i pick at my face.
and chest.
and arms.
and back.
and sometimes my neck.

my arms heal slowly. i haven't even touched my arms (yet) today. or in a couple days.

but if i am stressed, or in a bathroom (alone)(with a mirror), i will get the uncontrollable urge to pick at my skin. even when my nails are short.

sorry it's blurry. my hands are shaking. this is the clearest pic i could get.

it doesn't help that i have this song stuck in my head.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

i'm not gonna spam you guys with edgy pics, though. i don't want to be cringy.

the fact that i'll have to move out one day and leave finn behind has also shaken me.

i'm hungry, yet i don't have an appetite.
i want to draw, yet i have no motivation to do so.
i wish so fucking badly to be comforted by someone, but i don't want to worry anyone.
i don't want anyone to worry over me.

ugh. i hate my mind sometimes. i'm not unwell. i'm not in pain. i'm not suicidal and i don't self harm. i feel like i'm just bitching and moaning and whining over nothing. i feel like i'm making everything up and that i'm a shitty person.
i hate it.
i hate it so much.
i hate that i fear deeply that people will think i am cringy, fake, or annoying.

i know i am valid, and that my problems are valid. it's just hard to grasp that sometimes.

i see toxic people acting depressed n shit, (from what i can tell) faking it. it shakes me up so much. i worry that i'm just like them.

i fear i'll die alone.

i

i think i'm gonna try to rp to ignore everything.

here's some art of Heather Duke.