***

To say that I'm tired is an understatement. I have been spending all my hours helping the soldiers get better. Although it sucks to be this tired, I'm glad that I'm missing out on sleep to do something good. Sleep can wait because this is more important. Besides, I made a promise to myself and Zen that these soldiers would get better. That's why I'm currently cooking some food, a soup, with medicinal herbs in it. This is guaranteed to help improve their health because of the herbs in it. They were actually already so much better which was good.

Shuka brought some potatoes over, setting them on a table with a grunt, "So, what are you making now?"

I stirred the soup, "It's an infusion of medicinal herbs. Do you want to try it?"

"Medicine always makes me throw up!" Shuka shook his head and was waving his hands around wildly. He must really not like medicine then. I don't really blame him. Some medicine taste so bad. I always feel sorry for people when I give them medicine that tastes bad. But you gotta take it in order to get better so you just got to get over the taste.

Thankfully, this one doesn't taste bad. I laughed at his reaction, "It's not that bad."

"No, thanks. Hey, Emiko? I have something to tell you," Shuka started. He sounded serious. I was a bit worried about what he was going to say, but I didn't say anything. He scratched the back of his head, "Thank you for always being so nice to me. And there's something else. Do you think Zen is embarrassed of this outpost?"

I narrowed my eyes in confusion, "What makes you think he would be?"

"I feel like we've disappointed him," He hung his head low, "I'm scared that he won't visit us as often because of it."

"Does he come around here a lot?" I asked.

"Yes, and he spends time with us on his visits. He goes out on patrols, listens to the old soldiers' stories. He even talks to apprentices like me and actually seems to enjoy it," Shuka had a small smile on his face. I could see why he would be worried. He and the other soldiers had a really good relationship with Zen. "We count the days till he comes. I really hope he still wants to see us after all this." Shuka was looking down again.

"You shouldn't worry about it," I did my best to reassure him. "Zen isn't the type of person to just abandon people. He visits because he cares. A little illness would never change him. He might even come more, now!" I gave Shuka a smile.

***

It was a bit later on in the day and I was in the room I had been given at the fort. You would think that I used this time to sleep... But I don't. Though, I really should've. I still have more work to do so I couldn't sleep or nap just yet. I was writing some reports that I had to do for the incident at this fort. My hand was starting to hurt a little from how long and how much I've been writing. I finally got down and when I did, I almost threw my pen down.

I stretched with a big grin on my face, "I'm finally done! I'm glad," I laid my head on the table, "I'm still not completely done, though. I still have to write the reports for my records, check on the medicine, prepare one more batch, and then I..." I trailed off as I felt my eyes slowly close. Maybe a small nap wouldn't hurt.

The door suddenly opened which made me jump up out of my chair. Zen walked in, "Emiko!" He stopped a little bit away from me. 

"Yes?" I inquired.

"Oh, sorry," He apologized, "Were you asleep?" I replied with a 'No,' because I didn't want him to feel bad. I shouldn't have even been trying to nap in the first place. I still got a ton of work to do. "All right. Thought you'd like to see your handiwork." He pointed out the window with a wink.

I gave him a questioning hum. I turned my gaze to look outside the window. There was a group of soldiers shoveling snow. I opened the window and called out to them, "Hey, guys! Are you sure that you're all well enough to be doing that?" They still weren't completely over being sick and being out in the cold weather could make them feel bad again.

One of the older soldiers waved at me, "Yeah! We're doin' great, now!"

"So much better!" A soldier with short hair came into view. He lifted his shovel above his head, "Although, I think I still need routine check-ups for a while!"

"You just want her to take your pulse!" The older soldier exclaimed.

I smiled over at Zen. It was great to see them so lively. Zen came over to the window so they could see him. He yelled, "Wonderful! Prove to her you're well by going back to work!" I laughed.

"Oh! Your Highness!" The older soldier addressed him.

"Please pardon us!" Another soldier said.

Zen looked back at me, "See that? They're looking good, thanks to you. If you can handle it, I'll be back soon!" I nodded. Zen turned and left the room.

"Okay," I let out a deep breath, "I'm gonna start cooking lunch," I went to push in my chair but lost my balance. I quickly caught myself by placing my hands on my desk. I closed my eyes, and I felt my shoulders fall, "I'm so tir- No," I shook my head at myself, "Don't complain. I still got work to do. I can rest later," I grabbed a box that had papers in it and went outside. I had to move them elsewhere for later on. I was walking when the lightheadedness started hitting me again. I stopped and accidentally dropped the box. I looked down at it with an exasperated look, "Dammit."

The papers had spilled out everywhere. I crouched down, putting the papers back in the box. I grabbed the box and prepared myself to stand up. I waited until the feeling of being faint left before picking the box up and standing. I didn't even get a foot away before my eyes closed and I felt myself falling. I felt the feeling of arms catching me. I opened my eyes to see who it was. It was the assassin guy, Obi.

"There goes my job," Obi said.

"This is a nice surprise," I gave him a look of confusion, "Why are you here?"

I stood up straight as Obi took the box from me. He picked up the papers that fell again, "I'm currently serving as Zen's attendant."

"I appreciate the help," I told him. I picked up some of the papers that fell at my feet.

Obi glanced back at me, "I hope that you're not afraid of me."

"No," I mean... He did threaten me, but that was weeks ago. Besides, he was going to be working with Zen now. Zen wouldn't have hired him if he didn't trust him. Anyone that Zen trusts, I trust. Besides, "Why would I be scared of someone that just saved me from a nasty spill? That'd be silly," I took the box from him then started walking away as fast as I could. I couldn't have him asking questions because then he'll probably tell Zen, "I'll see you around."

"Wait a sec. You don't seem like you're feeling very well."

This stopped me from walking. I grimaced. I was hoping that he wouldn't say anything, but... Oh, well. "Please don't say anything."

"I should tell the prince," I could hear a bit of amusement in his voice, "But I won't. Even though he's my boss, not you."

"I guess I owe you one then," I stated.

"Really? It's a deal. But why do you think you need to hide it?" He asked me. I turned my head to look at the soldiers who were a few feet away. They were laughing and trying to get a door open that had been frozen shut. I didn't reply to his question. Obi seemed to notice the soldiers too, "The soldiers seem to be doing better."

"Yeah," I smiled, "And they might start feeling bad again if they're worried about me." I left Obi standing there so I could go to where I was intending to go. I just hope that he didn't say anything to Zen. I don't want him to worry about me.

***

Guess what I was doing? If you guessed doing more reports then you were absolutely right. This was the one thing I didn't like about being a court herbalist. The paperwork was definitely something that I would like to avoid for the rest of my life, but I sadly have to power through it. It's dark outside now and I am even more tired than before. I honestly didn't think that it was possible.

I heard knocking on my door and I turned to see who it was. Zen was standing there in the doorway. He walked in, closing the door behind him. I gave him a smile, "Hey, Zen!"

"Have a seat over here." Zen gestured to the bed. He had a serious look on his face. I wonder what this was about.

"Uh, okay?" It came out as more of a question than a response. I stood up and walked over to the bed, sitting down on it. How I wish that I could just collapse on it and sleep for a year... What am I talking about? I got work to do. I can think about sleep later. "Is this going to take long? I still have some work that I need to do."

Zen pulled a chair by the side of the bed and sat down, "I want you to close your eyes and count to sixty."

This caught me off guard, "What? Are you joking, Zen?"

"No, I'm not," He leaned forward, looking me straight in the eyes. It was kind of intense, not gonna lie, "Close your eyes and don't open them."

"Why do I need to-" I started asking.

"Now!" He exclaimed. He clapped his hands together once, "One!"

"Oh, okay!" I didn't think he was being serious, but I guess he was. I closed my eyes like he had told me to, "My eyes are closed." What was he even doing? I'm beyond confused at this point.

"Two... Thr-" Was the last thing I heard before I fell asleep. The tiredness had finally caught up to me and I couldn't stop myself from falling asleep.

***

I groaned as I slowly opened my eyes. I was laying on my bed and there was something cold on my forehead. I placed my hand on whatever was on my forehead. I grabbed the item and pulled it away to get a look at it. It was a damp cloth. How did I even end up like this? The last thing I remember was Zen counting- This was his plan, wasn't it? He must've figured out that I wasn't sleeping.

Speaking of Zen, I looked over to see him walking toward me. It was the sound of him opening the door that woke me up. "Did I wake you?" Zen's voice was quiet.

I sat up, "It's fine." It was still dark outside. I must not have slept long... Or I slept for a whole day and it's now the next night. If it's the second one then say goodbye to my sleeping schedule.

"I'm sorry I didn't notice you weren't feeling well. I should've seen it. I wasn't paying close enough attention," Zen sat down on the edge of the bed, "But next time, please say something to me. We can always work out a schedule for you that accommodates proper rest," He rested his hand on the back of his neck, "No one needs to handle this kind of situation alone. You can trust me, too. Will you do that? It's only fair."

I nodded, "Of course I will."

"Don't be hard on yourself, either. You may be exhausted now, but that changes nothing. Everyone here was saved thanks to you. I don't believe I've thanked you, yet. I'm so grateful you came to help. Sincerely," I don't know why, but this made me kind of emotional. I was used to Shirayuki telling me this type of stuff, but to have someone else besides her tell me this... It made me feel nice. Zen took one of my hands into his own, "Yes, you came to heal the soldiers, but you also healed me," He brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it. He moved it away, smiling, "You're an inspiration, and now I feel like I can move forward."

I tightened my grip on his hand, "I feel the same way about you. You always seem to inspire me. You make me want to be better and to give more." He's given me the courage to do things that I wouldn't have even dreamed of... He's helped me more than he realizes.

***

It was the next morning and it was now our time to leave. Zen had made me go back to sleep after our talk because I had only slept for an hour or two. He said that I needed to be well-rested for our journey back to the castle. I didn't hesitate to take his advice. I had still been so exhausted, but to a lesser extent since I was able to get some rest. Today's the day that we finally go back home and we say goodbye to the soldiers. Zen, Kiki, Mitsuhide, and I were back on our horses and ready to leave.

"I'm counting on you to be vigilant from now on," Zen stated.

"Yes, sir!" The soldiers said.

Shuka came up to mine and Mitsuhide's horse, "Bye, Emiko! I'll write to you every day!"

"I'll definitely be looking forward to it!" I gave him one last smile. The soldiers shouted and waved to us as the four of us left. I was definitely going to miss them.