Chapter 17o part 2 Feelings

After there conversation, Kaname gets up and leaves. Going to his office to plan this charade. Which leaves Yuki and Zero sitting there alone together.

"Are you ever going to forgive me for this?" Zero asks. "If what Kaname is saying is true, there isn't anything to forgive. You were caught up in the crossfire of his mess." Yuki responds. "Does that mean, you will get close to me? We haven't had sex since we returned to this house. You let me do anything I wanted to you at the bar. Once here, you haven't touched or even kissed me in a romantic way." Zero replies. "I am dealing with things in my own way. It's not easy. There are so many questions going through my mind." Yuki admits. "Then ask me." Zero spats. "Are you really going to be able to live here all of a sudden and share with Kaname? After all these years of hating the idea?" Yuki asks. "Do I have a choice? Have I had a choice? Even when I wasn't going along with it. It doesn't stop it from happening. You still always run back to his bed for some reason. Your suppose to be bonded to me. That sex with anyone else wouldn't be the same. Yet you still run to him. Is it just to piss me off? Is it to play us against each other? I see that he doesn't get it as much as me. And you do even try to stay away from him when we are together. Yet, one thing I do, and back to him you go." Zero spats.

"You son of a bitch! I didn't run back into his bed the last time. You told me to. Told me you no longer wanted me. That I should give it a try with him. Make it work. While you were out fucking every woman you would meet!" Yuki Shouts. "THere it is. The firey Yuki I know. I haven't even seen that since I been home. I know you're holding that against me Yuki. I know it hurts you. It's not even sharing you with Kaname that is really worrying you. Its what I did with the others. If you don't let that go, we are never going to get back what we had." Zero admits.

"Would you get over it? If I did it? I don't mean with Kaname. I mean with strangers." Yuki states. Tears running down her face. "I am sure it would take me a long time. I didn't like when Ben was all over you. I wanted to through him all over that bar. I know it hurts. All of this might not even be our faults. Do you really think, I would want to be with any others?" Zero asks. "Thats just it. I don't know anything anymore. The Zero I thought I knew, is so different." Yuki says. "I'm not. The one standing in front of you at the moment. IS the real Zero. The one that loves you and only you. The one that wants to spend the rest of his life with you. If all this is her game, don't let her win. I don't remember half of the things the bartender is saying I did. Maybe I didn't do them?" Zero says. "If thats true where did you learn all those things? At the bar you took over my body, You knew just where to touch, Just what to do. You were in control." Yuki comments. "You make me feel that way. I didn't take you that way because someone taught me." Zero answers. "Then what? Where have you learned Anal sex? We have never done that before all this started. Not even when my dark side was out and needing everything you had to give." Yuki confesses. "You think I have done that with others? You Think thats why I want to do that with you?" Zero asks. "Why else?" Yuki spats.

"Because it was the only damn place Kaname never had. I was your first and only. LIke I wanted to be in everything. ANd always was too damn late for. He always got there before me. First kiss, First time in sex. First marriage. First child. First love. What the fuck? I was always on the sidelines. I knew he never did that with you. It turned me on to take your virginity there. To be the first and only to enter you. It had nothing to do with anything else. And Learn? You can learn it from looking it up on the internet." Zero admits.

Yuki starts laughing. "What the hell is so funny. I just let out my true feelings." Zero huffs. "Thats what all this is about? Kaname? I should have known. Do you think, I didn't want you to be my first? My Only? That this charade that we live I would like to stop? That these god damn chains would be broken? Do you think I like this? That I want this? That Because Kaname fucked over Sara, I have to deal with the aftermath?" Yuki Shouts.

" I know you love and care for him Yuki. That part of this isn't a charade. I know your dark half wants us both. I am not going to live in the dark anymore trying to pretend thats not true. I am here, and willing to do, what I need to do. To have you. " Zero answers. "I do care for him, I just wish I didn't. I wish things were normal. Like we were when we were at the townhouse. Just me and you. I just also know that can never be. If we can't get along as a couple of three, there will never be peace or happiness. For us or our children." Yuki states. "I already know that. I will do what I need to do. I am not sure, why I am even jealous anymore." Zero comments. "Because your normal human form is there. Just like mine is still in here." Yuki says pointing to her heart.

"It's just shared with my vampire half, who cares about only getting what I want. What I desire. For us to be able to do this, That is the part we are going to have to use." Yuki adds. "I promise you, We will have a peaceful life. We will get through whatever they are throwing at us. I will make it work with Kaname. I love you more than anything in this world Yuki. I always have and always will." Zero comments. "I feel the same about you. I never loved Kaname the way I do you. I am close to him, yes, but you hold my heart. I can't live without you, and I really don't want to."

Zero sees that for the first time in awhile she was honest with her feelings. Telling him really just how much, she does care. He knew he was going to have to keep his word. To make this work. It was either that or being torn apart. Which hasn't worked in the past and wouldn't now.