"Expecting somebody else?"

Axl's first spoken words all night make me break out into goosebumps.

"No," I rush to speak, even though it's not easy. He towers over me, body against mine. The shadow engulfing the two of us on the wall I stare at directly ahead is his size. I get lost in it. "You're just-You. . ."

"Did I scare you?" His voice is innocent, genuinely curious.

"Well, yes. And everybody's in here-"

"Nobody's watching. They're all drunk," Axl insists quietly. His words make me turn around slightly, looking over my shoulder, and his.

Sure enough, nobody in the rest of the green room pays any attention.

"Did you have fun? Was it a good farewell show?"

"Yeah." I watch the silhouette of Axl's head as it comes to rest on my shoulder. "You did so good. You always do."

I feel his voice. It goes right to my heart. "Awh, I love you, Chasity Grace."

I beam, even though I know he can't see my huge smile very well. "I love you too, Ax."

His roaming hands begin to stray really, really far. I feel his fingertips climbing their way under my Guns N' Roses t-shirt, one of their newest designs.

"Spend the night with me."

I hardly process what he says. "Huh?" His hands. . . They're on my bare waist now.

"Spend the night with me," He repeats.

This time, I actually listen. And all over again, I feel that shock run through me, just the way it did when he saddled up behind me.

"What?"

"You heard me," Axl asserts, chuckling.

"I did, but I'm confused," I murmur. My hands now slide up alongside Axl's on my body, an attempt to stop him so I can concentrate on what he's even saying to me. "I am spending the night with you. I'm here, aren't I?"

"Bless your heart, baby." Axl really laughs now. He's grinning, I already know it just from hearing him. "I mean," He emphasizes his words, trying to be clear. "Spend the night, sleep over. At the apartment. With me."

I whip around suddenly, my face surely getting as red as the bandana wrapped around his head. "What?" The tips of my ears feel like a hot poker.

"Like, alone?" I whisper, also trying to be clear.

Axl nods, looking down at me. He's trying not to laugh.

I feel more and more embarrassed the longer I stand here, staring up at his face.

"You're so cute," Axl whispers through the laughter he can't keep in anymore. His hands reach out for me again, and I swat them away. "God, you're adorable."

I cross my arms over my chest, refusing to look at him. I focus on Izzy, who's got a line of shots in front of him.

"Is that a no?" Axl pouts, coming to stand closer to me. He blocks my view of Steve cheering Izzy on.

"I don't know," I say sheepishly. I do know. Of course I want to. Yes!

"You don't know? You'd pass up being stuck with me for an entire night?"

I meet Axl's eyes then. "I wish I could be stuck with you every single night. That's all I ever want."

Axl's only response is the look he gives me. His sly smile, pink lips pouty. It makes my heart race.

"I'll meet you at the apartment, then."

And with that, Axl walks away.

●●●

"The key is under the mat."

"When did he tell you about this little plan of his?"

Michelle cracks an even wider smile as she pats the steering wheel. "I can't tell you that!" Her voice is sing-song.

"Why not-"

"Just spend time with him, okay Chassy? It's the last night," She reminds me. "The very last one. I'll be back to get you before the boys show up for the bus, bright and early. Be ready."

I can't hide how flabbergasted this entire situation has me. "What are you gonna do, keep them out all night?"

"That's for me to worry about, not you," Michelle points a finger at me, before directing it to the side window, at the apartment building. "Now, get up there! There should be snacks in the kitchen for you while you wait."

When she winks at me, I know that that wasn't a guess.

"I can't believe you and Axl devised an entire plan to get us alone, and I had no idea-"

Michelle cuts me off with a hug. "I love you. See you tomorrow."

"I love you too," I mumble, mind racing. What is going on?

"Remember, the key under the mat."

"Okay."

I feel like I'm in a haze as I slide out of her station wagon, and walk up to the sidewalk. The sound of Michelle's window rolling down makes me stop.

"Be safe!" She leans out the car, grin devilish.

That makes me go rigid. "Oh my god!" It also makes me feel thankful that the street is empty except for us.

Something about the apartment isn't right when I walk in, and lock the door behind me.

The floors practically sparkle in the light I turn on. The couch is spotless. Nothing seems out of place. It smells like lemon, the same cleaning products my mother has at home.

When I venture into the kitchen, it's equally as immaculate. The only off part about it, is that it seems like I did the grocery shopping.

There's strawberry ice cream in the freezer, safety seal still on the lid. In the fridge, the only other thing to drink besides beer is cherry flavored Coke. What really floors me, though? The bright Cheez-It box in the pantry, right next to a couple bars of dark chocolate.

Cheez-Its in hand, I float on a cloud through the rest of the empty apartment. The doors to the boy's rooms are all shut, except for the one I'm looking for.

Stepping into Axl's room is just like being with him. That lemon cleaner is in here too, but he overpowers it. The cigarette he smoked earlier, the cologne he sprayed before he left for the concert. His handwriting on the piece of paper that rests on his perfectly made, probably just washed sheets.

"Chas,

All your favorites are in the kitchen, have something while you wait for me. (Just not the ice cream, I want to be there to eat it with you.) I hope I did an ok job cleaning up. I haven't seen you yet today as I write this, but I bet you're in a tiny little outfit. If you get cold, or uncomfortable, you can put on whatever you want. T-shirts are in the dresser at the top, sweats to the bottom.

I'll see you once I get home, hon.

-Axl- "

My breathing doesn't return to normal for a few minutes. I spend them laying across Axl's bed, his note pressed to my chest as I try to grapple the waves of emotions rolling over me.

Nobody's ever cared this much about me before. It's riveting, honestly. I struggle to really process it, just how much thought Axl put into this, without me even knowing. And right before one of the biggest days he's had yet, the night before he leaves for a sixteen month tour.

It makes me wonder how I'm going to get by without him. What am I going to do? Nobody's ever going to love me this much.

I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him-

The front door opening makes me jump up, butterflies soaring through my chest.

"Axl!" I call out to him, grinning.

"My sweet, sweet Chasity Grace! Hi-"

As much as I love hearing his voice, the second he's within my reach, I press a kiss to his lips, silencing him.

Axl laughs against my lips, his forming a smile. "Hi, honey."

"Hi," I breathe. I don't say anything else as I go right back to it, leaving my kiss on his lips.

Something feels different when Axl gets himself out of my grip to get his boots off, though. He appears to be just as dizzy as me when he stumbles a bit, trying to get the laces undone. It makes both of us laugh, spinning until I fall back onto the bed, him on top of me.

Eventually, I can't keep it in anymore.

"I love you," I say. I look up at Axl, my fingers toying with the necklaces that hang from his neck, dangling in my face. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," Axl kisses my jaw tenderly.

I don't know how much time passes by. Eventually, Axl's shirt falls to the floor, entirely by my doing. Then mine goes, too.

I don't know exactly what's gotten into me as I slide down his body. I leave kisses all over Axl. Near his shoulder. His chest. On his stomach. That faint trail of blonde hair that leads down, disappearing into the jeans he still wears.

The skin on his hip feels like velvet beneath my mouth, my kisses feverish. "I love you, Axl."

I think I forget where I am, who I am. Time doesn't exist, just him, our bodies. My declarations of love. The fire in my core could burn down entire cities now.

I reach out for Axl's hand, the one that's closest to my head. I hold it between both my own hands. So big.

My eyes shut as I leave kisses there, too. His palm, the tip of each finger. I hardly realize what I'm doing until his index finger is already in my mouth, my head moving back and forth.

"Fuck, Chas."

I pull back, a thin string of spit still tying me to him. "I love you so much, Axl." My head falls into his lap, nuzzling into him for a moment. But then I go back to it, acting on pure instinct.

Axl guides me back to his lips hastily, his tongue weaving with mine. With no one else to hear, I moan loud into his mouth. I feel his hands trail along my back, up my shoulders until they get back to my face. It makes me whine when he falls back against the headboard, out of breath.

I don't think as I begin to tug at his belt, the black leather sturdy beneath my jittery fingers. I grow frustrated when I just can't seem to get it off him, it proving difficult.

Axl doesn't help me. Instead, his hands come to rest on mine. "Not tonight."

"Why not? I want to," I hiss.

"Because," Axl says.

That makes a pang go through my chest. "You can't just say that and leave it at that."

Axl's face softens instantly, his eyelids still heavy. "We can't have sex for the first time the night before I. . . Before I leave for a year, Chas. I can't just leave you after that."

"But I love you."

The expression he makes tells me that I don't get it. And he's right, I don't. Sadness begins to pool in my stomach.

"That's why I can't."

I repeat what he says, confused. "You can't, because you love me?"

"I refuse to take your virginity and then leave you the next morning without so much as a goodbye, Chas. I want more for you than that. Something more special-"

"This is special to me right now," I counter, starting to really grow offended. "Everything you've done for me tonight has made me feel so, so special. You always make me feel so special."

"Chas-"

"No," I insist. Tears threaten to spill over now. "I really hope you get what I'm saying, Will. I love you forever. I want to be with you forever. You have my heart, completely. And now I want to give you this, and you won't have it-"

I continue to cry as he kisses me. It's not desperate, like before. He's doing it to console me, and I'll admit it, it works.

"I'm going to miss you so much. I don't know what I'm going to do," I say in between kisses.

Axl wipes at my cheeks. "I'm always gonna be with you, honey. You're stuck with me forever. You're going to be just fine."

We say nothing else as Axl runs his fingers through my hair. My tears eventually stop, that bottomless pit in my chest feeling repaired as I hug Axl's middle. I'm nearly asleep when he gets up from the bed, saying something about having a shower. That wakes me up completely. I change while the water runs down the hall, finding the t-shirt Axl mentioned in his letter, but not the sweatpants. It's too hot in here for that. I leave my bra and shorts on the floor, next to where my t-shirt landed earlier.

The scent of lavender dryer sheets fills the air as I pull back the covers on Axl's bed before laying down. I squeeze a pillow, wishing he'd come back already.

I

've retreated so far into my own head, nearly asleep again, that when Axl comes walking in, I think we're both shocked to see each other.

Me, definitely more so, though.

I can't find words to speak as I stare at Axl's body in nothing but a white towel. He's still wet. Water droplets cling to his abs, the V of his hips. The warm light coming from the nightstand only does good things for him. The entire scene makes that ache from earlier feel worse, the one from before I started crying. The one that yearns for him, that has, for months now.

He knows I'm looking. I know it.

"I. . . I-I'm sorry." It's the only thing I can think to say, just before I squeeze my eyes shut, and keep them shut.

I hear Axl laugh a little, and then what must be the sound of the towel that was hanging around his hips drop.

"You can look now."

I keep my eyes shut. I don't know if I trust him.

"I said you could look, honey."

Apprehensively, I open my eyes. Axl stands at the foot of the bed, his towel replaced by the green boxers he now wears. Then he looks at me, almost expectantly.

"What?"

"Move over," He says.

So I do. I make room for him, just before he gets in bed beside me.

The last thing I do before giving into sleep is tell Axl one last time for the night, that I love him.

●●●

A/N: This chapter was so, so hard to write. It's a compliation of four different rough drafts I wrote, each of them very different from the next. I hope you liked it, it came from the heart!

I also hope everyone is doing as well as they can right now. Hopefully this chapter, and the book as a whole has a good way of making the world melt away. Viperous has served as an escape for me for years, and I hope it's able to do the same for you all ❤

Believe it or not, we're getting close to the end of this book! Not very many chapters are left before we move onto Serene! I want to update more frequently during this time. As I write this right now, I currently have a month off of school, maybe longer. That means more time to spend with Chas and Axl!

I love you all! Make sure to leave me a ton of comments, each one is so important to me! Happy reading ❤❤❤