I feel like such an evil bitch. I was rather blunt with my mum about a sensitive subject that needed to be addressed and I made her cry. I went to hug her and she rejected it. She's never done that before.

But it was really serious and needed to be talked about. I'd tried being more subtle and gentle but she wasn't listening.

And I have no one else. It's just me and her so I have no one to turn to that she'll listen to. I'm bloody 17, I'm a kid, and yes I've been through a lot but I have no idea what I'm doing. This is too much for me.

And now I'm worried  I fucked up for good. I feel awful. I'm such an awful cruel person. I hate myself. My mum probably hates me too.

Sorry for ranting but I needed to get it all out.