A/N: I was aiming for a 'letter to my past/future selves' idea here, but might have been lost along the way...

[Letters to Red]

Personality: Post DMC4/Pre-DMC 5 Vergil

Dear Blue,

Hello! This is the first time I'm writing to you, so I'm really excited. Mummy told me that when I talk to someone new, I should introduce myself.

Because we can't give each other our real names, you can call me Red! I'm 5 years old, but Mummy says that I have learnt a lot and that my English is very good. I actually have a brother that's the same age as me, and we look alike. Sometimes we have lots of fun playing around and purposely wearing each other's clothes and using each other's things to confuse Dad. Mummy always knows who is who, but Dad sometimes calls me by my brother's name, and it is really funny to see him try to come up with a way to tell between us. We even take each other's names sometimes, you know. I call him my name and he calls me the opposite, and Dad gets really mixed up. It's so funny.

My brother and I are not going to kindergarten, and that's a little bit sad. I don't understand why we can't go, but Dad says it's not good for us now. What is kindergarten like, Blue? Did you ever go to kindergarten? I hear from my friends at the other side of the fence that kindergarten is where you get to meet a lot more people and make friends and play together. They all have big sisters and big brothers to teach them how to read and write, and they even take their afternoon naps together.

I don't know if I will like that, actually. I have only been doing all those with my brother. I only need him. He is my best friend, so I don't need anyone else. We are going to stay together forever, because we only need each other. If there is going to be someone else who is going to be my friend, he or she has to like my brother too, because we are always together.

My brother sometimes make me unhappy, and we sometimes fight when he takes my toys or I take his. We always get scolded together, and Mummy makes us shake hands and hug and say sorry even though we don't want to. But when there is cookies, he always shares them with me. When I get chocolate, I also always share half with him.

Do you have a brother too, Blue? How is he like? Are the two of you always together? Do you like him?

I have to go now, Blue. I have to help Mummy buy vegetables. I will write to you again soon!

Lots of love (Mummy taught me to write this),

Red

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Dear Red,

Hello, Red. It is nice to meet you. I am also glad to be able to write to you, and I am fine with you calling me Blue. It makes it easier for me; I don't have to come up with a name of my own. Did you call us by colours because you like Red and Blue?

Your mother is right. Your command of English is very good for a boy of your age. You should continue to study hard and learn more words, and you will be able to express what you want to say. You are a very smart boy, Red, so you should not put them to waste.

You and your brother sound like the two of you are having lots of fun playing pranks on your parents. I pity your father for having to tell apart between you and your brother. I expect that I may have the same problem if I ever meet you. But do try not to tease your father too much. I'm sure he didn't prepare himself to have a pair of mischievous boys like you two when the two of you were born. He loves the two of you, and you and your brother should spend whatever time you two have to spend with him and your mother.

Don't worry about kindergarten at your age now. It is nothing very worth your time at the moment. Your time will be better spent with your family now. It may sound very fun from the other children in the neighbourhood, but they have not told you that they also have to do lots of homework too, have they? The homework they have to do are very easy, but there is always a lot of them and you will have to do them before you can go out to play so I'm sure you or your brother won't like that. Don't worry about not being able to learn new things, I'm sure your parents are teaching you two many important things that you will not be able to learn in school.

Honestly, I did not go to kindergarten too. I never went to school, but what my mother and father taught me when I was young was enough to make me curious enough to study by myself. I was really good at English too, so I learnt lots of other languages using English, and then I read lots of books from all sorts of languages. You may want to try that too, Red. You will find languages interesting too.

About you being together with your brother all the time; it is fine for you to be with him all the time now when you are young, Red, but you cannot promise things for your future so easily. Things will happen in your futures, and you might be separated from your brother even though you really don't want to. The two of you will have to grow up, and no matter how alike the two of you are now, each of you are one person on your own. He might think differently from you on some things, now and in the future. Don't be afraid of being different from him when that happens, Red. Don't push him away because he is not becoming like you. If you really want to be with him as long as you can, then you must learn to accept that sometimes he will become different from you.

And also, nobody can be alone in the world –not even with only one brother. The two of you will need help outside in the world in the future. I'm sorry that I have to ruin your pleasant view of the world, but the reality outside the shelter of your parents is a scary one that you eventually will have to walk out to. It is something that everyone will face, but having more people to hold hands with and walking out to that cold world together will make it easier. Don't be like me; I walked out alone, and I found that it was cold and icy. I was so scared when I did, and I didn't dare to move forward for a long long time.

If only I had made some friends, and if only I had held tightly on to my brother's hand when I walked out into reality, then maybe I wouldn't have been frozen up like that.

Yes, Red, I have a brother too. I don't really know how he is like nowadays. I haven't talked to him in many years. I haven't seen him in many years too.

The two of us... bad things happened between us that I don't think we can make up anymore. I promised myself that I will let go of him years ago, that I won't have to need him no matter what.

But keep this between the two of us, Red: I actually think of him secretly. Sometimes, when I see a dessert store, I think of him because he used to love ice cream to bits. Sometimes I think I hear him nearby, but when I look around, I don't find him. I miss him a little bit, but we can't see each other anymore. It is dangerous for him if I go to him. I know you might not understand what I am trying to say, but please just allow a man to tell you how he feels about his brother, because I cannot show it to anyone else but you, Red.

I will write till here today. I will wait for your reply.

Best Regards (you can write this instead of saying 'lots of love'),

Blue

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Dear Blue,

Thank you for replying me! I was so happy that you actually replied me; I wasn't sure if the letter had reached you at all or not.

How did you know that my favourite colours were Red and Blue? Amazing! Can you read minds, Blue? You must be really smart if you can tell my favourite colours just by reading my letter. Please teach me how to read minds like you, Blue. I want to know what others are thinking and learn more about other people.

I don't really understand your words, Blue, but I think you are trying to give me advice and telling me to make more friends? I want to make friends too! But Dad and Mummy are not allowing my brother and I to go to kindergarten, and when we are outside, they always tell us to control ourselves and not talk about. I don't understand. Do the other children not have powers too? Can they also summon swords like how my brother and I can?

I am sad for you because you had such a painful past. Maybe because I am still too young, so I don't know how it feels like to have a painful memory. I only remember the time when my brother pushed me off the bed when we were playing and I hit my head at the corner of the table. When I woke up, Mummy was crying and Dad was scolding my brother and I was very sleepy and tired.

Did you feel like that too? What happened to you and your brother? Why didn't the two of you hold hands and walk outside together? Dad always tells me to hold my brother's hand when we go walking outside so that we won't run off without the other. He says that even if we have to get lost, we should at least get lost together because boys always have better adventures when they are together rather than alone.

Don't worry about letting go of your brother's hand, Blue. I am sure he is waiting for you to go back so that he can hold your hand again. My brother is like that too. He likes to pretend that he is high and mighty. He likes to pretend that holding his hand is something only people who he allows can do, and that he allows only me and Mummy to hold is hand. Dad cannot hold his hand because we beat Dad together once in the garden. I'm sure your brother is like mine; he is just pretending to not want to hold your hand.

Actually, I'm sure you also want to hold his hand too, don't you? I will keep your secret that you miss him for you, Blue. But if you miss him, then why don't you go to him to hold his hand? No matter what happened, if you hold your hand out to him, I'm sure he will hold it back, won't he? It is like that between my brother and I as well. Even during that time that he pushed me off the bed –he said sorry and we shook hands and then he was forgiven. We also shook hands after I secretly ate his snack and made him cry. It will definitely be okay, Blue. As long as you two shake hands, you can be brothers again.

Also, did I tell you that I had my birthday yesterday? I'm already 6! Dad taught me and my brother how to use our powers properly yesterday. Dad said that he was proud of us for being able to learn so quickly. He said that now that we have our new powers, we should help Mummy out with the housework whenever we can. But I accidentally broke my brother's cup when I tried to help Mummy take it out of the cupboard with my power today. Maybe I should train some more.

When I become powerful with it, I will protect my brother and Mummy with it. Dad doesn't need my protection because he is powerful himself. But my brother is still not very strong, so I will be strong in his stead until he can reach me. Then we will protect Mummy together.

I will stop here today, Blue. I want to sleep early so that I can wake up early and practice my powers tomorrow. I will wait for your reply!

Warmest Regards (Mummy says this sounds more... warm?),

Red

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Dear Red,

It is nice to hear from you again. I am glad to hear that you were excited at my reply.

About our names that you have given us; I am not a mind-reader. I simply implied it from your words that you like these two colours. For me, red and blue are symbolic too. I understand the reason why you have chosen to like these two colours –even if you might not understand it yourself now.

You don't have to go to kindergarten to make friends, Blue. You can make friends anywhere as long as you approach them happily and openly the same way you have done to me. But your parents are correct: you should not tell them or show them your powers. The other children don't have powers like you and your brother do, Red. They may be able to jump around quickly and run fast to chase each other, but they cannot run as fast as you nor can they jump as high as you. They also cannot summon swords like you, or stop time for a while.

I have had a painful and lonely past, Red. It was because I did all the things that I now regret, the things I wished I knew more about when I was younger. I was foolish and young and I threw away everything because I thought it was the only thing left for me to do. Now I have come to accept all that I have done, and that I am truly left with nothing I can do anymore except wait for one more day to pass and wait for another day more until something happens.

I do not wish this for you in any circumstance, Red. I wish you will never have to go through what I did. And even if you did, I wish you will never make the same choices that I did.

Your words encourage me. I also hope deeply in my heart that one day I will have the courage to go to my brother and extend my hand to him. If only one day I have the strength in my heart to stand in front of him and tell him sorry the same honest and heartfelt way that you did your brother and vice versa... I will thank you from the bottom of my heart if it truly occurs as such.

I do not wish to tell you too much about what happened to me, Red, because I want you to keep your innocence. Perhaps you might feel eager and excited to grow up, but I feel that you must take advantage of your innocence while you can. Enjoy your life while you are happier so that you have brighter memories to look back upon when you finally step out into the shadows. Adulthood is painful and lonely and cold. I wish you will have kept enough warmth by then so that you will be able to brave the cold and walk with warmth.

It is reassuring to learn that you have learnt new powers from your father. Practice them well, Red, because you will use them often in the future. They will become very important to you in the future as you grow up not only to protect your family, but also yourself. The only reason how I have survived was also due to my powers too, Red. They are a part of you, and the faster you master them, the safer you and your family will be.

But at the same time, I understand that holding more power is fun and exciting. It lets you do what you previously couldn't. It helps you do what you thought you will never be able to. But don't give up what is important for that power. Yes, the power is important to you, but always remember that inside you is something even more important. That something that beats in your chest makes you who you are, and I wish you will never forget it. Knowing how and when to use the power you own is of very high importance, and though you might not understand my words completely now, there will come a future where you stand on the edge. That is the moment that I pray you will remember my words and let them guide you to make the correct decisions.

My words are too heavy for you now, Red. I apologise.

How is your brother faring? My brother used to have such a big problem learning how to slow time. For a long period of time, he forgot all about how to do it. Is your brother having the same problem? Do help him out; brothers are always there for each other, no?

I will leave my words here for now, Red. I await your reply as you enjoy your childhood.

I truly hope that you do not become an adult soon.

Warmest Regards,

Blue

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Blue,

You knew it all along, didn't you? You knew exactly what was going to happen. You knew what would happen to my parents. I can't believe you... I can't believe I trusted you.

Why didn't you try to warn me? Why did you give me those stupid words? Why did you tell me all of those pathetic things about my brother when you could have prevented this whole chaos from the start? Do I not matter to you at all? Are you laughing from your side at an idiot who had his innocence broken just because you couldn't be bothered to warn him?

I hope you are happy, Blue. I hope that you had all the fun while writing your letters and reading mine.

It happened just exactly the way you probably knew. They stormed my house and took my father. They shot my mother. They shot her, and I was too slow. I couldn't use my powers in time, Blue. I couldn't, because you didn't tell me to focus on training my telekinesis for that one moment. I focused on every stupid little thing –on my strength and my sword skills –when all I needed was only to focus training that so that I could have stopped all of this.

My brother is gone now too. I hope you are happy. I'm exactly where you wanted me to be now, Blue. I hope you are happy. I hope you go to sleep tonight and you sleep with endless nightmares. I hope you remember exactly what happened, and when you wake up, I hope you regret every single word you wrote to me.

I cannot reach you now, Blue, but don't worry. I will make you pay. I will make every single person who did this to me pay.

Make friends with those pathetic hairless monkeys –you asked me? Wishful thinking. When every single one of their family members wake up tonight with to see blood in their sheets and dripping on the floor; they will regret every single thing they have done against me, against my mother and father.

Men and women will cry tonight, Blue. They will cry and curse one young boy who was forced to forget his childhood and grow up into a man within one night. They will remember me for life, and if they do not atone for the sins they have committed on me, then they will pay the same way their family members did.

I took a breather for a while and I'm sorry Ifumed at 

I know now why you didn't want me to grow up.

I don't know why you didn't try to warn me beforehand –I don't know any more if you didn't want to or if you couldn't do it. But it doesn't matter anymore, because it has already happened. What was done was already done.

I have grown up in ways I never wanted to, but since I'm already on this road, I can't turn back. I went to the black market today to collect my new identity card. I've already burnt the old one away, because I had to change my name and face. I have a new name now.

Want to know what I call myself now?

I'm sure you already know, Vergil.

From today, my name is Blue.

Yours,

Blue

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Dear Red,

Even if you have changed your name, to me you will always be the Red I remembered you to be.

I could not tell you the truth or your future. I could only wish that you would heed my words and listen to me. The reality is painful and the road is long. You have taken a step into a world that you won't be able to step out of for a very long time.

Someday, you and I will meet, and those words that I wrote to you may be forgotten.

But when we meet, I wish that my hand will reach out to you, and you will take them. If you told me long ago that you were sure my brother would be waiting for me to reach out my hand to him, and that he would hold it back... then I hope you will hold it.

For now, I will live my days one by one, wishing that I could have done more to save you.

Waiting forever for you,

Vergil