(00. violent ends)
" this is the end. bitter, sad,
yet painfully sweet. "

✨

          HER ENTIRE BODY WAS FILLED WITH ICE. Her breath felt like it was caught in her throat, and a scream was echoing in her ears. She couldn't quite tell if it was in her head or actually her own— but she could feel the agony in it. The faltering tone was like it was speaking, describing both the pain and sorrow in it.

          Astra Malfoy laid still on the ground, not even bothering to move a single muscle. Slowly as the scream finally faded away, silence overtook it. Engulfing her entirely, shielding her from the sounds inside the Great Hall. As the silence grew, she could begin to feel her muscles aching to move. But she didn't want to, she didn't want to see what was before her. What had happened to her. She knew what had happened, but she didn't want to see it. Perhaps, she hoped foolishly, that if she lay there long enough she would be given another chance. Another chance to find out who had been the vile human who had taken Fred from his family, his friends...from her. She wanted nothing more than to find them, to kill them if she was given the chance...

Fred.

       Astra's eyes shot open at the thought of him, if she was there, he could have been too. Of course there was no telling what the afterlife was. Nobody had been there and back to share with everyone. At least not that she had heard about. For all she knew, unless she refused to accept this— which could land her trapped inside the walls of the castle for years to come...the afterlife could just mean a blissful existence for eternity. No worries, no anger, just peace. All by herself. And if that was the case, she'd take a miserable existence for eternity in the stall next to Moaning Myrtle instead. Witnessing great witches and wizards enter Hogwarts and graduate and move on couldn't be that awful.

         Astra contemplated closing her eyes again, perhaps just refusing her fate right then and there would be better than what she would find there. But before she could lower her eyelids once again, she couldn't help but notice the crystal clear blue above her, the stone rafters in the Great Hall still intact. The enchanted ceiling was mimicking a perfect day, one that was perfect for Quidditch or cloud gazing for one of Trelawney's divination classes. Astras' eyes glided down from the sky until she was looking at untouched windows that hadn't been shattered, and the faculty table that was in pristine condition. She ran her hands along the stone below her, and she didn't feel a single speck of dirt or dust on her fingers. Slowly she took in the entire room, her eyes were wide with amazement as she looked at the unharmed walls, and unturned tables...everything was in place as if waiting for the oncoming students for a new year.

"H-hello?"

         The silence was so thick her voice barely cut through it. Her voice echoed in a way inside the Great Hall that it had never done before. It was as if the entire castle was empty, like she really was trapped in the castle all on her own...

"Hello?" she called out more aggressively this time, looking for any answer to come back to her. Ghost, elf, anyone really as she sat up to scan the entirely empty, pristine, quiet room.

         However the silence that her voice had barely been able to cut through was shattered by the scrapping of the Great Hall doors. That was still just as she remembered, the screeching of the hinges, the god awful sound of the door scraping against the stone floor. It was enough to set her teeth on edge.

Astra jolted up to her feet, picking up her wand that had landed beside her as she did. She wasn't sure what she expected, or who. She hoped the war was at least almost over there. On this side of it.

"Merlin, lower that thing before you kill me again."

Astra's eyes hadn't taken in the figure entering the Great Hall until they were a few steps inside and her hair had settled from spinning around. Her eyebrows rose sharply and a smile tugged on her lips. "Sirius?"

          Walking towards her was the tall figure that had been long gone. He had the same shaggy haircut that Astra had suggested he cut a dozen times. However the empty expression on his face that had been engraved in her head for years had vanished. Instead there seemed to be a twinkle in his eyes that made it look like he was happy— not locked away in the dark halls of Grimmauld Place anymore. She had never understood how he had managed to stay there for so long, she had barely been able to last a month there.

         Astra lowered her wand and for a moment she felt like she was frozen there in her spot, unsure if she should move. What if it hadn't been a killing curse? What if this was just in her head and she was simply stuck, hallucinating all of this? What if she was still on the floor of the Great Hall where she had been standing beside Ginny?

"Am I...am I really...you know..."

Sirius' smile fell and twinkle in his eye vanished, "I'm sorry, Attie." he said heavily as he reached her.

"What about Ginny?" she questioned sharply, the feeling of air being trapped in her throat returned and she felt her heart beginning to beat violently in her chest.

Sirius shrugged, "She isn't here," Sirius replied, "and my guess is this is where she'd come." he said, motioning to the room they stood in.

          Astra felt a wave of relief wash over her, and as soon as Sirius stepped within arms reach of her she swiftly pulled him into her arms for a hug. Growing up she had never heard many good things spoken of Sirius, but when she had finally met him after her sixth year at Hogwarts— he was one of the few people she felt that she could call family. She was relieved to see him and not someone as awful as other family members that could have been the ones to retrieve her.

"What are you doing here?" she questioned after a moment. "You didn't die here..."

Sirius chuckled, leaving an arm around her shoulders as he urged her to walk with him from the Great Hall.

"I don't think that's something to laugh about." she stated firmly.

"Of course you don't." he replied, a smirk on his face, "we really have to work on your humor." he added, "But that's not really how it works here." he stated, waving his other hand above them. "I'm not really sure how it really works, but my best guess is that in a situation like...like what's happening at Hogwarts...the lot of you just end up where it happened. Just on the other side."

"The lot?" she echoed.

"When Remus and Nymphadora died this is where they were...well, not here, but in the castle."

"But how did you know?" she questioned, "That's what I meant."

"Like I said, I don't know how it works." Sirius stated, "But come on, I'd bet there'll be a bunch of bloody first years coming down here soon for a meal."

         Sirius ushered her through the doors of the Great Hall, Astra couldn't stop herself from glancing back at it. She felt her brows furrow, it looked untouched still. She had expected to see it's real state. Crumbling to pieces.

"First years? They all...well I think all were evacuated."

"Like I said, I don't know how it works. But I do know that this place is still here. So someone's got to use it, even when we aren't here."

"We can leave?"

Sirius sighed heavily, "Blimey, I know you just died but you're taking this all in much slower than the others."

Astra rolled her eyes, "Who exactly do you mean? The others—" she stopped abruptly, "Fred? Is he here?"

"I don't think he'd leave yet, he was looking to see if he could find the map in Filch's office last I heard." Sirius stated, "Poor bloke, didn't have the heart to tell him that James took-"

"Thanks," Astra said quickly, shrugging Sirius' arm from her shoulders before she quickly turned to run in the direction that she knew she'd find Filch's office. "uh...I'll see you around?" she said quickly.

Sirius offered her a smile before nodding, "I'll be in the Gryffindor Common room for now."

        Astra nodded quickly before she spun on her heel and took off running. As she did she noticed that her knee didn't throb anymore, she could move it without feeling it click sharply with each movement. As she ran through the castle, she almost felt like the battle hadn't happened. Memories of Hogwarts had been destroyed when she saw it crumbling around every corner, every single body she had seen on the floors had been ingrained in her head. But here nothing had been touched, there was no crack in the walls that wasn't supposed to be there. There wasn't a single bloodied witch or wizard in sight. As she made her way through the halls, she caught herself even forgetting that she was there and not still...well, alive.

          Astra hurried to the small office, by the time she reached the door her chest was heaving as she tried to catch her breath. But she didn't hesitate at all to pull the door open. Eager to see Fred, to finally get rid of the picture of him laying on the floor of the Great Hall.

"Fred, I told you it wouldn't be in there." A girl started with her with her back to the door as she pulled a book off of the shelf behind the desk, gave it a careless shake before dropping it on the desk without even looking over her shoulder. "What good is the map here anyway? If Sirius could find us all, I'd reckon we could find anyone we wanted to anyway..." she added, her cropped brown hair falling against her shoulders as she turned. "we probably don't even have to stay here. I'll be damned if I have to stay in school for—" the girl turned completely, revealing her face which quickly became as shocked as Astra's probably was.

"Astra?"

"Crys?"

           The two girls stared at one another for a moment. Suddenly Astra found herself feeling the same heartache she had felt when she walked into the Great Hall. But it was short lived before the brunette witch hurried around the desk and quickly yanked Astra into a hug like she had on the first day of school every year on the Hogwarts express.

"Thank Merlin...I thought I'd be stuck with Fred by myself for a few decades!" she beamed over Astra's shoulder as they hugged one another. "And I couldn't even threaten to kill him if he got under my skin anymore!" she exclaimed.

Astra smiled, "Why else do you think I'm here?" she questioned, "I knew you'd be miserable."

"You didn't do this...on purpose...did you?" she asked, wincing a bit at the thought as she stepped back. Keeping ahold of Astra's arms.

Astra shook her head quickly, "No, no of course not."

"Reeves, we are not leaving this bloody office until we find it. Where else would it..."

         Astra quickly pulled her hands from Crystals and turned around, her cheeks hurt from the smile that was already plastered on her face as soon as she heard his voice from the storage closet that Filch had always shoved things he wanted to keep away from students in if he ran out of room in his desk drawers. In the doorway to the closet stood Fred, untouched by the battle. His face wasn't blank, there wasn't a drop of blood on him. He was in one piece and moving. For all intents and purposes— he was alive.

         However his face took a bit longer to go from shock and perhaps pity or sorrow at the sight of Astra than Crystals' had.

"Attie?" he questioned, his face becoming more puzzled for a split second before his usual expression of amusement took over. "I should have figured you'd go and find a way to get yourself killed. You lasted what...an hour without me?"

"Actually, it was more like three. At least." she replied before she stepped across the room and quickly threw her arms around his neck.

       Despite being dead. She didn't feel bad about it. Not like she had when she first ended up there. She didn't wish she could open her eyes and be back in the middle of a battle, back in the world where she'd have to grieve everyone she lost. At that moment— although she hoped desperately that Harry would win and Voldemort would lose, she desperately hoped that every single death eater both at Hogwarts at that moment and those not there would face a life in Azkaban or in some cases would face a dementor. She felt bad for those who were still stuck there, but she felt relieved for herself. Perhaps that was selfish. Perhaps she should have cared more about what the Weasley's would be going through after Fred died. Or what her own family would do when she found out that she was dead. But she really didn't find herself caring. Perhaps that was supposed to happen after you died— you naturally just stopped worrying about those you left behind.

         If this was her end, she was okay with it. In fact, she was happy with it. She had seen enough, experienced enough grief and pain since Voldemort's return to make her feel like she had lived a full lifetimes worth of it. She had seen and done things that most wouldn't have in their entire life. Her journey to that very spot in Filch's office in the afterlife had been everything but perfect. It had been vile in hindsight. The only good thing from it was Fred.

✨

okay, astra malfoy owns my
heart. and it physically hurt
me to write this prologue. but
at the same time it made me so
happy too. i know that it's a
bit backwards, to start the story
with the literal end of it. but for
those of you who read
roxanne weasley, you know i
don't like starting my stories at
the beginning 💀

special thanks to chxrmedmedusa-
for the temporary cover!

anyway, i hope you'll continue
and enjoy astra's journey to this.