Song: My Love- Lee Hi (Scarlet Heart Ryeo OST)

Fight

When we got home, my mother immediately enveloped me in a hug. My siblings were happy to see me again and so are my cousins.

"Welcome back, Ate!" Bati sa akin ni Felicity. I smiled at her and hugged her back.

"I didn't know na nakakamiss ka pala kapag wala ka." Ani Gio.

I rolled my eyes at him at niyakap nalang rin siya. Then I turned to Dominic, who shyly smiled at me.

"I'm sorry for-" I cut him off.

"It's okay. Forget it," sabi ko. Nag-angat naman siya ng tingin sa akin at bumuka ang bibig dahil sa gulat. "Come here..."

I spread my arms so I can hug him. Tumawa naman siya at lumapit na sa akin para mayakap. Marami silang sumalubong sa akin. I think, pati ata kapitbahay namin inimbita ni Mommy.

My mother has always been a fan of parties. Gustong-gusto niya ng mga ganito. That's why if someone said she organized a party... expect that she invited everyone.

"Margaux!" Napatigil ako sa pakikipag-usap nang marinig kong isinigaw ang pangalan ko.

Lumingon ako para tingnan kung sino ito. Brittany, my cousin, is running towards me. And when she got nearer, she crashed me into a hug.

"Oh my gosh! I miss you!" She squealed.

Brittany is one of my closest cousin. She's also a doctor but she's still in med school. I think this is her last year in med school. So, it means it's already her internship year.

"Brittany! Oh my god!" Sabi ko when she squeezed me harder para bang miss na miss talaga ako.

They've been living in the States ever since they were kids. Buti nalang rin at marunong pang mag-tagalog.

"Gosh! I can't believe you agreed to go to Afghanistan! If I were you, I would be so scared! Like... gosh! How can you even survive that country? It's scary!" She rolled her eyes at me. Tumawa naman ako.

She's a spoiled brat. Pero kahit na ganoon siya, she's really fun to be with.

Naputol lamang ang usapan namin nang may biglang magsalita galing sa likuran namin. Brittany rolled her eyes.

"Nag-sama na naman ang dalawa..." Ani Benj, Brittany's brother. I turned to him and smiled.

"Benjamin!"

"Welcome back, Margaux!" Then he hugged me after that.

"Thanks for ruining our conversation, Benjamin!" Reklamo ni Brittany. She crossed her arms and rolled her eyes again. Tumawa lang si Benj at hindi na pinansin ang kapatid.

"How's Afghanistan?" He asked. Bago pa ako makasagot ay nagsalita na si Brittany.

"Why would you even ask that?! You know the answer to that! It's scary! Right, Margaux?" Brittany interrupted.

"It was fun," sabi ko. Brittany's jaw dropped.

"How can you even!? How is it fun!? You are surrounded by terrorist and you call it fun?" She shook her head. Hindi makapaniwala na sinabi kong masaya sa Afghanistan.

"Oh! Shut up, Paris! Margaux has her own ways of fun! And it's far from yours!" this time his brother rolled his eyes.

Brittany groaned in annoyance. "Ugh! Don't call me Paris, Antonio!"

"And don't call me Antonio, too! Such an ugly name." His sister laughed.

"Well, at least Paris is pretty." She mocked at him.

Umiling nalang ako at iniwan na ang dalawang nagbabangayan na magkapatid. I head over to the buffet table para kumuha ng pagkain. I was busy choosing my food nang may biglang sumigaw na naman ng pangalan ko.

"Margaux!"

I sighed. Why is everybody shouting my name!? Hindi ba pwedeng lumapit nalang sila sa akin at kausapin ako?

Lumingon ako at nakita kong tumatakbo si Ethan papunta sa akin. My eyes widened to see him here.

"You're here?!" I asked.

"Well..." He shrugged his shoulders boyishly. "Your mom invited us. My family is over there." He pointed at the couple of people who's talking to my parents.

Told you, Mom invited everyone.

I joined their table at lumingon naman agad sila sa akin at kay Ethan.

"Look at our kids! They are really brave to join the army's mission!" Sabi ng mommy ni Ethan.

"I know! I can't believe my daughter agreed to that! Siguro ay nakuha niya ang katapangan niya sa daddy niya." Si Mommy. She rests her head on Dad's shoulder. Habang si Daddy naman ay uniinom ng kanyang paboritong whiskey.

"We shouldn't have joined this table." Ethan whispered.

"I know. It was your idea and now you regret it." I whispered back.

After that, our parents let us drink alcohol. Brittany and Benjamin shouted with joy. Everyone rolled their eyes nang sumigaw ang dalawa.

Kapag talaga ganito, silang dalawa ang madalas na matuwa. Sometimes they will dance kahit hindi pa naman naguumpisa ang inuman. It's their way of showing their happiness that they're going to drink again.

Brittanny sat beside me and next to me is Aiden who just arrived.

"Where's Ana?" I asked. Hindi ko kasi nakita ang asawa niya dito. Normally kapag may ganito, lagi niyang isinasama iyon pati ang first born nila. And it's shocking not to see them here!

"Ana just gave birth. Told her to just stay at home." he said.

Oh! Naalala ko na bago kami magpunta sa Afghanistan his wife is pregnant with their second child! Ilang weeks palang ata siyang buntis noon at ngayon nabalitaan kong nanganak na siya!

Ang bilis talaga ng panahon!

"Oh! What's the name?" I asked. Natutuwa na may nadagdag na naman sa aming pamilya.

"Vincent," he replied.

"Another boy?!" I rolled my eyes. Everyone is expecting a girl! Hindi naman sa ayaw namin sa pangalawang anak nila... but everyone is really expecting a girl!

Lalo na ako! I wanted a baby girl!

"We'll try again. Hanggang sa makabuo kami ng babae." I rolled my eyes.

Benjamin opened all the bottles for us. Siya na rin ang nagbigay sa amin isa-isa ng mga beer.

"Happy drinking!" Benj raised his glass. Ganoon rin ang ginawa namin.

"Happy drinking!" Sabay sabay naming isinigaw.

Kumpleto ang lahat maliban kay Dominic at Felicity. They're still minors kaya nandoon sila at tinatanaw lang kaming lahat. Well, Dominic will turn eighteen next year kaya pwede na siyang sumama sa amin. But in Felicity's case, she has to wait for another three years before she can join us.

Masaya kaming nag-iinuman at nagkukwentuhan hanggang sa natahimik ang lahat dahil sa mga bagong dating.

"Oh my gosh!" Brittany squealed with the sight of the group of men who just entered our back garden.

It's odd that I don't see them wearing their military uniform right now. Dahil sa sampung buwan na kasama ko sila, 'yun lang ang laging suot nila. At hindi rin ako sanay na makita siyang ganito ang suot. He's wearing a white polo at nakatupi ito hanggang sa kanyang siko. He's infront of everyone else. Ang iba ay nakasunod lang sakanya.

They all saluted to my father na sinalubong sila sa bukana ng back garden. Tahimik ko lang siyang sinundan ng tingin. He still hasn't seen me yet.

O di kaya, nakita na niya ako but he chose not to acknowledge my presence? Wow!

I saw my father chuckled at ipinababa ang kanilang mga kamay. Tama nga naman siya, they're off duty so it is unnecessary to salute at him.

Gulat na gulat naman akong nilingon ni Brittany na kanina pa sila tinitingnan. I raised my brow at her asking what is her problem.

"Are those the soldiers you're with?!" Naeexcite na tanong ni Brittany sa akin. I nodded at tsaka uminom ng alak.

She squeals again at niyugyog ako. "How did you last ten months without falling in love with any of them? I mean, they're all hot." Nilakihan niya ako ng mata at ibinaling muli ang tingin sa mga sundalo.

"Especially that guy in white polo. Daaaamn!" She pointed at Jaxon at nilingon muli ito. I bit my lip to stop myself from speaking.

You have no idea.

Bigla namang nag-init ang pakiramdam ko. Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba suot ko parin ang coat ko o sadyang nakakainit lang ng pakiramdam ng pagdating nila dito?

I removed my coat at ipinatong ito sa likod ng upuan ko. I brought my beer back to my lips at handa nang uminom nang bigla na namang sumigaw itong katabi ko.

Seriously? When will she stop screaming? Mabibingi na ako sakanya!

Everyone turn their heads at her. Kahit ata 'yung mga bagong dating napatigin sakanya. Is this her way to get their attention or what?

Nang lingunin ko siya ay nakita kong nakatingin na siya sa balikat ko. My eyes widened. Oh my god! I forgot.

She saw it!

"You got shot?!" Malakas niyang sinabi kaya lahat ay nagulat. Now, everybody's attention is on me.

"What?!"

"Margaux, you got shot?"

Sabay sabay nilang tinanong sa akin. Tinakpan ko naman ang aking balikat gamit ang aking kamay. I should've worn a t-shirt or something. Hindi itong off-shoulder shirt na suot ko ngayon.

Very nice, Margaux. Very nice.

Ang katabi kong si Aiden ay tiningnan na rin ito. Nagaalala siyang tumingin sa akin.

"It wasn't from a gunshot!" I reasoned out. Pero hindi sila naniniwala sa akin. Lalo na si Brittanny.

"Oh! Don't fool me, Margaux! I'm studying medicine and I know the different kinds of scar. And that one... clearly comes from a gunshot!" Umiling siya sa akin.

"When did that happen, Ate?" Gio asked.

Okay... First of all, wala ni isa sakanila ang nakakaalam tungkol dito. I told everyone not to mention it to my parents lalo na kay Daddy. Ayokong mag-isip pa sila. I had to talk to a lot of soldiers para lang hindi maipaalam kay Daddy ang tungkol sa nangyari. And thank goodness dahil hindi iyon nakarating sakanila.

And now, because of a very careless decision... They already know! And it was because of my cousin who just can't seem to shut up her mouth.

Lahat ay natahimik at naghihintay na magsalita ako at sabihin ang tungkol sa nangyari. Inikot ko ang mata ko sa paligid. They're all looking at me. It freaks me out. Talagang hinihintay nila ang isasagot ko.

I opened my mouth to say something but I was interrupted when someone clapped his hands. Lahat na ng atensyon ngayon ay nasa kanya.

Ethan stood up and clapped his hands slowly. He's shaking his head while doing it. Nilakihan ko siya ng mata. What is he doing?

"That... was an act of bravery," he pointed at me. Kumunot naman ang noo ko.

Okay... What is he up to?

"She got shot because she's brave. And you normally don't see a woman like that!" he clapped his hands again. I stood up at lumapit sakanya.

"Ethan, what are you doing?" I hissed at him. Nilingon niya ako at may binulong.

"Just get along with it, Margaux. Your father is scaring the shit out of me." He whispered. Hinanap naman agad ng mata ko si Daddy.

I saw him beside Jaxon. And they're looking at us seriously. Lalo na si Daddy. I gulped. Lagot na naman ako nito. I opened my mouth to interrupt him. Pero naunahan niya ako nang ilagay niya ang kanyang kamay sa aking balikat.

"And don't worry... She's fine... She's fine." His tone is full of assurance. Just like how he assures his patients. "And she saved a lot of lives after that." Ethan smiled at everyone. "Can't we just appreciate Margaux's act of bravery? She deserves it."

Marami naman ang tumango at sa huli ay pumalakpak rin. Even my cousins. Ang bilis rin nilang mauto. Ganoon na rin ang ginawa ni Ethan. At nang lumingon sa akin ay nilakihan niya ako ng mata.

"You... are so dead." He hissed and shook his head. Binalik niyang muli ang tingin sa lahat at pinagpatuloy ang ginagawa.

Matapos noon ay bumalik na kaming muli sa ginagawa. Everyone is suddenly over it. I'm relieved. Kung magpapatuloy pa silang magtanong mas malalagot ako ng husto kay Daddy.

I silently drank my beer habang tinitingnan ang mga pinsan ko na lasing na. Brittany is silently giggling beside me at hindi ko alam kung bakit. While Benjamin... well, he's smiling at the beer in front of him. He's crazy.

Aiden has a high tolerance with alcoholic drinks kaya hindi pa siya tinatamaan kahit na nakailan na siya. Umuwi na rin si Ethan at ang pamilya niya. Bukas na bukas rin ay babalik na ulit kami sa hospital.

Here comes another fourty-eight hour shift! Nice.

And Gio, he left us dahil gusto na daw niyang matulog. Aiden and I are the only one's left because these two are clearly drunk. At hindi mo na sila makakausap ng matino.

The soldiers are still here. Tanaw na tanaw ko sila dito sa pwesto ko. Lalo na siya. They're also doing what we are doing. My mother was the one who offered them the beer. Noong una, ayaw pa nilang tanggapin. Pero sa huli ay bumigay rin. Namiss siguro ng mga 'to na uminom.

I watched Jaxon as he brought his beer to his mouth. I did the same. Hinihintay na tumingin naman siya sa gawi ko. But it never happened. Hintay ako ng hintay pero hindi nangyari.

Maybe he never really loved me. Kasi ako lang naman ang nagsasabi sa sarili ko nun, e. He never told anything about his feelings for me. Siguro, kung ano mang nangyari sa amin noon. It's purely because of lust.

Hindi ko masabi na pinapaasa niya lang ako. Because he didn't give me any motives. Except when he kisses me. 'Yun lang.

Siguro nga hindi niya ako pinapaasa. Kasi... ako mismo ang nagpapaasa sa sarili ko. Pinapaasa ko ang sarili ko by telling myself that he feels the same kahit hindi naman niya sinasabi sa akin.

He wasn't the one hurting me. I was the one hurting myself by telling all these things. I am holding onto something that isn't even there. Clinging into it even though I know it's not real and never will be.

"You're looking at him like you're in love with him." Nawala ang tingin ko kay Jaxon nang biglang magsalita si Aiden sa gilid ko. I turned to him.

"That guy," he pointed at him. "You keep on looking at him. Kanina ko pa napapansin." Hindi ako nagsalita at uminom nalang ng alak.

"Do you?" He asks again.

"What?"

"Love him?" I tore my eyes away from him. I licked my lips and breathed.

"I do." I admitted. I was expecting him to get shock with what I just said, but surprisingly, he's not. Tumango lamang siya at ngumisi.

"Did you tell him?"

"Yeah," isinandal ko naman ang sarili ko sa upuan at inubos na ang laman ng bote na hawak ko. Pagkatapos nun ay kumuha ako ng bago.

"What did he say?" I smiled a little. Pero sa likod ng ngiti na iyon ay ang isang pusong nagdurugo.

"Nothing." I whispered.

I heard Aiden chuckled lightly. Nilingon ko siya at tiningnan ng masama.

"It's not funny." I groaned.

"I'm not laughing because he didn't say he loves you back," aniya. "I'm laughing because he's a coward."

"He's not." I defended Jaxon. Mas tumawa naman ngayon si Aiden.

"He is!"

"He's not..."

"Just admit it. He is."

"Maybe he thinks that we will not work out that's why he chose not to say it to me. Or chose not to feel it towards me."

Pinaglaruan ko naman ang bote na hawak ko. Pinagmamasdan ang laman nito. Hoping that this will divert my attention to something else.

"Oh, it isn't like that, Margaux. Everything works out, you know? You will work out if you choose to work out. That's what happened between Ana and I. I fought for her even though everyone thinks I shouldn't. And that's what you should do, too."

Hindi ako sumagot kaya nagpatuloy siya.

"The Donovan's don't give up on love. They fight for it." He whispered.

Yeah. Everyone from my family fights for their one true love. Except for me. Because I'm too weak to even fight for it. Maybe I think I can, but in reality, I can't.

"But what if he doesn't fight for me?" I asked. Matagal bago siya mag-salita.

"Then you have to let go. You don't have to push yourself to the person who can't even fight for you. You deserve someone more than that, Margaux. Do not settle for less."