May 1998

"Don't go, come on just stay." I finally got out of his grasp and stood up off the bed. 

"I have to go," I said. 

"No." He sat up and grabbed me by my waist and pulled me back into bed. 

"I stayed home with you yesterday, and it's just for today you should be okay by tomorrow." 

"Stay, please." 

"Ugh, just for a little but I have to go for my second class because I have partner work." I kicked off my shoes and got back in bed with my uniform on. 

"With who?" 

"Some Hufflepuff, I forgot his name."

"Is he good-looking?"

"It wouldn't matter, I'm not interested."

"Is he interested in you?"

"I've only met him once Mat."

"So."

"Oh, just shut it about my partner." We were facing each other and I put the back of my hand to his forehead. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, just a cough."

"Then you can go to class."

"No."

"Oh, so then you're okay by yourself?"

"No, I said stay." He cuddled me into his bare chest. "I'm so tired."

"That's because you're sick you git." I moved so we were face to face and I caressed his cheek. "Sleep." I was playing with his hair now to get him to rest. His eyes were closed and he had a smirk plastered on his face. 

He put an arm over my waist and pulled me towards him and he rested his head on my stomach as he clutched me tightly. I was trying not to breath heavily so that my stomach wouldn't raise. He opened his eyes slightly and looked up at me.

"Breath properly." He closed his eyes again and I did as he said and he smiled. I drew pictures on his back and I saw him get goosebumps on his arms. He is such a baby when he's sick.

<><><><><><><>

I tried to keep to myself in class, but I couldn't help listen. Michael was sitting behind me and I couldn't focus on my work because of what they were talking about.

"So who are to taking to the ball next Friday?"

"Not sure. I don't even want to go."

"Oh mate, you have to. I'll find you someone."

"I'll go but I don't want a date."

"You have to have a date, who are you going to dance with?"

"I don't want to dance with anyone el- anyone." I felt his eyes at the back of my head and I wanted to faint.

"Oh dear, your aura is just filled with love and heartbreak." I felt his eyes harder now and I wanted to crawl up into a hole and die.

"Thanks professor." I said sarcastically.

<><><><><><><>

"What's up with you?" As soon as Draco asked Mat lifted my chin to him.

"What's wrong?" Mat asked. 

"I'm fine, just class was heavy."

"Why? What happened?" He questioned. 

"Michael was sitting behind me and he and his friend were talking about the ball and who they were taking." I noticed Mat tensed. He never knew how to act when I spoke about Michael. 

"He accidentally slipped out that he didn't want to dance with anybody else, and he knew I heard him. And then bloody Trelawny goes and says how my aura is full of love and heartbreak, and he definitely heard."

"That's unfortunate." Draco said.

"What makes you think that?" I said sarcastically. I looked back down and Mat put a reassuring hand on my thigh. He kept it there.

"Dav," Draco said and aimed his eyes behind me. I was confused for a moment and then I saw Michael approaching us and Mat quickly took his hand off my thigh.

"Hey um, Da- yeah can I talk to you." He didn't say my name, he didn't want to say my name. I swallowed and nodded and I glanced at Draco as I stood up who looked concerned for me.

"I'll see you guys later."

We walked out of the hall and he always stayed more than a metre away from me. Then he gestured to an empty classroom. I leaned against a desk and he was several feet away from me and he just stood there.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I broke the ice and looked at him. 

"I just wanted to see if you were okay, after class."

"Yeah, I'm okay. Professor didn't help." He chuckled, I saw his smile.

"Sorry, about what I was saying."

"I should be apologising. We'd be going together and I ruined that."

"It's fine, It's not your fault. I'm just not ready to go with someone."

"Okay." We were looking at each other, really looking at each other. It made me shiver. I smiled a little and he stepped forward slightly, so I did the same. 

"What about you?"

"Not sure. I'll probably go with Mat or Draco if they don't have a date."

"So you're not with anyone?" He stepped forward again. 

"Not at the moment, no." Another step.

"Okay."

"I haven't uh- gotten the chance to thank you for getting me home from that party."

"Did you at least go to bed straight away?"

"I was sick, Mat helped me after I basically fell in the common room. Sorry for getting wasted."

"Why did you?"

"I was just, upset, over what happened."

"Why were you upset?"

"I didn't want to kiss Anthony and I didn't expect him to do that, and I didn't expect you to react like that."

"Sorry."

"Not your fault."

"You know that I... but do you?" 

I tried being as blunt as possible. "I ended it because I wasn't in love with you and I didn't believe I would."

"Wasn't what I asked."

"Yes, I still do. I think I will always."

"But if you didn't love me then how do you still have feelings for me?"

"I dont know."

"See, I think  - and it's been annoying me, I think that you fell in love with me but you were too scared." I know he is insanely smart, but this one time he is wrong. 

"Michael that's not it."

"I know that's what it was D-. Can I just do something, and it mean absolutely nothing. I just want to see something."

"Say my name." He stepped forward once more and now we were close enough that we felt each others breaths. He closed his eyes and his jaw clenched. 

"Davina," he whispered and it was like my name unlocked a part of him because his pupils dilated instantly. 

Every muscle in my body un-tensed as he snaked his hands around my waist. He slid them under my shirt so he could feel my skin and shivers ran down my spine. He squeezed my waist. 

"I've wanted to touch you so bad," he groaned.

His hands ran down my sides and then he raised them to cup my face. He put a strand of hair behind my ear and then he trailed his finger along my jawline and on my cheek and his thumb parted my lips. Every inch of me was pulled towards him as he touched me. 

He licked his own lips as he touched me and it made me wet in a certain place. 

He finally leaned down and his lips were only millimetres away so I joined them. My hands wrapped around his back and my fingertips were pushing him toward me and he groaned.

"Mmm don't make that noise," I said between kisses. 

"But I missed how you did that with your fingers." At that I moved my hands up to his hair and he moaned in the next kiss. We shouldn't be doing this. 

"Don't do that either."

"Why not." I pulled away.

"Fine." I took off my robe and pulled off his and then I unbuttoned his shirt and threw it off. He pulled me into him to kiss him again as he unbuttoned my shirt and took it off. I went for his pants and he lifted me onto the desk now. Our kissed were aggressive and passionate and I wanted him more. He finished unbuttoning his pants and he lifted my skirt up to myself stomach and pulled off my underwear. He pulled down his boxers and we stopped kissing as his tip was at my entry. We kept eye contact while we moaned as he thrusted himself inside me. 

We really shouldn't be doing this. 

<><><><><><><>

"We shouldn't have done that."

"Why? We're both not seeing anyone and we still have feelings for each other. I don't see the problem."

"We're not together anymore."

"And whose fault is that."

"Michael."

"No, please just let me have this. I'll leave you alone after this."

"It's already after, it's happened."

"Oh, come on. You know I love you. Spend the night with me, and then tomorrow, you can even leave before I wake up and then we go on with our lives as if it didn't happen."

"But I still want you in my life."

"I know what I said before, about how we can be friends eventually. But I'm sorry, I cannot be your friend. You're either mine or you're not, and you don't want that so then... not."

"But why?"

"I can't hang out with you and just be your friend. I can't be with your friends and watch you leave to go and sleep in either Malfoy's or Riddle's bed. I can't watch you go to the ball and dance with someone that's not me. I can't listen to you talk about someone else and I sure as hell don't want to be around when some other guy gets to touch you." I didn't say anything I just walked out and headed to his dorm.

I didn't even think twice as I undressed and went in his bathroom. He was there shortly after and we showered together. He kept kissing me and holding me like I was always threatening to run from him.

"Can you just stay with me until I die?" He asked rhetorically as he kissed me against the shower wall. He turned off the shower and kept kissing me as he lead us out of the shower and out of the bathroom. He dressed me in his clothes and lifted me in his bed and he followed shortly after. I was smiling as I laid in his bed, my scent still lingered.

"You know what was most painful?" He asked and waited shortly until he continued. "Not only was coming back to find all of your things gone but going to sleep for the first time without you and still having your smell all around me. Thanks for leaving the perfume by the way."

"I did take one of your jumpers."

"Really? Which one?"

"The one you were wearing the first time we met, and the one you wore when we kissed for the first time."

"I thought I was the sentimental one."

"I know I didn't fall in in love with you but I loved you. A lot."

"Loved?"

"I still do, but we just haven't spoken in so long."

"I know."

"What happens after this?"

"I told you."

"I know, but It's too hard now, It's like you died and I'm not allowed to see you or talk to you anymore." The thought of Cedric floated in my mind and my eyes started to water.

"Hey," he said and made me look at him. "How bout this, if, in the future we happen to make eye contact, I'll smile."

"Okay."

"If you ever need me, I'll always be here. Let's just enjoy this." I was about to apologise for everything again but I realised that we both understood one another and there was nothing more to say, just to be with each other on more time. 

We kissed softly, and I slowly got on top of him and we made love slowly and passionately.