"Bad memories are like splinters. Sometimes painful, but you learn to live with them. The problem is, they always work their way to the surface eventually."

************

Nikolas's POV

Do I like having Natalie back in my house? Yes, of course.

Do I like that she is ignoring me? Not really.

Do I like that her stupid cat never leaves my side? Fucking hell no.

I glared at the thing as it snuggled closer to me, laying its little furry head over my lap before she fell fast asleep. I rolled my eyes and resisted the urge to open the door and throw her outside, maybe then Natalie would just talk to me, shout at me and stop pretending that I don't exist.

The low creaking sound of a door grabbed my attention away from the little monster, my eyes flickering to the other end of the hallway, the mirror positioned on the wall reflected the scene from across, giving me a slight view of the guest room. Natalie popped her head out, her gaze drifting left and right, checking if I was near before she'd decide whether it was safe to step out or not.

Sensing her hesitation, I found myself speaking, "You can come out, I don't bite," My voice startled her. Her wide eyes flickered around, meeting mine through the mirror before she stepped out of the room. With hesitant footsteps, she inched closer till she fully came into view.

Her eyes fell on me, then drifted to her little monster sleeping and all plastered to my side, "Uh, I was just looking for her," She mumbled, addressing the cat. She tucked her hair behind her ear, a bit nervous as if I wasn't the same man she had slept beside before, been in his arms and kissed uncountable times. Almost like I was back to being only a stranger to her.

God, I am just finding it really hard to adjust to this Natalie.

My jaw worked and my eyebrow raised as I looked down at the cat, "Well, where else would she be," I mumbled, a bit of annoyance flared in my tone, and that had Natalie's lips slightly twitch but the second she realized that, she masked it away.

Her throat bobbed before her eyes flickered around, fishing for a conversation to cover her nervousness, "Is Ronald here?"

I shook my head, "No, he went out."

Lines etched between her eyebrows, "Where to?"

My eyebrow raised, "Is he my wife? Should I know all of his whereabouts?" It's enough that I am letting him stay here for her sake. Let's not stretch it.

She pressed her lips into a thin line and shook her head. She shifted on her feet after, rubbing a hand over her arm, her eyes going around, probably wanting to escape back into the room but just doesn't know how.

"Sit down," I grumbled out, because she can't just unbear my presence all of a sudden. Her eyes fell on mine, taken aback by my tone and I corrected my words, clearing my throat as I added, "I mean, are you gonna keep standing?" I suggested, "Just sit down."

When she didn't move, I added, "I can leave if you want-" My jaw ticked; apparently, I am not even welcomed in my own house anymore.

Her eyes slightly grew wide and she shook her head, "No, uh," She edged closer and sat on the same couch as mine, just at the very far end. The stupid cat stirred at the movement, she raised her head up and looked around. Finding nothing interesting, she snuggled closer to me again and went back to sleep.

I ignored her and focused on my delicate girl, who looked one step away from breaking down again. Her tired eyes, the ones that I am sure cried some more, they tugged at my chest, "You couldn't sleep?" I asked, my tone turning a bit softer, wanting her to talk to me, needing to hear her voice. I just wanted my full-of-life Natalie back; where did she suddenly disappear into?

She shook her head, "No," She whispered, looking down at her lap, anxiously fidgeting with the hem of her t-shirt, "I kept thinking about what you said," She added and I really wished just to go back and not have me spit the truth in her face, she was better off thinking her mother's death was a mere accident.

She lifted her teary eyes up, they met mine and I wanted nothing more than to gather her in my arms but that energy vibrating from her still kept me frozen in my spot. It felt like she needed everyone but me at this moment of weakness and I hated it, I hated it more than I could put into words.

"Can you tell me more, please?" She mumbled, her lower lip quivering but she tried to keep herself intact. She rushed a hand over her face, stopping the tears, she sniffled and added, "My mind won't rest till I know exactly what happened."

I hesitated a bit at first but maybe the truth could give her a bit of peace so I spoke. I let out a loud breath before I started to explain, "Your mother's last name is Armone, which is one of the top families in the Sicilian Mafia," My words etched lines over her forehead and she shook her head, not willing to adjust to this fact yet, "But...but she never told us anything about that-"

I nodded, "She was just protecting you, she ran away from that life for a reason," I added and Natalie listened. She wrapped her arms around herself, indirectly stopping herself from breaking all over the place, "Your uncle-" I started to say but she shook her head furiously, "Don't call him that-" She mumbled, her tone defensive, refusing to be related to the man at all.

"He was the one you saw back in London," I explained and lines etched her forehead, she straightened her body and recognition flashed all over her face as she connected the dots together, "That...that Joseph man, isn't it?" She asked, bitterness wove in her voice and I nodded.

"It's why you were trying to hide me away from him?" She whispered and for the first time today, a bit of softness crossed her expression, she looked at me just like my Natalie always stared back at me, with uttermost trust and affection. Before I could seek some comfort from that lenient look, it disappeared and she drifted her gaze away from me, shaking herself back in.

"It was only a matter of time before he was going to figure out who you are," I explained and she kept looking down at her lap, her fingers twisting the fabric of her sweater. When she faced me again, anger and fear got tangled up in her messy gaze, "He caused the car accident?"

She knew the answer but I gave it to her and nodded my head, giving her the bitterest of truths, "But your mother...she survived the accident," My words twisted her expression, unable to keep the strong act for too long and her lips quivered again, the first tear falling down as she hoarsely whispered, "So he...he killed her?" It was more of a statement than a question.

My jaw tightened and I nodded my head again. I am going to fucking ruin him for this, specifically for those tears flickering down her face, for daring to think he can touch or hurt her. More tears went down and I couldn't just sit still and watch her break down in front of me, she covered her face, crying into her hands, "Oh god, how could he-" She mumbled, her voice muffled, raw agony twisted her hoarse words, "She was-" She hiccuped a low sob as she added, "She was pregnant, how could he-"

The truth behind her words had me bite the inside of my cheek, stopping myself from telling her just everything. I wanted to but couldn't just yet. The fewer people that knew, the lower the possibility of Isaac figuring it out. I can't risk it. Nathan is my only winning ticket at the moment. Isaac's rattled-out state was enough proof of that. I can't afford to lose that.

Maybe I do deserve Natalie's current distaste toward me, because I was still cooking up twisted dirty games behind her back, things that related to her on a very close level. It's one of my many bad traits; when I set my mind on something, I will do it and end it at all costs. When I start a plan, I won't stop until I see it all go through. Even if it meant crossing boundaries and stepping over morals.

I meant what I said to Isaac, getting rid of him is my priority, nothing will ever beat that. Nothing is more important, nothing should ever be more important. But the longer I stared at her weak state, the way her shoulders shook, her low sniffles and tears, the clearer I understood how I was merely lying to myself. She was so important too, she was a priority too. I know that I shouldn't let her have that much restraint over me, but it was beyond my control anymore.

I pushed the stupid cat away, it shrieked in annoyance and jumped off the couch, allowing me to inch closer to Natalie. My arms went around her frail body, wrapping her whole and pulling her trembling self into my chest. She sank into my embrace like she was waiting for it, pressing herself closer, desperately needing something to hold into, her little fists clutched into my t-shirt, soaking it with her tears.

My jaw tightened and I pressed my eyes shut, my hand cradled the back of her head, my chin pressing over the top of her head as I grated out, "He will pay for everything," And that he will.

She hiccuped a sob, sniffling and I ran my hand through her hair, hoping to soothe her down in any way I can. My lips parted, it was on the tip of my tongue, Nathan's name, ready to say it out loud and offer her a bit of good news within this messy situation, but I stopped myself, forced my mouth shut, and tightened my hold around her.

Right then, I heard the main door open. An annoyed breath pushed off my lungs as his footsteps got closer. Natalie noticed that too and got back to herself, abruptly pulling her head off my chest, her eyes flickered up to me before they quickly went to the room's entrance. Ronald paused in his steps when his eyes found us. He rolled his eyes, murmuring something under his breath as he crossed his arms over his chest, irritation flowing off him in waves and I shot him a hard glare.

I just hate him too much.

Natalie pushed herself out of my embrace, rather harshly, trying to pry me away and prevent any contact between our skins. Taken aback by the sudden change in her act, I loosened my arms, allowing her to jump off the couch and to her feet, "I better go to bed," She mumbled hoarsely, her voice low and tight, trying to run away for some reason.

I stared up at her, my jaw moving in distress and my hand fisted over the couch, forcing myself to calm as she mumbled a low goodnight for both of us and scurried away to her room, the little monster following her along, it got inside the room as well and she shut the door close. Locking it. Keeping the actual monster away.

Hefting out a low breath, I straightened myself and got up. I moved out of the living room, my shoulder harshly pushing against Ronald's as I stepped out. "He...hey!" He shot out at my harsh movement, and how it almost knocked him backward. He straightened himself as I paused and gave him a very bored look, "Where will I sleep?" He grumbled and I casually pointed at the couch, "There."

He looked there then back at me, shaking his head in refusal, "What...no," He shook his head again, "No, you have many spare rooms in this house," He stated and I nodded, "Yeah, one is not furnished yet," I added and his eyebrow raised, "What about the other one?"

I shot him a hard glare, my tone harsh, "My mother stayed in that room, don't think you will as much step inside it."

My tone had him shut up, knowing he can't win this argument. He sighed in frustration and started back at the couch, "Damn it," He hissed under his breath, moving closer and slumping over it, hating this more than anything and that gave me a bit of satisfaction.

I ignored him after and got up the stairs, pausing by my room's door as my eyes flickered to the one at the end of the hall. A weird tightness pressed my chest and without thinking it through, I made my way toward it, pausing only when I was at its limit. My hand went up, wrapping over the cold knob, twisting it, and slowly pushing the door open.

My hand reached for the switch, turning the lights on, illuminating the room and I blinked, sucking into a deep breath to calm my tensed nerves. She was the last one to occupy this room, and since that day, no one had stepped inside, and neither did I. For god's sake, I haven't been able to gather the courage to read the letter she left behind. I still didn't even give Alex his own.

Knowing I would only be opening wounds I can't mend, I turned off the lights and stepped back. I closed the door and walked away, not ready to come to terms with her absence all over again. Her scent was still hanging in the air, her clothes still on the bed, her slippers on the floor, her things still on the counter, a mocking reminder of just how fast death is.

One moment here and the next...gone.

I walked into my room, harshly slamming the door behind me, knowing very well I ain't getting any sleep tonight as well. Fantastic.

*************

"Hold the...the f..fuck on-" Alex said, panting in between his words, pausing in the middle of the street, his hands falling over his thighs as he bent down, trying to catch his next breath.

I paused in my hurried steps and took a couple backward in order to reach his side. He pulled himself up, straightening his body as he shot me one hell of a glare, "Damn you, Nikolas," He said, the words coming out with so much fury. He rushed his hand in his hair, pushing it back as he mumbled, "We've been running for an hour and a half, aren't you fucking tired!"

I shook my head but his glare stopped me from saying it out loud, "When I said let's work out this morning, I meant let's go to the gym for fifteen minutes and then drop by the coffee shop next to it, get coffee and something to eat and then each goes his separate way," He carried on, explaining.

He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck, messaging it as he sat down over the bench at the park's side, hefting out another tired breath, "Stop being an old man," I shot out as I sat down beside him, "Jogging is good, it helps you release your stress," And I have a lot of that on my plate.

He punched my arm, "You are the old one, shut up," He grumbled, "Also, the only stress in my life is you, so thanks, I don't need to jog, I just need you as far from me as possible, " He added, way too frustrated by the hour and a half we spent running.

"Says the guy who called me first thing in the morning," I said, my eyebrow raising.

He rolled his eyes, "My mistake, never doing it again," He was being extra grumpy, even though that was my part to fill, "So the best you can do now is take me to your house, make me some coffee, and feed me something to replace the calories I burned," He ordered.

I sighed, maybe putting some caffeine in him would help, "Come on," I said as I got up to my feet, "My house is a ten-minute walk from here," I said as I started to walk and he groaned again, following behind me as he mumbled some incoherent words under his breath.

I couldn't be happier when I unlocked the door and got in, Alex was really starting to get on my nerves. As usual, he walked ahead of me, going into the kitchen, and opening my fridge like he owned the house or something. He picked up an apple and took a bite, "You need to buy apples," He said, munching on his fruit as he slumped over the chair, taking another bite, "Now make me coffee, quick, you exhausted me for no reason."

I rolled my eyes at his drama before I walked further in, filling the coffee machine and turning it on. As I waited for it to be done, I walked up to my room, picked up the envelope from over my nightstand, and headed back to the kitchen.

I placed the envelope over the table in front of Alex, before I headed for the finished coffee and poured it into two cups. Alex picked up the envelope and eyed it from all sides, his eyebrows pulling closer as he continued munching on his apple, "What is this?"

"Did you write me a love letter?" He asked, a sheepish smile over his lips as I handed him his cup. I sat down on the chair across from him as he carried on with his nonsense, "Or is it a suicide letter," He added, winking, "I prefer the latter by the way."

I remained impassive to his weird self and gave him the answer, "Our mother left it for you."

Saying that was enough for his expression to shift a hundred eighty degrees, gone all the playfulness and annoyance, and in their place came a serious look. He instantly dropped the envelope back over the table, like touching it alone burned.

He rested his half-eaten apple away and took a sip of his coffee, his throat slightly bobbing. His eyes focused on the innocent piece of paper, almost like he could conjure it to open up and talk on its own. He remained silent for a couple of minutes, which was so not like him but I gave him the time to absorb this.

His gaze flickered from it and to me, trying to play it cool as he commented, "If she left me money, I don't want it," He tried to sound playful but miserably failed.

The corner of my lips pulled up slightly, because I knew exactly what he was feeling. He could deny it all he wants, but her death affected him too, differently from the way it impacted me but still did nevertheless.

I shook my head, "I am sure it is not money," I said.

His eyebrow raised, "What's in it, then?" He said, part of him scared to open it up on his own and figure it out.

I shook my head, "I have no idea," I mumbled.

Lines cut between his eyebrows, "You didn't open it?" He asked.

I shook my head, "Why would I?" I added, "It has your name on it," I explained, a low sigh parting my lips as I leaned back into my chair, "I didn't even open mine yet."

His eyebrow raised, "I would've totally opened yours before mine if I was the one to receive them," He said, his lips quirking and trying to shift his mood back to normal.

I shrugged before I took a sip of my coffee, "That's why we are too different."

He nodded, his hands tight over the cup in his hold, his eyes flickering back to the envelope but still not daring to open it up. Like me, I have a feeling he won't open it anytime soon either.

A few seconds of silence passed us by before the sound of low taps on the floor got closer and the stupid cat came running into the kitchen, jumping up and into Alex's lap, startling him at first, "Jesus-" He said, his eyes widening at first at the unexpected guest.

His shock wore off fast and he tapped his hand over the little thing's head before he looked up at me, "You adopted a cat?" He said in mockery just as Natalie stepped into the kitchen, "Massie, are you her-" Her steps and words halted when her gaze fell on us.

The cat jumped off Alex's lap and went toward her owner, rubbing itself all over her legs, seeking attention as usual. Natalie's eyes flickered from me and then to Alex, whose back was to her. Alex turned his head backward, meeting Natalie's gaze for a fleeting second. He turned back to my direction, his jaw involuntarily ticking before he got up to his feet, "I better get home," He mumbled, apparently not planning to look past whatever argument they had, which is probably the main reason behind Nate's current cold state toward me.

Natalie nervously shifted on her feet, her eyes that were focused on Alex slightly softened, a bit of guilt swarmed them and it seemed like she wanted to say something but held herself back.

Alex grabbed the envelope and looked at me, "Don't ever ask me to jog with you again, first and last time," He said, shooting me a glare before he turned around, walking past her without uttering a single word as he headed for the door, walking out and closing it behind before I got the chance to follow him.

I paused a few miles away from where Natalie was, her eyes were on the direction that Alex walked out into. They flickered to me, desperately trying to hide every emotion pushing and pulling into them. She was making the task of figuring her out harder and harder every time.

"Morning," She mumbled, trying to ease her nerves as her eyes flickered all over my face, and damn it, I would kill to figure out what was going on through her head at the moment.

"Morning," I said back while a hundred different words and questions fought to come out.

She looked around, again uncomfortable with our close proximity. The sound of her phone ringing almost made her jump, startled. She seems to be all out of sorts when surrounded by my presence these days, I desperately needed to know why. Did she figure out the whole truth? Did she make up theories of her own? What the hell is going on?

She placed her hand in her sweater's pocket and pulled the phone out. Reading the name over the screen, she immediately answered, "Hello," She said, her tone a bit urgent when she placed the phone to her ear.

"Yes, yes sure, go ahead," She said, her hand tightened over the phone as she anxiously listened to what was being told on the other side.

My eyes flickered from Nate to Ronald, who was coming in from behind her. He stopped right by her side, placing a hand to his mouth as a sleepy yawn escaped him. Natalie's eyes widened at whatever words she heard and they shot up immediately, falling on me first before they flickered to Ronald by her side, "Really?" She mumbled breathlessly, her voice shaking and the tears that gathered in her eyes got me more anxious and pulled me closer to her side.

Concerned lines etched Ronald's forehead as he looked back at her, trying to understand the sudden change in her mood, "What's wrong?" he mouthed.

She just shook her head, unable to speak as she kept listening to the person speaking to her. Her lower lip trembled and she bit on it, trying to keep herself intact, "Ye...yes, I am on my way, I will be there immediately," She said, hurriedly shutting the phone, her hands practically shaking over it.

"What the hell happened?" Ronald asked, a bit panicked at her state, beating me to it because she was getting me all agitated as well.

"It's dad-" Natalie started to say and all the color left Ronald's face as he probably cooked up the worst scenarios in his head, but then Natalie added, a few tears scrolling down her face, "He is asking for us," She mumbled in utter disbelief, "He remembers us, he..." Words betrayed her and she couldn't speak, "We need to go there now," She added, immediately whirling around and heading for her room.

Ronald stayed frozen in his spot as he tried to process what he just heard, his shocked eyes still at where Natalie disappeared into. I inched closer to his side, my hand pushing at his arm, urging him to move, "Come on," I said, already grabbing my jacket and keys.

Natalie came out so fast, she had changed from her shorts to jeans, still wearing the same sweatshirt, not willing to waste any time. She gathered her hair into a messy bun as she pushed her feet into the white sneakers, quickly coming to my side as we exited the house, Ronald following behind as well.

I unlocked the car and Natalie got in the backseat without uttering a single word, Ronald sat beside me, and I immediately pulled the car into the street, speeding toward the hospital. My eyes kept flickering to Nate from the rearview mirror, checking up on her state. She didn't sit still, she kept nervously shifting in her seat, torturing her lower lip as she chewed on it. She seemed to be both happy and distressed, at the same time scared and terrified.

The second I stopped the car; Natalie was already down and speeding toward the hospital's entrance. I left the car for the valet to park and went after her. I reached her side just as she was waiting for the elevator to arrive.

The energy radiating off her coaxed me closer. I rested my hand over her lower back, urging her to calm down, pause, and breathe. My gentle touch had her eyes shoot up to me, a war of emotions spun and tangled within the blue of her eyes, a color that has become my favorite without even realizing, "It is gonna be okay," I whispered.

Her throat bobbed heavily and she nodded her head. Little anxious lines etched between her eyebrows as she looked back at me, low puffs of air left her heaving chest as she tried to calm down her distressed nerves. Her eyes shone with so much innocence but also a bit of weakness flared in them. Fear, so much fear had somehow embedded itself within their layers. That alone had my jaw tightening in frustration; fear was practically a foreign feeling to her before me.

I wanted to say it out loud; how she doesn't have to be afraid, how I will protect her and every member of her family at all costs, how I will keep her safe, always. Whether she hates me or likes me, whether she hurts me or comforts me, I will always be there for her, I needed her to understand that.

The ding sound pulled us back in and our eye contact broke. The elevator door opened, and we waited for the people to step out before we got in, everyone was silent still, even Ronald, who seemed to be totally turned off and living in his own world, unaware of us both. My hand that was still over Nate's lower back moved, it rested on the side of her waist, keeping her all tucked up to my side, and the good thing is, she didn't push me away.

We stepped out and walked down the hallway, with every step, Natalie seemed to get tenser than before, a force pulling her backward but she kept moving, fighting against it. We paused by his room for a mere second, the door ajar, and sounds came from inside, the voice had Natalie suck into a deep breath, pressing her eyes shut, trying to drink in the feedback of what was happening before she'll have to face it with bare eyes.

Her eyelids glided open and I pulled my arm back when she opened the door, giving her the space she needed. The second her eyes fell on him, sitting over the bed, talking with the doctor, she marched forward, a low sob erupted from her throat when she crashed into the man's arms, startling him all of a sudden. His wide eyes, which now were more aware and alive than the last time we visited, they flickered down, already understanding who she is. There was a slight shake in his shoulders as he wrapped her up in his arms ever so tightly.

"Natalie," He whispered, almost like he couldn't believe it. Given the fact that the last time he saw her, with his mind fully operating, was years and years ago. She pulled back, a crying mess as she looked up at him, "Dad," She choked out and he stared back at her with a hundred different emotions; happiness, sadness, shock, and uttermost adoration.

He brought his shaking hand to her face, cupping her cheeks, "Oh, my beautiful girl," He said, his tone just as hoarse, and redness enveloped the white of his eyes, his messy emotions taking the best of him, "I can't believe it, you're..." agony twisted his expression and he couldn't finish the rest of his sentence, the situation hard on him too.

Natalie threw herself back into his chest, crying into his embrace and tightly hugging him. My eyes flickered to my side, where Ronald was standing all along, still by the door and refusing to get in. The muscles of his jaw tightened and I noticed him taking a few steps backward, ready to run away from this. My hand shot to his arm, stopping him from escaping. His wild eyes shot to mine and I shook my head, "You've run long enough, don't you think," I pointed out, looking inside, "Get in there."

I let go of him, leaving him to make the decision, to either escape or face this. His hand on the side was shaking so he curled it into a fist, he swallowed hard before he finally made up his mind and took a few steps in. The sound of him entering grabbed his father's attention. His hazel eyes flickered from the broken Natalie in his arm and toward his son. His expression twisted in pain again, lines tightened over his forehead, and against his will, a tear trickled down as he mumbled, "Ronald."

Natalie slightly edged backward, wiping her hands over her red flushed cheeks as Ronald got closer to the bed, carefully sitting on his father's other side. The man inched closer, swells of hurt bled from his gaze as he realized how much he had missed. A broken smile pulled up his lips as he gazed at his son, his hand resting over the side of Ronald's neck before he pulled him closer, hugging him tight as well. Ronald crashed into his hold, clinging to him. He was just a mess as Natalie is at the moment, if not more.

The doctor had excused himself when we arrived, giving the family some time to reunite. I was the only extra person in the room. I wanted to leave, give them some privacy, but the longer I stared at the man, the more intense the fire burning against my chest became.

I have his son.

It was better when his memories were locked up far away in his subconscious, at least then I didn't feel guilt for hiding his kid away from him, but now...

Just as the thought crossed my mind, hazel eyes flickered up and met the foreign presence in the room...me.

His eyes stayed focused on me for a very long second, almost like he is trying to place my face somewhere but failing, as if he knows me, but no, he doesn't. Natalie followed her father's gaze, the one that led to me, and she got up to her feet, "Uh, dad," She started to say, trying to introduce me, "That's uh-"

She hesitated so I took a couple of steps forward, "The name is Niko-"

"Nikolas," He said the rest of my name like he finally figured me out. Confusion wrapped up my expressions, and so did Natalie's and Ronald's, "You're Isaac's son," The man added, his words were followed by a low cloud of tension enveloping every corner of the room.

I expected a hostile reaction from him but instead, that same fact made his expression calm down and relax, trusting me for some reason. Don't trust me, I kidnapped your kid. "You just look so much like him."

Oh, come on...

My jaw tightened, already uncomfortable with all of this, "Dad, how do you know Isaac?" Natalie asked, an edge in her tone as she tried to understand this messy situation.

He turned to her, wholeheartedly believing in his next words as he muttered, "He was a friend," He looked back at me, "Your father helped...us a lot."

"Not many people refer to my father as a...friend," The words left my lips with a bit of an edge, bitter even.

How did Isaac convince Maria, Nathan, and this man that he is the hero in shining armor? Or maybe, he was that to them. Meanwhile, he made sure that me and my mother only saw his evil most twisted side.

My fingers curled into the inside of my palm, trying to control my immense rage. The topic of Isaac is alone capable of me losing all of my cool. The man got up to his feet, standing up, his eyes still on me, trying to figure out how I fit in this equation but his gaze was still trustful nevertheless, I guess Natalie got her naive I-see-the-good-in-all-people trait from him.

The man stood at a height close to mine, the color had returned to his face when compared to the days from before, his eyes more alive, breathing and reacting. A bit of grey had woven and interlocked with the light brown of his hair. His eyes were a mix of light brown and green, a shade so similar to that of Nathan's.

He extended his hand forward, "Micheal."

I nodded in acknowledgment and placed my hand in his, his grip firm and tight as we shook hands. I couldn't stop myself from saying the rest of my words out loud, "It's a very different time now, so don't put your trust in Isaac," I gave him an advice. The man took your son and made him his own. I kept that last part to myself.

"Dad, he is right," Natalie interjected, grabbing her father's attention to her, "Isaac is dangerous, he is not a good man," At least she was still on my side, "I don't know what he helped you with before, but he is not to be trusted."

Conflicted thoughts pushed and pulled at Micheal's gaze, trying to comprehend what we said. His gaze was back on me, his eyebrow raised, "And what about you?" He was questioning if I was to be trusted or not, considering I share DNA with the devil.

I shrugged, "It's up for debate," I said, a hint of playfulness in my tone.

His lips twitched and he gave me a nod, a one that said I will wait and figure out the answer to that myself, "One thing you can be sure of is," I added, "Your family is safe with me," I said, my eyes on Natalie, and the man finally understood who I am.

His eyes were now a bit wary as they assessed me, his voice a bit low as he added, "Your father once said that same exact sentence," His words were enough to mess me up more from the inside, he was indirectly accusing me of being like Isaac. But I wasn't. I am not better than him, that's true, but still, I am not him.

I couldn't be happier when the doctor walked into our conversation, interrupting it as he explained to the three of them Micheal's healing process. I took that as my chance to get out, escape because, Natalie's father or not, the man was playing on my nerves. He better not use Isaac as his friend now, it was plausible, Isaac will know exactly how to manipulate the truths and paint me as the only villain in this story.

My jaw tightened and I fished my phone out, texting one of my men, and checking up on Nathan since he keeps seeking trouble. He was no easy kid, that is for sure. Not long after I left, I saw Ronald exit the room as well, he crashed on one of the chairs, beyond exhausted, emotionally more than physically.

His eyes flickered up to me, noticing my confused gaze. His jaw worked, "I couldn't stay inside," He mumbled, answering a question I didn't ask, "Because if I did, I will have to tell him, and I just don't know how."

"Tell him about?"

"Everything," He said with an edge, rushing a frustrated hand through his hair, "About me, what I do, about...Nathan," His words tightened all of my muscles, "I can't tell him yet," He shook his head, "It feels like taking something from him before even giving it, damn it," He grumbled out, enraged, "I don't even know where Isaac is keeping him now."

So, he doesn't know yet. Good. The less that people know, the lower the risk of my plan getting ruined.

I sat on the seat next to him, "Telling him now is not gonna help anyone," I said, part stating facts, and part giving myself some time to deal with this, "He is just starting to heal, he has to make up for years and years of lost memories, it is not going to be easy to adjust, so pushing all of this on him now at once won't help his case, he needs time and till then, we would've figured out what to do," I explained and Ronald listened, desperate for any advice, even if it is coming from me.

He nodded, understanding that too, because it was logical.

Ronald's gaze flickered to his lap, his shoulders tense as he lowly grated out, "I need to finish what I started."

I agreed with him on that. Joseph needs to be out of the picture as soon as possible.

I nodded, "We will take care of it," That I truly meant, "Joseph will meet an end soon, I will make sure of it."

The bitterness in my words had Ronald's eyes meet mine, "So what now, you are helping me?"

My eyebrow raised, "I am not doing it for you."

He scoffed, "Yeah, true," Annoyance flared in his tone and he let out a low sigh, "Look, I will never approve of you and Natalie, you are like an example of the worst man anyone would wish for his sister."

The bitch.

Damn you Alex, his vocabularies always rub on me.

"No one cares about what you approve of," I stated, ready to put his head through the near wall.

His lips pressed into a thin line, "I know," He mumbled, "But still, for some fucked up reason, something that I despise and hate to say out loud but I know that somehow Natalie is...safe with you."

He glared at me, "But keep in your mind, if you dare hurt her, in any way, I swear to god I will put a bullet in you," He grated out, getting up to his feet, "Don't underestimate me, Nikolas, I know exactly how to stab from behind."

I rolled my eyes at his drama, as if I am even capable of hurting Natalie. The girl got me wrapped around her fingers. I wanted to slam my head against the wall behind me, groaning in annoyance at my state; look at what batshit I've become.

When I heard Natalie's voice, I turned my head, watching her exit the room with the doctor, talking with him with a hint of a smile on her face. When they finished their conversation and the man walked away, her eyes looked around, searching before they fell on me. When I saw her inch closer, I got up to my feet, trying to analyze the look on her face, hoping to figure out whether she will kick me out of here or ask me to stay longer.

"Hey," She mumbled, her tone softer than before, her body language welcoming, and I let out a low breath, relieved to see her all calm.

"Hey," I said back.

"Uh, thank you," She looked in the room's direction then back at me, "For being here, thanks."

I shook my head, "I didn't do anything."

She brought her hand and rubbed it over her throat, "Nikolas," She addressed me again, my name leaving her mouth so different from how she used to say it and that didn't settle well with me.

"Yeah?"

"I am not okay," She started to say, her eyes on mine as she truthfully spoke, "I feel like a total mess these days, for so many reasons, and when I usually feel as such, I take a step back, I try to deal with my problems on my own and fix them before I get to face the concerned person," She explained, "So, once I have dealt with my own issues, I promise to come to you and talk about...us."

Her words were both comforting and stressing me out.

"Till then," She extended her hand forward, a gesture of seeking peace, "Till then, we can be friends."

My jaw ticked as I stared at her extended hand and I shook my head, "I don't do friendships, Natalie," She looked taken aback by my words and dissatisfied tone. She was about to retreat her hand back, but my big one engulfed hers and pulled her closer to me from it. She gasped at the little distance separating us now and we both breathed the same air.

I brought my fingers to her chin, lifting it up so her eyes can see mine, "But you can take all the time you want," My voice was lower now, and my tone more gentle. With my fingers hooked under her chin, my thumb drew lazy circles at the corner of her mouth, my eyes focused on those full lips, grasping for control because I was one second away from taking them into mine, showing her what type of friend I can be, "I will still be here, waiting for you," I assured her, my eyes flickering up to hers.

They were a bit wide, a bit shocked, and I am sure she was thinking of how badly she wanted me to kiss her too. Natalie is good at many things but not at hiding what she truly feels. Her big innocent eyes always gave her away. My beautiful delicate girl, she was only mine. The Nikolas who always pushed her away is gone, and in his place is the Nikolas who will keep fighting for her at all costs.

She blinked, slowly getting back to herself when I broke contact with our skins. Her throat bobbed heavily and she gave me a low nod before she made excuses and ran off. A little smile pulled up one corner of my lips, her flustered face and hazy eyes were the prettiest things in this ugly world of mine.

My phone buzzed, forcing me to break my gaze away from where she ran into. I pulled it out, my expression shifting at the reply I received to my previous message about Nathan, 'Sir, it's better if you come here. Things are getting out of control.'

Damn it, what did that kid do again?

***************

Emma's POV

"I hate this," I grumbled again, not failing to express my level of annoyance at this over and over again.

Roman sighed, getting fed up with my complaints, "Emma, honey, I told you to stay at home, didn't I?" He said, feeding me the words as if he is talking to a little baby so I harshly elbowed him in the stomach. He groaned in pain and added, "You're still sick anyway, you should've stayed in and I would've taken care of this myself."

I shot him a glare, "I am not sick," I shot out angrily, "My voice still sounds funny, that's all, other than that, I can totally kick your ass, wanna try?" I challenged with a raised eyebrow.

Trying to play on my good side, Roman brought his arm around my waist, tightly tucking me closer, and dropped a little kiss over my shoulder, on the bare skin from where my dress's sleeve had fallen into my arm. His touch and lips relaxed me a little, he deserves brownies points for that.

"Also, I really hate this specific friend of yours, so I am not sending you alone to talk with him," I stated, addressing that stupid Laurens, "He can be a bad influence on you."

His eyebrow raised, "I am not a kid," he pointed out.

I nodded, "I know, you are a man, which means the exact same thing."

He shot me a glare at my mocking tone and I flashed him a sheepish smile before I leaned closer and pecked his tasty lips, "My favorite man-child," I mumbled and he groaned in pure annoyance, hating my mockery.

I gave him a teasing wink before I picked up my cocktail and took a sip, "Why are you friends with people like him, anyway?" I said, trying not to remember the bruises over his wife's back. I focused on the part where I kicked his ass in the bathroom and that alone brought a smile to my lips. I hope that he learned his lesson after that.

"I've known him since we were kids, we went to the same school, and you know, our business," He commented, stressing on that specific word, "throws us in the same circle always."

I know that his father is someone important in the British mob, but still...

I mean it's not like we were perfect humans either. We are all sorts of fucked up with the job we do on daily basis, but there are some levels of fucked-up that I can't tolerate.

Just then, my gaze flickered to the restaurant's entrance, falling on Laurens as he proudly strode inside, still wearing the uniform from his so-called daily job. The words metropolitan police were spelled over his bullet-proof vest, his legally owned gun safely tucked on his side. He was our man on the inside, but still, killing him won't hurt the business that much I suppose...

He spotted us and headed in our direction, his gaze on me only as he paused by our table, "Evening guys," His voice was light and playful but I could clearly see that wary look developing in his eyes, I noticed how involuntarily his hand rested over his gun, seeking comfort from his little buddy, or maybe trying to warn me that this time he would fight me back. As if.

It was clear as the sun, me beating him up bruised his ego. He looked like one of those men, the insecure ones who take pleasure in putting women down, those who think of us just as sex toys to satisfy their needs and maids to fill their stomachs.

Yeah, I internally scoffed, not on my watch.

My smile was wide and wicked as he seated himself across from us, "Hey, Laurens," I said, a bit more enthusiastic than usual as my gaze flickered down, "How are the boys down there doing?" I asked, indirectly referring to the balls I kicked, "Still capable of making kids?"

He chuckled, trying to display great sportsmanship, "Yeah," He shrugged, "Couldn't have sex for a week but who's complaining."

"Not your wife, I am sure."

Roman tightened his grip over my waist, asking me to stop the teasing and have us get straight to business, "Let's order something to drink as you brief us on what has been going on lately," Roman interfered, putting an end to our banter because he knows I won't stop till I put a bullet into the man.

Laurens discussed with us what the police and the FBI have been up to these days, how close to us they've been getting and how to steer them off our tail. For that part, we were always careful. Only a couple of arrests have been made over the century, and they were all arranged on our part, convincing the government that they got the bad guy and won, all while we secretly operated underground.

They will never gain total control over us, our roots were deep down in every city and country, it was tainted roots but it was situated deep nevertheless. Isaac might be fucked up, especially when it comes to us, but he was a good leader in that sense, a one that made our family the strongest among all. I hate to admit it, but it is the truth. Being ruthless and twisted paid out and made him win above everything.

"I got all the files with me, they're back at home," Laurens clarified, referring to everything he stole from the department for the sake of our families, "You can drop by on your way back and I will give them to you, maybe they can come in handy one day," He suggested and Roman agreed.

We paid the check and left the restaurant, Laurens didn't make any other comment that made me want to rip his throat out but the looks he gave me every now and then were enough. A look spoke volumes, of how much he wanted to repay me back for what I had done. The only thing stopping him is the fact that my husband is somehow his friend. Roman, of course, was totally unaware of Lauren's sneaky looks, because as I had previously stated, men are idiots.

Roman opened the car door for me and when I looked at him, his delicious lips lifted up into a small smile, involuntarily making me smile as well. True he was an idiot, but he was my handsome delicious idiot, the one I am gonna eat alive when we get back home. I leaned closer and pecked his lips before I got into the car, Roman circled his way around, getting into the driver seat and pulling behind Laurens' car.

I looked at my idiot husband for a long second. He noticed my stare and turned to me, winking as he brought his free hand and placed it over mine, "What's wrong?"

I ran my fingers over the top of his hand, drawing random patterns as I asked, "Do you like this Laurens guy?" I mean, picking a friend like that must tell a lot about you, which is why I don't do friends, no one matches my energy, "I mean, as a person and character, do you like him?"

Roman gave me a look of understatement, reading what was going through my mind and he shook his head, "If it wasn't for the work we do together, believe me, I wouldn't as much come near him again," He said, shaking his head with a sigh, "Ethan and I have warned him a lot at the beginning of his marriage, when we noticed about what he was doing to Celine," He indirectly meant the abuse, the one apparently had been going on for years, "Believe me, I had beaten his ass a couple of times over it as well."

My jaw tightened, unable to bear the thought. That lady was annoying as fuck but I didn't like to see people helpless. I was helpless once and I know how terrible that feeling is.

**FLASHBACK**

I fell down on my back over the mat, all the punches I had taken drained all of my energy away. Everywhere ached. Everywhere hurts like a fucking bitch. My consciousness was hanging right by the edge, so ready to give up and I wished to just black out. It will hurt less if I pass out.

Pain pulsed and throbbed all over my body; my stomach, my legs, and my face. Everywhere ached, even my brain. Blood had mixed with sweat and I was still praying to pass out because there is no way I am getting up and resuming this. It's been hours. It's been days. I can't take it anymore.

"Emma, get up!" Matilde shot out and I flinched, my eyes pressing shut and my jaw tightening. If I hated Isaac, I hated this woman ten folds more.

I didn't budge, I didn't move a muscle, not that I can. I was losing the sense of all my organs and how they operate. Come on brain, take me away from her, knock me unconscious, please brain. My brain became my enemy and didn't grant me a few moments of peace, it kept me awake and in immense pain.

I felt Matilde's feet nudge the side of my leg, asking me to open my eyes and get up. Maybe I can pretend to be dead, maybe they will bury me ten feet underground and relieve me of all of this, "Emma, if you don't get up, you know exactly the type of punishment you will get-" The venom in her tone was enough for me to snap my eyes open. I was in no state to take in another punishment.

"It's enough-" I whispered, my throat hoarse because of the hit it took a couple of minutes ago. It was enough, because I couldn't possibly take on another session. It wasn't physically feasible anymore.

Matilde crouched down by my side, her full lips, the one covered with bright red lipstick tilted into a dark smirk, the look in her smoky eyes was of pure evil; Isaac knew exactly who to pick in order to take care of the girls of the HEX. She was the most ruthless of them all. Maybe my father should marry her, they would make a perfect couple...

"It's only enough when I say so," She grated out, her fingers harshly wrapping over my arm, her nails digging into the bare skin as she dragged me up, forcing me to stand. I whimpered in pain but the pain wasn't an excuse to stop in their opinion.

My eyesight was hazy, I could see two or three of the man standing in front of me, fighting me, or in their words teaching me how to fight. My shaking fingers held into the ropes at the side, trying to stay steady as he came at me again. My chest heaved and I wanted to fight back but the thought of him beating me senseless till I pass out was more appealing so I let him do just that.

A wounded cry tore up my throat at the immense pain vibrating through my being at his attacks. He didn't stop. He was ordered not to stop unless one of us falls down. I will let that one be me. Just let it be so I can rest. Another punch collided with my face, and the impact of it vibrated through every alive cell in my being with searing pain. The force pushed me back, my body collapsing into a weak mess over the floor and finally, I felt the blackness swarm my vision.

A satisfied smile pulled my lips slightly, finally. I heard Matilde snap and shout some more but none of that mattered as I got sucked into a deep black hole where I could finally rest.

**********

"Emma?" Roman's voice pulled me back in, it felt like his voice dragged me out of that memory pit and my head shot up in his direction, "Huh?"

Worried lines etched between his eyebrows, his hand that's over mine gently squeezed, "Are you okay?"

I gulped down and nodded, forcing on a smile, "Yeah, yeah, what's w-" I looked around us as I spoke, only then realizing that we had arrived at Laurens' place. I was so out of it I haven't even noticed, which is why Roman seems to be a bit concerned.

"Let's just get the files and go back home," I said, already opening my door and getting down, Roman came to my side as we headed toward the porch, thankfully not questioning more. I felt his hand rest over my lower back and I leaned into it, savoring his gentle touch.

Laurens placed the key in its hole, twisting it, many times, unlocking it before he opened the door and stepped inside. My eyebrows pulled closer, if his wife is inside, why would he lock the door? My jaw ticked and I followed inside, it better not be what I think it is or I would literally kill him, I am already on edge after my mind took me down memory lane.

"Celine?" He said and footsteps descended down the stairs before she came into view. Her eyes fell on us and she placed on one hell of a fake smile, "Hello, welcome," She greeted us as she came to a close stop.

"Get in," Laurens said to us, "I will go bring them."

He made his way up the stairs and my gaze flickered to the woman, my eyes narrowing as I assessed her state. One wrong thing I see and I am making a scene. I am already sure he locks her in this house, god knows what more he does to her.

"Uh, come in here," She gestured toward the living room, "Would you like something to drink," She said, pulling on a warm tone but I could cut through her bullshit. She seemed to be agitated, and tensed, the slight twitch in her fingers was an evidence enough for me.

"No, we'll just get something from Laurens and we'll be on our way," Roman answered, declining her offer.

My eyes kept their search for anything out of the ordinary, and she seemed to suspect that, because she nervously took a couple of steps backward, turning her face the other way, in an attempt to hide something. But no, I ain't stupid. I inched closer, my eyes focused on the left side of her face, where her hair was covering a big portion of it, and I am pretty sure it was hiding bruised skin behind.

I didn't hesitate, I moved closer, prying into her personal space as I moved her hair away, exposing what she is hiding. She flinched and the sight that welcomed me was worse than anticipated, the skin was red and purple mixed together, even her ear, it wasn't even a usual bruise, part of the skin seems like it was burned, and that alone ignitated my whole being with a searing fire.

Her eyes widened and she immediately stepped away, using her hair to cover up the mess again. My wild eyes held her as I shot out, "He did this?" I know he did, but I needed her to confirm it.

She shook her head, "No, no," She said, her voice shaking, "I had an accident a couple of days ago," She tried to lie but miserably failed. The typical abusive relationship. Trying to protect your abuser, or too scared of his reaction if you out him out.

"Emma," Roman called for me, asking me to stay in control but fuck that, I was ready to burn the man alive.

"Look, I can get you out of here, I will put you somewhere safe, where he would never dare to touch you again, so just tell me," her eyes widened more at my insistence, "Was it him?"

Before she had the chance to answer me, Laurens was making his way back to us. She flinched and took a couple of steps backward, trying to shift her expression back to normal and I felt Roman's hand over my arm, stopping me. My hand shook at the side as Laurens came to a stop across from us, handing the files to Roman, "We'll keep in touch if anything else happens," Laurens said and Roman agreed.

His hand over my arm tightened, urging me to step back and leave here, "We'll deal with this later," Roman whispered beside my ear, pulling me alongside him. My eyes stayed on her, asking her to give me the answer so I can rightfully explode but she didn't, still protecting him.

A volcano was rising in my chest, an inferno ready to smash and ruin. We stepped outside, Celine beside Laurens as he bid us goodbye, his finger over the door, ready to close it as we leave. I gave her one last look, my jaw tight with anticipation, begging her for any clue. Fearful tears welled up in her eyes and she nodded her head, finally giving me my answer.

I didn't need more. I tore my arm away from Roman's grip and marched forward, my feet slammed over the door, pushing it open before he got the chance to shut it. I pulled my gun out, using it to slam it against his face, using his shock as an advantage to my side. I landed another punch to his face, and pushed my knee into his stomach, harsh enough to bring him down again. I was operating so fast and with so much rage, he couldn't get the chance to take the upper hand over me, not that he could.

Once he was on his knees, I pressed the gun's barrel against his temple, "I warned you, you piece of shit," I grated out, "I warned you but the likes of you never learn," I pushed the gun further into his skin, ready to pull the trigger and kill him on the spot.

"Emma," Roman grated out, carefully, asking me to think before I hastily do anything and kill the man. He deserved to die, didn't he?

Lauren's eyes flickered up to me and instead of showing his defeat, the retarded man's lips pulled up into a smile before I felt something sharp press against the side of my legs and he moved so fast, "Not this time, sweetheart," He grated out, his knife hurting my skin but I was fast enough to move, the gun dropping away from him as the stung over my leg intestefied but still, nothing I couldn't take.

Before I could jump on him, Roman landed one hell of an uppercut against the guy's jaw, sending him backward and away from me, his knife falling to the floor. Roman picked it up and moved closer to him, his fingers wrapping over the man's hair and pulling his head back just as he pressed the knife's sharp edge to his throat, hard enough to draw blood.

Laurens whimpered and struggled, "You dare touch my wife again," Roman stressed out, rage in his words and fire in his eyes, "And I will fucking rip your hands off, you get that," He grated out and pulled the knife away only to push it against Lauren's abdomen, a spot that will hurt but not kill. My husband, always been the good one between the two of us.

Satisfied at the man's cry of pain, my lips twitched up. I hate for someone else to fight my battles, but when Roman does it...it's different. My eyes went to Celine, whose cheeks were strained with tears but not an ounce of remorse in her eyes as she watched her husband struggle and bleed, instead, she looked pleased. Atta girl.

I moved to Roman's side, my hands tightening over the man's chin as I forced him to face me, "You will pay for this," He grumbled out, a bit of blood dripped from the corner of his mouth, his eyes darkening at his helpless state.

I chuckled, "I would love to see you try," I said before my fist collided against his face again, one, two, three, four, five...I kept going till I lost count. I was just trying to make equal for how many punches he had landed on her face and body over the years.

My knuckles started to hurt, blood gathered over them, and only then, I retreated back. His face, his nose, his eyes, I didn't leave a spot I didn't mess up. I was panting but I was satisfied with my masterpiece. He was teetering over the edge and the last punch that knocked him unconscious came from Roman, who slammed the gun's grip against Lauren's temple.

The man collapsed to the floor and I got up to my feet, fisting and unfisting my hand as I tried to deal with the ache. My eyes met Roman's, who seemed to be enraged and not quite satisfied with what we did, but he had no choice since I made it my mission to interfere.

"Mommy," The low sound and light footsteps that echoed had me whirl around, my eyes wide as they spotted a small little thing running down the stairs. He rushed toward Celine, crashing into her arms. She picked up the little boy, her hand over the back of his head, stopping him from turning, looking at his father and the mess we made.

She whispered some soothing words to him, smiling and touching his face. I gulped down. I didn't know they had a kid.

I wiped the blood from my hands away, as not to scare the poor little thing. I inched closer, my eyes drifting from him and to her, "Go and quickly pack whatever you can," I said and she nodded, "I will get you out of here before...he wakes up."

She gave me another nod, her throat bobbing heavily as her eyes flickered behind me and to him. Fear rushed with full force and I rested my hand over her arm, "He won't come near you again, I promise," I said grabbing her attention to me. She gave me an appreciative look before she whirled around and up the stairs, more than ready to get out of here, god knows the type of hell he made her live through.

I felt Roman step closer to me, his hand grabbed my arm and he pushed me toward the kitchen, rather harshly, forcing me to sit down. I was about to get up but he didn't let me, "Sit down," He grated out.

Does he want me to punch him?

He crouched down, his hand wrapping over my leg and pulling it up. I flinched and that's when I realized what he was inspecting. Blood was dripping down from where that fucker pushed his knife. The cut he left behind wasn't that big but it wasn't small either, a good amount of blood had seeped through and I finally understood Roman's agitated state.

I leaned closer and rested my hand over his cheek, bringing his attention to my face. His wild green eyes met mine and I offered him a soothing smile, "It's fine," I said, "I've had much worse, believe me," I added, playfully but he found no humor in my words.

A loud breath pushed off his lungs, and his eyes drifted down before they held mine again, "Emma, I know that you like to fight your own battles and that you are strong enough to do it but-" His jaw ticked, "But that doesn't mean I don't fucking worry every time you do it, because if anything happens to you-"

I stopped him by shaking my head, "Nothing will, do you know why?" For the first time, I didn't feel weak to draw strength from someone else, the opposite actually, it made me feel more empowered and powerful than ever, "Because I've got you."

He leaned into my touch, his hand coming above mine before he placed a kiss over the inside of my palm, "I love you, you crazy girl," He whispered and I smiled.

He picked up a first aid kit from the cabinet and as he took care of my wound, my mind couldn't help but push me back down that unwanted memory lane again.

**FLASHBACK**

I flinched at the sensation of a hand over my face. My eyelids felt so heavy but I forced them open, I blinked through the hazy image and tried to focus my sight. I blinked again until he came fully into view. He had a small cotton in his hand, taking care of my wounds. Something he always does, even though we are totally forbidden to ever help one another.

Enzo, he was another member in here. One of the guys who were forced to be trained at the HEX.

He was my friend, I guess.

I smiled lazily, "One time they gonna catch you," I mumbled and he shook his head, "It doesn't matter." I felt his fingers at the corner of my lips, wiping the blood away. The way his fingers brushed over my lips had me gulp down, for the first time feeling...something.

My muscles clenched and I shook myself back in, my gaze flickering away from him as I felt the redness flush my skin.

"What's wrong?" He noticed my frustration and I shook my head, "Nothing," I quietly mumbled.

"Why don't I feel any pain?" I asked after a while, noticing how I am feeling kind of okay, I should be feeling like I was run over by a truck by the number of punches I took.

"I stuffed in you as many painkillers as I can," He said and I chuckled, "Oh, that's why I feel kind of high."

His lips twitched into a smile and he nodded, but his eyes were full of worry and concern. This is not the first nor the last time I will land unconscious and he knew that very well. He was done clearing my wound, he removed the medicine bottles and the cotton away before he sat down by my side on the bed, resting his back against the headrest.

Silence consumed us in for a long moment and without saying anything, he rested his arm around my shoulders. I leaned into him, closing my eyes and enjoying a few moments of peace before all hell breaks loose again.

*********

I blinked, bringing myself back to the present, my gaze falling on the rearview mirror, watching Celine in the backseat wrap her arms around her little boy, caressing his face and whispering a few soothing words to get him to sleep.

We left Laurens a bloody mess over the floor and took her along. She can stay with us in the mansion for the time being as I find a better way to help her escape with her kid, live safely, and far away from that fucker. I will make sure he will never hurt her again, that much I can promise.

We went into the house, the little boy looking around the foreign surroundings, curious and scared. He stayed close to his mother and when his eyes found mine, I offered him a small smile and winked. He smiled back, redness caught his cheeks as he hid his head behind his mother's leg, a little shy.

I showed Celine her room and before I could leave, her hand came to my arm, stopping me, "Thank you," She mumbled, "We don't even know each other but you did what no one did before you," She added, her eyes still full of fear and tears, uncertain of what to do next but I am sure she will figure it out with time.

I shook my head, not used to thank you's, "I didn't do anything," I mumbled and headed to my room, not familiar with that appreciative look in her eyes or how I am supposed to react to it.

I took a shower and crashed into the bed, Roman's arm came around me, pulling me closer to him. He still seemed to be agitated and all out of sorts, almost as if he is not satisfied with what we did. He was so silent all the way back home.

I faced him, "Are you okay?"

He didn't give me an answer to that, instead he just vaguely said, "I just have a feeling this will explode on us in a very bad way."

I rested my hand over his cheek, "Nothing will happen, don't be paranoid," I tried to drift his mind off the subject as I pressed my lips into his. With a kiss here and a nib there, one second we had clothes on, and the next we didn't, our skin sinking into one another, wanting, craving, and needing one another.

I took his mind off this and he took mine off the lane of memories that keeps chasing me.

It worked at first.

Then, it didn't.

I woke up at the break of dawn, panting as I dragged myself out of my horrendous nightmare. The lights were on still, Roman always kept them on for my sake. Still, I woke up shaking as the remnants of my dream chased my consciousness.

I turned to Roman, who was peacefully sleeping, thankfully unaware of my agitated state. Not wanting to bother him and not willing to speak out loud about these nightmares, I pulled myself out of his embrace and off the bed. I knew that no way in hell will I be able to get back to sleep now after all that was going through my head.

I wore a random legging and a sweatshirt, I pulled my hair into a high ponytail before I exited the mansion. A jog in the early morning always worked well for me. It helped that the mansion was near the forest, a green space to exert all of my tension out. The security asked me if I needed any help as I stepped away from our house's boundary.

"I will be back in a bit," I replied before I started my jog, heading toward the forest's direction. It wasn't till I was halfway there that I realized my phone was back at home. I decided against going back, I will just clear my mind for a couple of minutes and return. I didn't need my phone.

I picked up the speed and ran fast, relieving my tensed muscles and smelling the fresh smell of grass. It was liberating, the way the cold breeze whipped across my face and ran through my hair, the sight of green surrounding me from all sides, the low sound of birds chirping up in the sky as they started ahead with their day, it was exactly what I needed.

It was refreshing but my mind wasn't fully healed yet from my dream, more memories, and flashes pushing to the forefront of my head against my own will.

"Now, do it!" Matilde shot out and I flinched, my jaw tightening and my fingers slightly shook over the gun. I hated her, I hated her so much.

The man they had wrapped up to the chair was knocked down, immobile. A black bag over his head, hiding his identity because it doesn't matter who the target is. That's what they always say. A target is a target, you don't need to know his name, his face, or his story. They think it makes it easier and less personal when so.

I shook my head, shaking the thought away, and sped faster between the trees, the sound of grass getting crushed under my feet got louder as I ran like I was escaping from something. Truth is, I was, escaping from my past, that was never an easy task.

I hesitated, and of course, I did hesitate, your first kill shouldn't be easy. You are taking a life away. It can never be easy. Who gave you the power to decide whether this person should live or die?

"Emma!" Matilde shot out in anger.

"Okay, okay-" I said back in panic, my chest heaving, and my eyes on my target, my finger over the trigger, ready to fire and kill.

I kept running, I was running out of breath but I didn't stop. The chaos taking over my head was
more powerful than anything else.

"Emma, you do it, or you will be the one seated with the bag on your head!" She snapped.

"Now, pull the damn trigger!" Her harsh order was followed by the loud sound of the shot being fired. I watched the act play in slow motion, the way the bullet left the barrel and traveled till it hit the man in his chest, right where his heart is. The force shook him, his body edging forward before it crashed back. The recoiling of the gun harshly pushed me backward, or maybe it was the intensity of what I just committed.

I stopped running only when I came crashing so hard into something...someone.

Rough hands came around my arms, holding me in place. Feeling alarmed, I immediately pushed myself back, my gaze flickering up to the person I bumped into. A man I didn't recognize welcomed me. I looked around me, my chest heaving for its next breath when I realized I've steered so far away from home.

"Sorry," I mumbled to the stranger before I started to turn around, ready to head back. The second I turned, I was welcomed by the sight of four tall men crowding my space.

The hell-

I looked over my shoulder at the strange old man. He had a dangerous look in his eyes, one that said he is so ready to strangle me alive. In his dreams. My mind might be weak at the moment but my knife was safely tucked in my boots. I can still fight.

"I've been hearing your name a lot," The man's voice held an accent, it was venomous, "And it is starting to play on my nerves, Emma."

I fully turned and crossed my arms over my chest, my eyebrow raising in mockery, "And you are?"

"You hurt my son last night," He said and I scoffed, Laurens sent his daddy after me, wow, so manly of him. The old man stepped closer, "And before him, you had hurt my daughter, so you can see why I am on edge right now."

"Daughter?" Lines etched my eyebrows, who is he talking about?

His eyebrow raised at my audacity of not knowing who his daughter is, "Yeah, you broke her nose in the bathroom, does it ring a bell?"

My eyes grew wide in shock, that fake barbie, Roman's ex, she's his daughter? She is Lauren's sister? My jaw tightened in pure frustration, Roman didn't even mention it, no wonder he was on edge last night. The idiot is gonna get a good taste of my knife when I get back home.

Fuck, it suddenly made sense how she showed up at the restaurant that day, the same day we went out with Laurens and his wife. Damn it. That bitch was planning to go after me all along. After I am done with her father and brother, she is next on my list.

"Unlike your father, sweetheart, I don't tolerate it when someone touches my family," The threat behind his words was wide and clear. I felt the men behind me move closer so I didn't waste a second as I leaned down and pulled the knife from my boots, whirling around and more than ready to fight back.

I slammed into the first guy, my knife grazing his cheek before I kicked him backward, but the next one came and so did the third and the fourth, they came at me from all sides. The fuckers. I fought still, causing significant damage to them as they did to me. I couldn't avoid the punch than landed on my stomach or the one that slammed over my face but I was able to break one guy's nose and a couple of ribs of the other.

I knew I couldn't scream, my home was far away from here, and they won't hear me, so I held into my power and kept fighting back, taking in whatever they threw at me. It wasn't new, I've done it multiple times before.

I knocked one of them unconscious and I took full pride in that, even when I felt blood drip down my mouth from how hard the punch he threw at my chest was. Their attack was close to blind me out but I hung on still. I can do this.

I could've done it, I could've won this fight if only my brain didn't betray me, but it did as it kept replaying memories I didn't want or need. Memories that made me weak to the bones.

"Good job," Matilde said proudly as I finally made my first kill. She walked out of the room after, leaving me alone with the dead body laying on the chair across from me, leaving me to drink in the feedback and taste the pain on my own.

I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I wanted to scream but I couldn't. I killed someone. A first to many to come, as they say. More will come, that's for sure. I can't stop them. I can't fight them. They will win, they will make me a monster. I should just give up and let them do as they please. There is no escaping it anymore.

I wanted one thing though, I wanted to see the face of my first victim, maybe his features will haunt me every time I am going to do this from now onwards. I wanted to punish myself, because that day will come soon, the one when I won't feel any remorse when I commit murder.

To that day, I want to feel pain and pain only.

I felt a hand fist my hair, pull me backward, and slam my head so harshly against the tree. The hand belonged to the old man. His attack was so brutal, the impact had my body collapse over the ground. I blinked, fighting to stay awake but I couldn't. A low whimper escaped past my bruised lips, Roman's name over the top of my tongue but I couldn't physically voice it out loud.

The man kicked at the side of my chest, breaking a few more ribs. The others landed a few kicks too, taking pleasure in seeing me down. The pain became too strong and overpowered all of my senses. I couldn't breathe. My eyelids fell down in defeat and my brain played one last memory before it totally blacked out.

I inched closer to the lifeless body, my inside too numb I wasn't even scared anymore. I inched closer, my fingers wrapping around the bag's fabric, and slowly pulled it off my victim's face. The sight that welcomed me had me gasping, a shriek of pain echoed into the walls as the gun fell from my grip and I stepped backward, my wide eyes on the lifeless face of Enzo.

My first victim was...my one and only friend. The boy who took care of me. The one who healed my wounds. A loud scream erupted from my lungs and bounced off the walls before I dropped down on my knees. My first victim was the boy that I felt for way more than my young brain can comprehend.

That day I got broken to shreds. That day I shed my last tears. That day I promised to never care for anyone again, to have no friends or family. That I was alone in this world. I came alone and I will leave it alone. I was better off alone.

That day the weapon they spent years contructing was born.

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Hey, I am finally here, sorry for the long wait but I was going through the most tiring and stressful month of my life.

How are y'all doing? Hopefully, you are still sticking around and didn't give up on me yet xD

You better be here, because there is still more insanity to come xD you need to witness it all!

Usually, everyone is suffering and Emma and roman are just having sex, but this chapter did them dirty :(

Any thoughts about what's to come up next? Nate and Nik? Emma and Roman?
Little Nathan? ;)

See ya around and soon ;)