"This time around it was a whole different feeling. It had been long since we did that. We ate all the street food we saw. We went to havilah, had ice cream, took a lot of pictures and more."

"We didn't realise it and it was already 5pm. We were all scared and quickly started walking fast. The whether was cloudy and it seemed like it was going to rain so we had to be very fast in what we were doing" She looked at both of her parents scared to say what happened next.

"I'm listening. What next? " Daddy fiercely said.

"Da..daddy I'm.. I'm sorry" She whispered.
"Sorry for what exactly? " Mommy spoke for the first time.

"Tawakkaltu alallah La ilaha illa lah"
Daddy and Mommy got confused. Is she okay?

"As we walked hurriedly, a group of boys approached us, they were holding weapons like axes, guns and cutlasses. We got terrified and started running. They kept following us and I was lucky I found a place to hide" She swallowed hard as she contemplated whether to say what happened or just leave it like that.

"Excuse me" She said and ran out of the room. She went to her room and locked it. She couldn't control her tears.

It all came back rushing.

Flashback

"Saadiya duck down" Hanna, her friend whispered with a shaky voice. She did so immediately and thankfully, none of the boys noticed her.

Saadiya looked around and saw one of the boys holding a long thick stick. She didn't think twice before grabbing a quite heavy and long tree branch she saw beside her. She silently tip toed to where he was standing and hit it on his head. He staggered a bit before landing on the floor.

Her eyes went as wide as saucers when she saw him. It was her neighbor, Hanif. He had come to rescue them.

She quickly dropped the stick and let out a loud shrill. The other boys got alerted and ran away.

She checked his face and noticed that he was bleeding severely. She placed her index finger under his nose to check whether he was breathing or not, and viola, he wasn't.

"Innalillahi wa inna ilayhi raa ji'un" she supplicated and stood up from her kneeling position.

"I've committed....... mur..murder" Saadiya stammered.

"Now the whole world will view me as a murderer,
I killed someone using my hands.
And the person I killed is the one who tried to rescue me
I'll spend the rest of my life in jail."

All these thoughts kept running through her mind. She looked around and noticed that it was raining already. She took it as a clue and got on her heels.

She ran as far as she could. "No one must know that I killed him. Nobody" Saadiya kept chanting as she ran under the heavy rain.

She stumbled a few times but kept running nevertheless. As soon as she sighted her house, she heaved a sigh of relief but still ran as fast as she could.

"Lafiya(is everything okay?)" The gateman asked when he saw how she was knocking the gate. She just looked at him with bloodshot eyes then swiftly dashed into the house.

She got to her room and got out of those clothes. She went to the kitchen and got a pack of matches.

Saadiya dropped the clothes in her room and tried to burn them because she didn't want to keep any memory of that day.

She kept trying but the clothes were wet so she couldn't do anything. She got a pair of scissors and started cutting the clothes.

When they were in pieces, she gathered them and tied them in a polythene bag. She now set the polyethylene bag on fire and watched how it got destroyed.

She smiled in satisfaction thinking that there would be nothing that would remind her of what happened earlier.

Saadiya packed the remains and threw them in the dustbin. She then decided to eat before having a good nap to wash away her stress.

An: Wash away indeed😑😑

She ate her food peacefully and even watched about five episodes of Sponge Bob.

When she was going to bed, she heard the Azhan for Maghreb prayer. Saadiya prayed and waited for her siblings to come back.

When they came back, they talked like every other day and they all later went back to their respective rooms.

That night, marked the beginning of her nightmares. She shrugged it off thinking it was just stress. Little did she know that it was like a lifetime curse.

End of flashback

"I have been such a great fool. I wish I continued going home with the driver. I wish I never enjoyed trekking back home. I wish I didn't follow that route. I wish...."

Knock knock

"Saadiya you better open this door, it's better you tell us now. We might find a solution to this together"

"There's no solution Ya Hanifa"

"At least share it with us, it will reduce the burden on you"

"It won't. It'll just add more problems."

"Saadiya it's an order. Open this door now" ya Hanif said in a strict voice.

"If I tell you what I did will you leave me alone?" Saadiya  grumbled. She got tired of their tantrums.

"Just tell us already" Ya Nana spoke irritatedly

Saadiya kept quiet, contemplating on what to say, or how to say it rather.

"Saadiya?" Ya Nana spoke calmly.

"I killed someone" Saadiya dropped the bomb. She noticed that her siblings were all silent, she moved to the door and opened it.

"What.....what did you just say?" Ya Hafiz whispered.
"You heard me right. I committed murder" Saadiya hugged him and sobbed silently.

She felt ashamed and at the same time a bit relieved. She moved her head from his chest and wiped her tears.

'Since I started this, I have to end it' she thought and smiled sadly at her siblings.

"All those nightmares... and...and sleepless nights I had was due to my actions. I'm so sorry I kept this from you for a long time. I thought I'll be able to deal with it......" Her head collided with the hard floor. She fainted.

"Subhanallah.." Ya Nana picked her up in an attempt to take her out of the room.

(())

"I rushed here immediately I heard the news. Actually there's even a bigger reason to our sudden visit" Hamidah sighed. Ya Hanifa already called her and informed her because she had a feeling that she knew something related to this.

"Do you mind telling us before she regains consciousness?" Mommy glanced at Saadiya who was lying unconsciously on the bed.

"I think it'll be better if you hear it from her because I also don't know the complete story"

"Okay then. Let's wait for her but this thing is really shocking." Mommy stated.

A soft sigh let Saadiya's mouth and they all noticed.

"She's awake" Ya Nana whispered to Daddy while he just nodded.

"Daddy..mommy..Hamida..." She mumbled as she placed her eyes on each of them.

Hamida closed her eyes briefly and nodded at Saadiya with a small smile.
"Saadiya it's now or never. You have to tell them the whole truth" Saadiya just smiled and took a deep breath in and out.

"As I told you, I committed murder, but it was unintentionally. It was a means of defense only" Saadiya recited the magic words before continuing.

She had already made he mind, they'll get to know her reality, and it will be over for both her and her family members. She might go to jail for all she knows and maybe die before that time but she doesn't care as long as she has already confessed her crime.

"You all know Hanif?" She cocked a brow, when she noticed that they were confused, she elaborated. "The one that lived with his parents in the house opposite to our former house?"

"Alhaji Babangida's son right?" She nodded at Ya Hafiz indicating that he was right.

"You also know that he was found dead right? No body knew about his murderer" they all placed their eyes on her, waiting to hear the unexpected.

"Don't tell me it's what I'm thinking" Daddy said furiously

Saadiya sighed and closed her eyes,  but couldn't stop the tears that kept falling.

"I killed Hanif" she exhaled through her mouth and told them every single detail.

Ya Nana couldn't take it and walked out of the room agitatedly. Ya Hafiz followed suit.

Saadiya

I sigh as I noticed the displeasure on Daddy's face. I've brought doom to myself by myself. Now everyone will go away from me. I'm really ashamed, I did this and I'll be the one to rectify it, Insha Allah.

"Daddy.." He didn't even look at my direction and walked away. I felt as if hot melted coal was poured on my heart.

"Mommy... At least you stay with me, I really need you" I say as I break down. I can't comprehend anything.

Mommy walked over and gave me motherly hug. I finally have peace of mind, at least there's someone to clear my tears.

"Seems like you've forgotten about me" Ya Hanifa sniffed and cleared her tears. She walked towards us and hugged me.

"Saadiya I'll always be with you no matter what. It will be fine" I smile, a painful smile.. This is going to be a long journey, but I have my mother and sister with me. We'll overcome it together.

I view Hamida with a small smile on her lips. Great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget. She nod at me with a wider smile exposing her white teeth and mouthed the magic words to me:
"Tawakkaltu alallah, la ilaha illalah"

Who is sensing what's about to happen?
Now that Daddy knows, what will happen? His reaction wasn't friendly at all.

But she has Mommy and Ya Hanifa. We shall see.

Please vote,comment and share.

Amina Hassan❤️