Someone is sitting in the
shade of a tree today because
someone planted a tree
a long time ago
-
Warren Buffet

__________________

All my girls are sitting around the dining table, having brunch. Maggie is cooking, the old woman who's Daniel's chef and she's the same woman who loves Annabelle and hates me. I really didn't want her here but Daniel insisted that she's a great maid.

The boys are scattered all over the living room, watching games and I swear my eyes keep drifting towards the TV even in between the gossips. It's Monday today which means Thursday is New Year's Eve so we're planning our New Year's Eve party.

"I love skating," Angel says, explaining how much she liked our Christmas Eve activities. We did go for skating and that was amazing but I suck at it. Just like cooking.

I take a bite from the chocolate cookie that Maggie baked. It's tastes amazing, so me and Gracie can't stop eating them. "I want to go to Bali for my vacation," Hope says, taking a bite from her coconut cookie.

"You have a vacation only for a week." I have to clear my throat, which is getting scratchy like there's air freshener that's annoying it or something.

"I've wanted to go to Thailand since I was seven years old. It's like, dream vacation. And Adam knows it." Phoenix pauses and frowns. "At least, he better know it."

"I know nothing," Cassy says.

Leila nods. "Same. Ryan's oblivious, and even if he wasn't, he wouldn't talk about it at home. Anyway, gossip and Ryan go together and I really don't understand why."

My gut grumbles, and something sour twists halfway between my mouth and my belly, and my lips are starting to itch. "Is it warm in here?"

"No, it's—ohmygod, Allison," Hope snaps, rising to her feet and moving towards me.

I wiggle my nose, eyes both watering and going round at the same time.

I know what this is.

I know exactly what this is.

I look down at the chocolate cookie that is placed in front of me. Jesus Christ!

"Are you okay?" Cassy asks.

"Okay? Honey, she needs a doctor." Hope grabs my hand and lifts it so we can all see the flush spreading my skin. "Are you allergic to-oh, no. Daniel," she call out.

"Maggie," Leila calls as she darts away.

Cassy grabs my plate and eats the cookie. "Ally, did you have it?"

"Jus a li'l," I slur.

Mostly because my tongue is tingling and won't work right either.

"Did you add strawberries in these?" Hope asks when Maggie comes out of the kitchen.

She shrugs. "Yeah."

Hope's eyes widens. "I told you Allison is allergic to strawberries," she grits out, glaring at the old woman.

"I forgot," Maggie mutters and I realize that she's lying. She knew I was allergic to strawberries and managed to hide the fact that the chocolate cookie had strawberry in it.

"I'm okay," I manage to say like a normal human being who isn't having an allergic reaction to strawberries.

Oh, god.

Oh god, oh god, oh god.

I wheezed, and then a violent pain sliced through my stomach. Clutching my abdomen, I slipped off the chair and landed on my knees, doubling over until I was pressing my forehead against cool wood flooring. Daniel's face appeared in front of me.

"Allison," he whispered, holding me close. "Ryan, start the car," he shouts and I tried to tell him I was okay, but it took me another second to realize I couldn't speak...because my throat was swelling.

I blinked because my eyes were swelling too. My medication is in my penthouse. I didn't need it actually since I was always careful about what I eat. My breathing got worse. My lungs seized because I could no longer get oxygen, and I think I began to vomit, but I was so weak, and my skin was so cold and clammy, I just stay in Daniel's arms. He's shouting something but I can't hear anything.

The second before I lost consciousness, a tear slipped down my cheek. This was going to hit him hard. He'd lived his whole life waiting for someone to love him, and now I had to leave him. Not wanting that for him, I tried one last time to tell him how much I love him but I couldn't.

"Don't scare me, Allison. Do not fucking scare me like that." I listen to my husband's voice and I want to smile but I control it as I keep my eyes closed.

Are you alive?

I am perfectly fine and breathing in ease.

You scared heck out of me.

Did I?

People are pacing back and forth not knowing what is happening to you.

Oh?

You better open that eyes of yours. It's New Year's Eve.

What? Oh my God. I immediately try to open my ey-

"I love you." I freeze and stop opening my eyes in mid way.

No way! Out of all the places he could tell me this, he chose a hospital room where I look like a maniac sleeping in a bed.

I try to open my eyes but I can't.

You got to bed kidding me. Open your eyes. You better open it.

"I was so scared to tell you. I was waiting for the right moment, planning something special for you but I.. I can't spend another second without telling you. Jesus, baby, wake up."

Oh my sweet baby! This is...

"Judge is almost on the verge of a meltdown. Wake up so you can see it yourself." His voice was cracking. "I fired Maggie. I'm so sorry she did this to you. Wake up, Ally."

I slowly open my eyes and adjusts myself to the bright lights in the room. I'm in the clean environment of a hospital room which I already knew. I slowly turn my head towards my left where Daniel is holding my hand. I test my limbs. My right arm smarts, and I notice the IV attached to it on the inside of my elbow. I hate all this.

"D..Da.." I can't talk.

"Allison," Daniel whispers, his eyes turning wide. He immediately rushes outside to call someone.

Then it takes around half an hour for the doctor to check me and instruct me certain things. I was fine, my rashes were gone and my throat felt better after I drank water.

Everyone visited but I couldn't talk to anyone.

Did you loose your voice?

Shut up! What I meant was that I ain't ready to talk to anyone. I just need to get the hell out of here. It's New Year's Eve and who spends it in a hospital?

Uh.. You?

Shut up.

I turn towards Judge who frowns at me. I give him my sweetest smile and his frown deepens. "Did you buy me donuts?" I ask Judge who rolls his eyes. It was a tradition again. We always buy donuts on New Year's Eve.

"Everything is ready for you. All we need is you to come back," Cassy says, smiling wide.

I nod at her. Few of my friends, Dad and Thomas are here and they all look tired. My eyes move towards Daniel who hasn't looked at me yet so I guess we aren't talking from here. He looks like he hasn't taken a bath since days but I really want to hug him. Does that make me weird?

Hmm.. Maybe.

Great!

"I need to hug my husband. Get out." My voice was low but I'm glad that it's clear.

"Can she be anymore polite?" Hope asks sarcastically before walking out of room and others follow her.

Once everyone were out, Daniel walked towards me. I didn't say anything, all I did was wrap my arms around him and rested my head on his chest. He held me as I inhaled his scent. No words were required right now.

"Are you okay?" The question slipped out before I could stop it.

When I looked over, Daniel simply nodded. His eyes were hooded, as if I had pulled him from a deep sleep, and I found myself wanting to reach over and touch him. Not in a sexual way. Just as a connection to another person. To my man.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. He clenched his fingers into his palms. "I didn't know Maggie would do it."

"You have nothing to be sorry about."

Why is he talking to me like a stranger? We were more friendly than this for our first meeting.

My spine relaxed, and my body curved into the couch. As it did, he let his gaze drift down over me. The top I wore was white and stretchy, opening in a V above my chest. I wore no bra. My bottoms were green flannel with smiley faces covering them. The waistband had to be tucked somewhere below my belly because my shirt clung in a way that if a band of elastic were positioned underneath, it would be obviously visible. I looked weak and tired and nobody can blame me for that. I just survived an allergic reaction.

I still remember Judge shouting at me in the afternoon for not carrying my medicines in my purse. I know that was a stupid decision from my part but in my defense everyone knew I was allergic to strawberries and it has been around two years since I had an allergic reaction so I just assumed that nothing would happen. Who knew that there are old women behind me with cookies to kill me.

"I'm glad we were able to get you to hospital on time," he whispered. From what I heard from Angel, it was a difficult ride. Snow had messed up the road, the boys cleared the snow from the driveway, then they'd driven into hospital.

I look at Daniel. He had a cold expression. Is that how he want to continue this? Considering me as a stranger? Well, two can play a game.

"Me too," I murmured. My eyes blinked closed. "I appreciate you doing that for me."

"My pleasure."

You got to be kidding me.

He has gone nuts.

He really should let me go back to bed. It was obvious that I don't like the way this conservation is going.

He leaned over and reached down for my feet and my eyes cracked open, and I watched him as he moved. When he lifted me at the ankles, tugging slightly in his direction, my brows went up in surprise. But then I shifted, helping him to turn me on the couch. I wouldn't need such help in normal condition but I'm not in my normal healthy situation right now. That damn doctor insisted on complete rest and right now I think he is right. I can't even move without someone's help.

I slid lower on the cushion, and when he tucked my feet securely into his lap, my eyes closed once again. A soft breath escaped from me, and this time I found myself wanting to reach over and touch, it was to put my lips against his.

I wouldn't do that, though. I did have enough control to be angry and he deserves it. He says sweet, lovely things when he thinks I'm unconscious and when I'm conscious, he behaves as if this is the first he's been in a room with me.

Who said women are weird? It's men. Men are weird and damn annoying.

I gulp when he didn't take his eyes off me. My legs had swelled, along with the rest of my body but I was still confident that I looked beautiful. One gift that I got from my mom—her beauty. It's just so natural and I can't complain about it.

"You look tired," He spoke in an almost whisper, not sure if I remained awake or not, and totally unsure why he'd brought it up.

When my eyelids drifted open, he looked uneasy. "I dream about my mother sometimes,” he explained. "I dreamt again about the day she died. I think the stress of everything" —his eyes lowered to my feet—"of everything, of..." He finished the next sentence with a shrug. "I don't remember much but it still haunts me at times."

"Oh." Is he opening up? Telling me about his past? Is that why he looked uneasy?

I watched him through slitted lids.

"Do you have the dream often?" I asked. One hand went to my stomach since it did hurt. Damn strawberries.

"Only recently."

He saw the question in the squint of my eyes but he offered nothing more. He dreamed of his mother's death...he was a just kid when he saw his mother being raped.

Jesus! I couldn't even imagine it.

"You were the only one there at that time."

"I was."

"And you were just a kid." My free hand lifted, as if I intended to reach for him, but it drifted back to my side. He don't want me right now.

So I was surprised when he reached for it. He wrapped his fingers arounds mine, the backs of his knuckles sliding along the side of my belly, and my hand was chilled. The temperature in the room had dipped too low, but I didn't want to break the moment by asking him to stoke the fire.

He leaned over and picked up the blanket spread it over me. After tucking the ends around my feet, he rested one hand at my ankles. Then he reached for my hand again.

"I was four," he confirmed.

"And your father passed away just before a month?"

It took him a moment to answer, even with a nod. Because that wasn't a direction he was willing to let the conversation go and I knew it. At the age of four he lost his parents in a drastic away and no kid can easily come out of it.

"Dad and mom adopted me very soon," he said, and in return, I mimicked his nod.

"You were happy after that?" I tilted my head on the armrest as I asked the question.

"I stayed with them for one year after which mom got pregnant. It was a miracle and they didn't have time for me so they sent me to Thomas' house. I was happy there, Carla made sure of it but it didn't last long. Dad and mom lost the child due to a miscarriage and they were back to get me after a year. I didn't want to go but I dragged me along with them. I didn't talk to them after that, I was always silent and focused on school. I was just ten when they sent me to boarding school and that wasn't a...nice experience. Then it was college which was actually fun and finally I took over the company. Then it's you and your craziness. "

My eyes went wide at his last sentence, and he couldn't hold back the chuckle.

I did my best to look down my nose at him. "A polite man would have never say something like that about a charming woman."

"I'm not a polite man, Allison."

I don't know why but my cheeks turned pink. He definitely isn't a polite man.

"Surely you knew that from before," he added. He hadn't been at all polite from the very moment I met him. He definitely wasn't a gentleman either. He shouted without considering where they were and he ordered food without asking me. He never opened doors for women, he wasn't used to actual flirting and he most definitely doesn't like smooth talk.

Those are the reasons I love him. He's rude, arrogant but he can be sweet when he wants to. And he's definitely not polite in bed. He'd taken me up against the wall, over the back of the couch, and basically, every way a man could take a woman. And we both still wanted more.

"Daniel..." I let the word trail off, averting my gaze instead of saying anything more.

"I'm sorry," he apologized. For what?

"I didn't mean to hurt you that day by avoiding your question." He squeezed my ankle, where it lay beneath his palm, and when I turned, he spoke. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to just confess because you asked. I wanted to surprise you. I ain't a guy who likes to be romantic but you love it and I wanted to give it you."

I studied him as if trying to determine if he was serious, and he was and once again he melted my heart.

I'm glad he isn't a lawyer because if he was one then I'm sure I wouldn't be able to win a case against him. He always ties my tongue with his words and melts my heart with his sincerity and owns me with the love that I see in his beautiful eyes.

Instead of blurting all this, I nodded. And stayed where I was. The mood went back to quiet, and I found it as comforting as before. "We never talked about those expectations. We decided we would stay married but nothing else was spoken and I didn't know what you wanted. You know everything about me and I'm sure you know how scared I am about loosing you. I love you, Allison. I just can't stop loving you." He held his breath after making the statement.

Didn't I tell you that he has a way with words. My sweet man.

"Okay," I started to push to a sitting position, but he held tight to my foot.

Aren't you going to say it back?

No! Not yet. I have one more thing to do before I tell him how much I love him and moreover he made me wait a lot.

You got to be kidding me.

I know, I can be a bitch.

Allison...

"Stay where you are." He nodded, without complaining about not giving a reply to him. Maybe he already knows that I love him just like I knew about his feelings.

"Daniel..." I swallowed and again looked away. But this time I brought my gaze back on my own. "This feels... strange."

He played dumb. "Your lying down feels wrong?"

"Me lying down with my feet in your lap when you're talking to me like a stranger without holding me in your arms feels strange."

He looked around then, taking in the room. A chill remained, the light from the fire barely aglow, and the snow, though it had finally stopped coming down several hours before, was plastered to every window. The moment felt as if they were cocooned inside an igloo together. As if they were the last two people on earth.

"Still," he said. He loosened his grip on her foot and released the hand still in his. He let me know without words that if I wanted to get up, he wouldn't stop me. "I like it," he finished.

When I made no additional moves to rise, only eyed him from my end of the couch, he brought both hands back to my ankles and shifted around so that he faced me.

He nodded. "Now, I need to know why you're not ready to forgive your father."

I stared at my feet. Daniel's hands had slipped under the blanket and were now slowly massaging my left foot.

A freaking moan tried to slip out.

"Allison?"

I lifted her gaze.

"Your father?"

What was going on right now? First of all, I survived from an allergic reaction, Daniel had then opened up to me; he'd confessed his love, and now he planned to massage my feet while I explained to him how I messed up my relationship is with my parents. Didn't he already knew about the issues between me and my parents.

"Ooh." I couldn't hold in the moan as Daniel's thumbs stroked from my heel to the ball of my foot. It had been too long since I'd been able to do anything more than slip my shoes on, and dang it, that felt good. "What are you doing, Daniel?"

I couldn't just let him do this. He's messing up with my control and he's the only one who can do that to me.

His hands stilled over my sock-covered feet. "Your feet has swelled. I thought this might feel good."

There was a question in his eyes, as well as his voice. He wasn't trying to seduce me. He seriously just thought this would be a nice thing to do. And he hadn't been wrong. "It does feel good."

"Do you want me to stop?" Why is he being polite now? Where's the guy who would glare at me when I question him? Why is he being so patient with me? Am I going to die? Does allergic reaction do that?

"No." She shook her head. "I don't want you to stop."

"Good."

He went back to massaging, switching to my other foot, and I closed my eyes and tried to remember the decisions I'd made before. Meeting the board members was the first on the list but I can't do that for another week because of the bed rest. Last few days had been intense all the way around, and had seemed more than I could handle. I'm just like a baby when I get sick and that's why I am careful about getting sick.

All these pain in my body has just fueled up my anger for Anaconda. Though Maggie didn't admit that she tried to hurt me for Anaconda, I know Anaconda does have a role in it. That's attempt of murder though I don't plan to take it to that extent. Yet.

Not my first time going through such experiences but trying to harm me through cookies wasn't really something that I expected. I love cookies and I don't think I can have it again unless it's made by me, Judge or...Daniel. I can't find deep inside me to trust anyone else.

Though I did forgive Cassy for everything, that experience did made me feel like I shouldn't trust anyone. I know...my friends wouldn't try to kill me but I'm scared. I wasn't afraid before but now I am scared about dying. I don't want to go away from Daniel, Judge and my family. I've started enjoying my life other than work. I've started trying to reduce my work pressure so that I can spend more time with Daniel. I'm comprising with my professional life so that I can bring a smile on his handsome face. I don't feel unwanted anymore.

"You really want to talk about that now?" I asked, brushing off my thoughts and doing my best not to let my eyes roll to the back of my head because of the things he continued doing to my feet.

"I do."

Fine. Then talk they would do. Because, he opened himself and now it's my turn whether I like it or not.

"I don't hate my parents. I'm not interested in spending more time with them."

His hands quit moving. "Why not?"

She gave a shrug. "I just don't. They weren't there for two decades so they can't demand now that they want to spend more time with me."

Daniel stared at me, unblinking for several seconds before responding. "But I saw how painful it was for you when they announced about the divorce."

"Really?" She did push up then. "Those two told me they were getting divorced and now they changed their plan. I don't get it."

He stayed as he had been, still sitting with one knee propped on the couch. "They didn't change the plan," he explained. "I'm not sure what it is but Judge did have a very friendly talk with your Dad after which they started going together to play golf."

You got to be kidding me again. I gawked at him. He sounded so carefree about Judge talking to my Dad. When did Judge do that? He told me he would never get involved with my issues.

"I don't care about their talk. It's not easy, Daniel. Almost twenty-two years of my life was spent without their love and my childhood was worse because I tried so hard to impress them. I joined in every activities, skipped grades so that they can be proud of me. I tried so hard. "

His jawline tensed. "I know, Allison. I'm not asking you to go for picnic with them. Just talk. Let out things and hear them out."

I glared. There would be no talking. "They hurt me, Daniel. I hate them," I shout, anger getting out of my control.

His nostrils flared. "You don't. We both know that."

"I hate my mom," I shout, louder this time.

The answer, as well as the harsh delivery, caused me to jerk back. Did I think really hate my mother? I don't know. I never said it loud. Not even once. Not even to my therapist. Tears threatened to fall from my eyes but I held them back and blinked them away.

"Why would you say that?" It was hard to answer that question. Hard not to wonder if he could foresee something in me. "Why do you hate your mother? Why not your father?"

Ringing started in my ears but Daniel didn't move an inch. He was waiting for an answer.

"Dad had a reason, Daniel. He had a reason to avoid me but mom didn't. How can she just ignore her daughter? No matter who the father is, I was still her daughter. Her flesh. She should have been there for me. When I had my periods for first time, it was the servant who helped me. Not my mother. It was painful. When I was in the cheerleader group, I saw my classmates with their mothers but my mom never came to see me in school. She never asked me whether I had my dinner."

The hardness of his expression had me want to move towards him but I couldn't.

"I hated Dad at first but when I was twelve, I realized that he thought I wasn't his daughter. I believed it too. So I understood him and I no longer hated him. I wasn't his daughter but he gave me his name. He would come to my room at night and kiss my forehead. Sometimes, I heard him enquire about me to the servants and that made me feel better. He wanted to hold me but he couldn't do it because he knew how much Mom hated to see me with him. It made her feel more guilty. Why did she punish me for her mistake?" I continued, "Of course, I'm angry at Dad too because he didn't try harder to be me and he didn't want to confirm whether I'm his daughter. All this hurts but I can understand him and I don't hate him. I hate my mother. I hate her so much."

Tears finally rolled down my cheeks and I blew out a soft breath. "She may have changed now but that doesn't matter anymore. She is out of my heart and she can never get back there. She would sit with Ashley for hours to help her with the homework and that killed me. Made me feel worthless. I had to grow up. I moved out when I was sixteen and I had to work three jobs to pay my rent, food and thankfully I had scholarship for college. I never took one penny from them though they offered it. It was the anger towards my parents that pushed me forward. The pain of being alone, being ignored was too much to handle.

"I started therapy when I was twenty, after I saw the paternity test. I couldn't come out of the house for a week because I felt so weak and worthless. I was his daughter. I was my dad's daughter but still I had to suffer all this. It would have been better if I wasn't his daughter. At least, I would have been able to maybe forgive her if I wasn't dad's daughter. I would have been able to understand something if the result was negative. My childhood and teenage would have been much better if they atleast had the common sense to do a paternity test but damn them. I'm trying my best to forget everything but it's not easy. I'm serious when I say that I forgive them and I can be civil towards them but nothing more." I wiped my tears and took a deep breathe.

Daniel stared at me with his usual cold expression. "Ashley talked about you being in a hospital. What's that about?"

Finally, the question I was dreaded to hear was asked.

"Your dad mentioned something about abuse. What was it?" he asked, he was pushing me and I can't avoid it anymore. There's no reason to avoid that question.

I swallowed. "I heard my mom arguing with dad about some party and business deal. I didn't understand much. All I understood was that she wanted me to go for a party with a client's son who was twenty years old. I was sixteen and I was already in college since I graduated early from high school. He was my senior." I sighed. "Ethan. That was his name. Dad didn't want me to go but I told Mom that I would go for her. That was the first time since years, she smiled at me. I was dumb and stupid. Wanted to impress her for the last time. I wanted to try for one last time for her attention so I went for the party with him as his date."

He seemed to consider my answer, and as he did, I tried to come up with ways to let all this out in some easy way. Nothing came to mind.

"So," finally said. "what happened?"

I wished I'd turned the light on so I could see him better. His eyes were shadowed. I blinked as I pushed forward, however, lowering my gaze to the middle of his chest.

"Party happened." I glanced up. My mouth had gone dry. "He got drunk and started flirting with some girls forgetting about me," I croaked out. "Later, when I went to find him so that I can get back to home, I saw him trying to force a girl. She was my junior in college and the protective nature in me woke up. I pushed him away, punched him hard on his face. His friends entered the scene and well they were drunk and I was a boxing champion. I hit them not caring about the consequences because the girl was seriously hurt. Her lips and head were bleeding, her pink dress was torn and I was angry. I took most of them down, I guess. Then...they injected something on my neck, it was so quick. I...I couldn't stop them. Some kind of drug but obviously that didn't work fast because I continued hitting them. They were bleeding but I didn't stop. Suddenly, Ethan pushed me and my head hit on the wall. The force was too much that I lost consciousness."

Tears threatened, and though they'd likely spill out no matter how hard I tried to contain them, I hoped the sweep of hair falling in front my face would hide the evidence. This was too hard.

"They hit me when I was unconscious. Threatened the girl to not tell anything to anyone and someone found me in the sidewalk bleeding to death. I was in coma for two months."

"Allison." He said my name softly, leaving me to wonder if the moment was hard for him, as well.

I shook my head. "My mom believed Ethan when he said that I used drugs and walked out without listening to him. It was Judge who filed the case and Dad had doubts too. When I woke up, my mom immediately started shouting at me for using drugs. I couldn't believe her. My first thought was, 'she really is a cruel mother.'"I somehow managed to rise from the couch on my own, keeping my face turned from Daniel's as I did. "The nurse had to pull her out of the room and then it was just me and Judge. I cried that day. Because I met Judge just before few months and he trusted me but my mom didn't. Dad went ahead with the case, and Ethan and his friends are in prison. I missed classes for few months, moved out of their house and started living with Judge for some time before me and Alex rented a room. I graduated, practiced as a junior for sometime and started my own firm before a year. Then you entered my life. Making me believe in relationships again, bringing the romantic girl inside me."

Daniel rose behind me. "Allison," he said again, this time more insistent. More urgent.

I didn't face him, but I also didn't walk away. Not yet. "What?"

"Come here."

At that, I whipped around. "What?"

"Come here," he said. His features gave nothing away. "I want to hold you."

I gaped at him. "You believe me? You believe me when I say I didn't use drugs." I shook my head without even realizing it.

"Why wouldn't I believe you? I know when you lie, Allison. You're not telling lies right now. Moreover, I trust you. Just because your mother didn't believe doesn't mean that nobody would believe you. The court believed you and that's why he's rooting in prison. If you did drugs then you would be brave enough to admit it. You would never try to hide your mistakes."

I gaped again. Why in the world is he trying to be sweet again?

I stretched out on the couch without another word, my head resting on his thigh. I'd turned on my side so I wasn't looking at him. But he watched me. I wanted to hug but that isn't the best option right now because I might cry. And crying makes me angry. Angry makes me grumpy. Grumpy spoils my day. So no crying which means no hugging Daniel for now.

I shifted to snuggle in just a little bit closer. He reached out his arm and rested it over my side, his hand wrapping around to the front of my belly, and I turned my head to smile up at him. "Thank you, for telling me everything," he whispers.

"Hmm." My lashes dipped briefly, and I could feel the pulse point in my neck pounding rapidly. "I'm really glad you're here."