"Missing you comes in waves, and tonight, I'm drowning."
~Chris Young

Spencer

Elsa smiled back at me, but it couldn't hide her pain, and my heart constricted. My chest had ached all day, sharp pain sporadically shooting through it. If I hadn't known it was my panic, I would've been freaking out. Dom kept me calm for most of the day. However, seeing Elsa now, I had no ability to stay that way.

She wore a long-sleeved, white lace dress with an open back and black lace heels. They had a red sole, and I wondered if those were the shoes she had been telling me about the other day. Her hair, like always, was curled, but it was pulled back into a half do. My mind flashed back our night together, of me running my hands through her soft curls, of how I wanted to do that again, over and over.

I flushed at the memory, hoping anyone who saw me would just think I was hot...

Dom made his way down the aisle, taking his place next to me as my Best Man. He adjusted his cuffs as he said quietly, "You going to be able to do this?"

"I have to," I responded. "It's my duty."

"You haven't stopped looking over at her. Ren and Arya are getting suspicious."

"Shit..." I mumbled, turning my back on the crowd in an attempt to force myself not to look at Elsa.

"Don't worry; she can't stop looking at you either."

I was about to make a retort when everyone fell silent. I faced the aisle just as the music started up. Dom and Brian slipped away to the back of the room so they could escort the bridesmaids down the aisle.

The doors to the room opened up, revealing Rey. She looped her arm through Dom's and walked down the aisle with him, smiling at everyone as she passed. Rey had always been more tomboy but had a natural beauty to her that made other girls envious. In her red bridesmaid gown, she looked stunning.

Next was Lily and Brian. My sister had always been confident and proud, but today, strangely, she appeared nervous and shy as she walked up to me. I couldn't figure out why, but I intended to find out after the wedding.

Lastly came Callie on her father's arm. Her dress was extravagant, although I don't know what else I expected. It was a strapless ball gown with a crystal-encrusted top half and a tulle and lace bottom half with crystals placed sporadically all over it. She shimmered and sparkled underneath the lights. I heard mom and Natalie gasp and saw tears welling in their eyes.

Callie beamed at me as she and her father stopped in front of the altar. The minister began his speech. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness the union of Spencer Stark and Callie O'Connor in holy matrimony, which is an honorable estate that is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently and soberly."

I bit back a laugh at the irony of the last statement considering this entire marriage was being forced. Still, I kept my composure, focusing on Callie, forcing myself not to look at the girl I really wanted to marry.

"Into this estate," the minister continued, "these two persons present come now to be joined. If anyone can show just cause why they may not be lawfully joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace."

The room was silent, but I could feel my own tension, praying someone would speak up on mine and Callie's behalf, saying we didn't deserve this, that we deserved to marry someone we chose.

Unable to help myself, I looked up to see Elsa. Her head hung low, hands folded in her lap. Even from here, I could see her trembling. A knot formed in my throat, one that had intermittently come and gone throughout the day, but now seemed lodged permanently.

I should be marrying her.

I should be marrying her.

I should be marrying her.

The sentence wouldn't stop repeating in my head, making it difficult for me to maintain my concentration.

"Who gives this woman to be married to this man?" the minister asked.

"My wife and I do," James spoke up, handing Callie over to me. He hugged me before taking his spot next to his wife. Natalie took his hand in hers, tears of joy silently falling down her cheeks.

"Callie, you have something you would like to read?" the minister asked.

"I do," she replied. Smiling at me, she began, "Spencer, I've known you all my life. I've grown up with you, I've seen you turn from a boy into a man, and I've seen you become the leader that you are. Our relationship has been through a lot of difficult times because of our profession. I know there are more challenges to come, but I believe that as long as we're together, we can overcome anything. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you, and I hope I make you as happy as you have always made me. I love you."

I froze at the words, never having heard them come out of her mouth. I didn't have anything rehearsed like she did, but I needed to say something. I had to say something.

"Minister, may I speak as well?" I requested, interrupting the beginning of the vows. He seemed surprised but consented. "Callie, you're not the only one who saw me transform. I watched you turn from a girl into a woman, and in that time, never did you lose your fiery spirit and determination. You're right, we've been through a lot, and I know I haven't always been the easiest person to deal with. I'm stubborn and annoying and let's face it, a bit idiotic. You're a great person with a huge heart who would do whatever she needed to for her pack. You deserve a guy who can give you everything you need and want, and I'm not that man."

A collective gasp went around the room. Callie's eyes widened as she realized what I was doing. Kissing her on the cheek, I pulled myself away from her, going down the steps of the altar.

"Spencer-" Mom started, standing up as if she meant to block my path, but I cut her off with a firm, "Enough."

I locked eyes with Elsa, who stared at me in disbelief, her eye color shifting from sapphire to Cerulean as she registered what I was doing. As I approached her, she stood up. Ignoring the death glares and shocked stares, I pulled her face towards mine, and knowing there was no turning back from this, kissed her in front of everyone there.

Starks, Laroches, I didn't care who knew.

I was in love with Elsa, and I wasn't going to marry anyone I didn't want to.