Author: goinginger

Genre: Fantasy

What I liked about this book:

I have such a love for fantasy outside the usual fantasy setting, and this book hit the nail on the head. I love the legends the author picked, and love even more that they're being told in a voice that still sounds fairly fable-like. There's a whimsical quality around all of it that I really enjoyed.

The bush baby made me crack up laughing. Ornery little guy. And Nalu has the potential to be a very interesting character with the place he's living in and the backstory he has--I sorta want to know more about Grandma.

What I did NOT like about this book:

The idea here is wonderful, but once again there is no story. The legends are nice in and of themselves, and I get the feel that Nalu is supposed to be some kind of chosen one, but we took far too long to have an apparent plotline.

I would cut the second chapter's plotline with Odi and Madam Koi Koi. It's just too much going on and Nalu's story is more interesting. I didn't feel any better about it the second time it came up, either, and in fact wanted to skim all of Odi's chapters. Pick one of these two characters and focus on their legends there, or better yet, just tell Nalu's story of finding a magical necklace and needing to save the world with it.

The prose was a bit telly in spots. I'd like you to write a little more immersively without losing the voice you have going. Show me stumbling across the necklace or going through the forest or learning he control creatures there. Vary your sentence structure a bit. This is a very juicy story but you're dessicating it with your word choice and sentence structure.

Overall:

This has REALLY strong potential, but it's not there yet.

Rating:

4/10. It had trouble holding my attention and really shouldn't have.