The solitude loves the company.

There are some moments that we, as humans, tend to take a toll over our feelings. Moments where we don't know where to look at or where to head to, where all we can do is stare into the oblivion, where our feelings are at their lowest levels.
And when that happens, sometimes it is nice to have some space to ourselves, so we can think about things and slowly regain our balance. But sometimes, for Ranmaru, those episodes where he felt stripped of everything, it took days, even weeks, to regain all that energy he had lost.

When those days came by, he says nothing. Slowly he goes farther and farther away from his group, and finally shuts himself until his body's had enough isolation. Because, honestly, it was almost always the same. Well, it was, because, ever since this certain blonde woman found out about it, slowly she gained the permission from the silverette to come by and check on him.

Truth be told, this was one of the many things he, incredibly, feared about being in a relationship. And certainly, once his partner found out about this, deep inside, she felt some kind of mother sense. Why? Because she could sometimes relate to his hardships. They went through different things as they grew up, but that o ly made her wiser in the matter.

Today, sadly, the episode that hardly ever happened, began. And she noticed this right away. How? The change in attitude. The silverette tended to fight for almost everything and anything if the Count of Permafrost ever so got a chance to have a word. And strangely enough, that same Count had asked her why the rocker was so 'off more than the normal'. This brought up her attention, and began to keep a close eye on the rocker. And in went on for around 3 days, until one of his teammates received a message from said rocker. This member sighed, turning around to face the left members and the girlfriend of said rocker, raising his hand with the phone gripped in it, he spoke

"Ran-Ran texted me, he says he'll be absent for a few days. Says he needs some time to 'get a hold of things'. Does this sound familiar?"

Asked a worried Reiji, looking at each other's eyes before the next member spoke, standing up

"The last time he took a 'break' was a year and a half ago, I assume this happened while you were still dating, right?"

The cyan hair boy asked, turning around to face the blonde female who was tapping her foot against the floor. Yes, that happened around that time, he had gone away a few times, but he had stated he needed a break for himself, and even so, he didn't let her close by. And it took months to her to find out the truth about those 'getaways'.

The Count was the next to speak, also getting up while turning to her as well

"As I can see, he wasn't planning on telling you. Or has he spoke to you?"

The girl nodded, crossing her legs while she kept looking down. Not only has he told her about this, but this matter wasn't something to take as a joke

"This happened 2 times last year, but he told me to not say anything, he didn't even allowed me in his appartment..."

The female sighed as she began to think about those times he just told her to not worry and closed the door on her face. Thankfully, she was not standing back again. She got up from her spot on the couch and faced the three males

"I will keep an eye on him, don't worry"

-----------

3 days have passed. 3 days where Ranmaru had turned off his phone and didn't even bother to answer whoever knocked on the door of his small apartment. 3 days where all he did was lay down in his sofa/bed and stare out of the window for hours until he got tired. 3 days of him eating whatever was left in the small fridge, and it was all junk food as of now.

"Maybe I should take a bath..." he mumbled to himself, sitting up on the sofa to then return to his original position
"...why should I, anyways?"

He had it pretty bad, not only that, he felt bad. He felt down. He felt like he wasn't going to do any good to anyone. And while his thoughts played with his feelings, some images popped into those negative comments; images of his current bandmates abandoning him, like his old bandmates did. His kouhais, the ones that now were standing up with him, also leaving behind, calling him those nasty names he used to be called. Finally, the image of his girlfriend, leaving him for someone else, because he wasn't enough. Those thoughts haunted him for hours to no end during times like this.

Thankfully, a knock on the door saved his thoughts from producing more painful scenarios. He sat up when the knocking kept on for a few minutes. He knew that if he ignored those, whoever was there would leave. He sighed as he again lays back on the sofa. His ears though picked the sound of the locks of the door being unlocked, and he got just a bit more alert. He sat up again just to be met by the blue eyes belonging to his girlfriend that scanned the place, the blonde walked in and closed the door behind her, locking it.

"I hope you haven't forgotten that you gave me a spare key"
she spoke as she took off her jacket and shoes, all while making small conversation
"Did you know that outside is like a freezer? I almost froze on my way here. Thank goodness the heaters are workin-"

"Why are you here, Danima?"
The rocker asked, he was actually a bit surprised that she came here, but the thoughts that kept triggering him to tell her to go where taking over.

The blonde looked at him as if he had grown horns and, right away, completely ignored that question. She knew he wasn't being serious. He was going through a rough moment and, even if he asked her to leave later, she would stick for a while.

"I came here to see you, what else? You're my boyfriend and I want to make sure you're alright. Now, maybe I should clean a bit, and... maybe I can prepare a hot tub for you"
she spoke softly as she began to pick up some papers that were scattered all over the floor, the place wasn't so dirty, considering Ranmaru cleans almost every day, but moving some things around might help with the illusion that the place looks cleaner.

Ranmaru didn't move from his place, he didn't even flinch when she moved the sofa back to the wall, he just kept following her with his eyes while she tidied up a bit.

"You're loosing your time here. Don't you have more important things to do?"
The silverette asked out loud, his tone wasn't cheerful at all. Though he deeply didn't mean it. His feelings were at their worst as of now.

Though the question surprised her, she wasn't hurt. She knew better than that. She simply kept organizing while she gave an answer

"Nope. I have some free days, so you'll be the only one of my priorities" she stated while giving him a small smile. And that there was what made his heart skip a beat after being almost emotionless for 3 days.

He didn't say anything else after that. This was somehow like a green light for her. She took it as an opportunity to prepare a hot bath, with this cold weather those felt nice. He didn't complain when she persuaded him to take a warm bath. Though because she didn't want to seem like an intruder, she left him alone while he bathed.

Ranmaru actually made a small effort to take a bath by himself, the warm water around him made his stiff muscled relax, it made him sigh and close his eyes as he scrubbed his body off from everything. He washed his hair while those bad thoughts had diminished themselves, he took his time to gain back some energy, and surely the bath helped a lot.

When he came out of the bathroom he was surprised by the small table he had, two meals already prepped, warm and served on the plates. The sofa looked cleaner than it did before, and it was adorned with a big and fluffy blanket.

"What is this?" He asked as he walked up to the sofa, sitting down and placing the small towel he was going to use for his hair beside him

"It's dinner, I'm not a great cook like you, but I know how to make a descent plate of macaroni and cheese" the blonde girl spoke as she emerged from what was the kitchen, holding two mugs of hot cocoa
"Here, unsweetened" she said softly while she sat beside him, picking up the small towel
"Do you want me to dry your hair?" She asked while holding up the towel, and now, the rocker didn't refuse this time, he moved so he was sitting on the floor and nestled between her legs, his head now on her lap.

The blonde smiled as she began to gently run the towel over his wet hair, gently rubbing his scalp with her fingers as she combed through his gray locks. Even though they didn't speak for a long while then, the silence was comfortable, she felt he was making a small effort and it made her happy.

The next step was to get him to eat something that was fairly good and filling. The smell of the macaroni was good enough to attract his attention. Just as she was done with his hair, he moved closer to the small table and began to eat in silence, the taste of the food actually making his stomach growl as a thank you.

Danima could only watch him from behind, a small smile breaking in. She decided to join in as well, silently eating her macaroni while every now and then, giving him small smiles.

When they were done, what was left was the hot cocoa. Ranmaru didn't waste any time and began to drink from his black mug, the warm beverage relaxing his body and mind. Then it him again, for a moment he felt that weakness again, he felt like a burden again, she had to go out of her way to make him do those basic things he should've done automatically. But at the same time, it showed him that he did wrong in ignoring her the last time he closed the door on her face, saying he'll be fine and he would take care of himself, and he didn't. He placed his mug down before he spoke again

"Why are you doing this?" He asked the blonde while looking down at his hands. The blonde seemed confused as she placed her mug down as well

"What do you mean? Cooking?  You always cook for both so-"

"No, why do you stay with me when I'm like this? Wrecked and lost?" He asked, his tone more harsher than before
"Why did you stay when I pushed you away?"

She swore she felt her heart drop when she heard those questions, but she understood those feelings. After all, she was the same back in her younger days, back in Permafrost. And precisely, because of those moment, she understood what was left to do.

"It's getting late. Do you want me to-"

"Don't evade the questions, damn it!" His voice rose up, now he looked at her. But he didn't shout out of anger, but out of pure confusion. When he saw the look she gave him, that frown that meant both 'I dare you' and 'I'm not deaf' at the same time, he sighed and turned around, getting up and sitting on the sofa.

It took a few minutes for her to stand up, and instead of sitting beside him, she walked over to the speaker and connected her phone to it. She looked for the song she wanted and pressed the play button, and before she went back to the sofa, she turned off the lights and o ly turned on the light of q small lamp that sat beside the sofa.

As the song began, Ranmaru immediately recognized it. His head whipped over to where she was standing, she was humming the song while she changed clothes right there.
They had seen each other change, so she didn't feel ashamed nor he was embarrassed.

Once she was in her pajamas, she returned to the sofa and sat beside him, moving her legs so that they're on each side of him. At this point he knew what she was doing.
He did told her once or twice that he loved cuddles, even if he would never ask for them. And after a few seconds, the scenery, the song playing in the back and her motioning him to get closer was everything to him now.

Seconds later he dived in to held her close, his arms wrapped around her waist, his head was resting on top of her chest, her legs were now wrapped around him and her hands, one over his back and one over his head. For the first moment in 3 days, he felt warm, he was able to slowly relax into her embrace.
Her hand now ran through his hair, the other up and down his back as she kept humming the song that kept replaying in the back, for moments she would peck his forehead or sing some of the lyrics to him.
"...Just put your hand on the glass
I'm here tryin' to pull you through
You just gotta be strong-"

"Repeat the last part" mumbled the rocker against her chest, tickling her right there with his breath, then he moved his head like a cat would, rubbing his forehead against where he felt her heart beating.

This small motion made her smile again, gently she pulled her face up from her chest and made him look into her eyes, his grey orbs were shining like hers, she leaned in slowly and pressed their foreheads together while still holding eye contact, and so she sang the lyrics that made him feel warm inside

"Aren't you somethin', an original
'Cause it doesn't seem merely a sample
And I can't help but stare, 'cause
I see truth somewhere in your eyes
I can't ever change without you
You reflect me, I love that about you
And if I could, I would look at us all the time.."
she sang. This song made her a bit emotional. This song wasn't just any song, but it was the one they've had grown a deep liking to. The meaning behind that song was the reason, when they didn't knew how to speak out their feelings, this song came up in the radio, and it clicked to them. That's the song. That's their song.

After a moment of her humming and pampering him, Ranmaru moved both of them so that he had her legs around his waist, his hands now went up to hold her face, he gently pulled her in close enough to seem like he would kiss her, but instead of that, he sang the next part of the song

"Now you're the inspiration of this precious song
And I just wanna see your face light up since you put me on
So now I say goodbye to the old me, it's already gone
And I can't wait wait wait wait wait to get you home
Just to let you know, you are..."
He finished the song with a small peck on her lips, now he felt a bit more relieved. And she surely felt happy to know he trusted her this much.

They knew there would be times like this, where one of them wouldn't be able to pull through without help, were the negative thoughts would take over their emotions, but knowing they have each other, in good and bad, during ups and downs. Having this subject being spoken by them, the answer was clear.

The girl hugged him again, rubbing her hands up and down his back now, her eyes closed and both laying in each other's embrace. That's the reason. Softly, she mumbled

"This is why I stay, this is why I'll be always there"

((THIS WAS SO LONG AND EMOTIONAL BUT BOIII I AM HERE FOR THIS TuT❤❤❤))