A/N - Apologies for the long delay but I've had a lot on my plate this week. I've had a University interview and an Apprenticeship interview which I think both went well (Touch Wood.)

Along with that I've also had Online School which I'm sure a lot of you can relate is SO FUCKING AWFUL. Please someone agree with me.

However, probably gonna sound like a nerd (which I am), I should say school is important and if you are still in school don't fuck around TOO much, it'll cost you in the long run.

Anyways thanks for all the support, nearly at 50K reads which is amazing.

Alright, Rant Over but one final point.

Growing Up is a real Bitch.

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Y/N was lying in his bed as he was on the phone talking to a friend when he started laughing at the story being told to him.

"And then I said 'Wait, your name's Taserface'" Audible hysterical laughter could be heard from the other end of the call.

"What kind of stupid name is Taserface?" Y/N asked Rocket who had been telling him about the adventures that he and the other Guardians went on as they discovered more about Quill's unknown father.

"Beats me, I still don't know what's a more dumbass name Taserface or Ego?" Rocket wondered however he was subtly asking Y/N for his opinion.

"Definitely the first one.......... I'm still pissed that you guys got to blow up a planet without me." Y/N said as he felt a small ounce of jealousy build up inside of him.

Rocket sighed on the other end of communicator "I know, it's a bummer you weren't there with us.......... Yondu might not have died if you were here." There was then some chatter in the background "Oh yeah sure." Rocket said to the other person.

"Gamora's here, she wants to talk to you." Rocket informed the Merc.

"Alright then put her on, good talking to funsize." Y/N sniggered at the nickname.

Rocket growled a little "Right back at you, you annoying prick." He said before handing his communicator to the adopted daughter of Thanos.

"Hello, Y/N." She greeted quite formally.

"How's my favourite green lady?" He greeted her whilst mimicking her tone.

"I'm doing quite well, How are you doing back on Terra?"

"Eh, it's been mostly alright. Reunited with my team but it's not exactly been all sunshine, lollipops and rainbows." Y/N answered her before he started munching on a bag of Haribo Tangfastics.

"Oh, well I'm sorry to hear that."  She replied sounding genuinely apologetic.

Y/N threw a cola bottle up in the air a few feet before catching it in his mouth as he replied whilst chewing "It's alright, not sure what I expected really."

"And what of your Terran Lady?" Gamora asked Y/N referring to Natasha.

"About as well as Bill Cosby in a nursery." Y/N huffed as Venom snorted a little.

Gamora however didn't understand what Y/N was talking about however she was smart enough to make a reasonable assumption "Judging by your tone, I'm guessing that it's bad."

"Very."

"I'm sure it will get better." She tried to reassure in a comforting tone "Besides, it can't be much worse than what's happening with me and Quill."

Y/N was glad Gamora shifted the conversation away from him "Ooooooooh, Peter and Gamora sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G." He sang in a way to poke fun at her.

She chuckled a little"He seems to think there's this 'Unspoken thing' between us." She then thought about it for a few seconds "Maybe, I'm just not used to people caring about me so I'm don't what to do." She admitted as a possibility.

Y/N immediately empathised with her "I'm not in a position to tell you what to do or not to do but can I offer some advice?"

"Sure."

Y/N then offered her his advice "There's a saying on my planet............ Life moves pretty fast, if you don't stop and take a look around, you could miss it."

Gamora really understood the meaning behind what he said and took it to heart in the best possible way "T-thank you for that."

"Anytime" He said with a smile despite the fact she couldn't see it, he felt a sense of fulfillment. Y/N then looked at the time "Oh shit biscuits, I've gotta a party to get ready for so I'll have to go."

She felt a prang of pain in her chest, sad that Y/N had to go after only a few minutes when Rocket and the others talked to him for longer, before saying "Alright, please call us again soon."

"Will do, later green hottie." Y/N signed off flirtatiously.

Gamora rolled her eyes and Y/N predicted she'd done that without knowing "Bye Y/N." She farewelled to him before ending the call.

"Come on you big bitch" Venom said to Y/N "It's party time!"

--

Y/N was currently in just his boxers and socks as he was getting ready for the party that Tony was throwing, that was until he heard a knock at the door.

Despite his current attire, he went to answer the door to see Bruce standing there in a blue shirt covered by his black suit and tie.

"Looking sharp, Bruce." He complimented as he invited him into his room "Enter."

Bruce looked uncomfortable when he saw Y/N in such a little attire, but he'd seen him in less (not because he wanted to) several times before so chalked it up to nothing really in particular.

Y/N used Venom's ability to morph different clothes onto his body into the look he was going for which was a light blue shirt covered by a full dark blue suit finished off with some white Adidas Original Yung One trainers/sneakers.

"Suits and Trainers work, don't @ me." Y/N stated confidently to God knows who as be defended his self proclaimed status as a 'Fashion Icon'.

Bruce smiled as he took a seat on Y/N's bed "I've never seen you in a suit before." He said as he looked at his well dressed friend.

As Y/N readjusted his suit jacket "I keep how good I look, very well hidden. Beer?" He said as Bruce refused the alcohol before Y/N took a seat on the chair after grabbing a bottle of beer "So what's up? I assume you're not here for me to do your make-up and paint your nails."

Bruce let a dry laugh escape "No,no. I've come here for some man to man advice."

Y/N had a look of intrigue and surprise on his face as he leaned his arm on the table to give Bruce his full attention "Well I am a man , depends on whose reading, despite my child like tendancies SO fire away." He said as he did a pistol gesture in Bruce's direction.

Bruce shuffled to the corner of the bed so his body was fully facing Y/N "Well...... you've got a lot of experience with women."

"Oh you've got woman trouble, please indulge me." Y/N invited Bruce to share more with him as he took a swig from his beer bottle.

He sighed before looking at Y/N and flat out saying it "I think Natasha has got a crush on me." Y/N's eyes bulged out of his skull and he turned his head to the side to do a spit take.

He started coughing and spluttering as Bruce asked "You ok?"

"Yeah fine, just a little surprised that's all." He said as he wiped his face with his sleeve "So what makes you think that?"

Bruce looked away, a little embarrassed "I don't know." He stuttered as he scratched the back of his neck in evident nervousness "She's been really helpful in helping me with the other 'guy' and we've gotten.... Closer, she's a bit more flirty I think."

A thought did spring to Y/N's mind about Bruce "Hang on though, what happened to that Betty Ross woman?"

"The MCU might have forgotten about her but I sure as shit didn't."  Y/N thought to himself "She was fuckin' Hot!"

"We split up, it was for the best really." Bruce reassured Y/N and himself.

Y/N hummed before asking the question that had burned in his head "Do you like her?"

Bruce's brain almost sizzled and he was sure if you listened closely you could hear the static "I'm mean she's nice, understanding......... O-o-obviously v-very beautiful." He stuttered, his words were almost tripping over invisible obstacles "She's also misunderstood, sort of like you in a way."

Y/N couldn't help but agree with what Bruce was saying as a teasing smile came onto his face with his natural ability for poking fun at people also coming out "Green Day, are you saying you have a crush on me?"

"No! No! God No!" Bruce yelled out in partial horror "Not you."

"So you do like her?" He said before rolling his eyes at his own behaviour "I feel like a high school girl at a slumber party."

Bruce didn't acknowledge Y/N's comment but only his question and answered "Yeah, I guess I do."

It certainly wasn't what Y/N wanted to hear and he almost had a heart attack at Banner's answer before the brilliant scientist requested "Do you think you can help me?"

"Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit" Venom realised, as he saw that Y/N had a decision to make, his and Y/N's minds casting back to what the Silver Surfer Dude in space had told them about 'Making Important decisions' and whether this was one of them.

Y/N had about a million thoughts blast in his mind within a matter of seconds and almost all of these thoughts were telling him to not help or give him the wrong advice on purpose.

HOWEVER

Y/N was a lot of bad things but a bad friend. He absolutely was not.

Of course, Bruce was the person he'd been friends with longer than anyone else on the team and if not him to make Natasha happy, Bruce was as good a fit as anyone.

"Alright, I'll help you." He replied convincingly, an outsider would think nothing was wrong  "But I'm not a miracle worker." He said slapping him on the shoulder, startling Bruce.

"Who said you didn't care."

--

Y/N walked down the stairs, fashionably late, to see the party was in full swing with people dancing, chatting and drinking. Y/N adjusted his suit, his pockets a little fuller than he'd like but thankfully not that noticeable.

He smirked as he walked down the steps to join the party as he started speaking  "Hey Upper East Siders, word on the street is that there's a man of legendary status back in town. Let's see what he brings with him." Y/N monologued in a pitched feminine voice.

"XOXO Gossip Girl."

Y/N looked around for someone to strike up a conversation with which was when he noticed Tony, Thor, Maria and Rhodey all at the bar with drinks in their hands.

He strolled over to them "What's up dickheads." He greeted before saying to the person working the bar "A fucking big bottle of Tequila amigo." He requested to them as they nodded in reply.

"Rhodey, I ain't seen you in a while." Y/N said as he and Rhodey engaged in a friendly bro handshake "How's being 'War Machine' treating you, gotta say big fan of the violent name much better than Iron Man."

Tony scoffed as he punched Y/N's arm "Hey! It's memorable."

"It's also as basic as a plain Digestive biscuit." Y/N fired back before returning his attention to Rhodey "God, some people." He said whilst shaking his head.

"Yeah, I know." Rhodey replied as he laughed at Tony's expense "Let me tell you guys one of my War Machine stories." He said as he fully prepared to tell them in his mind a great story.

After a few minutes of listening to James' story he proceeded to finish it "Well, you know, the suit can take the weight, right? So I take the tank, fly it right up to the General's palace, drop it at his feet, I'm like, 'Boom! You looking for this?'" He finished the story looking immensely proud of himself.

Y/N started laughing "'BOOM! You looking for this!?' That's a good one!" He complimented before taking a swig from his bottle of tequila whilst Tony and Thor continued to look at the man behind War Machine blankly, Rhodey sensing their hesitation looked at them and repeated his punchline.

"'Boom! Are you looking...' Why do I even talk to you guys? Everywhere else that story kills........ At least Y/N appreciates it, maybe I should hang out with him more often." Rhodey defended earning a snigger from Maria making Rhodes glare at her "What?"

"Be careful what you wish for." Maria warned Rhodes as the pair watched Y/N down the three quarters of Tequila left in his bottle in one go.

"Noted." He whispered back to the female ex-S.H.I.E.L.D agent.

Y/N slammed the bottle down back on the bar, almost shattering the glass on impact "Oh come on Hill, I'm not that bad." Y/N tried to defend to the woman.

"Let's agree to disagree." She scoffed before taking a sip from her glass.

"Admit it Maria, you get wet." Y/N said with a smirk as she looked at him, utterly horrified whilst the Tony, Thor and Rhodey did small spit takes in their drinks "With perspiration when your standing this close to moi." Y/N saved himself from possibly earning a slap.

Maria glares at Y/N with a look that if Y/N didn't have a healing factor would leave him dead where he stood, she then dragged Rhodes away with her deciding to mingle with other guests.

Thor laughed heartily "You truly have a way with the womenfolk, Y/N." He commented.

Y/N them raised his eyebrows with a small thought popping up in his mind "Speaking of women, where's Jane and Pepper? We need a few more Tens at this party." He cockily teased making Tony and Thor's faces drop "Seems this party's full of fives and under." Y/N commented on the guests of the party.

Both Avengers were suddenly very glad that their girlfriends weren't at the party "They're busy doing other shit tonight." Tony sadly yet sarcastically broke to Y/N.

Y/N sighed in discontent "Shame...... There's a lot of untapped sexual chemistry between me and your ladies." He explained to them before giving them a sly wink "Cheerio lads."

Thor whispered in Tony's ear "Y/N wouldn't attempt to retrieve our maidens from our grasps would he Stark?"

Tony had an unfortunate look of worry on his face as he said back to the God of Thunder "Have you met Y/N? The man will flirt with anyone and everyone, he's worse than old school me."

--

Steve and Sam were seen walking up some stairs to the higher level of the complex that party was being held in "Sounds like a hell of a fight, sorry I missed it." Sam commented on the Avengers time in Sokovia.

"If I had known it was going to be a firefight I absolutely would have called you." Steve commented trying to let his close friend down easily.

Wilson chuckled as he and Rogers looked out over the party "No, I'm not actually sorry. I'm just trying to sound tough. I'm very happy chasing cold leads on our missing persons case. Avenging is your world. Your world is crazy."

"Not as crazy as me." Someone stated as both Steve and Sam were slapped harshly on their shoulders making them jump out of their skins.

The pair turned around to see Y/N laughing as he started drinking from his vodka bottle "Ahhh Classic." He voiced in reference to their reactions.

Wilson gave Y/N a fist bump "L/N, have you been a good boy?" He asked leniently, already knowing what the answer would be.

"You know me, I need to ensure that my special throne in hell still has my name on it." Y/N answered the man who got a few shivers when he heard it.

Y/N looked out over the indoor balcony with the two guys as they saw the fun that the partygoers were having "There's some old fuckers in here and I don't mean just me and you Cap." Y/N commented.

"Yeah, no kidding. Clearly the winters aren't cold enough on Earth." Venom commented as Y/N stifled a laughter.

Steve slapped Y/N on the back of his head "Language."

Sam chuckled at Steve's treatment of Y/N "I think your dad is annoyed with you." He joked.

Y/N scoffed at Sam's comment "Trust me if Steve was my father, he wouldn't slap me in the back of the head but would smash a bottle on my skull."

--

About an hour later, Bruce was looking around frantically for Y/N as he felt it was time for him to talk to Natasha and wanted his advice before he did.

He finally found Y/N in the corner of the room along with a rich older gentleman that  he had spoken to earlier in the night with Y/N discreetly handing something small to him from his jacket pocket as the gentleman handed him a wad of cash before walking away.

Bruce approached Y/N who gave him an upwards head nod "Wassup Anger issues." He greeted as he pocketed the cash in his jacket.

"Please tell me you're not doing what I think you're doing." Bruce solemnly questioned his long time friend.

"That depends on what you think I'm doing." Y/N replied, not a flicker of remorse or guilt on his face.

Bruce leaned closer towards Y/N's ear and whispered "Dealing drugs."

"Oh." Y/N said with a tiny mischevious smile on his face "Well then I am doing what you think I'm doing........... Besides I'm just doing my bit for the community."

"How!?" Bruce quietly yet furiously questioned him.

"A - I'm giving people a pick me up as the party's dying down a bit and B - I'm going to use said money to buy shit that I will inevitably save people's lives with. It's a win-win situation." Y/N explained to the scientist who in all fairness to him had other things on his mind than Y/N's illegal activities.

Bruce cupped his hand over his eyes and let out a pained sigh "Just don't let anyone catch you." He warned him.

Y/N and Venom laughed at Bruce's attempt to be threatening but accepted "Yes sir, but it's nice to know that Drug Dealing is apparently where the line in the sand is." Y/N joked.

Bruce did a large eye roll "I'm going to go and talk to Natasha." He told Y/N.

Y/N shrugged his shoulders "Why are you talking to me then, unless you're blind like Matt Murdock, I'm not Kim Possible."

Bruce asked Y/N "I need some advice on what to do and say." He seemed quite panicked to say the least.

Y/N sighed and wrapped his arm around his shorter Avenger friend "Walk with me." Y/N advised, dragging Bruce along with him as they ventured off to search for a particular redheaded woman.

A few minutes later, the pair saw Natasha at the bar, pouring herself a drink and Y/N stopped the pair in their tracks out of sight from the woman.

Y/N saw Natasha and was mesmerised 'Damn, she looks good.' He then corrected himself in his own head 'Who am I kidding, she always looks fuckin' good.'

"There she is." Bruce said, he was staring and was drooling slightly.

Y/N swatted him lightly in the jaw with his knuckles "Stop staring, it's creppy and you're giving off a kind of a sex killer vibe that you really don't need right now."

"That's not doing much for my confidence." Bruce stated giving Y/N a 'seriously' look, Y/N gave Bruce a silent apology as Bruce asked "So what do you say to a lovely woman?" Bruce glanced at his longtime friend.

"I'll be honest Bruce normally I just say Spread 'em, I'll be there in half an hour." Y/N answered him honestly.

"Or what do your underpants and cocaine have in common? I'd love to sniff 'em both."

"Yeah or that."

"I don't think that's going to work for me." Bruce admitted.

Y/N then decided to lay out the blueprints to success for Bruce, no matter how much he didn't want to "Alright, Step 1 - compliment her on how nice she looks, Step 2 - attempt to crack a few jokes here and there to give it the light and breezy feel, finally Step 3 - ask her to dance."

"Dance!?" Bruce seemed horrified by the thought "I don't know how to dance!"

"Who said you need to know how to dance, just out your hands on her waist NOT her ass, let her put her arms around your neck or shoulders then just move in beat with the music. Any fucker could do it." Y/N explained trying to calm Bruce's nerves.

Bruce did seem calmer then took a few seconds to try and compose himself before going over. Once he had hyped himself up, he tried to go but was stopped by Y/N grabbing his wrist.

"What?" He asked Y/N.

Y/N once again wrapped his arm around Bruce "Remember my green friend, that woman." He said whilst pointing to Natasha "Is like a rose."

Bruce looked confused at Y/N's declaration "A rose?"

"Yeah, she's beautiful, red BUT has a thorny exterior so when you try to get her be careful of how you go about it." Y/N offered as a final piece of advice with a smile before patting reassuringly a few times on Bruce's back.

"Huh, thanks Y/N" Bruce said seemingly understanding Y/N's analogy "Wish me luck."

"Bad luck." Y/N joked despite there being a miniscule amount of truth behind it.

"Thanks." Bruce sarcastically said before heading off to the redhead. Y/N watched him go wanting to see how this would turn out before a random old geezer came up to him.

"Excuse Me, I heard that you have........ You know 'stuff'." The man said with wink hoping that Y/N would understand what he meant.

"Damn, business is good tonight." Venom commented as Y/N smiled knowing exactly what the man meant.

"Sure." Y/N said as he subtly opened up his blazer to reveal the pockets were stuffed with several variations of drugs "Pick your poison."

Meanwhile Bruce went over to go and see Nat, he would be lying if he said that he wasn't a little nervous even more so than usual. He finally got to the bar and Natasha flashed him a smile.

"Y-you look really nice tonight Natasha." Bruce attempted to compliment however mentally scolded himself for not coming up with something better than that.

"Thank you Bruce, you're not looking too bad yourself." She reciprocated his compliment making Bruce blush ever so slightly.

He then tried to follow Y/N's advice by joking a little "So what's a nice girl like you working in a dump like this?"

"Fella done me wrong." She answered playing along as she handed him a martini.

"You've got lousy taste in men, kid." Bruce said as he took a sip from the martini glass, impressed by the flavour.

"He's not so bad." Natasha admitted as she made herself a drink, she then sighed "He's got a mouth on him and does a whole lot of bad things, but deep down he's got a heart of gold."

Bruce seemed a little confused as he took another sip from his drink 'This doesn't sound like me.' He thought to himself.

"Truth is, he's not like anyone I've ever known. He's weird, whimsical and all of the above yet he's the only man I've ever known that can make me laugh....... and cry." She admitted to Bruce who listened intently to every word she was saying.

Natasha continued explaining to Bruce "All of my friends are fighters......... but here comes this guy who gets in more fights than anyone else because he knows he'll always come out of the other side of it......... and without it he doesn't know who he is." She continued as she finally finished making her drink. 

"This guy certainly sounds like something." Bruce said looking at Natasha who had an unusual sense of timidness about her.

"Do you think I should fight this or run with it?" She asked Bruce genuinely.

Bruce was somewhat stumped for an answer so instead stammered out "Well what did this guy do that was so bad to you?"

Natasha sighed as she finished her drink "He broke my heart."

Bruce tried to piece together who this person was but couldn't quite put together who he thought it could be but his own emotions were blocking his train of thought, he didn't have time to think though as Natasha grabbed him by the hand.

Bruce got knots in his stomach as Natasha said with a smile, throwing everything she had just said out of the window "Come on, we're going to dance."

'Step 3 - ask her to dance.' Bruce thought to himself as he was being dragged by Natasha onto the dance floor.

Bruce glanced over to where Y/N was who gave him a nod of approval along with a thumbs up.

Y/N looked on as he saw Bruce put his plan into action and start dancing together with Romanoff, messing up here and there but not doing too badly.

"It's nice isn't it?"

Y/N looked next to him to see Steve standing a few feet away also looking at Bruce and Natasha with a big smile on his face, evidently happy for them as any good friend would be.

"They're a good fit for each other don't you think?" Steve asked Y/N for his opinion.

"Sure." Y/N said with enough conviction to convince Captain America despite his underlying thoughts.

--

Y/N hung around with Steve and Thor for a short while trying to put the previous events out of his mind at least for the time being as Y/N decided to drink even more alongside some World War Two veterans.

"Hey, pass me some of that." One of the vets said to Thor who held in his hand a small bottle of liquor from his home.

"Oh, no, no, no. See this, this was aged for a thousand years, in the barrels built from the wreck of Brunhilde's fleet, it's not meant for mortal men." Thor explained to the old timing war men.

"Good thing I'm immortal then." Y/N joked with the vets who laughed thinking Y/N was just having a laugh before Thor poured himself, Steve and Y/N a drink each.

"Neither was Omaha beach blondie, stop trying to scare us." One of the war men confidently stated feeling he could hold his alcohol.

Y/N harshly hit Thor in the shoulder making the God wince in pain "Give Stan Lee a fucking drink would you!?"

Thor shrugged seeing how keen the man was for it "Alright." He said before pouring some of the Asgardian booze into the man's cup.

A few minutes later whilst everyone was conversing Y/N was tasked with dragging a now very drunk Stan Lee out of the party area and to get him in a cab home.

"Excelsior." He muttered drunkenly as he and Y/N entered an elevator to go down to the ground floor.

Whilst listening to the boring ass elevator music, the man turned to Y/N and said "Hey, don't give up on her......... Either of you." He advised Y/N who seemed a little surprised at what he was just told.

"Who the hell is this guy? Does he know about me?"

Almost as if he could hear Venom, the silver haired man whispered "I know everything that goes on around here."

Y/N sighed with a smile on his face "I know you do Stan, I know."

After Y/N had kindly put the man in a cab to go home, Y/N got back in his elevator for return to his room to put all the cash he had received from his various 'business dealings'.

He wasn't really focused as he was talking to Venom however the Symbiote then yelled out of absolutely nowhere "SHIT!!!"

"What?" Y/N asked his Symbiote however he saw exactly why the Klyntar native reacted like he did as Y/N exclaimed "Holy Fuck nuggets."

Natasha and Bruce were kissing in the hallway.

The pair were startled by Y/N's sudden appearance with the pair quickly pulling apart. Natasha who couldn't think of a worse person to catch them tried to explain "Y/N, it's not... It's not what it looks...."

Y/N then hushed her "It's alright." He assured, however it wasn't "I didn't see anything."

Y/N walked past, giving Bruce a few friendly taps on the back "Good job, knew it would work." He said before heading back to his room to drop off his money.

Natasha looked back at Bruce "Knew what would work?" She asked the scientist.

Bruce felt a little embarrassed "Oh um, I might have asked Y/N for some advice on how to talk to you." He softly confessed to Natasha.

The Black Widow didn't quite know what to say "And he gave it to you?" She questioned, slightly in disbelief.

"Yeah he was more than willing, gave some very helpful advice actually." He replied before suggesting "Perhaps we should go back to the party."

Natasha let out a small cough, still recovering after being caught by her former lover kissing another man "Yeah, that's a good idea."

As she and Bruce walked back to the party with a thought in Natasha's mind 'Y/N, you continue to surprise me."

--

A few hours later, the only people left at the party were The Avengers, Rhodey, Wilson, Agent Hill and Doctor Cho who were all drinking and chatting amongst each other with Y/N sitting in between Steve and Thor.

"Whatever man it's a trick." Clint said as he looked at Mjolnir on the table as he spun a drumstick between his fingers.

"Oh no, it's much more than that." Thor stated.

"Yeah, god Clint don't read?" Y/N poked fun at Clint.

"Have you ever read a book? Mr Pop Culture." Clint argued back.

Y/N downed a bottle of beer before laughing "Clearly someone forgot that I grew up in an era before TV."

"Ha, you old bastard." Tony attempted to make fun of Y/N's ripe old age.

"The same old bastard that still looks younger than anyone else here. So winner, winner chicken dinner." Y/N confidently stated earning a huff of disapproval from Tony.

Y/N then turned to Thor "You gotta be worthy or some stupid shit like that to lift that oversized piece of D.I.Y equipment."

"Yes, of course." Thor stated, impressed that Y/N had a slight knowledge of Mjolnir's history and legend.

"'Whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power!' Whatever man! It's a trick." Barton attempted to brush off as if it was nothing.

"Well, please be my guest." Thor challenged Clint and everyone else to try which stopped everyone's private conversations that they were having and focused instead on Mjolnir.

"Hot damn! This outta be entertaining."

"Really?" Clint asked to which Thor nodded. The archer got up to encouragement from almost everyone.

"You know as you get older, getting it up can be a real problem." Y/N quipped earning light chuckles from the surrounding group.

"Ha, ha" Clint said to Y/N emotionlessly before saying to Thor "You know I've seen this before right." He said as he gripped the handle of the Asgardian hammer with one hand as he strained whilst attempting to lift it.

"I still don't know how you do it." He laughed as he conceded that he couldn't do it.

"Smell the silent judgement." Stark jokes with his eyes glued on Mjolnir.

Clint points to the hammer before heading back to his seat "Please Stark by all means."

Stark got up, having a bit of a swagger as he approached Thor's weapon with everyone letting out their thoughts as he went up.

"Here we go again."

"Okay."

"Goddamn."

"Maybe if you think about Pepper it'll help you get it up." Y/N quipped forcing Tony to glare at him.

The billionaire put his hand through the strap and places his hand on the handle "When I pick this up, I'm going to smack you across the head with it." Tony playfully threatened Y/N.

"And when that doesn't happen I'm going to be laughing like Penny-wise the clown." Y/N stated as he leaned back in his seat to enjoy the show.

Tony pulled as hard as he could but failed to move it even a millimetre before letting go "Hold on a sec." He said, leaving the room to go and get something.

Y/N then said to everyone "A thousand dollars says he's going to get his suit."

Tony returned with part of his Iron Man armour covering his arm from his elbow downwards as he gripped back onto the hammer using all of his technological might to pick it up.

Rhodey got some of his War Machine armour on in order to try and pull the hammer up along with Tony.

"Are you even pulling?"

"Are you on my team?"

"Just represent, pull!" Rhodey orders and after a short while both Tony and James give up.

Banner then stepped up to the plate as he gave it everything he had to try and get it up off of the table however he failed as well but when he let go of the hammer he began dramatically roaring which was very out of character for him as everyone eyed him up strangely.

"Tragic." Venom commented.

Everyone decided to try and test their luck, Doctor Cho tried but have up after a few seconds as did Hill. Falcon gave it a go and almost fell over he was trying so hard. However there was an element of hope when Steve went up as when tried, Y/N swore that he saw the hammer move just a little as it made a squeak on the table.

Thor obviously saw the movement as well as huge worry was plastered on his face however when Steve gave up, there was evident relief brushed across his features.

Bruce then said "Widow?" As he invited Natasha to try however she politely rejected.

"That's not a question I need answering." She voiced before taking a swig from her beer.

Everyone's eyes then turned to Y/N, who had yet to have a go, as he finished a bottle of Jack Daniels before saying "If anyone wants me to do the knife trick from Aliens, I'm so down."

"Go on Y/N, you try and lift the hammer." Steve challenged his former roommate.

"Guaranteed you won't be able to do it." Wilson added on.

Y/N scoffed a few times at the challenge and comments "Pfft, ME lifting that hammer is like Muhammad Ali throwing a punch or Tiger Woods picking up a golf club."

"Ooooooh confidence, I like it." Tony egged on "But seriously Y/N, if none of us could lift it what makes you think that you could."

Y/N stood up and prepped himself "Easy because you're all good guys. Me, I'm the black sheep of the group so naturally I'm the odd one out WHICH translates to me lifting that motherfucker." He said pointing to Mjolnir.

Y/N went to pick up Mjolnir with everyone's eyes fixated on Y/N but the mouthy Mercenary pulled out last second "Just a show of hands who actually thinks I'm gonna do it."

No one put their hand up "Wow, really feeling the faith here guys."

"I do."

Everyone turned to see Natasha with her hand partially in the air "I think you'll be able to do it." She confidently believed in Y/N.

"Seriously Natasha, him." Clint said "The guy who commits murder."

"Assassinations."

"Torture."

"Arson."

"Robbery."

"Maiming."

"Cannibalism."

Almost everyone named a crime that Y/N had commited or probably commited in his time as Venom said to Y/N "We've got a serious rap sheet, haven't we?"

"That we do." Y/N agreed with Venom.

"Alright that's enough." Natasha said bringing proceedings to a halt "You don't see him picking out all of your flaws." She defended Y/N much to everyone's surprise, she then turned to Y/N with a small smile on his face "Continue."

Y/N smirked pridefully "I'm just saying when I lift this, you are all naming your children after me." He said before looking at Thor "Worried about the future king of Asgard?"

Thor laughed heartily "Y/N, I mean this with no offense whatsoever but........... You don't exactly scream 'Worthy'."

Y/N wanted to prove everyone wrong there and then however was halted by a high pitched noise going off over the sound system making everyone cover their ears.

Venom surprisingly seemed unaffected by the high frequency noise which he and Y/N both found to be strange.

"Worthy." A voice called out before heavy footsteps were heard as a deformed looking Iron Legion suit came out.

"How could you be worthy......... You're all killers." The metallic body looked around the room at the occupants.

"Stark" Cap called out as Tony tried to fix the faulty equipment.

"I'm sorry I was asleep, or I was a dream."

"Reboot, Legionnaire OS, we got a buggy suit." Tony ordered quietly as he was tapping on his device.

"There was a terrible noise...and I was tangled in... in...strings. I had to kill the other guy. He was a good guy."

Y/N put his hand up in the air "Excuse me, Mr Fucked up looking robot with a Stephen Hawking voice but you called us killers........ Then said you killed someone, doesn't that make you kinda hypocritical."

The robotic voice started laughing"YOU Venompool, are the worst killer of them all."

Y/N tutted "Oh well feel free to put that on my next birthday card, Short Circuit." He quipped as Stark continued fiddling with his control pad trying to fix it.

"Who sent you?" Thor asked

The Iron Legion suit then begins playing a recording of Tony "I see a suit of armor around the world".

Bruce has a horrified look on his face as he looks at both Y/N and Tony "Ultron!"

"In the flesh. Or, no, not yet. Not this...chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on a mission."

"What mission?" Natasha asks.

"Peace in our time."  Suddenly the Iron Legion bots break smash through the walls of the building and start to go to attack the Avengers and co.

One of the Iron Legion bots sends a blast into Rhodes' chest sending him through glass window, Steve kicks up a table to use as a temporary shield to defend himself whilst Thor swats one of them away with Mjolnir.

Tony and Banner dive to one side together whilst Maria starts firing at the robots with her pistol that she had on her. Y/N on the other hand was pulled by Natasha over the bar.

Natasha went straight over however Y/N was still on the counter top but was then pulled down to the ground by his back where he landed with his head straight between Natasha's breasts.

Y/N laid there for a second a little disorientated before lifting his head up "Thanks for the soft landing." He joked with her as she grabbed a pistol from under the bar.

"It's nowhere you haven't been before." She said as she fired back as Y/N morphed into his Venompool suit with his swords and staff equipped with him.

Y/N went out to go and kick ass but was stopped by Natasha "What are you doing!?" She whisper yelled at him.

He broke free of her grasp "What I do best, besides........ Don't you have a boyfriend you should be worrying about." He harshly reminded before hoping over the counter to apprehend the situation.

One of the Iron Legion bots grabbed the sceptre and flew off with it as Venom quipped "We're just a magnet for trouble."

"More fun that way." Y/N joked back with his Symbiote.

Venompool cleaned up the remaining bots as they latched onto the airborne suits using Venom's tendrils before slicing up the metal easily with Y/N's vibranium swords.

He then used the scrap metal of the suit he destroyed to forcefully throw at the other two suits which caused a mini explosion within the Avengers tower.

Y/N landed back on the floor, taking his mask off as he looked over at his relatively unharmed friends "Everybody all good?" He asked.

The main instigator of the brawl then looks around at the destruction of his fellow Iron Legion bots "That was dramatic."

The Avengers and their friends all look forward towards the leader of this little posse as he continues to monologue "I'm sorry, I know you mean well. You just didn't think it through. You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to...evolve?"

"Blah, blah, blah, blah. Stupid villain monologue bullshit." Y/N comments as he mocks the robot.

Ultron then picks up a broken Iron Legion suit "These puppets? There's only one path to peace: The Avengers' extinction."

Y/N then finally silences him by extending two tendrils by his shoulders and catapults himself into the metal suit, eradicating it on impact "Strike!" He exclaims.

As Y/N gets to his feet, he sees there are several unimpressed looking faces around particular in the direction of one Tony Stark.

"Not exactly the party of the year is it?"

Y/N had to agree with Venom "Nope, but it sure was eventful."

--

A/N - (Question of The Day)

OUT OF ALL THE CHARACTERS VENOMPOOL HAS ENCOUNTERED SO FAR, WHO ARE THE THREE HE HAS THE BEST INTERACTIONS WITH AND WHY?