I am not just a drug dealer. I'm a hustler-an entrepreneur of sorts. Not the con artists you see on instagram selling tea and protein shakes. Unlike them, I don't rely on other people's insecurities to turn a profit. That's boring, unoriginal, and mad overdone. It's easy to con a dum fat man. At least one's gonna fall prey to the shit. It's hard to con a smart fat man. Greedy men care less about the size of their waistband as much as they do about the waistband of their pockets. Now, swindlin' a smart, confident, and greedy(and in turn wealthy) fat man: that's the juice. Actually, that's what I was doing when I met Connie.

My mother owns a catering company, Candice Caters, that I occasionally volunteer at-usually when I'm hunting for new moves to make. This round, it was a Sunday brunch for Mayor De Luna's campaign donors. I couldn't miss out on such a generous crowd. Once the food was set, the band was playing, and prior to the Mayor's "thank you" speech, I snuck out of the kitchen. After a quick and clanky change out of my uniform into a nicer button up and khakis inside of a broom closet, I snuck into the festivities.

Now, every artist must know their canvas, and I couldn't paint someone a fool if I didn't know them. I did some quick recon. I wasn't in the mood to seduce a sexually unsatisfied middle-age housewife or a so far trapped in the closet, he was one with the hangers, father of four, so instead I searched for a sleazy, upper-middle aged man with a barely legal sugar baby. I found this Asian doner named Jason Wu of Wu and Co. Wu and Co was the parent company of Yaz Electrics and Knightly Cable Company;both companies held a monopoly on the region. He wore Yeezy's with his freshly fitted suit, a tie stamped repeatedly with his company's logo(which was just [Wu & Co.] in white block letters), and a De Luna for Mayor button pinned to the right of his chest. His hand proudly draped around some blonde bitch-the miss America type ( ya know, the type of girl who thinks the crisis in Turkey is the lack of stuffing). Based on the fact that he wore a standard watch with his smart watch, which he clearly struggled to use, proved he wasn't some tech genius. He just had money to hire tech geniuses. His whole fit was a sad PR front for "hip with the times." I waited for blondie to run off to powder her nose or some shit before slithering in.

"Mr. Wu. Big fan, big fan!" I stuck my hand and my teeth out to greet him.

He took my hand, "why thank you-"

"Andrew Klecker. But you can call me Andy, sir."

"Thank you, Andy. It's nice to see young people interested in the tech industry," he boasted. Someone needed to bring this emperor some clothes.

"Of course! My friends and I dream of having such huge investments in the tech game-as you sir,"

"Well I tell ya what son, if ya continue to work hard, you can be just as successful as me some day. Heck," he let out the manliness of man laughs, " you might even be in the same meetings as me. If I'm not too old." He continued to laugh as he knocked his elbow with my shoulder. This fucking asshole...I just laughed along.

"Um...actually, sir. If you don't mind, I'd love to show a project some of my friends and I've been working on. We go to the university a few miles up the road, and we were working on this app for our final project. If it's not too much of an inconvenience, I'd love some feedback." I stared at him like a lost pup searching for jesus. He fell for it real hard. I don't think any woman has made him feel more like a man than I did in that moment.

It didn't take long before I was pitching him my dumb app idea of the week. I can honestly barely remember as all spiels felt more or less the same. Add a "next level coding and a "data processor" and sprinkle in a little bit of "competitive" and a spank of "Apple and Microsoft will wish they got in sooner," and I've got them in the palm of my hands. I've never made an app in my life, but I can use a buzzword like a motherfucker. I think it was either the "puppy patrol" self walking dog app or the "speedy pedal" cyclist dating app. In the end, Wu dropped a solid half a g on it and used the change exchange app to do it, proving just how trendy he was.

My mom said her gang could handle the tear down, but before I could sneak away from the crime scene, Connie grabbed my hand and pulled me into the nearest closet.

"I saw that." She wore bright red from her lipstick to her dress to the bottoms of her shoes.

"Saw what?" I leaned in with a smile, trying to figure out how someone so beautiful had yet to grace my presence.

"You totally just conned fat man Wu!" She laughed. It was ugly and honky and overall gross. I laughed along with her.

"Fat man Wu?" I wiggled a brow.

We spent the rest of the event together in that closet. Then the rest of our summer together. And now I haven't spoken to her since Klaus ratted us out. Mamma De Luna kept her on lock down, even from Darius. If I knew that weekend at the lake was our last? I don't think I would've done anything different, except maybe looked at her a little more. Ya know, listened to her laugh?

Connie's the first person I've met in years who could grind as hard-if not harder-than me. It's always been me and Maine against the world. Maine's like a technological genius and the fattest feminist in the wild west. She was also mad gay. Like super gay. Like, she fucked more bitches than me gay. I loved her. We had a great working relationship. She make all the dumb awful apps I needed, and I marketed her shit. Social campaigns and all. One time, Maine created a fake insta bot as an experiment that was modeled after this instagram model she despised. Within six months, the bot had more followers and she used it to expose all the plastic surgery and racist comments that littered the model's past and search history. I did all the promoting, she did all the digging. Darius would say she's the brains and I'm the face, but that's just a blatant misconception. We're equals. Business partners. She was the Jay-Z to my Beyonce.

She, however, HATED Connie. Called her every name in the book. But she loved me more, so she let us be, mostly keeping her comments to herself. The only reason she came along for the lake trip was to get Drew out of the house. They were headed separate places after high school, and they wanted to spend as much time together as they could before they left. I'm indifferent about shadow gal, Minerva Drew McKinney. She's been through some crazy shit and Maine was the only thing she had. I couldn't blame her for holding on to that with a tight grip. However, shit was mad unhealthy for the both of them. But...she had her toxic relationship and I had mine.

One of my many ways of wrangling Connie is going along with her schemes. Most of the time she gets what she wants or gets bored or both by the end of it. And all of the time, no one gets hurt...physically, anyway. Playing dress up and charming strangers was my whole thing, so when she handed me a costume-I was prepped and ready. I just needed strangers.

At the end of the road-there's the border to the other side. It's just a long stretch of road through a deep ass forest. Not much different than crossing the border into Canada, however it's strongly forbidden. Both sides lazily police the border since neither side really wants to know how green the grass is. We all put on some hoodies and headed the long way around: through the forest. About halfway through the journey, Klaus tried to chicken out. I lit a joint and told him "pussy is meant to be eaten. Not emulated." Everyone except Drew and Darius smoked. Darius gets tested often and weed makes Drew hella paranoid. I wasn't surprised when Klaus fell for the peer pressure. Kid seemed like he needed to prove himself.

The other side isn't any different at first glance. It pretty much mirrors our world. It's not really the place that's different, but the people. They're all a little narrow, shallow, one-sided, etc. Basically, all the movie tropes tore themselves away from the screen and found themselves a home. We're not sure what happened as only government workers and scientists are allowed to cross between sides, all we know is the brief stuff. That their us but different. No one knows the how or the why just the what.

We found a cafe, not as neat as a bar, down the road called Cassie's Cravings. The place was buzzing with convo as we went in. We quickly ordered drinks and took a seat, and waited a while. Waited a long ass while, actually. The boys and I(yes, this includes Maine) played some cards and some fouseball and fucked around till we couldn't anymore. Klaus was actually a cool guy once he calmed the fuck down. Too bad Darius couldn't man up and just ask him out. The amount of bitching about the whole thing Connie did was crazy. The amount of bitching Connie did in general was crazy. In fact, once the boys and I returned to the table we sat at, Connie was-once again-bitching.

"How is it possible that not a single MPDG has walked in yet? We've been here for freaking ages," she whined.

"We've only been here a little under an hour," Drew spoke, surprising all of us.

"Wow, she speaks," Connie said what we were all thinking.

"Yes, yes she does." Drew sat up, filled with Confidence, something I didn't know she could grasp the concept of.

"Aww, isn't this cute. Maine," she stared down Maine,"your shadow's learned a new trick!" This was Connie's way of telling Maine to keep her twin in line. I groaned, knowing exactly where this would lead.

Maine leaned across the table, inches away from Connie's face, and spoke softly,"Suck my dick, Connie."

It didn't take long before Connie was yipping about Maine being a fake feminist and Maine yapping about Connie being an elitist slut. Heads began to turn. I watched as Klaus and Drew recoiled at the scene. Darius did his best to mediate, but only in turn received the wrath of both ladies. I sat back, letting the chaos unfold. There was nothing I could do about it. Entropy, man.

"Excuse me," a warm voice came to the rescue," but I must ask you to-Maine?"

Silence. We all turned to see a flaming redhead with blazing green eyes and killer tats. Her smile could brighten your day and ruin your life.

I looked at Maine, asking her how the fuck she knew this woman.

"Lucinda. Long time no see," Maine turned away from Connie and gave the ginger a hug.

"Um.. what're you doing here?" She started to whisper," You know you can't be here. I thought we talked about this."

Maine smiled, "I was in the area."

The girl, now known as Lucinda, held back whatever she was feeling and instead hugged Maine back,"I miss you."

I'm sure that I miss you was just for Maine, but we almost definitely heard it. And we all most definitely were wondering what the fuck? This bitch was leading a double life without me. I was both impressed and hurt.

"Lucinda, these are my friends, Seth and Darius and Klaus and my twin, Drew, and that," she pointed at Connie "is a Connie. Seth's bitch."

Connie remained silent but burned holes into the side of my head. Oh, I was most definitely gonna pay for that one.

We got to talking and found out that Lucinda was half us half other. She met Maine visiting her dad, which was highly, highly illegal, and they had a summer fling. Technically, she was half MPDG which was good enough for Connie, who took it upon herself to tell Lucinda of our crazy plan.

"We'd be interviewing you and getting your story out there. Maybe if people knew of your situation and how," she paused in her sweet dramatic fashion,"human you are, then they might have a different outlook on the mingling between worlds. Maybe, we could make a difference. No! You could make a difference, what do you say?"

She said yes.

Once she got off work, about an hour later, she took us out on the town. We went to museums and the mall and the park and ended it at some house party her friends were throwing. I respect history as much as the next person, but when it's all the same shit in a new dress, it bores me. So, when we reached this party, I fucking thrived. It was a whole new breed of people that I could fuck with. I was testing new skills and jokes, tips and tricks, and expanding my resume. Shit was amazing.

I used my extensive movie background to try and assign folks to tropes. I smoked with the stoners, played beer pong with jocks, drank with the trust fund babies, and danced with the inbetweeners. By the time we left the party, people were shouting my name! I wanted to stay but Connie got bored and Lucinda got drunk. Like, real drunk.

So, we skedaddled. Drew drove us there in Lucinda's car, so we piled in. Maine said we couldn't take her home, but we could take her to the cabin. Lucinda had told us of the weird side route that was hardly policed. It got us most of the way home, but then we had to walk about a quarter mile back.
I thought we'd done a successful job. Klaus, Darius, and Connie filmed the party, Maine hooked up with Lucinda, and Drew-well, fuck if I know what she did. I most definitely got crazy connections for Maine and I next time we cross the border.

I went upstairs to crash. Connie said she was gonna edit, and Maine said she'd take care of Lucinda.

I fell asleep a king. I woke up to violent screaming.

I ran down stairs and there Lucinda was. Tied up, fear in her eyes. And there Connie and Maine were, filming and laughing. Drew stood at the edge of the room crying. I wasn't sure where Darius and Klaus were. All I knew was that this was some fuck shit I wanted no part of.

I protested like nobody's business, but Connie insisted that it was no big deal;that she wasn't really a person. She was a half person. She was to be documented and then disposed of. I left to smoke and let them finish their psycho little game, hoping it'd done by the time I finished the blunt.

I came back in to see Darius carrying the girl outside. Still no Klaus. Lucinda was limp and bruised. I didn't know what they did to her. Still don't. Don't want to. I waited as Darius and Connie and Maine left to drop her off at home. I sat with a stone cold Drew. We sat there for hours. Nothing but time on our hands.

"What if she dies?" Drew asked.

I didn't have an answer. So I didn't give her one. I just wrapped an arm around her and pulled her in. We fell asleep like this.

The next morning, Connie stormed in covered in mud and off her shit. She dragged Klaus downstairs and made us all promise that "what happend at the Cabin stays at the cabin." She told us Lucinda died in the trunk. She told us that all of us were just as guilty as everyone else and if anyone squealed, we'd all go down. She told us we had ten minutes to get our shit and get in the car. She told us we'd gotten the footage. She told us we'd be famous.
The car ride back to town reeked of silence. I didn't even bother being on Aux. We all were riddled with guilt and the respectful thing to do was to sit in it. At least for a few hours... When it was just Connie and us in the car-right before she dropped me off, I asked her if she felt guilty, if she realized what she'd done to her career.

"Every great politician has a scandal, Seth."

That's all I could hear as I waited to be sentenced. I wanted to know if those were the last things I'd hear her say before I rotted in jail for the rest of my life. The jury didn't take long to deliberate. Ten minutes max. To them, we were spoiled and stuck up kids who took away a life. It didn't help that there was found footage of us drinking and smoking and partying and murdering.

I looked at the six of us and our parents on one side of the courtroom and the whole world on the other. I always thought I'd go down as a robin hood. A vigilante of the people. The kind of person who only ever hurt those who deserved it.

"We, the jury, find the defendant, Seth Candice, guilty of the offense of accomplice to murder."