I DON'T REMEMBER much how things between me and Theron got so comfortable. Ang natatandaan ko lang, mahilig siyang magtanong at mahilig naman akong sumagot sa mga nagtatanong sa akin. Iyon ay kung hindi tungkol sa personal kong buhay. But before things went onto that, our talk was unidirectional. At first. Magtatanong siya, magtataka ako kung ako ba ang tinatanong niya. Hanggang sa kalaunan, I responded.

That was how we started to talk.

Minsan, nang mapili kaming dalawa bilang magpartner sa isang interschool debate, we were asking each other's thoughts about certain topics, we decided to argue together, rebut each other to assess which point we are good at and on which parts we could help each other improve.

The argument was about Human AI.

Let it be resolved, do future technological advancements threaten to diminish the demand for human labor in the world?

He was on the negative side and I was on the positive side.

Before the debate even started, he leaned in his chair, gazed at me. And before I was able to state my opening statement. . . he gave me a smirk.

Unang beses na blanko ang isip ko sa gitna ng isang debate.

Unti-unting nanlabo sa isipan ko ang naalala. Deep and heavy breaths never left my chest even when minutes passed by. Nakahiga ako sa kama. Nakatitig sa dingding sa harapan. Nanginginig ang balikat at nanlalamig ang mga kamay.

I could hear Theron's voice from the speakers of my phone. Napatitig ako sa cellphone na kanina ay halos idiniin ko na sa tenga makarinig lang ng kakilalang nagsasalita at makahingi ng tulong.

"What's happening there? Are you alone?"

It's as if I could literally see his face in front of me as he started talking on the other line---calling my name, asking what's wrong.

"I couldn't sleep. . ." I repeated, my mind was now blank. My breathing abnormal.

Bumanayad ang paghinga ni Theron sa kabilang linya. Kagaya nang madalas kong marinig kapag tinatawagan ko siya, may kaluslos ulit bago siya nagtanong. "Why is that?"

Kumurap-kurap ako para makapagfocus ang mga mata sa harapan. Nothing's in there. Not even a single soul. I'm alone in my room.

"I think I. . ." Pinutol ko ang sariling sasabihin. "I saw someone."

"Someone?"

Napalunok ako. Lumandas na naman ang luha sa gilid ng mga mata ko.

"Ano bang madalas mong gawin 'pag hindi ka makatulog?" I asked instead.

I don't know why but it seems like I am the very person who keeps doubting what I see and what I think is right. What if. . . ako lang pala ang nakakakita ng gano'n? What if ako lang ang nag-iisip na nakikita ko ang babae? Paano kong nasa isip ko lang lahat?

"I don't know, Dali. Nakakatulog agad ako pagkauwi sa bahay."

"Minsan hindi ka na nagdi-dinner?"

"That's it."

Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko. No words escaped my lips. Hinayaan kong balutin kami ng katahimikan ni Theron nang ilang minuto.

I tried recalling the moment earlier, but nothing consoled me. Alam kong imposible ang nakita ko, alam kong mahirap iyong ipaliwanag kung sakali.

The ghost of the dead girl followed me to my house. Hunting me—as if she wanted to be near me.

Sa mga pelikula na napanood ko, nagpapakita sila kung kailangan nila ng tulong.

But how could I help anyway?

But this doesn't happen in real life! Too impossible! Too irrational! Maybe I'm just too desperate to find reasons not to accuse my mind of thinking about everything even if it doesn't concern me.

Napahawak ako sa dibdib. Pinahiran ang luha sa pisngi gamit ang libreng kamay.

"Bakit parang ayaw mapagod ng utak ko kakaisip ng kung anu-ano?" I said, frustration lingered in my voice.

Kumawala ang mahina kong hikbi.