Four months ago. July

Kinsley was on the phone after I'd showered and walked out of my bedroom in a pair of sweat pants. She paced the living room in front of the windows, tight little bike shorts hugging her ass.

A new framed photo was hanging above the fire place mantle and I smiled at the selfie we'd taken a week ago while we were cooking in the kitchen together. Kinsley took whatever opportunity she could to teach me a new vegan recipe. The food wasn't bad. I had no idea how many alternatives to meat there were.

"No, because he signed," she snapped in full business mode. She was so damn hot when she got her boss bitch voice on.

"Yeah, no, he can get fucked. We had three different proposals drafted, Hughes went to print and I confirmed it all with him last week. We had it in writing so if he thinks he can back out now, he's got a fucking fee on his hands. It's a complete waste of investors time and money."

While she ripped into whoever was on the other end of the line, I set up the espresso machine and started putting the dishes away. Kins worked hard, she was on the phone a lot and she was good at it, but it stressed her out more than it seemed to bring her happiness.

The phone call went on for a while and when she hung up, she dropped her cell onto the sofa and buried her head in her hands.

"Fucking idiots," she grumbled.

I wandered over, wrapped her in my arms and held her tight. She kissed my bare chest and snuggled in. The things I would do for this woman were endless. Whenever I thought I couldn't fall for her more, I did and I loved her, even though I hadn't said it, I loved her.

"I like that photo," I said, kissing the top of her head.

"What about the plants?"

There was a moment of panic as I scanned the room and then I saw the new plants vining out of the pot and down the shelf on the wall.

"Perfect," I said. "This place has never looked better."

She leaned back and looked up at me. "You don't mind if I do that sort of thing?"

"Do whatever you want around here," I said, my hand running up and down her back, caressing the curve of her ass. I gave it a gentle squeeze. "Move in if you want to."

Her eyes narrowed. "Move in?"

"You're here all the time."

"I have a place," she said. "I have two, sort of."

"If you're not here, you're at Sadie's. You should sell the apartment in Granville."

"No," she pushed herself from me and started picking up her clothes which were draped across the furniture. "I like that place and I might need it in the future."

"For what?"

"For when you get bored and break up with me."

"Are we doing this again?" I followed her as she went into the kitchen, snatched a bag from the cupboard and started shoving her things into it. "Fucks sakes, Kinsley. For someone so sure of herself you have a lot of doubt."

"Yeah, the doubt isn't in me, babe."

That one stung. "Have I done something to make you think I'm not committed?"

"They never do, Phoenix," she looked at me, her cheeks tinged with red and her glare hard. "They just decide to fuck around and leave or cheat, or hit."

"You're using they a lot," I followed her up the corridor and into the bedroom. She made me so fucking mad sometimes but I knew her accusations weren't about me. A person could only take so much betrayal and she'd had her fill. "Who's they? Sure the fuck ain't me, Kins."

The anger radiating from her wasn't anger at all. It was hurt, fear, a wall for her to hide behind.

"I'd be an idiot to sell my apartment," her laugh was bitter. "I'm not going to live with Sadie forever. I'll end up with nothing."

"Move in with me," I said, snatching her bag out of her hand. "Don't sell the apartment, whatever helps you sleep at night. But move in with me."

"Give me that," she went for the bag but I held it above my head and looped the handle onto the light shade.

"Oh, nice," she seethed, hands on her hips. "You're a dick."

She climbed on the unmade bed, the sheets still haphazardly strewn from the morning we spent rolling in them. It was the wrong time for memories of her bent over the side of the mattress to come back. I hid my smile behind my fist as she jumped off the edge and missed the bag.

"You're so cute," I said.

She climbed back on the bed, giving me a withering glare and went to try again. This time, I caught her when she jumped and wrapped her legs around my waist.

"Do you have to be so stubborn?"

Her breathing was hard as she stared at me, lip quivering. It fucking broke my heart.

"I love you, Kinsley Jane Lowe," I swept a hand through her hair, cupped her jaw and brought her face in close. "I love you. I don't know how else to make that clear. You want me to sell this place and move in with you? I'll do it. I'll call the real estate agent right now. I just want you."

The hardness in her expression softened.

"No," she mumbled. "Don't sell this place. It's worth ten times more than mine."

I wasn't going to take it personally that she didn't tell me she loves me back. It'd probably be some time before I heard that from her.

"I'll sort of move in," she said. "Like, I'll bring lots of stuff and be here and whatever. But Sadie has one weekend a month with Lottie and I want to be there for those weekends."

"I can deal with that."

"And I don't pick up after you," she said, her hands finally moving into my hair and lightly scratching, just how I fucking liked it.

"Wouldn't expect it."

"And I want you to do me real good, right now, on the bed."

"Don't have to ask me twice," I threw her into the sheets and stole her giggle with a kiss, my hips lowering and sinking between her spread legs.

The next morning, Kinsley and I hopped out of the truck at Sadie's apartment and I draped an arm around her shoulder. We were picking up a few more things for her to keep at my place.

Our place.

I kissed her head out of sheer excitement and pushed my sunglasses up onto my head. The pavement was bright, reflecting the sun and the smell of warm iron radiated from the gate surrounding the townhouse.

As we went up the doorstep, Kins groaned and held her stomach.

"You okay?" I asked.

"I got my period this morning."

"Aw babe," I said. "At least we know there's no—"

"I fucking swear, Phoenix, I swear if you tell me it's a good thing we're not having a baby, I'll crotch drop you. I'm sore, just feel bad for me instead of looking for the silver lining."

"I do feel bad, I swear, I do."

She sighed, pushing open the front door and kicking off her slides. Inside, we could hear voices echoing in the kitchen, there was a discussion of kindergarten and visitation, a little pink backpack leaned against the hall table where Kins dropped her sunglasses. 

Kinsley stopped when she saw a man standing in the kitchen with Sadie. It had to be Lottie's dad.

"What are you doing here?" Kinsley asked, her voice venomous.

"Dropping my daughter—" he stopped, doing a double take at me. "Wha— you're Phoenix Maverick."

He was pointing at me but looking at the two women. "He is, right?"

"Yeah," Kinsley said, walking over to the fridge. She pulled a water bottle out and unscrewed the cap, staring daggers at this dude. Sadie had busied herself on her cellphone. "And you don't get to talk to him."

Jason recoiled. "Serio—"

"No cheating prick vibes please. That shit might be contagious."

Jason looked smug as his attention moved between Kins and I. "So you're dating a flames player. Interesting."

"And you're dating your hand, Jason," Kinsley said, taking a swig of her drink. "Pathetic."

He glared at her. I was completely obsessed with how she was handling this asshole. But I also wanted to throat punch him when he looked at her like that.

"And if you tell a single person that we're dating," she said, getting up in his face. "I will make sure you can never use your hands to design a single building ever again. Career over."

He swallowed, clearly intimidated at the threat. Man, she was arousing me.

"Alright," Sadie put her phone down and brought the stand off to a stop. "Jason, we'll talk about this later."

"About what?" Kinsley asked.

"Week on, week off," Sadie said, shooing Jason out of the room without touching him. She didn't look at him or get too close. I'd never seen someone move around another person like that. He didn't seem to care.

As Jason passed me, he smiled. It seemed genuine but after all I'd heard from Kinsley, I couldn't find it in me to be polite. I kept my hands in my pockets and didn't return the sentiment.

"Week on, week off?" Kinsley asked her sister when Jason was gone. "You mean he gets her for the entire week?"

"Yeah," Sadie said, sounding tired. "And I will too. It makes our time with her fair. Right now with me getting Lottie during the week and him having weekends, it makes it hard to do things with her when I'm working. Plus, with her starting Kindergarten, it'll mean her week is less disrupted with Jason requesting random pop in visits and hanging out late."

"He only does that because he hopes you'll invite him to sleepover."

Sadie didn't answer, she picked up a basket of laundry and started out of the room. "Oh," she paused. "What are you two doing anyway?"

"I just came to get a few things," Kinsley wandered back to me and tucked herself into my side. "I'm sort of moving in with Phoenix. Kind of."

Sadie clutched her chest, looking genuinely thrilled. "That's so great," she looked at me then, her brow kicked up in amusement. "And don't worry, I know what she means by sort of moving in. Miss commitment issues."

I grinned. "I'm working on it."

Kinsley scoffed and walked up the corridor. Instead of going into her room, she went into Lottie's room and I heard both of them greeting each other, giggling. Their high pitch chatter made me smile as I wandered up the corridor and leaned on the door frame.

Kinsley and Lottie sat on the floor with an etch a sketch between them. Those things were timeless, mom kept them on the back of the front seats when Ashley and I were kids, we could draw during road trips without going through a thousand bits of paper.

"We should go on a vacation," I said. Kins peered up, rolling her nose ring with a raised brow. "All of us. Your sister and Lottie."

Lottie raised her head when she heard her name and watched me with a curious stare. It was blank, but super cute. We hadn't spent a lot of time together and I didn't want to force it and freak her out. It was better if she got used to seeing me around and talked to me when she felt comfortable.

"I had an ad come up for whistler blackcomb ski resort last night. Could be fun."

"I like skiing."

Lottie looked at her aunt. "I like skiing too."

"Do you?!" Kins gasped. "Perfect. Draw someone skiing."

"But I don't know who."

"Anyone," Kins said, tapping the etch a sketch. "Draw Phoenix skiing."

"Who's Phoenix?"

Kins burst into laughter. "The big tall handsome man in the doorframe."

Lottie looked at me with that blank stare again. "He is tall."

"He is. And handsome. Draw him," Kinsley said and when she'd successfully diverted the little girls attention to her drawing, she looked at me. "Skiing sounds good. I'll have to put in leave at work but it shouldn't be a problem."

"I'm in," Sadie shouted from somewhere close.

It made sense to include Kinsley's favourite people in a vacation. Not just so I could get to know them, but so Kins could see that her important people, were important to me too.

I was building a future with her, creating connections and foundations. This wasn't a bit of fun for me and if telling her I love her didn't prove that I was in this for the long haul, I'd do whatever else I could to show her.