[Vent]

So it's somewhat common for peoples personality's to change around different people and groups, right?
(Especially for neurodivergent peeps)

But there's something about myself that I want to understand.

Let's say I'm reading about a character that's confident, sassy, has good style.

I start acting like that.

Not to weird right?

But then, but then... what happens when I watch a crime documentary?...

I can feel empathy for the victim. And even imagine what they felt like and thought...

But then, it gets worse.

I start to get into the villian, bad guy character...

Does that make me crazy? Insane? Dangerous!?

...

I don't know.
Why does this happen?

Why do I get so... into character?...

Sometimes it scares me...

I want to understand this.
I need, to understand this.

What is this!?

...

Who is the "real" me?

Am I actually dangerous?

Do I belong in a psych ward? To be forever locked away?
(Who do I even tell this too!? Strangers? Friends? Family? A therapist?...)

What if I take it to far and- end up behind bars?...

What am I...

***

Am I a monster?

I've had such disturbing thoughts. For years.
Even as a child, they were so dark and mature...

Was it trauma? Or is this part of my genetic makeup?

To be a psycho?
Wtf...

***

What if I'm the bad guy?

Even worse, what if I want, to be the bad guy?...