If she had to winnow one more time she'd explode. Water, she needed water. The woman didn't realise that the house of wind and the townhouse were two separate places. The first place she landed in was the townhouse... because apparently, you can't winnow into the house of wind... so many fucking steps. In a last-minute and calculated decision, she decided to go to the townhouse. The dark-haired woman burst through the door and practically ran to the sink, she stuck her head under the tap and started swallowing as much of the liquid gold as possible. When Shaera had got her full she pulled her head back and sighed.... why was the house empty. It's not empty a lot... someone's always lurking. Then she heard it.... moaning. 

"Oh for fuck sake!" She practically screamed and marched back towards the front door and out of it, slamming it behind her.
Then she saw him. Azriel. amusement swirled in his hazel irises 

"Glad you're finding this amusing" she hissed at the Illyrian, he crossed his arms over his chest and leant back against the tree.

"Very amusing-" he hummed and licked his lips. Why has he got to lick his lips in her presence? Now she's looking at his lips.

"-Are you okay Shaera?" Azriel pushed himself off the tree and moved towards her, his eyes scanned her in the process, checking for any injuries. His hand rested on her shoulder

"Tired but fine, why?" Violet danced with Hazel

"You were different." Why'd the man switch so much between physical speech and mental? It disorientated her when he just spoke sometimes and his lips didn't move, she sighed 

"I lose myself sometimes," Shaera moved away from his grasp on her shoulder and turned. She couldn't go into the house. So she'd just go find Tira... or Elain, she hadn't seen the girl in a while, well-spoken to her, they'd sat in each other's company sometimes, especially during the late evenings. Shaera knew the girl found comfort in her company so she'd provide it...Yeah, she'd go find Elain. 

"Shaera-" she paused her departure and turned her head to look at Azriel 

"You can't ignore your problems for eternity" she smiled gently at the man 

"What problems?" Shaera turned and jogged down the street. Now she had to find Elain.

***************
She found the youngest Archeron sat under a tree, no book in sight... just staring at the flowers. Shaera plonked down next to her. The dark-haired woman gently touched the girl's shoulder, Elain snapped her head over to her. 

"Shaera-" the brunette's shoulder slumped in relief. She shuffled closer to the ex-commander.

"You have some blood..." she gestured to Shaera's cheek 

"Oh, it's not mine... the person's not dead" The violet woman panicked in her explanation, Elain shook her head and laughed slightly 

"I won't judge you Shaera" there was a wiseness in the young Archerons eyes, something that wasn't there before. Elain leant her head on Shaera's shoulder. They just sat there. The breeze blew softly through the grass. They just sat there

"How're your visions?" Elain stiffened and sighed her soft brown eyes met violet.

"Worse" Shaera wrapped her arm around Elain and squeezed her arm gently. The girl swallowed 

"What about the voices?" Elain asked, The dark-haired woman chuckled lowly

"Fine" Shaera answered stiffly, Elain stared into nothingness again 

"I want to go home Shaera..." 

"I know-"

"He'll be looking for me... I was meant to marry him next week, I want to go back" Elain turned to look at her, the immortal glow practically radiating off her skin. Shaera didn't know what to say... he was a human... 

"Soon...-" was all she whispered in silence then hung in the air. 

"-Feyre's back..." 

"Oh" Elain frowned 

"Come on, I'll take you back to the house" she released Elain and pulled herself to her feet dusting off her trousers. Shaera held her hand down to Elain. The girl looked up at her 

"What if I don't want to see her Shaera?" The ex-commander crouched down next to her

"At least greet her, she did get you out of Hybern alive, then if you really don't want to stay I'll whisk you away and back to this very tree" She smiled at her softly and Elain nodded, taking her hand. They both stood. She winnowed them both to the townhouse. Once they entered, Shaera's gaze immediately fell onto Nesta who was sat reading. She wore a pewter coloured gown, her hair braided over the crown of her head.

"Hello, Nesta" Shaera spoke dully. Nesta scared the shit out of her if she was honest, her eyes were daggers, her tongue poisonous... The eldest Archeron's eye snapped up to meet hers. 

"Shaera" She knew Nesta hated her, the ex-commander wouldn't be surprised if she woke up one night to the woman holding a knife to her throat ready to end her. Nesta's gaze moved past her and settled on Elain, the harshness simply fell away. She closed her book and stood, stepping slightly towards her youngest sister

"Are you okay?" Elain shrugged and moved past her and towards the door into the sunnier room of the house. Nesta sighed and turned to Shaera 

"I would kill you if you weren't the only person she'll look at... how is she?" Shaera blinked, and Nesta looked at her half pleadingly. The violet-eyed woman bit her lip and sighed
"She's struggling... mortality was good for her" She started towards the door Elain walked through. Nesta's piercing gaze lingered on her a moment longer before she nodded and retreated to her spot by the fire. God she was scary, Shaera was pretty sure she could kill Nesta or at least subdue her...but it didn't make the woman any less terrifying. She walked through the door her violet eyes honed in on Elain sat by the window, staring into nothingness again. Shaera left her to stare. The youngest Archeron loved this human boy, and a war was raging inside her. Sometimes internal wars needed to be fought alone for a short while. Shaera took a spot up the oak table in the room and unsheathed her sword. It was coated in Eris's blood....lovely. The dark-haired woman walked over to one of the velvet curtains and tore a corner off... not her house not her problem. She returned to the table and dipped the material in the water of the flower vase and sat down, starting to clean off her blade. She wiped her face while she was at it. Later, Shaera would have a nice bath and soak in all the oils. She loved baths. Her gaze remained partly on the younger Archeron as she worked, if Lucien came anywhere near her Shaera would chop off his balls. One swift slice.

The door opened, her violet eyes snapped up and rested on Feyre. She could feel the horror emitting from the middle Archeron's skin. Yes, Shaera knew Elain was skinner, and paler, but she couldn't force-feed the girl. The ex-commander watched the brunette eat a small amount of food daily, sleep half, okay, and she made her sit in the sun for any form of exposure to light, if she was really lucky Elain would venture outside for fresh air. 

"Elain?-"Feyre's voice filled the room. Shaera focused back on her blade 

"-I'm back" her voice was weak and unsure 

"I know-"Elain replied bluntly 

"-I want to go home"

"I know" Feyre replied 

"He'll be looking for me" The youngest whispered 

"I know" Feyre repeated 

"We were supposed to be married next week" The middle Archeron put her hand to her chest 

"Elain, I'm sorr-"

"Everyone keeps saying that! But it doesn't fix anything, does it?" Elain hissed her voice nearly matching the poison her eldest sister held. 

"Shaera" Elain whispered in her mind. She heard the call and didn't have to be called twice, the dark-haired woman stood and walked across the room to the young girl's side she placed her hand on the brunette's shoulder. 

"Can we get you anything, Elain?" Rhysand asked, like a true gentleman. Shaera's eyes met Feyre's. The Archeron couldn't understand it. Why Elain found comfort in the woman that worked with the enemy, the enemy that made her immortal. 

"I want to go home" Elain repeated. Feyre turned and walked out. Shaera saw Lucien's red hair in the hallway. One step into the room and he'd be a ball-less man. Everyone seemed to get the hint and left. Shaera sighed and flopped into the chair across from Elain. 

"Do you want to go to the garden?" The dark-haired woman asked, Elain hesitated then shook her head.

"I'll stay here thank you"

"Okay then I'll go get you a snack"

"Shae-"

"Shhh it's going to be a small pastry, you'll enjoy it, I'll be back in about half an hour." Elain stared at her a ghost of a smile graced her lips 

"You sound like a less angry Nesta" Shaera smiled and shook her head, she turned into the chair and grabbed a random book from the shelf nearby. 

"Read this book on..." she turned the cover over 

"Oh look, flowers. Perfect." She dropped the book on the small table between the two chairs. Shaera stood and walked towards the door 

"I'll be back soon" Elain nodded and picked the book up off the table. The violet-eyed woman sighed in relief. Thank god she was doing something besides staring into nothing.

*************
Shaera had to jog out of the house, and winnow to the bakery, Tira was out buying supplies because the shop had peaked in popularity that day, so she bought the last 4 pastries from the young girl's father and then winnowed back to the townhouse. It was tiring.
She was tired. Shaera's brain felt like it was practically throbbing out of her skull. The dark-haired woman kicked open the door and marched in. Lucien was sat up at the table. Nesta was still in the chair, and she only assumed Elain was still in the other room. 

"Got pastries." She stated and plonked two bags on the table for both occupants of that room, then marched on into the next. Her head was fucking hurting. The door was open slightly and Elain was still sat reading, the low glow of the setting sun illuminated her face. 

"Elain eat this" Shaera moved and placed the bag onto the tabletop 

"I'm not hungry" the girl whispered 

"If you don't eat it I'll shove it down your throat" she snapped. Shaera didn't mean to snap, but her head. Elain looked up at her and frowned

"Are you okay?" Shaera grinned tightly 

"I'm Fantastic, now eat" the youngest Archeron picked up the bag and took the pastry out. The girl's eyes lingered for a moment before she started eating the food. Thank the gods. Shaera was happy when the girl took her fourth bite, so she called it a day and left the room with a soft 

"I'll come back later" she needed to lay down, her brain felt like she'd just woken from a thousand late nights. The violet-eyed woman opened the door to her small room and practically dove toward the bed.

**************
Shaera laid there for some time. Her head was engulfed in searing hot pain. Time seemed to slip by. At some point she thought she heard the others come back but who knew. 

"Shaera" it was Rhysand 

"We're having dinner, you're more than welcome to join" Shaera nodded but kept her eyes closed, she waved a dismissive hand towards her brother 

"I'll come in a minute, thank you" The door clicked shut. Fuck. She was hungry, she didn't eat her pastry. Her head was out to kill her. Whispers filled her skull.

"Shaera" angry screams

"Shaera" crashing

"Shaera" Two bodies laid on a stone slab. She couldn't see who they were. It shifted, to the throne room in Hybern, the king was sat on the throne.

"Shaera" he stared right into her soul. Shaera flung herself from the bed. Her head continued to throb. Incoherent whispers continued, she was not staying in the room any longer. The dark-haired woman stumbled towards the door and opened it. Actual voices of people could be heard down the hallway, normal voices, not mysterious whispers. Shaera straightened herself the best she could and walked steadily down the corridor. She rounded the corner to the dining room and set her gaze on the people sat at the table. Rhysand, Mor, Cassian, Azriel, Amren, then the three new occupants, Feyre, Nesta and Lucien

"She's blessed us with her presence" Cassian mused biting into a chicken thigh 

"Oh, so you like me again?" Shaera deadpanned Cassian grinned 

"You sliced Eris good, if Feyre hadn't told us to stop he'd of been torn apart" 

"Your point?" 

"I've decided you're on our side" he finished and slouched further into his chair 

"Good for you" she replied bluntly, the violet-eyed woman didn't feel up for a battle of wits, the weird vision and the voices partnered with her throbbing head drained the hell out of her. Shaera pulled the chair out between Azriel and Morrigan. She didn't know why she decided to sit next to Azriel, maybe her fried brain deep down thought he'd protect her.

"You'll get used to it — the informality" Feyre spoke lowly to Nesta 

"You say that Feyre darling like it's a bad thing," Rhys said as he took some pan-fried trout from the platter before passing it onto his mate. The middle Archeron rolled her eyes 

"It took me by surprise that first dinner we all had, just so you know" 

"Oh, I know" Rhys grinned, Cassian sniggered along with Mor. Feyre turned to Lucien 

"Honestly, Azriel is the only polite one here"  cries of outrage echoed around the space, a ghost of a smile danced on the Shadowsingers lips, he dipped his head and pulled the platter of roast beets sprinkled with goat's cheese towards himself. The brunette snorted 

"Don't even try to pretend that it's not true." Feyre pointed an accusing finger at Mor who smirked 

"Of course it's true, but you needn't make us sound like heathens"

"I would have thought you'd find that term to be a compliment Mor," Rhysand said mildly. Shaera sat watching the exchange between her brother and cousin. She zoned out completely, loud words turned into muted moving lips.

"Shaera"  she was back in the throne room again this time the king was stood in front of her.

"Dagdan and Brannagh are dead" her eyes widened.

"The Archeron killed them both as she fled the court of Spring" his hand gestured to his right, his niece and nephew's body were laid out on a large stone slab. The king moved his left hand so it was holding her chin up to look into his eyes.

"I forgive you Shaera-" he whispered.

"Come home" her mouth opened and closed as his lips met her forehead.

"I need you more than ever" Shaera blinked. She was back up the table

"If Beron or Eris has that information, they'll use it to their advantage in the meeting — to control it. Or control you. Or they might not show up at all, and instead, go right to Hybern" Shaera blinked 

"They wouldn't go to Hybern,-" she spoke lowly, everyone turned to her. 

"-The king will be unapproachable" her voice was laced with malice. She fucking hated Dagdan and Brannagh, they called her a whore, tested her patience every day. But they had fought side by side, they were a unit in battle. And now they were dead gone, two others she knew wiped from existence. 

"It's not like he's approachable any day Shaera" Rhysand mused and put a piece of trout into his mouth. She laughed humourlessly. Her mood had shifted 

"Well seeing as your bitch mate slaughtered his niece and nephew I'll say he's slightly more pissed than usual" she eyes snapped up to Rhysand, violet clashing with violet. Feyre's mouth opened slightly. Everyone sat at the table bristled 

"What your tongue" Rhys growled in his direction. Shaera sneered in return and leant forward 

"What are you going to do Rhysand, throw me in a cell again?" She hissed. 

"Don't tempt me" the High Lord retorted. Azriel tensed. Shaera scoffed and stood from her seat. She grabbed a smaller platter of chicken, roasted vegetables and rice from the table and turned away 

"I'm going to eat with Elain" she whispered and walked out of the dining room and down the hall. She stayed with the young girl for a while, neither talking, Shaera was mostly just making sure the girl ate because it seemed as though no one else in the fucking house cared. The silence was welcoming. She had time to think. Gods, she was going through a mental war, the king played her into his hands. Showing those she knew and worked with; then offering her the position of commander again, giving her a chance to go back to her old home. The times she shared a bed with him felt so long ago, they had a bond and understanding... the others could never know. If they found out about her and Tamlin that would be enough of a shock... but her and the king. That would end her. That's possible the one truth she never wanted anyone to know. She didn't have sex with the King when Tamlin and Lucien were there... Now Brannagh and Dagdan were dead. No one else knew. Shaera sighed through her nostrils and picked up a roasted slice of red pepper.

"You seem upset" Elain spoke up her eyes held concern, Shaera smiled gently and shook her head 

"I'm well Elain, just tired...-" she paused 

"-I'll take this back to the kitchen if you're finished?" 

"Yes, I'm done" the brunette confirmed. The dark-haired woman nodded and picked up the platter. She made her way over to the ajar door and opened it fully with her foot. The hall was dark and quiet, she passed the dining room which too was dark and empty. Shaera turned to the kitchen and placed the platter on the side.

"How did you know about his niece and nephew being dead Shaera?" the moon shone through the window highlighting Azriel's face.

"Shaera come home" the king's voice whispered. She snapped her head in the direction of the archway just past Azriel. The Illyrian frowned and turned around, only to see nothing. She sighed

"I know Rhysand put you up to this Azriel, so fuck off " Shaera moved past the hazel-eyed man, she reached the arch of the door.

"He's speaking to you, isn't he?-"Azriel asked, She froze. They both turned to face each other

"The king" he finished, Shadows danced around his figure. 

"Leave it Azriel" Shaera turned and walked out the door and started down the corridor.
A force pushed her and pinned her to the wall. The breath left his lungs for a moment. Hazel clashed with Violet again. 

"Get off" Shaera growled 

"No-" Azriel practically cut her off, she gaped up at him 

"-You have the king of Hybern slithering around in your mind, you're a danger" 

"What are you going to do lock me away" the dark-haired woman whispered, Azriel's hand cupped the right side of her face, his lips lowered to her left ear 

"I won't let anyone lock you away again" Azriel's breath hit her neck. 

"What about Rhysand?" Azriel faltered and moved away slightly, Shaera chuckled dryly 

"That's what I thought" she shook her head and shoved past the Illyrian, a made her way further down the hall 

"I would kill him..." he whispered, Shaera stopped and turned to face him again, a small chuckle left her lips 

"I would never ask such a thing of you- he's more your brother than he is mine" a coldness crawled up her spine 

"Shaera, don't ignore me" the king's voice pierced her skull again. Someone needed to get that fucking Cauldron away from him. She winced. Azriel was in front of her again.

"You're not sleeping alone tonight" 

"Are you inviting yourself to my bed" 

"No I'm telling you, you're staying in mine" 

"Out of wedlock" Shaera faked a gasp, Azriel just shook his head and he scooped her into his arms.

"Shut up" 

"I can walk" she flopped her head back onto his bicep 

"And I can carry you" Shaera sighed as Azriel started down the hallway, his door matched all the others but when it opened it was definitely the Shadowsinger's room. The floor was dark oak, a rather large bed was in the middle of the room, its intricate headboard pushed against the back wall. From what she could see the sheets were black and... silk?

"I didn't take you for a silk kind of man" Azriel walked over to the bed and practically threw her onto it. The air was knocked out of her for a second, Shaera sat up and looked across the room.
A table sat about 2 meters away from the end of the bed papers sprawled all over it. Azriel moved towards a large oak wardrobe, opened the doors and pulled a large black shirt out. The Illyrian threw it in her direction. The material landed just in front of her. Shaera picked it up. Silk again. 

"Azriel you are a man of many mysteries" Azriel bared his teeth at her and she snorted and pulled her old shirt over her head. Shaera stood from the bed and pulled her pants off, she heard Azriel's sharp intake of breath. 

"There's a changing screen" the dark-haired woman turned towards him.  Azriel kept his eyes connected with her own 

"I have underwear on." she grabbed the silk top and pulled it over her, it reached just past her mid-thigh. It smelt like him. 

"And now I have your shirt on" she smiled and spread her arms out. The Illyrian shook his head and pulled his top off. He turned to her 

"Two can play at that game Shaera" a small smirk taunted her at the corner of his mouth. The moonlight illuminated his bare torso. 

"Oh, so we're playing a game? I was simply getting change Azriel" Shaera faked innocence, flopped back onto his bed and closed her eyes, the cold light of the night sky hit her face. The violet-eyed woman sighed and clenched her eyes shut. A shadow cast over her, she opened her eyes Azriel was above her.

"I'll sleep on the chair" Shaera frowned 

"Don't be ridiculous-" she shuffled over to the left side of the bed and kicked the covers back. Her hand gestured to the right side 

"There's room... but know if I get possessed by the king, you'll be the first dead" Azriel sighed and sat down on the bed then laid back onto the pillow. He still didn't have a shirt on. The hazel-eyed Illyrian looked up at her. Shaera hesitated slightly then laid down next to him. 

"If you're not comfortable Shaera just tell me, the chair's still an option" the ex-commander laughed slightly

"Shush go to sleep" she closed her eyes with a sigh.
Azriel shuffled beside her then stilled. The whispers started again, she tried her best to ignore them.  She eventually fell asleep. A series of dreams and memories plagued her mind.

"And who are you" the king sat upon his throne of bone, Shaera looked up at him... past Shaera

"Shaera Torvarin, my king" She kneeled on the floor

"A soldier in my armies, why have you come here?" The dark-haired woman snorted and met the king's gaze

"What armies?" The man stared down at her

"Your armies are gone, you lack strategy and leadership in your ranks"  the king stood from his throne and descended the steps, his hand came up and lifted her chin.

"And what can you do about that," he asked. She smirked.
**************
She stood by and watched her soldiers descend upon another defenceless town, there was Ghendia, Abarasol and now Yentri. Men grabbed their weapons, women screamed and children sobbed. Shaera watched with a small smirk on her lips. A child ran to her and fell to his knees. Sobs racked his chest

"P-please, help" Shaera knelt and cupped his cheek wiping the tears with her thumb, she slipped a small knife from her boot and handed it to him.

"Help yourself" the boy stared up at her in shock. He backed away from her, horror now engulfing him

"Yo-your doing this" Shaera laughed

"Yes-" an arrow hit just in front of the boy's  feet, he stumbled back, she laughed

"-Run little rabbit" His blue eyes welled with tears as he turned and sprinted away.

*******************
He ran his left hand along her bare torso, his head buried in her neck, leaving peppered kisses as he went. Shaera's breath was hollowed Her gaze connected with the king's, he stared down at her, his eyes filled with lust. She connected her lips to his,  The king's grip tightened on her hips. It was feverish, Love had nothing to do with it. They simply understood each other, Shaera admired the king he was, and at the same time, the King was fascinated by her mind. The spontaneous need for another's touch that night had set in place another century of lust and allegiance.

********************
"Wake up" she groaned 

"Shaera wake up"

Shaera's eyes snapped open. Her vision blurred slightly, she blinked and focused on the Hazel eyes above her. She hummed 

"What?" Concern flooded his eyes 

"You were thrashing around" Shaera blinked and stretched, she was still very much half-asleep

"Ignore me Azriel" she whispered and closed her eyes. She felt the Illyrian hesitantly lay back down. Then she did something conscious Shaera would never have done. She moved into Azriel's warm embrace. Shaera fell into a dreamless sleep this time. Azriel hesitated as the woman curled herself into his side. Yet after his moment of hesitation, he wrapped his arm around her and closed his eyes. It was the best night's sleep both of them had in many years.

————————————————-
4323
Mild Azriel stuff. Be happy. I was going to do nothing at all, but y'all have been here for 12 chapters so I gave you something. Stay tuned for chapter 13!

Edit update: made some stuff slightly longer, fixed some plot holes and ultimately tried to repair my grammar

edited 12th May 2022: It is bordering on 2 am, and mild fatigue is setting in.

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