Her lips curl into a soft smile. She lifts her fingers and waves slowly.

"Hi," I mumbled.

Suddenly I am sinking back into my mute phase. The person I was before Mental Ward Marley. But how much have I changed since then?

Before I though I was going insane. Now I know I am.

"I'm Marley," I whispered.

She nods her head towards a scrap of notebook paper taped to her wall behind her bed. I squinted and read the name Alli scrawled on the crumpled sheet like chicken scratch.

"Alli? Is that your name?"

She nods once.

Then I realize that she's mute. With this sudden epiphany, I relax into my shell and slump onto my bed.

Alli smiled and traced shapes into her bedspread, periodically licking her dry lips and rubbing her hands together.

She catches me staring and I pretend to never have noticed.

Alli opens her hands and claps her fingers to her palm, then taps her wrist. Time? Grab? Schedule.

I handed her the paper and she reads over it, nodding at each line of text. She finishes reading and hands it back with a grin and a thumbs up.

We must have the same schedule, which means we're in the same age group. Sixteen to eighteen.

"Girls?" a muffled voice says. There are two quick, sharp knocks on the door before a nurse steps in.

It's not Myah. This nurse is older and has thin gray hair tied into a tight knot at the nape of her neck. She looks stern and reminds me of Professor Mcgonagall from the Harry Potter series.

"Alli, sweetie, maybe you and Marley should go to the common room. She can make some friends before her first day tomorrow."

Alli groans, a sharp frown etched into her lips. She shakes her head. No.

"Alli," the nurse says in a warning tone. "I think it's a good idea."

Alli clenched her fists and takes a view deep breaths. Then she shakes her head again.

"Fine. Marley, I can take you if you'd like," she suggests.

A part of me wants to go, but a much larger part of me feels as though I'd be betraying Alli by going along. Like I'm a suck up, trying to please the nurse.

I shake my head as well and the nurse sighs before walking back into the hall.

Then Alli starts giggling, which grows into giant guffaws of laughter. Her voice is beautiful. Her mirth travels to me, and I have no idea why she's laughing but I start laughing too. We laugh until we cry and then I wipe away the tears and the gaping hole in my chest shrinks a bit.

I found my Kelly.

•••

Myah pops in with a book (Dumplin' by Julie Murphy because nothing sad or triggering is allowed) and I read until eight o' clock. Alli glances the clock for the billionth time and jumps up, striding towards the door.

I peek at my schedule. Closure group.

I give her a look, which she reads and returns. I guess it's true, about when losing a sense you gain stronger ones, because we have a whole conversation with our eyes.

Do I have to go?

No. But you can. I'll take you.

Is it bad?

Not too bad. Not too good.

Should I go?

Eh.

I'll go.

So I do. I dog-ear my page and hop to my feet. Alli and I march out the door and down our hall. Then we head down Hall 1, which holds the common room and therapy offices and all the recreational stuff.

This feels like school.

Alli leads me to a room that's mostly empty except a circle of about thirty chairs on a blue carpeted floor. She drops into one nearest to the door and I sit next to her. We are the first to arrive besides a man in a white lab coat.

I don't understand why he's wearing a lab coat. It's like he's trying to silently brag about being a doctor. We get it.

The rooms fills up suddenly. Teens with shaggy hair and scabby skin and shaky hands plop into each chair until there's not a single empty seat.

"We're all here! We have someone new here, Marley! Welcome, Marley. I'm so glad you could make it on your first day," the man says.

I stared at my shoes. I could feel their eyes burning through me.

"So!" He claps. "I'm Dr. Matthews. This morning in community group, we all set goals for ourself. We do this every day, Marley. Now, in closure group, we review our goals." He nods at the boy who's picking at an invisible scab on his knee. "How about you go first, Zach?"

"T-this mor-n-ning I s-s-said I wanted t-to-to r-read one hundred p-p-pages of my b-book without being dis-distracted."

I wanted to scream at him. His stuttering was getting annoying. God, I'm a jerk.

I don't belong here. I'm normal.

Aren't I?

"Did you complete that goal?" Dr. Matthews asked in a soothing voice.

"N-no. I couldn't." Zach's eyes dart around the room.

"How can we try better tomorrow?"

"I j-just need to-to f-f-focus."

"Good. Okay, Maria?"

She wont stop touching her hair. She twirls it, twists it around her pinky, braids it and then rips it out, and even brushes it across her lips while talking.

"I wanted to put my hair up and not touch it for at least an hour. I did it." She grins and she looks so pretty in that moment that I smile too.

"Great, Maria! That's awesome! Right, guys?"

A few murmurs of, "Cool, Maria" and "Good job" echo throughout the room.

They keep going around the circle until they reach Alli. Will she talk now?

"Ali's goal was to hang out in the common room for at least an hour. Did you complete it?" Dr. Matthews says.

Alli shook her head but smiled anyway.

"Let's try better tomorrow," he says, not unkindly.

She nods and nudges me in a friendly way.

I smile at her.