels like a sin to even say that aloud but it's true."

"And here I was thinking there was only instant shit," Yoongi replied, his own container on the counter on front of him. He was sitting on the stool but slumped over so that he could place his elbows on it. Stools didn't provide enough slouching room for him so it was a good thing that there was a counter for him instead.

Namjoon glanced over the gas station to see that there were a few people inside but they all looked to be leaving as soon as they had paid for their things. Not like them. The owner of this place would probably get sick of seeing them every day or two, blocking the window view and always looking so miserable. They hardly splurged cash, just bought gas when needed and cheap food and drinks. He wondered what they all looked like to the workers on the till, for there seemed to be at least three different ones on shifts. Did they think they were on a college break down on the coast, living cheaply so that they could stretch the fun out for longer? Did they think they were drifters perhaps? Maybe just even poor young men struggling to make ends meet, they wouldn't be far off from the truth.

When Namjoon looked at his friends he saw dog tired faces. He saw threadbare bodies held together by threads at this point. They had sutured themselves up and over and yet the wounds were not healing. That much was clear. The sutures weren't helping, weren't keeping them closed. No, the threads were just loose and every time something went wrong they were being tugged on so that they dragged on their flesh and caused even more pain.

"Please tell me you don't give it to Jimin," Seokjin remarked as he crossed the station and sat down on the end of the counter.

"Minnie still drinks milkshakes like a three year old," Yoongi retorted. "Trust me when I say coffee isn't exactly on his list of delicacies."

Namjoon didn't know exactly why they were at the gas station again, just that it seemed like the best place to talk. It wasn't that they wanted to talk about the others or anything like that but the fact remained that they needed to talk about something. About everything really. It should have been the eldest gathered together like this, Seokjin and Yoongi and Hoseok but Hoseok was back with the others. It wasn't like he would have done much talking anyway. Not when he was the topic of most of the discussion. It made Namjoon feel older than he was, and strange in a way. He was right in the middle of the ages, neither the older nor younger. The middle child.

"Please don't get him hooked on this shit then," Seokjin said as he pulled the stick free and placed it down on the counter. Yoongi promised that he wouldn't. "I can't get through a day in college without at least two cups of coffee over the course of the morning. It's getting out of hand. I'm getting hooked like a drug."

"It's hardly the worst drug," Namjoon remarked as he eyed his own coffee. Yes, on the list of addictions that they had had to deal with it was hardly anything. Gambling, medication, self-harming, alcohol. Coffee was almost a blessing. Seokjin reached inside his pocket to pull his phone free without a word. "I would hardly say your love of coffee is something we need to sit down and talk about."

"Of all the things we would talk about," Yoongi joked. "That would be the only one. Fuck important shit like suicidal urges and depression, let's talk about Jin and his illicit love of coffee." Seokjin had his phone in hand and he was paying great attention to what was on the screen. Namjoon didn't know what he was looking at but his eyes were moving side to side and his thumb was running along the screen every few seconds. "Anything yet?" Yoongi asked in a quiet voice, sparing a quick glance over at the phone as he did.

"Nothing, there's literally nothing," their friend explained, still staring at the screen intently. "I've been checking every few days."

"Checking for what exactly?" Namjoon looked between them both, knowing that they knew something that he didn't.

"For news about his father," Seokjin explained as he lowered his phone. "Tae's father." He had expected something like this and yet hearing it still surprised him. All of this time he hadn't even thought to check himself. Was it because he had been scared to check just in case there had been news about it all? That was possibly why, but he still should have checked. Checking was smart and it seemed that he had done something foolish for once. "There's literally no news. Not even a missing person's report. It's been two weeks, how long exactly are we supposed to wait and see if anything happens?"

"I don't wanna say that we got away with murder," Yoongi remarked in a quiet voice. "But I think that we did." Trust their friend to address it in such a harsh and unflinching way. He might have been blunt but he was telling the truth. Two weeks without a missing report was starting to look like a good thing. Sure none of them were safe yet, they likely wouldn't ever be entirely safe, but they couldn't stay on the run forever.

"What does getting away with it mean exactly?" Seokjin asked as he placed his phone down on the counter. He kept his gaze on it however, rather than look up at them or out of the window.

"Going back to Seoul?" Namjoon suggested. But their eldest friend just sighed and said that they couldn't do that. Not after what had happened that day: the fight. "Well we can't just stay here forever. Kookie's gotta get back home before his parents cave and call the police on us. Hoseok needs help. We've got college and our lives to go back to, like Yoongi said. I mean, hypothetically even if we didn't have all of that shit we still couldn't stay here forever."

"Tell that to Tae."

"I will, I'll tell it to him and the others."

"He might just strangle you," Yoongi retorted, tone not bitter or angry but rather just low and cautious. Considering everything he had every right now to be angry and yet he didn't seem to look it at all.

"He didn't mean it-"

"I know he didn't mean it Jin but," he gestured at the marks on his throat, the faint but still visible fingerprints left behind from Taehyung's fingers. Not bruises exactly but still dark enough to pass for them, like smears of dirt on his skin. "Look, it had to be me that said it. I know that it had to be me and I don't care about that shit. I'm almost glad that Tae attacked me instead just so he didn't hurt anyone else like the kids."

The kids, who were a little too old to be called that now. But despite this fact it still seemed correct to call them that. Maybe it was because of their still immature actions? Namjoon didn't know but he also thought that there was chance that they did it to try and cling onto the last link that they had to their childhoods. So long as Jungkook still wore a school uniform then it would remind them all that they weren't that old yet. But then again, they always had Taehyung refusing to grow up too. It would be pretty hard to feel mature in his presence.

"It had to be me 'cos it was blunt. It was blunt and mean and so neither of you could say it." Seokjin quietly said that he didn't think that it was mean, looking down at his steaming instant coffee container. "It was mean. I said some horrible shit and I wish I could take it back but I can't now." Yoongi shifted on the stool and looked out of the window with a heavy sigh. "We're playing with grenades right now. One wrong move and we'll pull a pin and it'll blow up in our fucking faces."

"Tae's in a sensitive mental state right now," Namjoon said after a moment of thought. "I guess we all are but he is the most, and as a result Hoseok's suffering too. That's why it feels that way. Gotta be careful with sensitive things man."

"I'm not good with sensitive things."

"That's bullshit Yoongi," Seokjin disagreed with a head shake. "You handle Jimin and he's probably the most sensitive person on the planet. You can handle sensitive things. What happened wasn't because you can't; it's what happened because you got upset."

"I didn't mean to," Yoongi said in a voice barely above a whisper.

"We know you didn't," their eldest friend agreed, placing a hand on his shoulder as he did. "What happened was like...dragging all of the demons out at once. It was painful and frightening but it's done now. Now is the time for an exorcism to get rid of the demons."

"A purge," Namjoon said as he tapped his fingers on the counter in an offbeat rhythm.

"Yes, we've screamed it all out. Time for healing." Seokjin squeezed hold of Yoongi's shoulder and then moved to lift up his coffee and take a sip. "We can heal, we just need to try."

"You really think that we can?" Yoongi asked in a quiet voice, moving his eyes so that he could look at their friend. When Seokjin nodded he seemed to think this over for a minute. "I dunno, I hope that we can but I dunno if that's possible."

"'Cos of Tae?" Namjoon asked, knowing that the question was rather pointless.

"We've gotta take him home. Back to Seoul. We can't do this shit anymore, we're not children."

"Tae doesn't think he has a home," Seokjin remarked over the brim of Styrofoam cup. "It's clear that's why he doesn't want to go back. Taean County is his home now - no wait." He paused for a moment and furrowed his brow. "It's not Taean County that he wants to stay for. It's us. "

"Us?"

"Yes, it's us," Seokjin repeated before nodding, confirming his thoughts as he did. "Tae wants us to stay together, and when we go back to Seoul that won't happen. We'll split up again. Not forever but because we have to, because of jobs and school and other things. That's what he doesn't want."

"The family thing," Yoongi muttered, no doubt remembering what Taehyung had said when he had started strangling him the other day. About how he couldn't break their family up.

"But you're right, we need to go back." Seokjin sighed and folded his arms up on the counter. "It's not like the adventure anymore, not knowing until it was too late and then having to act. We know, we have known all along. So we need to act before it's too late."

"Before bad shit happens." Namjoon watched a car pull up at the pumps outside. "Gotta get Hoseok some help. He needs it. You guys didn't even see the shit in that notebook but Jimin did. Jimin saw all of it."

"I saw a lighthouse, a sketch of a lighthouse and someone jumping off it. That's what I saw before I confronted 'em," Yoongi said as his fingers fiddled with the cuff of his bomber jacket. "That's why I got upset."

"That sketch...that wasn't Hoseok," Seokjin clarified. "The figure in the sketch, it was Tae." They both shifted to look at him and he seemed to hesitate before explaining about an incident at the lighthouse that Hoseok had told him about; of how Taehyung had joked about jumping off the side and had scared the others. Namjoon saw Yoongi tensing up at this, his hands curling up into tight little fists on his lap. Seokjin made sure to add that it had been a joke, just that he was uncertain about if that really was the case.

"Why didn't you say something Jin?" Yoongi asked in a low voice, still tense.

"I had been hoping that Tae would say something instead, but of course he didn't." Seokjin sighed and reached up to rub at his brow. "Only Hoseok told me. Kookie and Jimin and Tae said nothing. If Hoseok hadn't told me then I wouldn't have known. I would be in the dark too."

"So Hoseok will talk," Yoongi made a soft noise under his breath. "But only about Tae."

"I asked him if he was feeling suicidal and he said no," Seokjin added. "So it's hard to trust most of what he says about himself. And Tae...did Tae know or was he clueless all along?"

Namjoon furrowed his brow at this, confused by what he had said. If Taehyung had known that Hoseok was feeling suicidal why wouldn't he have said anything? It made no sense to him, because surely he would want his lover to be safe. So that meant that he really must have been clueless. But before he could even attempt to question this Yoongi shifted suddenly and reached into his jeans pocket to pull his phone out. He unlocked it and checked his screen before letting his breath out in a soft sigh.

"Minnie just texted me," Yoongi placed his phone on the counter. "Everything's OK right now, they're just chilling. Nothing bad."

"I thought Kookie was gonna get pissed with Tae before," Namjoon said, "for calling him a pussy." Yoongi muttered that it was to be expected, that it was typical Taehyung. "Yeah I know but still, the kid was trying to be nice. Surely Tae should've figured that out."

"Kookie's having a rough time right now," Yoongi agreed. "He's the youngest, he's going to feel like this is all his fault. Y'know what it's like."

"You're making it sound like a divorce right now," Namjoon joked and though Yoongi smiled it didn't look entirely amused. "Hey Jin?" Their eldest friend turned his head to look at him, eyebrows raising under the fall of hair on his brow. "Do you know if there's anything going on with him right now? With Kookie?"

"More than usual?" Seokjin asked, intending it as a lighthearted joke. "I...I guess there is. Personal things." He seemed to think this over and then he started fiddling with the wooden stick. There was a smear of coffee on the end. "I can't really explain it because he doesn't even know, not really."

"Is it about his parents?" Yoongi asked. But Seokjin shook his head and said that it wasn't anything like that. "School?"

"No, it's about his...well I guess it's about his sexuality." He was fiddling with the stick even more now. "I don't know, I can't explain it really. Kookie would need to, he knows what he feels more than I do. It's not related to this situation right now, so I guess it's not drastically important."

"Feelings for girls or guys? Or both?" Yoongi asked, eyes narrowing with interest as he did. Namjoon realised that this was the first time that they had really spoken about Jungkook in such a way; a romantic way. The boy had just never spoken of such things before and so the topic had never been brought up but now that Seokjin had mentioned it he also felt curious.

"Feelings for neither," Seokjin replied. "Just us, just friends. Nothing remotely sexual."

The gas station fell silent and then Seokjin lifted his coffee and drank the remains. Yoongi studied him for a moment before turning his head to look at him. He saw surprise in his eyes but nothing more than that.

Namjoon understood what Seokjin was talking about completely but he knew that others wouldn't. Jungkook was a single child. How would his parents react to hearing something like that? No matter what the boy did there always seemed to be a problem of some kind, so him telling him that he was asexual? Namjoon had a feeling that telling them he was gay would have probably been easier to deal with, despite everything. Yes, it might not be important in regards to what was happening right now but it was most certainly important. Jungkook needed to know that nothing was wrong, that he was no different from the rest even if others told him he was. Maybe somewhere else in the world everything would be fine but not here; not with the current social climate. Jungkook needed to know that no matter others said, what society told him, they would love him anyway.

"So if he wants to show affection, please let him. Even if it's surprising or maybe uncomfortable for you; please just let him."

"Jin, when Kookie said this did he-"

"He kissed me," Seokjin finished over him. "A friend kiss apparently."

"Shit I don't care," Yoongi shrugged roughly. "If it makes Kookie happy I don't give a shit. He can pat my head or hold my hand or kiss me."

"Same here," Namjoon agreed. "We've seen him grow up since he was six, what kind of friends would we be if we acted different. Is that why he's always been a little...I dunno, he never talks about shit. He always go quiet. It's hard to understand him most of the time."

"I'm sure Kookie will be relieved to hear it," Seokjin said before pausing for a few seconds. "So, now we've covered Kookie. Anything else we need to talk about?"

The drive back out of Taean County was one that was silent and rather calm. Namjoon sat in the backseat, elbow rested on the window and the breeze coming in through the open window. They had nothing to really talk about now, had already said everything that they had needed to back at the gas station. Therefore it seemed rather pointless talking about anything else, like it was just an excuse to fill the silence. They had no need to do anything like that now. No, it felt rather peaceful sitting in the quiet and Namjoon didn't mind it at all. Once they got back to the building there would be more than enough noise like always, so the current silence was golden.

"Y'know, I saw something in one of the newspapers," Yoongi said in a quiet voice from the passenger-seat. "There's gonna be a meteor shower tonight."

"Really?" Namjoon asked, seeing Seokjin glancing over at their friend in the driver-seat.

"Yeah, something with "P" in it I think? P...something?"

"Perseid."

"That's the one Joonie, yeah so anyway, I was thinking..." Yoongi paused for a moment and then finished. "I was thinking that we should go and see it together. One last sight to see in Taean County before we go, right?"

"Sounds like a good idea," Seokjin agreed after a moment. "Enjoy one last good memory together and leave in the morning."

"If you're lucky Tae will still be asleep and not know until we're halfway across South Chungcheong."

Namjoon turned his attention back to the window to see that the view outside was starting to get industrial. That meant that they were nearly out of the city and soon enough they would be back with the others. Yoongi had a good point but he doubted that they would need to do something like that. If they told Taehyung that they were going back to Seoul together, as a family, then what could he really do? He couldn't stop them, not if they broke the news to him gently. That was why Seokjin was going to tell them all instead, because he could handle the situation.

Taehyung would have to come with them if he wanted the family to stay together. That was his options, come with them and stay a family or stay behind and lose them. It seemed harsh but it was what he had left them with, they had no other options. Namjoon was willing to bet that he would agree to come with them so long as they kept their word and stayed together. How long they would need to stay together was uncertain but he was sure that they could figure that out too.

So long as they stuck together and worked together then Namjoon knew that they could figure it all out.

It took just another few minutes for them to get to the outskirts and the home. The car stopped just outside of the building and sure enough, sitting up on the low roof there was Taehyung. Their friend was sitting on the edge and kicking his legs back and forth. The heels of his bare feet hovered just a single inch above the front window. He would have gotten up there easily, probably would have just climbed up the pipe or maybe found a slight dent in the bricks and had gotten up like a climbing wall. Either way he looked very comfortable up there, and at the sound of the car engine he dropped his head from looking up at the sky to look at them instead.

"Tae?!" Seokjin called as he stepped out of the car. Their friend called back to let him know that he had heard. "Come down a minute, we all need to talk about something."

"About what?!" Taehyung shouted back, leaning forward as he did.

"Something important."

Namjoon climbed out the car and glanced over to see that Seokjin had entered the building and Yoongi was just on his heel. That meant that Taehyung was staring at him and waiting to see if he added anything onto this statement. So Namjoon walked around the front of the car and stopped just in front of the window, lifting a hand up to gesture for him to come down. After a moment of hesitation Taehyung shifted onto his knees and he lowered himself down backwards. Namjoon grabbed his hips even though he didn't need the assistance and helped him down.

"Is this about me?" Taehyung asked in a quiet voice as he let go of the wall and brushed his hands roughly on his tee. The same yellow one, now covered in brick dust rather than blood stains.

"No Tae," he replied with a head shake. "It's not about you, don't worry." His friend thought this over for a moment and then let his breath out in a heavy sigh of relief. "Let's just go inside, yeah?"

Inside the building Namjoon found that their three other friends were settled on the backseat. It looked like Hoseok had fallen asleep at some point but he was now awake again, head balanced on Jungkook's shoulder. Jimin was on the other end and he looked to have been finishing the carving on the plywood board that he and Jungkook had started making; Swiss Knife in hand. Yoongi had sat down on the broken settee and Seokjin was cross-legged on the floor in front of the trio. Namjoon crossed the room to sit down beside Yoongi but Taehyung just hovered at Seokjin's side rather anxiously. It wasn't clear what he was thinking about but it was clear that his thoughts were making him nervous.

"We've thought this over and we've came to a decision." Seokjin explained. On the end of the backseat Jimin closed the knife over and left it on the board, doing so slowly. Taehyung fingers were running along his lower lips rather like he was smearing them with gloss, but Namjoon knew that he was picking at them like always. Their friend was always gnawing or picking his lips raw when he got nervous. "This isn't a reckless idea, but something we've been talking about for quite a few days now."

"Seokjin," Yoongi said, urging him on so he would get to the point.

"Today is going to be our last day in Taean County," Seokjin said slowly, slow and clear so that everyone could understand him. "Then we're going back to Seoul, we're not going to split up." He clarified, lifting a hand up just as Taehyung shifted uncomfortably. "We're going as a family. We're going back to Seoul and we're going to fix it all, OK?"

"Fix it like what?" Hoseok asked in a quiet voice.

"We're going to try and fix it all. Kookie's current situation, after his argument with his mother and his medication," Seokjin explained in that same steady fashion. "We'll fix that up. And we'll help you Hoseok. You'll get to see Doctor Lee again."

"For this to work, for our family to work, we've gotta help each other," Namjoon added. "That means not running away from our problems but facing 'em together. We're stronger together. What's happening right now, we can fix."

"Yeah...yeah we can," Jimin said with a nod. "We can fix it all Namjoon is right. We can, we've fixed everything else, right?"

"So wuh...what about me?" Taehyung asked, tongue sticking out slightly to wet his lips. "What happens to me?"

"You can stay with me and Minnie," Yoongi explained. "And Hoseok can too if he needs to. No one's getting left behind, no one's getting abandoned, yeah?"

"Kookie," Namjoon added. "Mine and Jin's apartment is always open too, if you need it. Like Yoongi said, no one's getting abandoned. We're staying together."

"I meant can you guys fix me?" Taehyung asked in a voice barely above whisper. The building fell silent for a moment and Namjoon could almost hear the sound of him taking sharp little intakes of breath. He was blinking rapidly and his fingers were pulling at the ends of his tee rather anxiously. Then Seokjin turned to look right at him, making sure to look right into his eyes.

"Of course we can Tae, but you're not broken."

"I feel broken..." Taehyung dropped his gaze to his bare feet as he said this. "I feel...like I'm in a thousand fuh-fucking pieces right now." His breath hitched and he managed to swallow the sob rather than let it escape but it was clear that he was trying to not cry.

"Then we'll pick up the pieces," Namjoon said. "Every last one."